What is not to love about Marlon Byrd? He is one of twenty-one hitters who have 49 homeruns over the past two seasons, and is on pace this year to hit over 20 bombs again. He has been on the DL since June 2nd and just came off this past Friday. I understand the batting average is something to be concerned with, but even if that’s your issue, he is still a donkey (the flying donkey to be exact), and donkeys are useful… and they are really darn useful in fantasy baseball. You rent them like a lady-friend on a trip to Vegas, and if they bring you some winnings, you keep them around a few days to give you a place to rest your hand. Now, like our friends in Vegas, you never keep them around any longer than your trip. Byrd could be a creep-to-own, so be prepared to hold if he comes out of the gate hot. But enough about Byrd, I’ll cover him below. It’s Fathers Day today, and being that my dad introduced me to the Yardbirds, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t add some title-related links into the fold, as I know you enjoy it and I think it irks Jay.

The Yardbirds were one of the first British invasion bands I really enjoyed. I was around nine when I heard my first song from them, and I was hooked. I’m not one of those guys where I have to find the coolest most obscure songs to call my favorite, I enjoy a lot of them regardless if they are well known or not. For Your Love is still a great track, as is this gem that gets a reboot in this contemporary live version featuring Jeff Beck. When I was younger, there was no internet, so you had to rely on books, magazines, and the cloudy memories of old people to know how many dynamic guitarists (Eric Clapton, Jeff Beck and Jimmy Page) played with this group. I always found it fascinating that Jimmy Page called Led Zeppelin the New Yardbirds at first and brought this great track along with him.

This week, the 10.8% owned Marlon Byrd takes a roady from the hitter friendly confines of Great American and travels to Pittsburgh and New York. Excuse me J-FOH, then why do we want to play him in those more pitcher friendly parks? As I referenced above he should be more widely owned and I’m jumping all over his sale pitch. You still didn’t answer the question. Here’s my pitch, I wrote it in an elevator. What would you say if I can get you into an eight dollar player today for the low low cost of one dollar? Is that something you might be interested in? What’s that? You want to hear more? I have a thing for players that get series in ballparks they used to call home, and in the 2013 season, Byrd played well in both home parks he’s in this week (he was on the Mets and then got traded to the Pirates at the deadline). I glanced at the starters he faces and he has positive numbers against half of them, but also faces Harvey. I’m not worried though, Harvey has been hit or miss this year. Yes Harvey fans, I love him too, but he has shown me is human, and is not a reason for me to not recommend Byrd as a creeper. He also faces Cole too. Oh damn, that’s ballsy Mr. FOH! Yes it is, but he bats .400 against with a dong (small sample size…TWSS) so we at least know he CAN hit him. I was texting with Sky as I wrote this, and no we don’t sext… anymore, and he concurred that we love older players coming off the DL to do some damage. He’s a rested veteran and this is when they are at their best. If he hasn’t been snaked yet I would go grab him and get him in your line-up! No seriously go do it.

Creepy Catcher has been a limping dog with fleas all year. I decided to defer to the Hitter-Tron this week, as I got a coded message left for me on my defiled toaster. It says: get Robinson Chirinos in your line-up. I say to hold for the first half of the week and get acquainted with Wellingon Castillo as he opens the week on Tuesday with three at Coors. After the Rockies series go Chirinos as he goes to the right handed friendly Rogers Center. Damn, I forgot about Monday. If Cameron Rupp gets the start in NY, I might be inclined to roll with him. He’s been hitting lately when he gets his opps and it feels like Ruiz is 50. (I’m sure Mike will come correct me, also, I liked it better when he was Maikel, maybe we can get him to drop the “a” be Mikel)

