There’s nothing better than an April Fools’ prank that is so sly it’s barely perceptible as a prank.  You don’t even know if it’s a gag.  One year, I had a sound engineer friend make a recording that said, “This call is being recorded.  A copy of that recording is available automatically to the police and the prosecutors.”  Then used that to call my mom and tell her I was in jail for accidentally running down a family of four.  “But mom the light was yellow!”  Apparently, I overestimated how funny she’d find that phone call, and twelve years later, she still calls me the night before April Fools’ to remind me not to pull any pranks on her.  This year the best prank I saw was one done by Major League Baseball.  It was so slight, if you blinked you’d miss it.  For their prank, they scheduled a half day on a Sunday.  Since 1908, MLB has played a full schedule of games on Sunday.  What a great joke!  Well done, MLB.  But, seriously, this is a joke, right?  Any hoo!  Know what’s not a joke, the love Trevor Williams has for Razzball, apparently:

Yesterday, Williams wasted no time to prove to me that his love for us is as strong as my love for him.  He went 6 IP, 0 ER with zero hits, but he failed to locate as well, and walked five guys, while racking up only one strikeout.  I believe his love for Razzball is only growing so this is just the beginning of great things to come.  Notice spelling of ‘come,’ you sickos.  On the reals, I like Williams for this year, and wrote a Trevor Williams sleeper for him this preseason.  Anyway, here’s what I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Starling Marte – 1-for-3 in the 1st game, and 1-for-4, 2 runs with a slam (1) & legs (1) in the 2nd game.  Dilly! Dilly!

David Freese – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer.  Freese should change his last name to, “Stop, collaborate and listen.”

Felipe Rivero – 2 IP, 0 ER, 5 Ks and two saves.  Felipe Rivero was mad:

Michael Fulmer – 8 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 3 Ks.  Okay, okay, but how about Trevor Williams?!  Well, they all can’t be TW-Yay, but Fulmer has a great next matchup on the Stream-o-Nator.

Delino DeShields – Has a broken hamate bone.

Joey Gallo – 2-for-4 and his 1st homer.  Statcast said the home run travelled real far and left the park super fast.  Man, Statcast is getting lazy this year!

Mike Minor – 4 2/3 IP, 2 ER.  Keep going that deep into games, Minor, and you could have a job starting for the Rays.

Lance McCullers – 5 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 10 Ks.  He was able to beat back the Rangers in a battle of Texas.  This is the only battle of Texas I can think of.  Feel like I’m forgetting a Texas battle though.

Gerrit Cole – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 11 Ks.  Whenever Cole looks good, my first thought is, “Don’t worry, he’ll disappoint at some point.”

Ian Kinsler – Hit the DL with a groin strain.  Watch out, Kinsler, or you will go blind.

Ryan SchimpfAngels acquired him from the Braves for Carlos Perez.  If a trade happens but no one cares, is it still a trade?  Damn, Plato up in here!  RIP Dana Plato.

Shohei Ohtani – 6 IP, 3 ER, 4 baserunners, 6 Ks.  Ralph Lifshitz will be along later today with an Ohtani pitching profile.  You can hardly wait.  No, you!

Blake Parker – 1/3 IP, 1 ER and the crazy fast hook from The Sciosciapath to remove Parker.  “Hey, Parker, park it on the bench!”  That’s me with a mouth full of chewing tobacco.  Coming in for the save was Keynan Middleton (2/3 IP, 0 ER), who I grabbed two days ago in one league because Oaktown Steve has been pushing him for a minute.  That’s an Urban Dictionary minute, by the way, which is a long time.  I do think Parker is on the hot seat.  “Hey, Parker, maybe you don’t park it on top of a hot ember!”  But Middleton isn’t necessarily the answer.  He could be, but Cam Bedrosian was already used in the 7th inning yesterday, then again the 7th inning isn’t confidence building either.  For the next save, the Sciosciapath could go with any of the above to spite Montgomery Brewster.

Matt Chapman – 1-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 1st homer.  April 22nd, that’s the target date for Chapman to be hitting homers from the five hole in the lineup.

Aaron Hicks – Hit the DL because:  Aaron Hicks.  His replacement, Billy McKinney, hit the DL the next day because Aaron Hicks infected him.  Then the Yankees called up, Miguel Andujar.  Stay away from Aaron Hicks, he’s the contagion!  I own Andujar in one deeper league, but obviously we need to see playing time before going crazy.  I would likely grab him in all leagues, just in case, he plays every day, and hits.  Yesterday, he went 0-for-4.

Sonny Gray – 4 IP, 1 ER, 10 baserunners, 8 Ks.  Sonny Gray had a sunny and grey line.  What kind of idiot has an oxymoronic name anyway.

Kevin Pillar – 3-for-4, 1 run and three steals on Saturday.  If we can just get Gibbons to stop scratching his butt, and move Pillar up to leadoff.  Either way, Pillar’s a hot schmotato!

