Everyone in the baseball world is keeping at least one eye on the postseason, and everyone has the same question: is A.J. Pierzynski likable now? He looks like a nice dude, no?
Maybe that’s just me.
Humans are definitely wondering about bat flips and unwritten rules, though. Especially Grey, who wanted me to delete all Braves from the list because that organization is the worst thing that’s happened to baseball since Grey touted Rudy’s Tout Wars success on Twitter.
Take heart, though, baseball fans. No matter how many bats get flipped this Fall, I’ll be here talking about all the good players our future selves can enjoy (unless they flip bats).
I missed out on Julio Urias in all of my leagues. Shame because I was just looking at his stats the other day — 9.8 K/9, 1.8 BB/9, 1.10 ERA and I was like, “Those can’t be real,” and he winked at me. An interminable wink. And I was like, “Are you winking that those stats are real or are you winking at me that they’re not?” He didn’t answer, he just kept winking. So, I tried to pull a fast one on him and was like, “Wink once if I should wait to pick you up, wink twice if I should pick you up now or wink three times if you’re going to be called up to be a middle reliever.” And he winked once. Again. Then, like I do at Madame Tussauds Wax Museum, I climbed onto his head and blew into his eye to see if he was alive. He wasn’t. I mean, he is, but this was just a picture of him. Don’t be like me, don’t worry about the wink test with Urias and just grab him in all leagues. He could be a number one starter for the time he’s in the rotation. That’s the catch, however. (Or is it pitch?) He’s filling in for Alex Wood, who has triceps tightness. Wood could be out the rest of the season (not saying he is) and Urias would still not stay in the rotation. The Dodgers have said they will limit Urias’s innings. He could only pitch 60 more innings this year, which is about ten starts. My guess is he’ll pitch a few starts in the rotation, then move to the bullpen and pitch an inning or three a week. Sound about right to you, Urias? Wink once for yes…. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Yesterday, Buster Olney tweeted, “Kevin Gausman is pitching tonight probably exactly the way the Orioles hoped on the day they drafted him. Dominant stuff.” Putting aside the unnecessary “probably” — you’ll never win a Twitter Pulitzer with needless hooha! — is this what the Orioles hoped for? Because it’s felt at times like the Orioles were waiting for Gausman to say some sort of secret oath to let him into the rotation and, without Podrick to prompt him, he didn’t know said oath. By the by, I can’t look at Brienne of Tarth and not see Conan O’Brien. Perhaps, it’s me (it’s not). If the Orioles wanted Gausman to pitch probably exactly like this, wouldn’t they have put him in the rotation and left him alone for the last *covers mouth* years? Not to answer, but to knowingly nod while you undress your computer with your eyes. Since I have shares in that facacta noodle-hanger Archer, I watched the better part of Gausman’s start, and he looked better than what the boxscore says, and the boxscore says, “Yum, choco-latte.” It also says 5 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks in his first start back. Gausman has the stuff to be a number one, but at worse a number two. Not saying he will be this year; that’s just his stuff. He probably exactly should be already, but probably exactly hasn’t been. Still, I would grab him in any leagues where I needed upside. A 8+ K/9, 2.7+ BB/9, 3.75 ERA starter is probably exactly what you’ll get. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Philly fans are often singled out for their rude, obnoxious behavior, but yesterday, as the Mets hit six home runs, the Philly fans were attempting to be on their best behavior. Here’s a few of the more polite things heard, “Excuse me, sir, are you using the batteries in your portable radio? I’d like to throw them at someone’s shoulder. No, not their head. That would be rude.” Also heard, “I hate to waste a cheesesteak, but I’d like to vomit on an unsuspecting Mets fan.” “Jimmy, no, vomit on a suspecting Mets fan.” “Yeah, you’re right, Marge.” Finally, “These Mets are fun to watch, I get to try out new curse words — screw you, nut sock!” Then, with a pleased smile, “See, it’s like sack, but sock. Catchy, no?” Philly fans had all kinds of reasons to be annoyed yesterday as the Mets did damage. Yoenis Cespedes hit his 4th homer (1-for-3, 2 runs, 3 RBIs). Driving to the park in a limited edition car made of guano and Play-Doh must be his good luck charm! Michael Conforto hit his 2nd homer (2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs) as he hit third until he was pinch hit for against a lefty later in the game. I get that Conforto’s a lefty and it’s a matchup thing, but there’s gotta be some kind of unspoken rule. The guy you bat third in your lineup is not a platoon player. That’s Connie Mack to Earl Weaver to Coach Taylor rock solid coach stuff. You don’t pinch hit your three hole hitter! Then Neil Walker hit his 5th and 6th homers (2-for-5), with two homers in the past two days, and, honestly, truthfully, interruptingly, when you have six homers in 13 games, there weren’t a whole lot of games where you didn’t homer. Finally, Lucas Duda hit his 2nd homer (1-for-5, 2 RBIs), and 2nd in as many days. The Phillies starters really aren’t that bad. Dot dot dot. Compared to their relievers. