John Grisham is a veteran in the book game, as he’s written 43 of them. The Pelican Brief and The Firm were the two that elevated him to superstar status, but it was A Time to Kill that put him on the map. My money is on people thinking it was To Kill a Mockingbird, but whatever. By any means necessary, right? Anyways, A Time to Kill was about some southern drama, in which a ten-year-old girl was killed by two men. Girl was black. Men were white. The girl’s father takes justice into his own hands, clutched around an assault rifle. White community becomes enraged. The rest is lawyer blah blah blah. As the father to a four-year-old girl, there is no better time to kill. Man, this post has gotten a lot edgier than I anticipated. Let me quickly hop onto my segue and roll back onto the fantasy streets. We have one more week left in the fantasy season. It’s a……time to kill (Yes, this website is still free) and Trent Grisham of the Milwaukee Brewers, no relation to John as far as I know, could assist in ascertaining fantasy glory.

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From 1980 to 1995, Carl Lewis had one of the most dominating runs that any athlete has ever had: Top 10 ranking in every year, nine Olympic gold medals, one Olympic silver medal, and 10 World Championship medals. He monopolized the 100 m, 200 m, long jump events, and helped corner the markets in the 4 x 100 m and 4 x 200 m relays. He ran the 100 m race in under 10 seconds 15 times and the 200 m race in under 20 seconds 10 times. He sprinted to the finish line extremely fast and, more often than not, claimed victory. His brother from another mother, Kyle Lewis of the Seattle Mariners, is off to a blistering start as well, as he hit a home run in three consecutive games to begin his major league career. Did he shoot his wad too early, leaving nothing for the final two weeks? Or can he maintain this pace and help lead you to fantasy glory?

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We used to be inundated with the corniest commercials from McDonald’s. Ha! Gotta love the ’80s. But they worked, as people flocked and continue to flock to their establishments for the Big Mac. It’s estimated that close to 1 billion Big Macs are sold yearly around the globe. There was a time when each McDonald’s sign would show the number of people served. I remember when it was in the millions. Now they don’t even bother. It’s like when someone has F U money. There’s no need to count anymore and you look like an a-hole to everyone else if you do. With that said, it hasn’t been all good for McDonald’s, as there have been numerous failures throughout their history: McLobster Roll, Hula Burger, McPizza, McSpaghetti, Mc HotDog, and McDLT. Now, Nick Solak of the Texas Rangers has been en fuego to begin his major league career. Will he force MLB to produce Big Solak Attack commericals or will he go the way of the McDLT?

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Messiah is the strongest of strong descriptions to bestow upon someone. Savior. Liberator. Deliverer to the Promised Land. It is also the scratch-and-sniff of the literary world, as all the senses are aroused when the word is spoken; the rays of light raining down from the heavens and the singing by the angels. Personally, I smell the incense embedded into the mahagany pews, but cupcakes work just as well. How can we know who a true messiah is, though? Jesus of Nazareth is considered to be the preeminent Messiah in our society, but did he fulfill the messianic prophecies from the Old Testament of bringing universal peace and restoring Israel to it’s former glory? Back in the mid-400s, Moses of Crete declared himself to be the messiah and persuaded the Jews to walk into the sea in order to return to Israel. They all died. Wasn’t Matt Wieters the messiah for baseball not too long ago? On the flip side, the 2006 St. Louis Cardinals don’t win the World Series without David Eckstein. Messiah is a powerful yet broad word, as it fits a variety of perspectives. Sean Manaea of the Oakland Athletics has pitched two excellent games this season, and is scheduled for three more juicy starts, but could he help deliver you to the fantasy Promised Land?

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Change is always a difficult endeavor to endure. I smoked for over 25 years before I decided to try and quit. I don’t even remember how many times it took, but eventually after many years, and many attempts, I was finally able to do it. That shit was hard, so props to any of you that have done it. For those thinking about or are currently in the process of quitting, email me at [email protected] or DM on the Twitter machine @Stan_Son if you need someone to talk to. Maybe my experiences can help in some way. Ok, back to our regularly scheduled programming. During the process of quitting smoking, I got addicted to the CVS menthol cough drops. Now I can’t stop! And I gained a ton of weight. So I’m now in a new phase of change, which is to excercise and diet more, and stop going to CVS so much, but it’s tough. But like with smoking, I’ll get there, as long as I keep trying. It’s never too late to change, but change doesn’t happen overnight. Which brings me to Kolten Wong of the St. Louis Cardinals. Wong has been so right for the Cardinals, as he’s been carrying the club on his back recently. I’ve seen headlines of “must-watch tv” and “team MVP.” There’s also been mention of a new approach at the plate. Can it continue?