Top 100 Hitters, Week 12

Rank Player Pos Team
1 Mike Trout OF LAA
2 Paul Goldschmidt 1B ARI
3 Giancarlo Stanton OF MIA
4 Miguel Cabrera 1B DET
5 Anthony Rizzo 1B CHC
6 Bryce Harper OF WAS
7 Jose Abreu 1B CHW
8 Justin Upton OF SD
9 Josh Donaldson 3B TOR
10 Todd Frazier 3B CIN
11 Jose Bautista OF TOR
12 Troy Tulowitzki SS COL
13 Jose Altuve 2B HOU
14 Nolan Arenado 3B COL
15 Andrew McCutchen OF PIT
16 Adam Jones OF BAL
17 Ryan Braun OF MIL
18 Prince Fielder 1B TEX
19 Carlos Gomez OF MIL
20 Starling Marte OF PIT
21 Nelson Cruz OF SEA
22 Yasiel Puig OF LAD
23 Albert Pujols 1B LAA
24 Jason Kipnis 2B CLE
25 Adrian Gonzalez 1B LAD
26 Edwin Encarnacion 1B TOR
27 Kris Bryant 3B CHC
28 Hanley Ramirez SS BOS
29 Dee Gordon 2B MIA
30 George Springer OF HOU
31 Joey Votto 1B CIN
32 Freddie Freeman 1B ATL
33 Manny Machado 3B BAL
34 Michael Brantley OF CLE
35 Buster Posey C SF
36 Brian Dozier 2B MIN
37 Yoenis Cespedes OF DET
38 A.J. Pollock OF ARI
39 Joc Pederson OF LAD
40 Charlie Blackmon OF COL
41 Brett Gardner OF NYY
42 Eric Hosmer 1B KC
43 Mark Teixeira 1B NYY
44 J.D. Martinez OF DET
45 David Ortiz DH BOS
46 Kolten Wong 2B STL
47 Anthony Rendon 2B WAS
48 Steven Souza OF TB
49 Chris Davis 3B BAL
50 Evan Gattis C HOU
51 Brandon Moss OF CLE
52 Kole Calhoun OF LAA
53 Jhonny Peralta SS STL
54 Carlos Gonzalez OF COL
55 Yasmany Tomas 3B ARI
56 Kendrys Morales 1B KC
57 Kyle Seager 3B SEA
58 Carlos Santana 3B CLE
59 Pablo Sandoval 3B BOS
60 Matt Carpenter 3B STL
61 Billy Hamilton OF CIN
62 Dustin Pedroia 2B BOS
63 Carlos Correa SS HOU
64 Ian Kinsler 2B DET
65 Jose Reyes SS TOR
66 Lucas Duda 1B NYM
67 Stephen Vogt C OAK
68 Brandon Belt 1B SF
69 Jay Bruce OF CIN
70 Gregory Polanco OF PIT
71 Mookie Betts OF BOS
72 Shin-Soo Choo OF TEX
73 Matt Kemp OF SD
74 Avisail Garcia OF CHW
75 Josh Reddick OF OAK
76 Cameron Maybin OF ATL
77 Alex Gordon OF KC
78 Denard Span OF WAS
79 Maikel Franco 3B PHI
80 Evan Longoria 3B TB
81 Mark Trumbo OF SEA
82 Leonys Martin OF TEX
83 Howie Kendrick 2B LAD
84 Jason Heyward OF STL
85 Mike Moustakas 3B KC
86 Alex Rodriguez 3B NYY
87 Adam LaRoche 1B CHW
88 Christian Yelich OF MIA
89 Brandon Crawford SS SF
90 Billy Burns OF OAK
91 Dexter Fowler OF CHC
92 Marcell Ozuna OF MIA
93 Robinson Cano 2B SEA
94 Lorenzo Cain OF KC
95 Nori Aoki OF SF
96 Joey Gallo 3B TEX
97 DJ LeMahieu 2B COL
98 Torii Hunter OF MIN
99 Kevin Pillar OF TOR
100 Ben Revere OF PHI

DL – Jacoby EllsburyDavid Wright, Jorge SolerAdrian BeltreHunter PenceMatt HollidayRyan ZimmermanCorey DickersonEnder InciarteWil Myers

Ian Desmond is gone! Ian Desmond is gone! I have had a nice stretch of players turning it around when I either drop them completely out of the top 100 or I drop a deuce on them. I’m like the Triumph the Insult Comic Dog of fantasy hitters. For me to poop on. I dumped on LoCain, by dropping him all the way out of the top 100 and he blew right back up and back into Grey’s good graces. If you need some under performing player hating, I do requests and…..bar mitzvahs!