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Glen Perkins hit the DL with a shoulder strain. Or, for those of you who have Siri read these posts to them, “Sorry, Grey, there’s no set closers in the Minnesota area, would you like to open up your search to waivers?” Thanks, Siri, I would. “Googling theater times for The Wood.” Ugh, Siri. True Story Alert! Because my pronunciation on everything is fudged up worse than See’s Candy. I tried having Siri call a friend of mine when I was pulling up to their house to pick them up, and Siri came back with, “Calling Israeli consulate to tell them you’re outside waiting.” I then immediately pulled over to stop a call that sounds like it would be flagged by the NSA. So, Perkins’s situation is hairier than a merkins’ situation; Kevin Jepsen should be the first go-to guy in the pen, but he’s no guarantee. Everyone is in play for the Twins’ job, Jepsen, Trevor May, Fernando Abad, Casey Fien and Ryan Pressly. Jepsen has experience, May has stuff, Fernando is a Abad righty, but an okay lefty for situational saves, Fien is not F-I-N-E and Pressly is the closer if everyone else leaves the building. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
And so it begins, the 2016 season. With three games on the slate today and another 12 on Monday, baseball is upon us. With the beginning of the season also comes clarity as to who’s making the cut for the 25 man roster. Coming out of every spring it’s important to take a moment and assess what players have seen an uptick in value heading into your dynasty league season. These are all players that are on my short list of targets in trades, those that could bring immediate returns in leagues this year. For the most part we’re discussing players that won’t cost you premium dollars to acquire. Some I’ve beaten to death over the last few weeks and others are popping up here for the first time. All in all the goal is to get you thinking about some potential breakout candidates to swoop on. Feel free to share some of your own.
When it comes to rookies we all known the top 100 prospects, and the guys outside the rankings with all the helium, but more often than not it’s the unheralded prospects that can make all the difference in deeper leagues and dynasty’s. Ask the 2014 Charlie Blackmon owner, the 2015 Delino Deshields owner, or the guy that picked up Travis Shaw down the stretch. They’ll tell you that when everyone else was blinded by minor leagues stats, or top 100 hyperboles, they took a shot on a guy who had something more important than hype; playing time. When it comes down to it, no matter the format, or scoring system everything starts and ends with playing time opportunity. So, with that said, for the next two posts I’m going to take a look at players that have a chance of breaking camp with their clubs, and reaping the benefits of that most important thing. Today we focus on the hitters and Wednesday we’ll move onto the pitchers. These won’t be your heralded guys like A.J. Reed or Jose Peraza, but those less sexy “rooks” that toe the line of JAG, and sleeper. Behold, Dr. Lifshitz’s Sleeper Rookies for 2016 Fantasy Baseball!
It’s going to be a tough act to follow for the rookies of 2016. After the “Year of the Rookie” in 2015, what can we expect from the freshman class this year? Will we have another deep class featuring numerous high impact players to fill our fantasy squads? Or will we scale back this year, and only have a few true must own froshes? Below we’ll dive into the high impact rookies to target in drafts, and keep an eye on for later season call ups. For these reasons, I’ve broken them into two tiers; those that should break camp with big league club, and those that should be high impact call ups during the season. Just for fun I’ve added top 5 lists from some of your favorite Razzball personalities to give you idea of what others besides myself are thinking. Enjoy!
*balloons fall from the ceiling, sirens go off* Oh my God, what did I win? Little ol’ me was the winner of the “Only Person To Put Dustin Garneau In A Headline?!” *more sirens, more balloons* I’m also the winner of the first person ever to mention Dustin Garneau in a lede?! *yet more balloons, yet more sirens* Okay, what is it now? I’m the first person to mention Dustin Garneau three times in one lede? Great, can we kill the sirens? My neighbors are gonna get annoyed. What do I win anyway? Dustin Garneau on my fantasy team? That’s the worst prize ever! So, I took on the monsters of the industry in an NL Only league that was hosted by Scott White at CBS and I came away with a team that is more imbalanced than Amanda Bynes. This league is deep so hold onto ye old hat. (If you want a shallower league, play against me and hundreds of your closest buddies in the Razzball Commenter Leagues.) Anyway, here’s my 12-team NL-Only team and some thoughts:
Welcome to the 2016 Razzball Team Previews! You’ll find everything you need to know about each team to get yourself ready for the upcoming fantasy baseball season. And I mean everything, folks. We’ve got line-ups, charts, Slurpees, lube, a guide for beginner electricians, and even a cactus! Well, that’s a lie. That’s what Jay had last year sitting in front of him. This year? Um…a little less lube? Take that as you will. But hey, we’ve got teams to preview and questions to ask, so let’s hop to it. We a very special guest for this post…Brad Rowland, to provide his take on what the team has in store this season. Now enough rambling, let’s see what 2016 holds for the Atlanta Braves!