Since the Jays were calling up Vladimir Guerrero Jr. today, the Nationals and Angels thought it was a good idea to drop their own sizzle in low-key fashion like wearing an Elmo doll at the Met Gala. If Carter Kieboom is Barbara Hershey to Vladimir Guerrero Jr.’s Bette Midler, then who is Luis Rengifo? That jerk husband of Barbara Hershey’s who held her back all of those years? Bette’s giant Marmaduke? Is it embarrassing that I know Beaches by heart? Not at all! According to Prospect Mike, Carter Kieboom’s outlook is, “Kieboom is a plus-hit/plus-power shortstop who split time between High-A and Double-A in 2018. His numbers dipped in the more advanced league, but he still hit .260 with five homers. 15-20 homers is a realistic power ceiling and he won’t sell out for it, meaning a decent average as well. I’ve also become a decent dart-thrower practicing on a picture of Grey.” What the eff, my dude? Carter doesn’t have great speed, which is a bit of a bummer since that always translates, but he could hit for power and average as a middle infidel. Hopefully, this means the end of days for Brian Dozier. Remember, this is the team that promoted and played Juan Soto last year. Mean’s while, the Angels called up Luis Rengifo. Doesn’t his last name look like an acronym of an obscenity on social media? “You really think Killary would’ve been better? RENGIFO, grandma!” The biggest question for me with Rengifo is Brad Assmunch. Does he even know what he has? I highly doubt it. Watch him play La Stella over Rengifo. Here’s what Prospect Mike said, “Rengifo can hit from both sides and he can basically play anywhere on the field. There’s also just enough power to make him really interesting if he sticks in the middle infield. He’ll probably get written off as a super-utility player, but he has a disciplined approach (75 walks, 75 strikeouts across three levels). Oh, and he swiped 41 bags this year to go along with seven homers and a .299 batting average. I know you’re not supposed to scout stat lines…but damn, that’s almost as sexy as the thought of Grey being run over by a car.” C’mon! Rengifo and Kieboom’s projections are both at the Prospectonator. They’re, hmm, how do I put this? Interesting. Surprised to see Rengifo ranked above Kieboom for projections. Think I’d go the other way with them, but they are slightly different, based on needs. I do know I needs me some upside and added them in multiple leagues. ALL ABOARD THE UPSIDE TRAIN! Chugga-chugga Shin-Soo Choo! Chugga-chugga Shin-Soo Choo! Chugga-chugga Shin-Soo Choo! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Please see our player page for Leonys Martin to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
As Ice Cube sang on the now-iconic song, It Was An Away Game, “Just waking up in the morning gotta thank God. Today, German was away, carrying my whole squad.” Then later on, he sings, “I felt ill after that big fat DeSclafani, pitching like he just pulled out of bed in jammies, but German killed those baserunners like every role by Allison Janney. And my teams run deep so deep so deep I’d put your ass to sleep talking about how on one team Alex Cobb’s my number one, but I didn’t hesitate to call German Marquez my top gun.” Imagine you were a Rockies fan who only watched home games, the team’s contract with German Marquez (9 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 0 walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 2.00) would be tré confusing. After 100 pitches, he is so low effort throwing 97 MPH in the 9th inning, and occasionally drops in an off-the-table curve that is freaking brothers every way like M.J. I can’t believe today German’s game was away. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’m going to share a Missed Connection posting with you that I’ve been working on; let me know if there’s anything you’d change. “Hello, Ginger. I saw you at a Wetzel’s Pretzels in Roosevelt Field on Saturday. I don’t know if Ginger is your name, but your hair was the color of a carrot. Not a carrot’s top, that’s green. I don’t know why people say that’s orange. You looked off the scale on the crazy/hot ratio. Your arm freckles looked like God spilled Sunny D on you. One blonde child turned the corner, saw you and immediately started crying. Does any of this ring a bell? At one point, you stepped into a sliver of sunlight and starting screaming, ‘I’m burning!’ You were wearing a New York Yankees jersey with the name Frazier on the back. If this sounds like you, please contact me. I need an outfielder.” How’s that? Do you think I could get myself a 5th outfielder with that? So, Clint Frazier finds himself in an everyday job with the Yankees. How long he lasts is up to Giancarlo, Hicks and Gardner’s health, but I’d own Frazier everywhere to see if he can finally tap that speed/power combo. Speaking of which, he kinda looks like Pizza Combos. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
There was once a planet called *hris Davis that was all powerful, but had issues with contact so nobody knew about it. Power split the planet in two.
Khris Davis, “You, the light side of the planet, me the dark side, but I vacuumed up all your power to combine into my own and now I have all the power.”
Chris Davis, “How could you!”
Khris, “Well, you stumbled into my lair, after going 0-for-52 trying to open the door. Should you get your eyes checked? I ask as a concerned villain.”
Chris, “You stole my power, Khris with a K!”
