2021 Razzball Videos


Accidentally claimed Jose Siri in one league by holding down my iPhone home button, but, as I always say, it’s better to be lucky than good. Which is why I never learned how to drive, I simply rub a rabbit’s foot and go vroom vroom. If you Anglo’d up Jose Siri into Joe Siri, it almost sounds like you’re saying a Yo Mama joke to Siri, and if you’re saying a Yo Mama joke to Siri, you got some free time on your hands, huh? Clear schedule, you got. Here’s what Prospect Itch said of Jose Siri recently, “Siri seems unlikely to hit any better (than Myles Straw), but he has elite athleticism and good bat speed. Sounds a little like Adolis Garcia and any number of other forgotten nowhere men to pop from the upper minors and into our fantasy hearts. I’ve always liked Siri, and hate Grey.” Geez, man, c’mon. In Triple-A, Jose Siri went 16/24/.318. Yeah, I was surprised at how good he was there too. “Siri, please call Triple-A and tell them I have a flat tire.” That’s me after someone steps on the back of my shoe. For now, Siri is a fill-in for injured Astros’ outfielders (mostly Brantley), but they’re headed to the playoffs, so they might rest their guys a lot, which means playing time for Siri. If you need a guy who can fill all five categories, you should press your iPhone home button too. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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We’re really coming down to the wire now with less than two weeks left in the season so it’s time to pull out all the stops and just go for it. Even though the season is winding down, there are still lots of available hitters who are heating up. Don’t let football distract you from the championship you’ve been chasing all season. You need to make your moves now and the guys below can help carry you there. Now go win that trophy.

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Cleveland’s Franmil Reyes ($3,400) has been crushing the ball over the last month, batting .275 with nine home runs. Could you imagine what his power numbers would look like in a park like Yankee Stadium? Well, you don’t have to wonder much longer, as he’s there tonight! Reyes will face Corey Kluber, who has been awful since returning from the injured list, posting an 8.49 ERA and allowing a home run in all three starts. Using Reyes will also provide you with leverage over anybody using Kluber as their pitcher in larger field tournaments, particularly if paired with Jose Ramirez ($4,000). Either way – as a standalone or a stack, Franmil smash.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

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“Mr. Roboto,” is Rudy singing to his computer screen about his robots. I say, “Rudy, what is your favorite robot?” Rudy says, “Well, I have the Pigskinonator for fantasy football, the Streamonator for streaming pitchers, the Stocktononator for fantasy basketball and the Friendonator to find a replacement for you. I guess the Friendonator would have to be my favorite.” That’s pretty cool, Rudy, thanks. So, my favorite robot of his, since I don’t follow any of those other sports is, the Streamonator. Something about a sad, lonely robot sitting at a roadside diner unable to eat peach pie because it will rust itself. Its only solace is picking the best starters of the day over the din of Roy Orbison. Sad and metallic, “Pretty woman, working down the street.” Plus, the Streamonator had me loving Jordan Montgomery (5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 3.63) yesterday, and loves, loves, lurves his next one vs. the Rangers. Of course, I love Jordan outside of matchups — no JoMo! What’s odd (to me, at least); Jordan Montgomery’s peripherals — 9.3 K/9, 2.9 BB/9, 3.56 FIP, 1.25 WHIP — and his team should have everyone thinking of Jordan Montgomery for 2022 fantasy in a better light than he deserves, but I get the sense people think less of him. No idea why that is, maybe it’s his stuff — 92.5 MPH fastball, reliant on curve and change — maybe it’s something else. Perhaps Rudy has a robot to tell us why people think how they do, like a Brainonator. “Yes, but it doesn’t work on you.” That hurts, Rudy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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The last several weeks have actually shown us some rare late season clarity with respect to bullpens. Due to a combination of injuries and some pitchers taking control we have a bunch of newly minted full-time closers. In fact, some of the saves leaders in the last 14 days have come from teams well out of contention. This shows the importance of remaining active on the wire to find closer gems. Don’t let up as one save could be the difference between fantasy glory and a losing season.

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The Fantasy Baseball Head to Head season is coming to an end.  We can all hope that it goes the way of some other amazing finishes, like MASH, Breaking Bad, and Parks and Rec.  I feel it is my sole responsibility to deliver the goods this week so that your Head to Head finish isn’t reminiscent of the final episode of Game of Thrones or Quantum Leap.  So Sam Beckett could have always lept back home, and he ultimately never did?  Huh?  That is the equivalent of Vlad Jr being forced to jump into the body of Matt Carpenter to get his batting average over the Mendoza mark, and never choose to return to his glorious MVP self.  Oh well.  

