Schoop, there it is! Jonathan Schoop continued his mashfest in Chicago Friday night as he reached base in each of his plate appearances going 4-for-4 with a double, a walk, two home runs (8, 9) and 5 runs batted in. Oh Jonathan, each time I think I’m out, you pull me back in. Tell me Jonny, what’s it like on the sun, because you’ve been more or less the hottest hitter in baseball hitting .565 over the past week with the monster five bombs and 10 RBI. He’s also got multi-hit games in six of his past 10. Grey told you to BUY and thinks he saw Schoop at CVS last week. Lol! CVS! He buys things at pharmacies just like us–how relatable! Probably picking up some Icy Hot to cool off that flaming hot bat. I asked Salt and Pepa of popular 90s rap group Salt-N-Pepa what they thought about adding Jonathan and they said, “I wanna Schoop, baby. Schoop, ba-doop!” and you wouldn’t know it but they’re actually huge fantasy heads. What more can I say, you all know by now what Jonathan Schoop’s ceiling is. He’s not Tatis all of a sudden but he is a hot little potato right now and is batting close to .400 over the past two weeks. The 9/15 K/BB is also nothing to sneeze at–unless you’re allergic to OBP. These kinds of numbers, ie barrages of home runs, will help your fantasy team. He’s still available in over 50% of leagues, but 50% of those are likely abandoned and managed by the super intelligent zombies in Army of the Dead. Yes the tiger, too. And even the undead know to add this guy while he’s hotter than a Billie Eilish slumber party. Yep, I’m definitely a Lost Cause. Regardless, time to scoop a Schoop!

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Eric Haase – 2-for-4, HR (5), 2 RBI. BUY. Three homers in the past week AND…dot, dot, dot, wait for it cause you’re gonna love this part–he’s a catcher! I know! I almost spoiled the surprise I was so excited.

Willi Castro – 3-for-3, run. Hitting .600 over the past week with a steal! Make way for Willi! As long as he keeps hitting baseballs he should get regular ABs. He bats .350 in 2020 in 36 games and although he’s unlikely to steal many more bases, he could be useful for average if you’re as desperate for middle infield help as I am for positive feedback.

Spencer Turnbull – 4.0 IP, 2 hits, ER, 4 K, and Dallas Keuchel – 6.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, BB, 3 K. You wouldn’t think these were the starting pitchers’ lines based on the final score of the game but bullpens were bad I guess. Spence left this one with an injury but sounds like he won’t miss his next start. A juicy match-up with Seattle.

Yasmani Grandal – 2-for-2, 3 runs, 2 HR (9). Speaking of catchers, the nine home runs make it a little easier to ignore .154 average, and he does have three bombs in the past two games.

Nick Madrigal – 2-for-4, HR (2). I was all in on most of the White Sox hitters and then Luis Robert went down and so did most of my hopes and dreams. The .296/.337/.414 is nice as are the two homers but the lack of speed has been disappointing. And those are my 13 reasons why.

Ryan Mountcastle – 1-for-4, HR (7). Woah, that last joke was pretty dark, sorry! Wait, did you like that one? Oh wow, I’m flattered, I’ll try to use it again. Mounty’s got three homers in the past week hitting close to .320! Not sure if hot schmotato or finally breaking out but he’s worth adding either way especially if the latter one is actually happening.

DJ Stewart – 2-for-3. Doesn’t have the upside of Mountcastle obviously, but does have the three dingers in the past week and can’t possibly be any worse than he has been.

Paul Fry – 1.0 IP, 2 hits, K, SV(2). BUY. It was a bit shakier an outing than I’d want out of a closer I’m telling you to pick up but I still think you should pick him up! And Grey so in his Paul Fry Fantasy Outlook, too!