Anthony Rizzo is so damn good. I was talking to Sky the other night and we are both in awe of his awesomeness. He is elite and still has enough honor to take a knee while he hits a bomb. According to our player rater, among the other first round players, if you drafted him fifth you would of been dead on. I own him in only one league and I cry myself to sleep every night wishing I had him in more…except the ones where I own Trout, Giancarlo, and Miggy. I own Au Shizz in no leagues. Sad emoji.


I crap on Cargo and he rewards us with dongs. Over the last two weeks he has gone yard six times and has completely cleansed the crap I left on him. Grey told you to buy low and if you listened then you owe him a daquiri and a bottle of vape juice. Looking at his batted ball profile for June and he has dropped his ground ball percentage 19.45%, increased his fly ball percentage 24.65%, and has increased his home run to fly ball up 10.2%. One stat that really surprised me this month is he has no change to his BABIP. At .277, same as May, he has even more room to grow if he can start hitting more line drives.


Up goes Frazier! Up goes Frazier! I can’t ignore the Todd anymore. Damn, I miss that show. Frazier is fourth on the player rater and is on pace for AT LEAST 100 RUNS, 100 RBI’s, 32 HR’s, 13 SB’s, .280 BA. That feels safe to me, could be more in homers but his HR/FB (22%) is highest since his 41 game rookie year (23.1%) It’s also not high enough for me to throw a red flag. I’ll throw a corral colored flag. His hard contact is up over 9% this year, his ground ball rate is down 10 % and his flyball rate is up 11%. And don’t even get me started on his ISO. Okay I will, he has the 3rd highest ISO,behind Bryce and Giancarlo, and with 20 doubles is tied for third with a shizz ton of others. I like doubles, being able to hit yourself to second more than others means you are putting yourself in a greater position to create an RBI or a run. Actually of that top three which is actually ten guys, he is the only one with more than 15 HR’s (he has 22).


Well, would you look at that, Manny Machado got his Man Muscles! Thank you Lloyd Christmas McClendon. Speaking of Lloyd, congratulations Mariners fans on the hiring of Edgar Martinez. That was one hell of a professional hitter. I should of knew something was up when Tehol drafted Manny at the end of the 6th round in the ‘perts league. If anyone is going to know about the development of man muscles between the ages of 20 and 22, it’s Tehol…hehe, kidding Tehol, unless you’re cool with it then yeah. Manny has already matched his career high in home runs (14) and at only 22, would be flying up my dynasty board. Looking at his batted ball profile and everything is in a nice trajectory that doesn’t scream red flags. He’s also third on our player rater for all 3rd basemen ahead of guys like Nolan and Bryant. He has MACHADISMO! Which is like machismo but different because it’s from Baltimore.





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  1. Banana says:

    Is giving Souza or Betts and one of Votto or Rizzo too much to give up for Stanton and Rendon in an OBP league?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Banana: I dont see the point of Rizzo getting moved to acquire Stanton.

      • Banana says:

        @J-FOH: Rizzo + either Betts/Souza I mean, for both Rendon and Stanton. My OF is weak and I have too many 1B’s already

        • J-FOH says:

          @Banana: sure, Id do it and between the two (Betts and Rendon) it depends on need

  2. The Great Knoche says:

    If Desmond does well, (Good start, hit and a SB) can ya get Ozuna out of here next week?

    • J-FOH says:

      @The Great Knoche: I’ll put him under consideration

  3. Boss says:

    You seem optimistic morales will turn it around. Would you move Devon Travis to get him?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Boss: depends on needs, who plays instead of Travis?

      • Rep says:

        @J-FOH: cano

        • J-FOH says:

          @Rep: Id make the deal

  4. D says:

    Lindor over semien,russell?

    • J-FOH says:

      @D: not over russell

  5. Young says:

    Drop Ozuna or yelich for byrd?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Young: Ozuna

  6. Mikey B says:

    Drop Polanco or Buxton for betts?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Mikey B: Buxton for betts

  7. royce! says:

    Nothing like a good old “when I was young, there was no internet” story, especially when you throw in Clapton, Beck and Page. Wait…was this column an elaborate Father’s Day joke?

    Just pulling your chain. Happy Father’s Day, Jack!