Justin Smoak – 3-for-4, 6 RBIs and his 1st and 2nd homer.  Smoak!  Evidently, the spirit wasn’t the only holy thing yesterday.

Adam Eaton – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs with his 2nd homer, and went 5-for-5 with his 1st homer on Saturday.  It’s “chewing up the scenery,” but Eaton works.

Bryce Harper – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 1st and 2nd homer.  He’s on pace for 121 homers.  LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL–Oh, wait, that seems possible with Commissioner Manfred’s bouncy balls.

Anthony Rendon – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer.  Not bad, even though he’s Goldilocks’ing Trea Turner’s bed.

Daniel Murphy – Took grounders on Sunday.  Where did he take them?  Hmm.

Gio Gonzalez – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks.  But that xFIP’s gonna catch up to him, amiright?

Sal Romano – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 2 Ks.  Not bad for a type of cheese.

Jake Faria – 4 IP, 1 ER.  Can I just do a blanket reversal on anything nice I’ve ever said about the Rays starters for as long as they’re in a four-man rotation?

Carlos Carrasco – 5 2/3 IP, 5 ER vs. James Paxton – 4 2/3 IP, 6 ER.  This matchup was billed as, “I can’t believe how excited I was to own both of these guys a week ago.”

Trevor Bauer – 5 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks.  Who’s the greatest pitcher of all-time?!  Hmm, gotta say Sandy Koufax, being a Jew and all, but Bauer with the decent effort on Sunday.

Edwin Encarnacion – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 1st and 2nd homer.  The only thing in question is whether he’ll hit 35, 36, 37 or 38 homers this year.

Mitch Haniger – 1-for-2, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer.  At least someone on my RCL team is hitting bombs.  Yes, this is all about me!

Dee Gordon – 1-for-4 and his 1st homer.  Damn, back on the PEDs already?!

Kyle Gibson – 6 IP, 0 ER, 0 Hits, 5 Walks, 6 Ks.   Following Gibson was Pressly, not sure if he was introduced by Ed Sullivan.  Obviously, no hits is a great sign, but five walks is less so.  I’ve put Gibson on my watch list to see if he can find command with his no-hit stuff.  My guess is I’ll just spend ten minutes trying to figure out how to take Gibson off my watch list, then I’ll give up, and he’ll be watched all year.

Jose Berrios – 9 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 6 Ks.  Berrios pitches so well against the Orioles that they might offer him a contract two Marches from now with a 40% chance he passes the physical.

Brian Dozier – 2-for-5 and his 1st and 2nd homer.  Wow, and it’s not even the 2nd half yet.

Miguel Sano – 1-for-5 and his 2nd homer, homering in back-to-back games.  Still early but one of my biggest regrets is not getting Sano anywhere.  He was going so late in drafts due to possible #metoo ramifications, but I was never able to pull the trigger.  From what I hear, pulling the trigger is what gets one in #metoo complications.

Eduardo Escobar – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs.  Likely available in shallower leagues, and, with Jorge Polanco in the basement with Bubbles trying to get clean for 80 games, Escobar is a solid add.

Kevin Gausman – 4 IP, 6 ER.  Aight, but just wait until he pitches in August!

Christian Yelich – 5-for-5, 3 runs, 2 RBIs, as Ryan Braun was benched.  Okay, Braun has nothing to do with Yelich, but Braun is integral, essential, thesaurus to my fantasy teams, so excuuuuuuuse me.  Did you hear this rumor this weekend that the Brewers were trading Braun for Kemp?  That’s helpful to no one.

Joakim Soria – 1 IP, 0 ER and the save.  Some people seemed surprised Soria closed out Saturday’s game, but I always assumed he was the closer.  Maybe those other people thought I was Joakim.

Lucas Giolito – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners (4 BBs), 1 K.  Yeah, Quality Start, right.

Kenta Maeda – 5 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 10 Ks.  Appizzarently, Maeda was not the guy I should’ve dropped off my RCL team.  Point *pinkie to mouth* Maeda.

Cody Bellinger – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer.  Bellinger 1, Judge 0!  Okay, I prolly shouldn’t do that, because it may not be a game Bellinger can win, and we want to set him up for success.

Rich Hill – 6 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks.    After the game, Hill said, “How’s dem beans?”

Chris Stratton – 5 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks.  Not exactly butta, but against the Dodgers, I’ll take it, assuming against the Padres home/away and Rockies and Diamondbacks at home it is a bit more butta.  I just want that spreadable goodness.

Yasmany Tomas – Was placed on waivers.  Then the Diamondbacks pulled their team bus to the side of the road, threw a bag of sweet plantains into a roadside ditch, waited until Yasmany ran after the plantains and drove away.  Hopefully Yasmany lands on an AL team that could use a DH.  B[ioqb11&–Sorry, my fingers are crossed.

Zack Greinke – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 9 Ks.  Looks like Greinke’s healthy again.  From the neck down at least.