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Life is complicated. There are billions of people on planet Earth, each with different perspectives and motives, all trying to coexist together. Who is to say one is more correct than another? Just look at the many philosophical schools of thought: Empiricism, Rationalism, Idealism, Positivism, Stoicism, Structuralism, Materialism, Existentialism, Scepticism, Cynicism, and Romanticism. All attempt to describe and understand the fundamental nature of knowledge, reality, and existence. Why this? Why that? Why ask why? As a result, many experience paralysis by analysis. Hanser Alberto of the Baltimore Orioles does not have such problems, as his philosophy is simple, pure, and unadulterated: see ball, swing at ball, hit ball. Alberto has been the #44 player on the Razzball Player Rater over the past week, and has been added in 8.8% of ESPN leagues. Trash or treasure?

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Back on July 25th, I wrote Enter Santander, in which I endorsed Anthony Santander of the Baltimore Orioles. I didn’t think much about that piece until a commenter responded in a subsequent Will Smith piece, “please do not curse him as you did with Santander. Hit under .100 since your endorsement.” I wish I had that power. Anyways, then I saw that he was dropped in 5.1% of ESPN leagues over the past week. I own him in one league and he’s had some slumps. It’s baseball, but he hasn’t been killing my team. Then, I went back to the game logs and looked, and squinted, then looked again, and squinted again. I’m Asian, so maybe saying squinted is redundant but it happened. Anyways, here’s what I found.

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President Trump recently asked if we could nuke hurricanes. That question is normally reserved for: Sharknado 10 script meetings or when one is high as a kite watching the Weather Channel. But did you know that the idea was first mentioned back in 1959 at the Second Plowshare Symposium? By actual, well-respected scientists? Hey, I’m not a Trump guy, but I respect the out-of-the-box thinking, and I kind of get it. I mental masturbate about what I’d do if I won the lottery. Thank goodness, though, that we live in an anayltical world, in which scenarios can be debunked with numbers. The National Oceanic & Atmospheric Administration states that the energy needed to modify a hurricane “doesn’t seem promising.” “A fully developed hurrican releases the equivalent of a 10-megaton nuclear bomb exploding every 20 minutes.” For perspective, the bomb dropped on Hiroshima was over 600 times smaller, so around 2,000 of those would need to be dropped every hour. As Science Alert stated, “we would need to add more than half a billion tons of air….A nuke couldn’t do that.” Which brings me to Brock Burke of the Texas Rangers. Burke has been a hurricane since being called up on August 20th, annihilating both the Angels and White Sox. As a result, he’s been the most added player in ESPN leagues over the past week (30.2% – increase of 29.9%). Since we know that nukes cannot stop a hurricane, let’s see if the numbers illuminate anything.

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That was the jam back in the day. Yes, I’m an old fart. If your head is bobbing front to back right now, salud. For those of you shaking your head from side to side, with the frown making you look like a clown….I kid. It’s an older song, so many may not have had the pleasure of experiencing it. No prob, but I know everyone is familiar with Will Smith, aka The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, aka Mr. Bad Boy, aka Mr. Independence Day, aka Mr. Man in Black, aka Mr. Enemy of the State, aka….woooo saaaaah, wooooo saaaaah. Mr. I’ve grossed $100 million in eight straight movies, Mr. I’m the most powerful actor in Hollywood…..Translation: Will Smith is/has/and will continue to be straight fire. No different than what Will Smith of the Los Angeles Dodgers is doing. You know we hate talking about catchers here at Razzball, but 12 homers in 28 games needs to be addressed. I was shocked to see that he was 0% owned on the Razzball Player Rater. Can it continue and is he worth the pickup?

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Every time I’ve opened the Twitter machine this month, there was a particular Cincinnati Reds player hitting a home run. Fine, I lied, as I scroll through Twitter constantly and said player only hit 11 home runs. IN 18 GAMES!!! Babe Ruth began his professional baseball career in 1914. After three seasons, in which he played 166 games and accrued 405 plate appearances, the Bambino hit a total of 9 homers. Let’s just leave him with his candy bar, shall we? Because there’s a new Bambino in town, and his name is Aristides Aquino. He’s obviously not going to maintain this ridiculous pace and hit another 20 homers to finish the year, but how bad will the regression be?

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