    • J-FOH says:

      @royce!: HA! Yes and no. don’t pull so hard

  8. Kluber Troopers says:

    12 team 5×5 roto

    I could use some more speed and pitching. What do you think about my Adam Jones and Jesse Chavez for Springer and Liriano?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Kluber Troopers: i like it if you can take the batting average hit

  9. Alex says:

    Would you mark reynolds over juan uribe as beltre replacement this week?

    I just have to say this post is the most helpful thing each week. Thanks a lot

    • J-FOH says:

      @Alex: Reynolds

    • J-FOH says:

      @Alex: and thank you for the kind words

  10. Malicious Phenom says:

    Correa or Reyes ROS?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Malicious Phenom: I’m drinking the Correa Kool Aid. Reyes is a “if he stays healthy guy”

  11. Bobby's world says:

    Howdy j-foh

    In a h2h points league w/ a weekly roster lock which bat would you add for depth or maybe more, for week 12 & possibly beyond.

    Evan longoria, jay Bruce, Luis valbuena, wil venable, Mitch Moreland , Wilmer Flores, steve Souza, maikel Franco, Joey Gallo or stash Corey seager.

    My offense:

    C- Vogt

    1b- Edwin encarncian

    2b- howie Kendrick

    3b- Todd Frazier

    SS- Hanley Ramirez

    IF- Kris Bryant

    OF- puig

    OF- Bryce Harper

    OF- joc Pederson

    OF- Byron buxton

    DH- Carlos Santana

    Utility – Carlos correa

    Bench: mark trumbo (1b/OF), Josh reddick, Brock holt (3b/OF)

    Thanks man! Have a good one!

    • J-FOH says:

      @Bobby’s world: I would dump Buxton and Holt and grab Franco and Bruce. In fact I would take Souza over Reddick

      • Bobby's World says:

        @J-FOH: @J-FOH:

        Thanks bud! What are your thoughts on longoria ROS? I was planning on dropping holt & buxton too

        • Bobby's World says:

          @Bobby’s World:

          Marlon Byrd is available too

        • J-FOH says:

          @Bobby’s World: I havent liked lono for the past couple of seasons

  12. chucky says:

    Happy Papa Day. Enjoying the grandkids…..my kids I could do without j/k. As my daughter told me…your grandkids are your reward for not killing us.
    Would you bench Bryant with his awfully tough matchup v the Trolley Dodgers ie Kershaw, Grienke as well as the St Louie staff with Wacha, Lackey and CMart? Possible replacments are CDavis, Longo, Seagar and Rendon. ( Two leagues obviously).

    • J-FOH says:

      @chucky: Id run Seager out there

  13. Chris says:

    Trevor rosenthal for Carlos correa a fair trade? Currently have Desmond as my ss

    • J-FOH says:

      @Chris: meh. I’d hold

  14. Greyer says:

    How is Carlos Gomez a top20 hitter at this point of the year? I’m thinking there was more thought put in to the unfunny jokes in this post than the actual top 100 list.

    • J-FOH says:

      @Greyer: it’s good to have an opinion

  15. Jerry says:

    Hey, Jack Full! Bruce or Heyward ros? Also, Heston or Chavez ros? Thanks and enjoy the rest of the weekend!

    • J-FOH says:

      @Jerry: you too. Bruce chavez

  16. Big Magoo

    Big Magoo says:

    Calling Marlon the yardbyrd makes it sound like he’s giving Ron Jeremy a run for his money. To each his own…

    Over the last four days, Betts has a 6/2/5/1/.579 batting line. Just an observation.

    • J-FOH says:

      @Big Magoo: oh magoo. I saw what Betts did and I held him back so he is even better when I bump him next week. Bull!

      Funny, I’ve met Ron Jeremy a few times in my life. Most recently at my local dive bar where he was promoting his new rum. It was kind of weird. He wore sweat pants and Some of the girls went to the bathroom with him for a few minutes to see.

      • Big Magoo

        Big Magoo says:

        @J-FOH: No, don’t you dare move Betts. I have him in a few leagues. He’s doing just fine where he is. Don’t Hanley him!

        That’s funny about Ron. I’d imagine that the first 10 seconds or so after seeing him would be exciting, then it’s all downhill from there. Unless he decides to settle in at the bar and tell a few stories.

        • J-FOH says:

          @Big Magoo: thats what I was thinking. tell me a story Ron!