Charlie Blackmon – 2-for-4 and his 2nd and 3rd homer.  Who said Blackmon can’t hit for power again?  Seriously who said it, because I wanna check them for racism.  I have a racism decoder ring.

Vince Velasquez – 2 2/3 IP, 4 ER.  Though, he kept his pitch count to 69.  Nice.

Michael Wacha – 4 2/3 IP, 4 ER.  Wacha Wacha Whatta.

Paul DeJong – 2-for-3 and his 1st and 2nd homer.  A double dip of JeDong!

Yadier Molina – 1-for-5 and his 2nd homer.  When you think he’s done, he just keeps going.  Guess it’s appropriate that baseball’s Energizer Bunny would do something on Easter.

Jacob deGrom – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks.  So far it hasn’t bit you in the ass by prenaming your fantasy team, Flawless and deGromit.

Brandon Nimmo – Out with the flu.  Guess he was sneezing, I thought he was ordering a Givenchy handbag.

Michael Conforto – Traveling with the team, and sounds to be headed for activation on Thursday.  Unless he’s traveling with the team to keep an eye on Matt Harvey, and make sure he doesn’t sleep with his wife.

J.T. Realmuto – Expected out for three weeks.  Sounds like Jerry Tomato Realmuto will be tossing salad for the next few weeks.  In the most non-pornographic way possible.  The no-hitting, Chad Wallach will be filling in for him.

Brad Ziegler – 1 2/3 IP, 4 ER on Saturday.  Kazaam!

Dillon Peters – 6 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 2 Ks.  He’s a low strikeout, solid command guy that I’d struggle to grab in an NL-Only league, i.e., Dillon McOkay.

Yu Darvish – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER.  Hey, Darvish, it was vs. the Marlins, so it definitely wasn’t the playoffs.

Jose Quintana – 6 IP, 6 ER.  Cubs starters need to be careful in South Florida right now.  Miami is being very antagonistic.  First, Miami brought in a Castro, then they promoted a Chad.  Wait until they bring up Double-A pitcher, Johnny Versacekiller.

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Crazy J
Crazy J
4 years ago

Jake Junis was an interesting streamer last season. This Jakob Junis seems even better!

ROTO OVERLORD
ROTO OVERLORD
4 years ago

@ROTO OVERLORD: panik or simmons ROS

Donny Simms
Donny Simms
4 years ago

New to fantasy baseball, just looking for a general idea of what I need to strengthen on my team, as I am currently getting smoked by all teams lol

8 team – h2h – points –

C- w. Ramos
1- bellinger
2. Dee Gordon
3 Machado
SS turner
1/3 Rendon
2/ss c Taylor
OF Stanton
OF buxton
OF Yoenis Cespedes
OF b Hamilton
OF mazara
Bench – inciarte, m Taylor

P Yu Darvish
P Nola
P Bauer
P McCullers
P L Castillo
P Boxberger
P treina
P neris
P Kela
P a miller

ROTO OVERLORD
ROTO OVERLORD
4 years ago

Chapman or Franco ROS

ROTO OVERLORD
ROTO OVERLORD
Reply to  ROTO OVERLORD
4 years ago

@ROTO OVERLORD: panik or simmons ROS

Alex
Alex
4 years ago

Reynaldo Lopez looks good might drop Gausman for him since streamonator loves his next start

LeftCoastYankee
LeftCoastYankee
4 years ago

Would you drop David Robertson for flyer like Trevor Williams in a standard 5×5 league?
If not T-Dubs, what some other high risk/high reward SPs you recommend?

WinterIsComing
WinterIsComing
4 years ago

Hey Grey as my backup 3B in 10 man h2h points I picked up Davidson and dropped Franco. Currently Matt Chapman, jp Crawford, Todd Frazier, Dietrich and Anderson (both Mia) are all available as well. Holding Davidson or rolling the dice on one of the others? It was basically the last pick of my draft so it’s not going to kill me if it doesn’t work out back up plan is to just wait for Senzel to get the call since it’s keeper league. Thanks Grey

ROTO OVERLORD
ROTO OVERLORD
4 years ago

Longoria or Chapman ROS

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
4 years ago

First game of the year I’ve had a catcher start (thanks Zunino) and Wellington goes beef twice. Love that guy.