Juan Soto – 1-for-4, HR (7). He’s back, baby! *cracks a cold, refreshing Dr. Pepper, takes a sip, audibly satisfying “ahhh”*

Max Scherzer – 7.2 IP, 5 hits, ER, BB, 9 K, 5th win, ERA at 2.22. I hate when I discount a player because they get 0ld or worse, because they had a shaky 2020, a season which tbh should be completely thrown out of the books (that’s right, no Dodgers WS). So Mad Max had ‘Rona on his mind in 2020 and it led to his worst stat line since 2012 and THAT led to you drafting my boy at a supreme discount. So let’s rewind, skip 2020, and forget that we thought for one second this guy couldn’t win another Cy Young in 2021. And yes, Mookie Betts is back on the Red Sox in this reality.

Zack Wheeler – 7.1 IP, 5 hits, 2 ER, 2 BB, 8 K. The best thing Zack Wheeler ever did for his career was leaving the Mets.

Zack Greinke – 9.0 IP, 6 hits, ER, BB, 3 K and lowered his ERA to 3.38. Daaaaamn Z. Didn’t know you still had it in ya. His first complete game since 2017. Since a 4.0 inning mess versus Toronto on May 9th, Greinke has pitched at least 6.0 innings in five straight, that’s 38.0 IP in five starts and he won four of them. Haven’t seen a guy be a “horse” pitcher for his team like this in a while, and it’s especially uncharacteristic of the typical injury-prone Greinkster. Is the best yet to come for Zack? Whatever bro, I likes what I see so keep it up.

Carlos Correa – 2-for-5, 2 HR (10), 4 RBI. Were you expecting another Zack? CC is slashing .277/.364/.485 with 10 bombs and having his best year since the Astros cheated and won everything. No, they are never going to live this down. Never ever.

Martin Maldonado – 2-for-5, Grand Slam HR (4). Just his third multi-hit game all year as he’s batting .164/.245/.286 and his 14 RBI have come in just five games. Pick him up if you hate yourself.

Aledmys Diaz – 3-for-6, HR (3). He’s hitting .380 with a homer in the past week. Just own all the Astros I guess? Have I mentioned they’re cheaters? Is it cheating to knowingly own a cheater in fantasy baseball? I didn’t think so either!

Hyun-Jin Ryu – 5.2 IP, 7 hits, 6 ER, 3 BB, K. Every so often, not all the time but sometimes, a pitcher has to face the Astros. And I don’t know if I have mentioned this yet but the Astros were busted for cheating in 2017. Yeah so, tough outing for Ryu, but understandable.

Randal Grichuk – 1-for-3, HR (12). Quietly having a career year, he’s on pace for 35+ homers people, which looks like the Grichuk we saw in 2019 except this Grichuk is batting almost 50 points higher!

Ke’Bryan Hayes – 2-for-4, HR (2), 3 RBI. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dying to have me some Ke’Bryan! Hey, at least I’m trying. He’s 4-for-8 with a homer and 3 RBI in two games since his return and has instantly sparked this offense. I think the most important stats in Ke’B’s two games back is that the Bucs have won both games.

Adam Frazier – 2-for-3, 3 runs, 2 RBI and Bryan Reynolds – 2-for-5, run, RBI. Woah! Look who suddenly has value now that they’re in a lineup with protection. Bucs scored 9 runs with 12 hits and Ke’Bryan bout to change the game.

Freddy Peralta – 7.1 IP, 1 hit, ER, 3 BB, 9 K, 6th win. How did the Brewers go from having one of the scariest offenses in baseball 2-3 years ago with hardly a starter in their rotation to having one of the scariest pitching rotations in baseball with one of the weakest lineups in the MLB. Life moves pretty fast, Ferris.

Omar Narvaez – 2-for-3, 3 runs, HR (5), 2 RBI. Probably the only Brewers hitter you should own or at least the only one you should admit to owning. What do you guys not talk about your teams at cocktail parties? What do you guys not go to many cocktail parties?

Kyle Gibson – 5.1 IP, 5 hits, 0 ER, 5 K, 4-0 in his return from the IL. Will probably be a Yankee by July 31. His performance prevented Texas from losing their 10th straight loss and Kyle has a 2.06 ERA and 53/19 K/BB over 11 outings. You read that correctly, they are not typos. Kyle Gibson is your next Lance Lynn.

