Zach Eflin has to be one of the Phils fans favorite pitchers. His last name just rolls off their tongue. “You kiss your mother with that mouth?” “You’re Eflin right! And I’m kissing her right now. On Facetime. She’s a Merchant Marine, and stationed overseas. It’s actually very sweet how we kiss. With SnapChat filters. That dresses me in a baby bonnet. TMI?” Sure, it was a short schedule day, so this might have something to do with my joy at Zach Eflin. Yesterday, he went 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 9 Ks, ERA at 0.71. It’s only through 12 2/3 IP so o?ekávání. I know. That’s what I thought too, but then I started looking at his numbers, and, ugh, it’s 12 2/3 IP, but you gotta be Eflin kidding me? He has a 9.2 K/9, 2.1 BB/9 and a 94 MPH fastball, that is up two miles from last year. Maybe this is a blip, but maybe this is encouragement you receive to burp from your Facetime’ing mom. Also, in this game, Odubel Herrera hit some ding dongs — 2-for-3, 3 runs, 5 RBIs and his 4th and 5th homer — because ODB waited until everyone was out on him after last year. Damn, ODB, why you gotta ad-lib some fire after I’m no longer invested in you? ODB with more ad-libs than Quavo after a fifth of Cuervo, and Columbus, Ohio seeing the Cleveland Indians and being like, “Yo, I descubierto’d.” (I really had to fight for that third rhyme.) Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Today, we take a look at the positional battles for the National League East, a division that is quite emblematic of the US of A. The power and leadership resides in Washington DC. The New York Mets have the money, 11th highest payroll in baseball, but they are not the Yankees. Atlanta. Sorry, I mean Hotlanta, always gets overlooked, but there’s tons of talent down south. We may be seeing lots of non-Native Americans tomahawk chopping on TV very soon. Philadelphia is usually in the shadow of New York. Well, the Eagles won the Super Bowl, so suck on that New Yorkers. I kid. There’s tons of young talent on the Phillies, especially on the pitching side, but they will continue to play in the shadow of their brethren to the east. Miami. This is where things break down. A city of opulence and culture, yet the Marlins sold off all their assets like a Pookie crackhead would for one last hit. The only way I can tie this into the US of A analogy is that Miami is located in the state of Florida, a state in which the lawmakers said that porn is dangerous but refused to talk about assault rifles. Ladies and gentlemen, the NL East.
The 2018 Razzball Commenter Leagues are now open! Free to join with prizes! All the exclamation points!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Welcome to Razzball’s 2018 team previews. Over the next couple of months, we’ll be previewing all of the teams and talking to writers who represent those teams around the web. We want to provide the best and most in-depth fantasy projections to go along with the asking the most useful questions to those who know their teams best. We want to talk about the players in the first half of your draft and also the deep sleepers that make you log into google and start watching Midwest Single-A ball for hours. Just kidding, don’t do that, hopefully we don’t go that far…
The New York Mets are just two full seasons removed from a World Series appearance. There are still a lot of the same pieces in the clubhouse that were apart of the World Series run. After the two disaster seasons that followed, Terry Collins is out and former Cleveland Indians Pitching coach, Mickey Callaway, is in. Perhaps Callaway can right the ship for a rotation that has the potential to be among the best in the majors. The Mets also brought back Jay Bruce and Michael Conforto is due back in May. I get Steve Sypa’s thoughts on Conforto and Bruce and much more. You can find Steve’s work at Amazin’ Avenue.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I have to keep this short, because after the jump is going to be the longest post you’ve ever seen in your life. How do I know all the posts you’ve seen to compare this one to? Because I’m sitting behind you. *waves* Hey! I’ve given you the top 10 for 2018 fantasy baseball, top 20 for 2018 fantasy baseball and top 20 catchers for 2018 fantasy baseball. All projections included are mine, and where I see tiers starting and stopping are included. Let’s do this! Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2018 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Carlos Santana was signed by the Phils. Did Carlos Santana ever have a song called, “Harumph?” Cause he’s making me harumph all over the place. Doesn’t Hoskins play 1B? Will Santana move to 3rd? I agree, Maikel hasn’t been great, but he’s too young to give up on. Maybe Santana plays outfield? Hoskins plays outfield? Maybe they juggle left field? Maybe they juggle balls hit to them in left field? Maybe they’re juggalos? I got questions, y’all! The scenario of Hoskins in the outfield seems most likely with Franco getting pushed down the order, but not out of the lineup entirely. This might be something to watch in the spring with The Jacked Up Jew, and how he manages his new Latin classic rock guitarist. As for Santana, his stats last year look like that of an aging slugger. Carlos Santana’s gone from Oye Como Va to a hard-of-hearing Latino, ‘Oye come again?’ His average home run distance from 2016 to 2017 came down ten feet, but Citizens Flank might help a little. His line drive rate went up, but his fly balls are going nowhere, and his Hard Contact was down. He’s even seeing more pitches inside the zone, because people just aren’t scared of him anymore. His stats don’t scream, ‘The end is nigh,’ but they are whispering, ‘Soon, my pretty.’ For 2018, I’ll give Carlos Santana projections of 74/24/81/.257/4 in 552 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
If you hail from Central New Jersey, sorry. I didn’t mean to get your hopes up. Albert Pujols does not represent the 609. If you are a Ludacris fan, sorry. Pujols may or may not have garden hoes in different area codes, but I can neither confirm nor deny it. Rather, Pujols slugged his 609th career home run Friday night. It doesn’t matter that it came off Jeremy Hellickson, who’s allowed the 14th-most home runs this season, and is already the 439th-worst of all time. I was going to go on an epic rant about how all the stories are focused on the fact that he’s tied with Sammy Sosa for the most home runs by a foreign-born player. Who gives a flying F where he was born? Then I started thinking, I wonder which player born in Los Angeles has hit the most home runs. Yet again, I’ve managed to stymie myself. Anyways, who cares that Pujols has a triple slash of .229/.274/.374 with an ISO of .144. Let’s just celebrate the great career he’s had and send him off into the sunset after this season. My self checks to make sure this is his last year…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Matt Grace picked up his 2nd save in as many games on Saturday for the Nationals, and Ben Zobrist’s wife started to work on a song titled, “Saving Grace,” and requested Ben’s trade to Washington. Then, first thing on Sunday, the Nats traded for Ryan Madson and Sean Doolittle, and Saving Grace became a B-side for “Halleberrylujah, A Catwoman Licks Herself (Rated PG).” When asked if the trade makes his team better, the Nats’ GM said, “That’s right,” and, “I’m Mike Rizzo.” Picture this: Dusty and Rizzo looking at a book called, “Baseball Strategy.” Rizzo looks at Dusty, and Dusty says, “I got the baseball part,” and Rizzo nods his head. Finally, Rizzo chimes in, “I don’t know the 2nd word and I don’t think it’s worth investigating.” Dusty agrees, and that’s the Nationals. So, who will close between Madson and Doolittle? Your guess = my guess. I’d want to say Madson, but it could be either, both or neither as they trade for David Robertson or someone else. By the time the calendar turns to August, the Nationals might have five closers from teams not in the pennant chase. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
It is the time of year where we see daily grind injuries. Sore backs, back stiffness, back discomfort etc. A lot of injuries that just accumulate from playing six games a week in the summer heat. If you thought we’ve had a lot of injuries so far — I have a sneaking suspicion there are going to be more of these type of injuries. Not season ending — just break down injuries. If you have an opportunity to acquire a multi-position player like Brandon Drury, Danny Valencia, Chris Taylor or Taylor Motter you might make it through these injuries better than your opponents.Please, blog, may I have some more?