I'm Keith Hernandez
I'm Keith Hernandez
4 years ago

12 team Roto 6×6 (BB and HDS) How do you like this team?
Boxburger is on the wire (we use weekly bids that close Sunday) Drop anyone for him and bid how much ($200 for the year)

C Chris Iannetta, Col C S
1B Freddie Freeman, Atl 1B
2B Chris Taylor, LAD 2B, OF
3B Kris Bryant, ChC 3B
SS Jean Segura, Sea SS
2B/SS Tim Anderson, CWS SS
1B/3B Anthony Rendon, Wsh 3B
OF Marcell Ozuna, StL OF
OF Lorenzo Cain, Mil OF
OF Jose Martinez, StL 1B, OF
OF Michael A. Taylor, Wsh OF
UTIL Shin-Soo Choo, Tex OF, DH S
P Alex Wood, LAD SP
P Blake Treinen, Oak RP
P Charlie Morton, Hou SP
P Chris Devenski, Hou RP
P Chad Green, NYY RP
P Patrick Corbin, Ari SP
P Juan Nicasio, Sea RP
SP Yu Darvish, ChC SP
RP Raisel Iglesias, Cin RP
Bench Shohei Ohtani, LAA SP, DH
Bench Sonny Gray, NYY SP

Alex
Alex
4 years ago

Drop Gausman to stream pitchers in a 16team H2H league. Have 8 starters currently

SwaggerJackers
SwaggerJackers
4 years ago

@Grey: Assuming Conforto comes back healthy this week, where does he rank overall in your OF list ROS?

Preseason you had him at 46 but mentioned he was 17 spots higher before the injury. So top 30 if healthy? That would put him around Mancini/Pham.

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  SwaggerJackers
4 years ago

@SwaggerJackers: I’ve got him too 20 with an injury risk caveat. Look at his numbers last year before the injury. MVP type numbers.

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
4 years ago

And Correa is hurt.
Why was I so excited for this season to begin?

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
Haha Seriously!
Add him to the long list of my pitchers getting slammed.
Crazy bad luck so far.

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
4 years ago

Newcomb was really staring Harper down after that homer. Might be some bean balls coming soon.

That Mahle stream worked out better than I could’ve hoped for. Sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good.

SwaggerJackers
SwaggerJackers
Reply to  Big Magoo
4 years ago

@Big Magoo: Magoo! Our OBP darling, Lucas Duda, is already hurt. Damn it!

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
4 years ago

Benintendi doesn’t have a batting average yet. He got a 2-0 fastball at 92 that got a lot of plate. He got another one on 2-1 and he fouled them both straight back. Boston just looks kind of sluggish in general.

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
Reply to  OaktownSteve
4 years ago

@OaktownSteve: JDM should help, but they’ve really missed that lefty, middle-of-the-order slugger since Ortiz retired

GrassyKnollRedding
GrassyKnollRedding
4 years ago

Class of Newcomb High was very lucky to escape that first inning with only one earned run.

GrassyKnollRedding
GrassyKnollRedding
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Umm… Don’t check the box score now, Grey. Don’t do it.

Cram it
Cram it
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: You started him???

Cram it
Cram it
4 years ago

We need to look into this Trevor Richards pitching for Miami. Impressive minor league numbers and looks good so far against Boston. And go!

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
Reply to  Cram it
4 years ago

@Cram it:

Average velocity on the FB but has a little late life to it. Seems to be able to locate it. Definitely working around the box. The slowmo showed what looked like a circle grip on the change. Supposed to be his best pitch. There’s good gap between the change and FB velocity. Some downward tumbling action and armside movement as is typical with the circle change. Looks like a change that will induce weak contact more than get any swing and miss. The breaking ball looks like a tight slider. Looks like it does have some late break deception. Could be a good pitch against right handers with chase issues. He’s got a few Ks in this game, but I doubt there’s much K upside in his game. He does look like he’s got an idea what he’s doing out there and not just throwing. The lack of a real plus plus swing and miss pitch will also mean he’s going to be a bit luck dependent. Could be worth grabbing in super super deep where SP is at a premium.

Cram it
Cram it
Reply to  OaktownSteve
4 years ago

@OaktownSteve: I’m not as enamored with big arms with straight fastballs. Dude looks like a pitcher, can control his pitches, move em around, keeping guys off balance. I’ll keep my eye on him. If Rick Porcello can be fantasy relevant…

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
Reply to  Cram it
4 years ago

@Cram it:

Yeah he looks like he can mix pitches, locate, stay competitive. Even without a big arm, it helps to be able to miss some bats with something. I see a lot of contact being inevitable. Seems worth keeping an eye on him, though. There’s something to work with.

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:

I bet he speaks with an obviously fake British accent.

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
4 years ago

The home plate ump in the Jays/White Sox game is a giant. He made Jose Abreu look like a little kid.

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:

I like Mahle. I own him in a keeper. His pitch mix is pretty complimentary. He seems to be able to use them all effectively. Humps it up at 95 when he needs to. Showed really good command in the minors. I read last year that when he came up he found the strike zone to be a lot smaller than in MiLB and his BB rate spiked. Looked really good today.

OaktownSteve
OaktownSteve
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:

I watched about three innings but I fell asleep periodically.

msh2404
msh2404
4 years ago

Drop one of Jose Martinez, Bour or Lomo?

Better option for saves: Ziegler, Soria, Claudio?

Semien, Peraza or Solarte for SS?

Thanks Grey

Peacecoast
Peacecoast
4 years ago

brinson or pillar ROS?

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
4 years ago

Need your advice Grey…would you give up Haniger and Sonny Gray for Ohtani?

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Just did it. Uh oh!