Khris, “Tut-tut-tut, Chris with a C. It’s K-HR-ris! Muahahahaha…” Sips from a Capri Sun, then continues, “…hahahahahahaha…” Coughs a bit, ending his evil laugh, then adds a final sting, “Now you are as useful as that Qhris Davis meteroid playing for the Marlins’ Double-A team.” Yesterday, Khris Davis (2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 8th and 9th homer, hitting .266) continued his barrage on baseballs, while Chris Davis (0-for-3, 1 run, hitting .000) continued his barrage on hitting. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Opens an envelope, and, inside, is an invitation. “Wow, what gorgeous calligraphy. Someone took their calligraphy class at 8 PM every Wednesday for six weeks at a local college very seriously. Patrick Bateman would be jealous of that raised font.” Reading, “Please join us, the Tampa Bay Rays, for the Star Mitzvah of Austin Meadows. On Tuesday, the ninth of April, two thousand and nineteen at twenty-four minutes after two o’clock in the afternoon at Temple Fantasy Tova Those Other Outfielders. A reception to follow at one of the 37 local Hooter’s restaurants in the Tampa area. Rather than gifts, please bring Cash. Our manager, he gets lost.” How sweet is that. I wonder if I was invited because I wrote an Austin Meadows sleeper this preseason. Prolly. Sound the shofar, Meadows is finally breaking out! *remains super calm, then screams* I TOLD YOU! Yesterday, Austin Meadows went 4-for-5, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and a slam (3) and legs (2), hitting .308. Hopefully, this is the start of the big things I imagine for him, and, finally, he becomes a man. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Do you ever get the urge to sip on some syrup, Super Troopers style? Maybe is just me or I’m in the mood for breakfast. Whelp, we’re way off topic now, guess it’s time to bring up James Paxton, who is currently priced at $10,600 .“Big Maple” is one of the top options of the day at pitcher. He’s got more than enough talent to handle facing the O’s again for the second time in a week. Camden Yards favors power, but let’s trust in Paxton’s ability. I feel good about the Yankees offense backing him up a bit more and getting him a win with some good strikeout upside. Bring it on.
New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yesterday, Thomas Pannone took a no-hitter into the 7th inning of his 1st MLB start, and was the 5th pitcher since 1900 to go seven shutout innings with one or less hits and two or less walks, finishing with 7 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 2 walks, 3 Ks. More trivia? You got it! He sometimes goes by his stepfather’s Polish name, Pannonehits, or his mom’s Czech name, Panntwowalks. Coincidence? Pannone says puh-no-way! He has disavowed his biological Italian father, Panettone. That guy is a real fruitcake. Haha, we had some good laughs, huh? I’m going to take a nap now. *shuts eyes standing up* I can hear you tiptoeing behind me. So, wasn’t able to find a ton on Pannone on site. Our Prospect-o-Nator that has projections for all rookies doesn’t hate Pannone. Yes, it projects him for 4.98 ERA, but, trust me, with rookies, that’s not awful. He’s not listed on any major Jays’ prospect lists likely because he throws 89 MPH. Woof, and let the dog out so it can woof-woof. For now, I’d look at him as a streamer. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hello, I am Hunter Renfroe. I have homered in four straight games. I am also your father that is why I play for the Padres. Please, call me daddy. Not sure why I’m talking like a robot. Elon Musk has bought my body and repurposed my soul. By the by, you know what’s fun to do, next time you’re in a quiet place where people will be able to hear your phone, have Siri say, “You’re the reason the robots take over the world in the future.” And have Siri keep saying it while you look at the person next to you, then finally say to your phone, “Me or this guy?” Any hoo! Hunter Renfroe (2-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 12th homer) sent the Padres into the Space Force! He has power (still makes no sense he’s hitting third, don’t care what he’s done), and I’d grab him if you need that. Him and Franmil Reyes (3-for-5, 2 runs and his 9th homer, and third homer in four games) have put on a show these last few days. Not sure why they’d hit the Brewers hard, they just traded for Jonathan Schoop. He’s a good pitcher, right? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Rick Porcello was masterful Friday night, turning in one of the best, most efficient, pitching performances we’ll see all season, holding the New York Yankees to just one hit (a home run) and striking out nine for a complete game win. His only hiccups were a HBP to begin the game and a solo home run to rookie 3rd baseman Miguel Andujar, after which Porcello proceeded to retire the next 21 straight batters with ease. More like Siiiiick Rick, brah *shock emoji* Or Quick Rick? IMHO (the “H” stands for handsome) this was the best start we’ve seen from a Boston pitcher all season, and that’s saying something for a team with Chris Sale on it. The former Cy Young threw first-pitch strikes to 23 batters and threw 68 strikes of the the just 86 pitches to get through this one. Veintidos, which might be the worst nickname ever, moves to 14-4 with a 3.84 ERA and 1.16 WHIP. Most amazing for me, however, was that a Yankees/Red Sox game took just 2 hours and 15 minutes! It was the fastest Boston/NY game since May 6, 1994! So keeping in that spirit I will wrap this up quick. The last two Sox pitchers to 1-hit the mighty Yankees line up facing the minimum batters were Pedro Martinez in 1999 and Roger Clemens in 1991, and those are some pretty great names to have in your company.
Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I watch all trading deadline deals like I’m watching Hereditary. Hands firmly pressed over my eyes, occasionally I’ll peek out. See a Jon Heyman tweet coming and prepare to scream. Then a long exhale. “Ah, thank God, it’s not a player I own nor does it affect any of my other guys.” Then, out of nowhere, Brian Dozier gets traded to the Dodgers and my head goes into a tailspin like it’s a WHOMP on the old Batman TV show. “But what about Max Muncy? Can Chris Taylor still play? What about Kiké?! Please tell me Kiké’s still in PLAY!” Then I take 150 milligrams of Percocet and go to the park to watch pre-teens and all of their innocence. In my head, I scream to them, “You’ll never know my pain!” And smile lopsidedly until another adult asks me to leave. So, the Dodgers are now fielding the NL All-Star team from now until October. Dozier will likely slot into the two or three hole and I still like him for a huge 2nd half. Max Muncy and Chris Taylor are not likely going to be as fortunate, as I have no idea where the Dodgers can play all of these guys. If you’ve been burned by the trade deadline, I will smile lopsidedly and creep out someone for you. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?