Joey Gallo – 2-for-4, HR (10). I got some “bro, this doode is batting .200 should i drop or nah?” questions the past couple weeks and my answer is “Nah bro.” If you drafted Gallo you drafted him with an expectation he’s going to hit .200. He’s also going to hit 40 home runs.

Nick Solak – 3-for-4, run. Sonuvadrop!

Julio Urias – 5.0 IP, 4 hits, ER, 2 BB, 5 K, 8th win. Tied for MLB lead in wins. Just want to note real quick that Urias is not only not the Dodgers “Ace,” he’s their fourth starter! Ya they are good. So before we feel bad for the Dodgers for their injuries or because they haven’t won a World Series in 30+ years (we threw 2020 out, remember the Scherzer blurb!), just remember that their fourth starter is more valuable than anyone on the Mariners.

Max Muncy – 0-for-2 as left the game with an injury. If only the Dodgers had some sort of back-up future Hall of Famer to replace him while he’s out. Whoever this replacement is, I hope he has at least 600 career home runs. Wouldn’t bother with anyone with less.

Ian Anderson – 4.1 IP, 1 hit, 4 ER, 3 BB, 6 K. Shut down LA for four innings but unraveled in the fifth. Ian been inconsistent all year but so have the Braves so maybe they’re just being coached to do this.

Freddie Freeman – 1-for-5, 2 runs, HR (13). Struck out three times but you got me the solo shot so that’ll do, Fred. That’ll do.

Chris Taylor – 1-for-3, run, RBI. When the Dodgers score nine runs and no one on your fantasy team really benefits. Have I brought up how the Dodgers bench could probably beat the Mariners?

Matt Shoemaker– 0.1 IP, 6 hits, 8 ER, 2 BB. Shoemaker got polished by Royals!

Nick Gordon – 3-for-4, HR (1). FLASH! AHHHH-AHHHHH! Master of the Universe! Tom Gordon’s kiddo hit his first career home run and is batting .417 in three games this week. Not sure if he’ll see enough playing time to make him relevant in fantasy but the dude’s got speed for days and could be worth a look if he continues to get starts.

Brad Keller – 5.0 IP, 7 hits, 2 ER, 5 K, 6th win. That’s two more wins than Jacob deGrom, so who’s really the “best starter in baseball?” It’s deGrom. That’s an easy one. It’s definitely deGrom.

Jorge Polanco – 2-for-4, 2 runs, HR (6), RBI. Was falling asleep looking at the Minnesota offense so I started watching this Netflix show about the little deer boy and I’m thinking, oh man, this is weird. They’ll put anything on Netflix these days. And then I got seriously hooked and watched five episodes until like 3am and I’m thinking to myself, “Oh man, the Twins really need Byron Buxton back.”

Whit Merrifield– 2-for-4, HR (5) and Michael Taylor 2-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBI. Royals scored 14 runs on 12 hits. To Whit, Merrifield hit a 3-run bomb in the first inning and KC never looked back. I don’t want them to get too comfortable without Adalberto. Apparently, I need Mondesi to play more than the Royals do.

Luis Castillo – 6.0 IP, 3 hits, ER, BB, 5 K. Good Lord have mercy halle-Luis-jah! Luis is still capable of a quality start. First time he went 6+ IP since April 7. He lowered his ERA to 6.63 after the outing. I’d tell you to buy but I don’t think I can dodge that many tomatoes.

Michael Feliz – 0.1 IP, SV (1). If you thought this game might shed some light on the Reds closer shituation you’d be wrong. They were all pretty bad. Lucas Sims still most likely gets the next chance though.

Jonathan India – 2-for-2, HR (4). So fetch! Stop trying to make Jonathan India happen. It’s not going to happen.