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: I’ll be good. Ohtani is a legit SP.

Fantasy Phein
Fantasy Phein
4 years ago

QS LGE. Back end starter who ya like mike minor, Trevor Williams, Skaggs?? Thx

Papa Jean Segura
Papa Jean Segura
4 years ago

1. Shane Greene or Barraclough for saves?

beardcrabs
beardcrabs
4 years ago

who you taking, Standard 12 team yahoo roto:

A: My Jean Segura for

B: Story and Margot/ or Kiermaier

C: There’s no C

D: My team’s light on speed

Primetime
Primetime
4 years ago

Grey, watching Tyler mahle straight deal vs Cubs. 6 k through 3. I’m ready to take a flier on this guy. You know anything on this kid?

When Buying Gifts Don't Confuse the Diary of Hans Frank and Anne Frank
When Buying Gifts Don't Confuse the Diary of Hans Frank and Anne Frank
4 years ago

20 team roto with QS. woodruff now used as a RP twice already. only need 1200 innings max here and woodruff is my #6 SP (we also start 5 RP). drop for either of gibson/stratton?

The Great Knoche
The Great Knoche
4 years ago

So much for that Zach Davies 2 start week going well.

At least we have another JeDong!

Old School Brother
Old School Brother
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: I dropped him on opening day for Tim Anderson #Gloops

aaron
aaron
4 years ago

Gray, i’ve used your Paul JeDONG nickname today over text with my buddies..thanks! he has so many 2 HR days, last year i just texted a photo of a double pronged dildo..DOUBLE DONG DEJONG. any other irritating DeJong texts after a HR i’m in…thanks!

Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
4 years ago

Easy way to my heart as a pitcher? Debut with tons of K, no walks, and pitch slap the other guy.

In other news, Taillon looked prettyyyy prettyyy great. Only 1 ER was his, the other was thanks to his reliever blowing the inherited runner. Anyway, this start looked very much like his spring stats.

Cram It
Cram It
Reply to  Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
4 years ago

@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: Though I watched briefly, he didn’t “look” impressive. Wouldn’t be shocked if he starts getting lit up when teams get a book on him or a second look.

Cram It
Cram It
Reply to  Cram It
4 years ago

@Cram It: Oh I was talking about Milosh, not Taillon.

Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Reply to  Cram It
4 years ago

@Cram It: you called it!

Still like the Ks, but tons of HR that he hopefully reins in….considering this start was against MIL in HR central, I’ll take it.

peacecoast
peacecoast
Reply to  Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
4 years ago

@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: he looked great! Drives me crazy when weak bullpens screw it all up. Wild pitch really?

Turd Fergusons
Turd Fergusons
4 years ago

First, we had Span and Revere. Now, I posit that Kiermaier and Pillar are the same person. They were lazy and kept the same first name for each identity!

Stumanji!
Stumanji!
4 years ago

Re: Trevor Williams: I mean I’ll take the QS, but no concerns over the fact that he threw more balls than strikes? Seems extremely lucky to get through that game unscathed with 5 BBs. 5.89 x FIP.

Cram It
Cram It
Reply to  Stumanji!
4 years ago

@Stumanji!: I think you should take what you can get with him and be happy. He wasn’t pegged to be a stud or anything. Just a guy who was going virtually undrafted who could be solid overall.

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
4 years ago

Dozier! Mr Underrated strikes again. This one was a cheapie, I’ll admit. Looked like a routine fly ball that somehow snuck inside the foul pole. It looks like a 450 footer on the stat sheet though.

Grabbed Tyler Mahle on a couple of teams as a cheap double-starter this week. Had a sub-2 BB/9 at just about each minor league level with just under a strikeout per inning. Generally did a good job at keeping the ball in the park too. Pretty risky, but I’m taking a shot. Please don’t destroy my ratios.

You forgot to mention the most impressive thing about the first few days of the season – Odor drew walks off of Verlander and Cole. Maybe there’s a glimmer of hope for him moving forward.

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Super small sample size, but he’s swinging less often so far. That approach could pay dividends later on.

GrassyKnollRedding
GrassyKnollRedding
Reply to  Big Magoo
4 years ago

@Big Magoo: Wow, you’ve got balls of steel starting Mahle against the Cubs, Magoo! Then again the Cubs haven’t been so Cubby lately. Gotta say the kid looks great so far, keeps poised and pitches out of trouble. Throwing filthy stuff.

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
Reply to  GrassyKnollRedding
4 years ago

@GrassyKnollRedding: I like the pedigree, raw stuff, and command. Actually liked his start in Pittsburgh later this week more than the one today, but the Cubs haven’t gotten going yet and have just travelled from Miami to Cincy. Pretty good spot. He does look sharp so far.

Cohen
Cohen
Reply to  Big Magoo
4 years ago

@Big Magoo: Magoo, any streamers u like this week?