Contrary to other weeks, depending on your league format and assuming it isn’t a keeper-based league, you can now just drop any player that can’t help you, or won’t hurt you by your opponent adding them.  If you have a starter pitching on Wednesday or later, you can drop him after their start and move on to the next guy.  This weeks’ schedule is filled with tricks and treats that should help you gain an edge over your competitor if you can strike while the iron is hot.  And I am not using that reference as an homage to that garbage fest of a finale in Game of Thrones.  Don’t get me wrong, the show had to end, but it was as if the MLB condensed the entire playoffs into a game of Strat-O-Matic.  

So what can we look for in this final week?

9-Game Week: Cleveland (2-Double Headers)

8-Game Week: St. Louis & Chicago White Sox

5-Game Week: New York Mets & Boston 

Interleague Matchups

MIA @ TB. (MIA gains DH) 

BAL @ PHI  (BAL loses DH) – Monitor Anthony Santander

NYM @ BOS (NYM gains DH)

MINN @ CHC (MINN loses DH) – Monitor Josh Donaldson

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We’re coming up on the end but as teams fight for playoff position there is still plenty of opportunities to win some of that sweet DFS cash. He may not be on a playoff team but Frank Schwindel (C/1B: $3,500)  just keeps hitting and is putting up a near top-shelf performance for not a top-shelf price. His salary has started to creep up, but he’s still below the top tier price-wise. So get schwifty and enjoy his top-tier numbers.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We hear, “Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels…” as the Think Different commercial plays. The middle of a black onyx stage opens, and slowly someone rises. First, we see their Yankees cap, then the glorious sheen, black-as-night mustache, which blinds us, it’s so beautiful. Finally, we see it’s Nestor Cortes Jr. in a black turtleneck and dad jeans. Nestor clicks on the microphone that is around his ear. “Thank you, Ashton Kutcher, for that lovely intro. Now, as many of you are wondering, how am I on the Yankees, and their no facial policy, with this gorgeous mustache. That answer is quite simple, actually. It’s due to my incredibly fast-growing facial hair. I shave every morning. I want to direct you now to my 500-slide Powerpoint explaining how my mustache grows in so fast.” Not only does Nestor Cortes Jr. have a fast-growing mustache like he’s out of the 1970s, he also has a 1970s vibe to his pitching. His release point changes with just about every pitch. Is his father, Nestor Orlando El Duque Hernandez Cortes Sr.? Last night, Cortes went 6 1/3, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 11 Ks, ERA at 2.60 in just under 80 IP, which is nothing to sneeze out, unless you’re allergic to quality fantasy starters. The worry with Cortes, much like it was with El Duque, he throws about 89 MPH. It’s a precarious game trying to keep MLB hitters off balance all the time. So far, Cortes has done it, and I’d try him for the rest of this year. For 2022 fantasy, Nestor Cortes Jr. feels like a guy who could be exposed as a gimmick. Now, excuse me, I want to get back to watching his mustache PowerPoint. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Washington OF Victor Robles is a priority target for me this off-season because I still think he’ll someday become the .280, 20 HR, 30 SB type he appeared to be before totally forgetting how to hit. The price is definitely Bob right now. I won’t go bidding into the wind of that dreamscape on the trade market if he’s rostered by a devout Robles believer, but chances are, the Robles-heavy investor is more than ready to diversify the portfolio. 

So why should we buy?

Just hope and hype of winters past?

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I always had issues with the expression, “Stay in your lane.” What if someone is driving in the fast lane and going super slow? Should they stay in their lane? NO! As bizarro Beyonce would sing, “To the right, to the right.” That said, the expression has tons of merit. If driving slow, stay in the right lanes and let others pass on the left. If you see three of four lanes littered with trucks, staying in the one without them would be most prudent. Which brings me to Lane Thomas of the Washington Nationals. He’s been added in 11.4% of ESPN leagues over the past week and, since joining the Nationals, has a .293/.383/.515 slash with a .222 ISO in 115 plate appearances. Should we continue to stay in this Lane?

Please, blog, may I have some more?