  17. M says:

    Waiting to hear if CarGo (brewers) needs a DL stint. If not plug him or Buxton into a weekly lineup? 6×6 roto obp

    • J-FOH says:

      @M: I’ve been pretty busy today so I haven’t got to all the news. If gomez is playing he’s in. Bux has done nothing so far

  18. Groovy says:

    franco, turner or gallo ros?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Groovy: Franco

  19. JRun says:

    Great write up, I hope abreu lives up to his ranking

    • J-FOH says:

      @JRun: me too. If Chicago wasn’t so collectively down I wouldn’t be as high on him. But like Pujols he can change his numbers in a few weeks time.

  20. wjessereid says:

    Should I dump Carlos Santana for Tomas?

    12 team H2H.

    Could you also take a nice steamy one on Pollock, dudes been slipping a bit?

    • J-FOH says:

      @wjessereid: sure why not, and pollock will be fine

  21. S>H says:

    Do you deal your C.Seager ,M.Sano, G.Cole and a second round pick for Goldy , and Jordan ZImmerman.?
    I have Hamels,Arrieta,Keuchel,Hahn,Burnett,Simon,Santiago,Dickey,K.Hendricks in my rotation as well , Oh ya it is a forever keeper league.Head to head

    • J-FOH says:

      @S>H: I wouldn’t do that in dynasty

  22. Yariel says:

    Keeper league question

    I was offered Puig – $17 for my Bautista- $36 and Soler- $11

    It’s a 12 team league so I don’t think Soler is as valuable considering there are plenty of OFs in free agency. I feel Puig at that price is too good to pass up. My current OF is McCutch, Bautista, and Brantley. What are your thoughts? Thanks in advance.

    • J-FOH says:

      @Yariel: Ina keeper I want Soler, will he do bats straight up for Puig?

  23. Hern says:

    Who gets my everyday UTIL spot, Correa or VMart? Thanks!

    • J-FOH says:

      @Hern: Correa

  24. The Giant Brain says:

    What am I missing with ranking Leonys Martin at 82? Better than Cain? Arod? Burns? Aoki?

    • J-FOH says:

      @The Giant Brain: Martin has been really unlucky so far and yet he still can reach 10/30 with a .275 batting average.

      Cain is very streaky and has injury history so its hard to forecast a full season, Burns has no track record, A-Rod, I doubt he finishes the year without a DL trip and I predict he bats .240 ROS, and Aoki, is way over his head right now.

  25. Scott says:

    Your Justin Turner creeper seems to be working out rather well lately.

    • J-FOH says:

      @Scott: he sat a lot that week and I dont think he is a long term fix, but I’ll take it when he gets to play. Olivera should be here sooner than later and will cut into his time

  26. CoachCalRules says:

    Someone trading to dump Polanco on me for my Seager (Corey). Any chance Polanco turns things around?

  27. Relsh says:

    You seem to have Pablo pretty high considering his sprained ankle, think we can expect him to play every day this week?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Relsh: its not a weekly rank, my editor puts that in. I wouldnt play him in a weekly league

  28. Brandon says:

    Love your rankings. Long time reader, first time commenter:
    Im in a 12 team auction keeper league. Salaries go up after 2 years, we keep 8 every year and were in year 1. I think I can get Frazier ($15) for Joc Pederson ($9) and one of the following three: Moss ($7), Santana ($17), or K. Morales ($1).
    I really like Joc and he is 22, but my OF is pretty deep, I also have Trout, Brantly, Pollock, Yelich, and Dickerson on the DL, and figured I could use the CI upgrade.
    Or I could try to flesh out another deal sending one of my outfielders for an upgrade at SS or MI where I have Bogaerts, Kendrick, and Kang. (I have Gordan at 2b).
    If you think I should go for Frazier which of those three CI do you include in the deal. Or do you think I need more help up the middle?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Brandon: Id move Moss

  29. Mikey B says:

    Start Chavez @texas? Hammel vs LAD? Carlos Martinez @miami?

    • J-FOH says:

      @Mikey B: Id start all three

  30. Crapshoot Kershaw says:

    didn’t know dazed was a yardbirds song first. pixies also covered evil hearted you on one of their singles, my first knowledge of that song.

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