Big Magoo
Big Magoo
Reply to  Cohen
4 years ago

@Cohen: At this point of the season, I’m still trying to identify the best teams to stream against and the ones to avoid. The Rays, Padres, Royals, Marlins, Orioles (away), and Giants look like some streamer-friendly opponents at the moment. Jordan Montgomery vs the Rays tomorrow is a good one. Most of the pitchers in the Rockies/Padres series at Petco look interesting. Marco Gonzales at San Fran is a somewhat risky, but sneaky stream in deeper leagues.

GrassyKnollRedding
GrassyKnollRedding
4 years ago

Mikolas with the Slam! I think the wrong pitcher from Japan is available as both a Pitcher and a Hitter…

peacecoast
peacecoast
4 years ago

mikolas for the win!

GregJeffries
GregJeffries
4 years ago

Great stuff, as always!

Would you grab VV or Skaggs ROS? And is it close?
Thanks!

peacecoast
peacecoast
4 years ago

I hate how if a reliever let’s a run score on a wild pitch it is still charged to the prior pitcher. Just happened to Taillon, marring an otherwise excellent line for the day.

peacecoast
peacecoast
Reply to  peacecoast
4 years ago

@peacecoast: and there goes my first W of the year, still waiting for it

Old School Brother
Old School Brother
4 years ago

Watched Gladiator last night for the first time in a long time, It’s apparent Game of Thrones ripped so much off of it

Terrible Ted
Terrible Ted
4 years ago

Have you considered doing a 24/7 chat box somewhere on the site where users can log in and shoot the shizz with each other? Kinda like those illegal websites one uses for streaming.

Swfcdan
Swfcdan
Reply to  Terrible Ted
4 years ago

@Terrible Ted: Anyone who watches illegal streams (who me? never!) knows that those chat boxes get EXTREMELY annoying and close them within minutes.

The Harrow
The Harrow
Reply to  Swfcdan
4 years ago

@Swfcdan: you guys get that you can read/respond to other people’s posts on here already right….

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
4 years ago

I’m feeling all star trekkie up in this bizzle.

CAAAAAAAAAIIIIN!

For where I took him, that dude might be my best pick so far. Hittin, stealin, slammin, leadin off..

He’s gettin biblical with this shiz, cuz Cain is Able!

(You can have that one for free)

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: as a Lynn owner I offer zero sympathy. It’s a dog eat dog world.

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: your boy Mikolas just went yard, uh, there’s that? Hahahaha

Old School Brother
Old School Brother
Reply to  Lucky Dog
4 years ago

@Lucky Dog: Lovin Lo Cain so far

Swfcdan
Swfcdan
Reply to  Lucky Dog
4 years ago

@Lucky Dog: Cain Sugar gettin it done

Not sure about Mikolas bat missing-ness, hard throwing but not seen much else.

Swfcdan
Swfcdan
Reply to  Lucky Dog
4 years ago

@Lucky Dog: Make him hit and pitch! Otani who?

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  Swfcdan
4 years ago

@Swfcdan: right? And why Othani & not the OG dual threat MadBum?

The way yahoo handled this was such a cluster.

When Buying Gifts Don't Confuse the Diary of Hans Frank and Anne Frank
When Buying Gifts Don't Confuse the Diary of Hans Frank and Anne Frank
4 years ago

hits and OPS added 16 teamer. 2 utils. have franco as my worst hitter i have one BN hitter. hold or grab any of: thames (dropped recently), dietrich, sparkakis, duffy, chisenhall. rest of hitters look like this:
C chirinos
1B goldy
2B nunez (SS, 3B, OF)
SS segura
3B torenado
OF (3) pollock, puig, gallo (1B/3B)
util (2) choo, peraza (2B/SS)
BN franco
NA (1) senzel

Swfcdan
Swfcdan
4 years ago

Help me out here. What’s worse: Joe Kelly’s tan, or K Middleton’s hair?

Bananafactory
Bananafactory
4 years ago

My Iglesias for McCutch in a league where I have Miller, Chapman, Osuna, Hand ?

peacecoast
peacecoast
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: raisel silly

Huggle Bunny Makin' Money
Huggle Bunny Makin' Money
4 years ago

After Lynn’s 5 earned runs and 6 walks SO FAR today, I’m pretty sure I’m going to honor Trevor Williams’s Razzballness by moving him into Lynn’s spot in my rotaish. I’ll take his upside over Lynn’s WHIP-destroying floor anyday. Am I wrong?

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Grey’s Trevor Williams sleeper post is gem!

Robpopp
Robpopp
Reply to  Slimcompoop
4 years ago

@Slimcompoop: I’m all for T Will but don’t drop Lynn, $12M contract ain’t for nothin’. Make room for both

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
4 years ago

I did name my team “Smoak & Mirrors” just before yesterday’s explosion, which I was hesitant to do after last year’s “Made in Correa” jinx debacle derailed my fantasy season. So far so good (knock on Kerry Wood)

Let’s see – I was mad this morning because Polanco was red X’d out of my lineup too late for me to swap him, only to see him in the game on CBS sportsline with an RBI double & a run. So now I’m mad that Yahoo is jacked up & not scoring anything or showing who’s playing.