When Ryan Zimmerman hits a homer, they should play the Coming to America clip where Murphy says, “In dee face,” at the basketball game. Speaking of Africa (sentence intro commonly found on fantasy baseball blogs), why is it called Out of Africa if it’s in Africa? Granted, I’ve never seen that movie, but the one thing I know about it is that it is in Africa! Straight Outta Compton is in Compton, but they get OUTTA OF COMPTON! This post is brought to you by Meryl Movie Lovers, or MeMoLos, as they’re commonly referred. Two more homers for Ryan Zimmerman yesterday, bringing his season total to 19 homers. Shame I didn’t believe in him (and still don’t). Why do I have more doubt than Meryl Streep in a habit? Answer me that, MeMoLos! He’s 32 years old, and, in his last two years, he had 15 and 16 homers. In eleven years, he’s only topped 26 homers once. So, don’t even give me that crap that I should’ve seen this coming. He’s hitting .372! Last year, he hit .218 and .249 the year before, and only hit over .300 one year in his career. He’s not having a career year. Nope. He’s combining all of his years together into one year, putting them into a Magic Bullet, pulverizing them for five minutes and drinking it. And, like Meryl sold French cuisine to an American audience in Julie & Julia, I’m still selling Zimmerman. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’m at my computer checking baseball news about six months a year. Give or take about five hours here and there. On Saturday, it was one of those times I was away from my computer, due to a family wedding in Cape May. Closer change, prospect call-up. Happens when you’re away from the computer, that’s it. Call it a wrap. With Prospector Ralph in the league, there’s no chance for me. Around 6 PM, I got the dreaded text. “Lewis Brinson was called up.” Too bad I didn’t see it until about 7 PM. Had a lavender-flavored champagne in one hand, a lobster claw in the other hand, my mom was like, “You have butter dripping down your chin,” my grandfather was complaining Bruno Mars doesn’t have good choruses in his songs, and there was the text, sitting there on a locked iPhone screen. Done. Sigh. Well, if you got him, or can still get Brinson, you should. Jonathan Villar hit the DL, and, brucely, he wasn’t playing well and Keon Broxton (1-for-4 and his 7th homer yesterday) moves to a platoon role. Unless Brinson totally flames out, he’s up, and playing for good in center. In Triple-A, he had six homers and seven steals in 45 games, which is what I’d expect from him in the majors. Your basic 25/25/.280 guy. Yesterday, he hit leadoff went 0-for-2 with two walks and stole his first base. Yes, he should be owned everywhere, and could be the Trea Turner-type call-up of the year. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’m not a religious girl, but when I was sitting down to write this post and saw the magic words “Stephen Strasburg versus the San Diego Padres” and also “@COL” (mmm, strudel), I raised my hands and gave up a “hallelujah.” Which caused some raised eyebrows in the coffee shop I was sitting in, let me tell you (ugh, whatEVer, Man Yelling Into Skype About His Deck Repairs).
So it’s fair to say I’m reasonably excited about Stephen’s match-up today. Even if he does cost me $11,100 (gulp). Collectively, the Padres are hitting .221 at time of writing. They’re the third-worst team in MLB (and I hate pointing all this stuff out — I do root for the Padres). I have some worries: so far this year, Strasburg’s K/9 is a little down (8.80) and his ERA at home is not ideal (4.00 at home versus 2.70 away), but I gotta have faith. I also want to stack some Rockies and Cardinals bats. Trying to squeeze all this into my FanDuel salary cap is gonna hurt like kneeling too long at church when you’re as old as I am, but I’ll make it work.
New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!Please, blog, may I have some more?
The fantasy baseball roster you could make out of the current disabled list would easily be in first place in many rotisserie leagues. If you left your draft with all of these players healthy you would probably be pretty confident of your trophy chances. Granted, if you left your draft with these players I’d question the skills of your league mates.
Fun story, I once joined a friend’s new fantasy baseball league and one of the members had never done fantasy sports before. He drafted every offensive position in order starting with catcher in round 1. This was my actual reaction when I realized what was going on in about the 3rd or 4th round… Needless to say his pitching was a disaster.Please, blog, may I have some more?