Not like I pay to use their stupid site, but they could at least take down 1 ad for every time they jack things up. It’s only the 1st week of the season FFS.

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  Lucky Dog
4 years ago

@Lucky Dog: aaaaaandnow all my players have a red X, and Domingo “why did I draft you?” Santana is not in the lineup. Gah!

I had ample time to make the swap. Killin me Yahoo (smalls)

William Hung
William Hung
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: I don’t get why if a game is Postponed, you can’t take the player out of your lineup – the game isn’t being played!!!

Lucky Dog
Lucky Dog
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: samesies. It’s ridonkulous that they lock a lineup for a game that will never start, 5 minutes before it didn’t start. WT(actual)F?

J-FOH
J-FOH
4 years ago

The JT in Realmuto should stand for Just Trade (already)

Im seeing a similar line of thinking for Yasmany as we did Kemp. Can we just call him Young Man Kemp?

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: I’m not sure baseball knows what to do with these guys. Tomas could be the king of Tokyo if you know what I mean.

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: which would be hard to distinguish from the 30 year olds.

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: HUGE…in a lot of ways

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: we need more players named after deli meat. Wouldn’t you love to revisit your Jersey roots on a regular basis by calling someone Pork Roll

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  J-FOH
4 years ago

When he signs with the Phillies we’ll call him pork roll philly

J-FOH
J-FOH
Reply to  J-FOH
4 years ago

Ah, Prospect Mike. the ghost off Razzball’s past

Gb
Gb
4 years ago

Joc or Zimmer

Ryan741
Ryan741
4 years ago

Grey, need your opinion in a H2H points league where QS are worth 3 points and wins are worth 7. Which side do you prefer: team A would get Severino and Strasburg, Team B would get Price, Hendricks, Tanaka and Alex Wood. Team B needs more depth, Team A needs more quality. Thanks

Ryan741
Ryan741
4 years ago

Grey, need your opinion in a H2H points league where QS are worth 3 points and wins are worth 7. Which side do you prefer: team A would get Severino and Strasburg, Team B would get Price, Hendricks, Tanaka and Alex Wood. Team B needs more depth, Team A needs more quality. Thanks

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Ryan741
4 years ago

@Ryan741: Quality starts are worth less than wins? That’s bogus.

The Harrow
The Harrow
Reply to  Slimcompoop
4 years ago

@Slimcompoop: even worse than that they are less than half, for a stat that isn’t even determined by a pitcher.

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
4 years ago

What’s good Grey? When you finally do a lede on Mitch Haniger can it be titled “Mitch Please”?

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Or “Mitch don’t kill my vibe”.

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Slimcompoop
4 years ago

@Slimcompoop: In other news…another owner in my league LOVES Polanco and I drafted him early in my 12-team keeper league. He’s dangling Pollock out there. Next 3 years…Pollock or Polanco?

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
Reply to  Slimcompoop
4 years ago

@Slimcompoop: Also…what do you think about Kyle Freeland? I know Colorado pitchers are scary, but I’m thinking his higher velocity + 1st round draft pick pedigree is going to equate to a breakout season.

Paul
Paul
4 years ago

really not sure if i like this but im being asked Polanco and Kingery for his Mad Bum?
I countered Polanco and Kipnis for his Mad Bum,

but I dont even know if I want to give polanco for Bum,

my OF is Blackmon, Buxton, Puig, Polanco, Conforto, Caloun
and i dont have an ACE pitcher

Paul
Paul
Reply to  Paul
4 years ago

@Paul: He also has verlander i could try to counter ask for

Hater Bell
Grey
Reply to  Paul
4 years ago

@Paul: Why do you want Bum?

Paul
Paul
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: My pitching staff sucks
Wood, Hill, Bauer, Morton, Montgomery, Gausman, Cobb, Harvey,
no real ace type of pitcher

peacecoast
peacecoast
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: isn’t that a little personal Grey?

Paul
Paul
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: Ya makes sense

peacecoast
peacecoast
4 years ago

taillon’s having a ball out there today!

Hater Bell
Grey
Reply to  peacecoast
4 years ago

@peacecoast: HA!

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  peacecoast
4 years ago

@peacecoast:
Brilliantly crafted sir.

steve stevenson
steve stevenson
4 years ago

H2H limited moves, 19 left for the year. Was planning to go without a C for the first week until Realmuto came back. Should I just stick it out for another 2 weeks, or use a precious pickup on a dang catcher?

Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
4 years ago

did the thames deal here

NL only 10 team h2h with OBP over AVG, net steals over steals, QS over wins, holds added. total bases added. keep 3 at previous season’s ADP’s.
C pina
1B freeman (3B)
2B harrison (3B/OF)
SS peraza (2B)
3B longo
MI wong
CI r-zimm
OF (4) hoskins (1B), marte, harper, joc
util b.anderson
BN suzuki (will drop for pitcher soon likely, already had grabbed him over flowers)
BN thames (1B/OF)
NA (1 slot) senzel (so i have my peraza handcuff)
SP (if i had the at bats i’d prefer 8 SP here): wacha/ryu/marquez/stratton/richard/weaver/darvish
RP (4) boxy/alexander/hand/minter
DL straily/gohara (3 slots)

i tried moving stratton or marquez to the guy who has fowler and all of these that sit on his BN but he can’t play them, and eventually he’ll either have to drop/trade them or literally never have SP depth. fowler/belt/kemp/desmond.
he came back with offering fowler for wacha, but according the OPS and QS/holds rater this isn’t enough for wacha. am i good enough now with thames/joc at OF #4 or try to get brocktune for wacha. this would possibly leave my SP pretty weak. if did this i’d just drop joc for a SP streamer.

Hater Bell
Grey
Reply to  Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
4 years ago

@Yr Never Too Old for Balloons: I’d hold for now

Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: also, just dropped suzuki for r.flaherty who starts and thusly doing quite well. i’m many many innings up on opp (my 7 SP are more than him) and probably stand to gain more from at bats here. wong (benched 2 days in a row, that’s half of the games now) peraza (similar) at MI are looking weak.

Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
Yr Never Too Old for Balloons
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: snap, i didn’t realize this was grey till right now, see above and below your avatar is changing to this espn guy who i would guess is klarabell and your normal one.

Smell The Glove
Smell The Glove
4 years ago

12 team keeper league, need another OF. Thinking of adding Choo. Who would you drop: Matt Davidson or Andrelton Simmons? I’m pretty balanced in speed and power. It is also an OPS league.

Uncle Ernie
Uncle Ernie
4 years ago

Great write up as usual. Love this stuff! With Peraza’s current lack of perduction when do you think the shitstorm brings a change and Senzel comes up to play 2b.Anytime soon. Thanks

peacecoast
peacecoast
4 years ago

wtf is colin moran

peacecoast
peacecoast
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: uh, yeah, yeah oh that guy!

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
4 years ago

Lance Lynn can eat a D!

Scott Dalton
Scott Dalton
4 years ago

Need a DH, who would you pick: Chapman, Ramirez, Candelario.

Scott Dalton
Scott Dalton
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
I wish it was Jose, I should have specified its Hanley. Oh was just watching Pirates game, so I’ll add Moran to that list. Could he bust out this year? On side note PNC Park looks amazing I really got to make it there some day. Thanks!

ERad
ERad
4 years ago

I’ll be really upset if this is the year Gregory Polanco finally breaks out

ERad
ERad
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey: I don’t know if there is a glossary term for this – but there’s nothing worse than when the guy you’ve drafted the last few years finally breaks out the year you give up on him.

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
How about a Dangerfield?… for the late great Rodney!

My psychiatrist told me I’m going crazy. I told him, ‘If you don’t mind, I’d like a second opinion.’ He said, ‘OK. You’re ugly too!’

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
4 years ago

“The official start of the shooting of Gomorrah 4 is scheduled for April this year and will last until the end of 2018 and then finally start on Sky atlantic in early 2019”

….so long to wait

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
Ha. With all this baseball going on did we even talk about S3 ending?

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
Ciro, the Immortal!
I love the pace of the show but it moved way fast S3.

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:

One day Genny had nothing… next day he had millions
And his kid is the worst frign actor amiright haha.

Hater Bell
Grey
Reply to  FrankGrimes
4 years ago

@FrankGrimes: I hope it was a dream, trying to avoid spoilers for people even though I don’t think anyone’s watching

FrankGrimes
FrankGrimes
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@Grey:
a dream? Come on man Haha no way.

Malicious Phenoms
Malicious Phenoms
Reply to  Grey
4 years ago

@ERad: @Grey:

I was able to trade Lester for Polanco on opening day eve. All good so far.

Malicious Phenoms
Malicious Phenoms
Reply to  Malicious Phenoms
4 years ago

@Malicious Phenoms:
Put this i the wrong place..

Reece King
Reece King
4 years ago

Start Ryu and Mikolas on 2-start weeks? Weekly lineup league.

Dave Funnell
Dave Funnell
4 years ago

When someone says “Name your price”, do you reach for the moon or go logically so as to not end he conversation there.

I have Hoskins and Benintendi locker up for 2 years at $1. Owner wants one or three other, maybe even both. The only players I see as at least equal value or helping me are: Trout $90, Harper $81, Severino $4, Taillon $1, I. Happ $1, Arenado $47. I can keep Trout and Harper for 3 years but those prices are too high. Potential trade bait of in out of it in August. Severino and Taillon are great, but with deGrom, Kluber, Ray, Corbin and MadBum, I don’t necessarily need pitching though I could amass points now and trade later. Arenado is tempting but I lose him regardless after this season.

Should I just hold? 11 team points league.

Hater Bell
Grey