Tyler Stephenson – 2-for-4, HR (3), 2 RBI. Oh hey! You guys like catchers and Tylers! How about back-up catchers named Tyler? Here’s a two-fer.

Frankie Montas – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 3 ER, BB, 2 K. Cool start, Frankie! Rocky mountain cool. Only threw about 70 pitches but was lifted in this one cuz National League, ya’ll. Pitchers. Be. Hitting. And usually not very well.

Jon Gray – 2.1 IP, 4 hits, 5 ER, 2 BB, 0 K and left game with an injury. At the very least this might prevent you from starting him again.

Mark Canha – 2-for-3, HR (11), 2 RBI. Canha get-a what what. Canha get-a home run! Bounce with me, bounce with me!

Sean Murphy – 3-for-5, HR (6) 3 RBI. Hello, catcher I dropped in April. Nice to see you’re still alive and well.

Taylor Trammell – 2-for-3, run. BUY. Sure, why not buy. What have you got to lose? He can at the very least be as good as Jarred Kelenic has been.

Justin Upton – 1-for-2, HR (12), 2 RBI. Justin Upside’s only upside these days is his power, don’t ask me why he’s leading off, these are questions for the mixed up mind of Joe Madman Maddon.

Shohei Ohtani – 6.0 IP, 4 hits, 2 ER, 10 K, 2nd win and 0-for-2, BB. TIL learned two things. That “TIL” is an acronym for “today I learned” and that the DH is optional. I still don’t know what DH is an acronym for but maybe next week! Is it coincidental that most of the best hitting pitchers live in the National League or I might have seen this happen more? Or is this just another Mad Maddon being cray cray thing.

Raisel Iglesias – 2.0 IP, 4 K, SV (5). One smart thing Angels did was sign this guy in the offseason. Can you imagine if Angels had closer by committee on top of all their other messes? It would be a–uh, mess.

Scott Kazmir – 2.0 IP, 3 hits, 2 ER, 3 K. Wow! Blast from the Past, Brendan Fraser! The Giants can make any starter look good this year. Can we get Matt Harvey in the Bay somehow? Teams should temporarily trade their starters to SF to get them out of slumps. We’ll loan you Luis Castillo for a month and you trade him back before he wins the Cy Young. Deal?

Tyler Rogers – 1.0 IP, SV (7). Jake McGee pitched a clean 8th inning. Tyler’s got seven saves with a 1.57 ERA, 0.94 WHIP to McGee’s 14 and looks to be the preferred option in the ninth. Still, the Giants win lots of games and get lots of save opps so both probably need to be owned.

LaMonte Wade Jr. – 1-for-5, HR (2). Jason Vosler and Steve Duggar also homered. And if you don’t know who any of these players are don’t worry–I don’t really either. LMJ has two homers and a steal in the past week and is leading off sometimes, but honestly I don’t know how to recommend these Giants bats.

Joc Pederson – 1-for-4, HR (6). Kris Bryant also homered (13). What!? He’s Joc Pederson. Did you think he was not going to hit of ton of home runs? Cause he is. He could bat under .100, but he’s definitely gonna ding dong some dingers.

Blake Snell – 7.0 IP, 1 hit, BB, 10 K, 2nd win. If yaaa Snelllllllll! Things were getting pretty dark for a second there, weren’t they Blake? After giving up 12 ER in his past two starts Snell turned in what may have been his best start in over a year–which is saying something for last year’s Cy Young winner. It was his first time completing seven innings since 2019, something I’m sure is real bad news for his haterz, and something I’m also sure he’ll say something awful about on social media which will make me like him less again. Despite his attitude and his struggles, Blake has been great at PetCo and he’s got a date with the Cubs there next week. Can you still buy low? *dodges tomato*

Joey Lucchesi –  4.2 IP, 4 hits, ER, 3 K. Not even the sweet, fragrant allure of Lil’ Joey Lucchesi of the Mozzarella di parma Luchessis could get me to add him while he’s on the Mets. The Sargento Provolone cousins and even the Belgioioso Parmigiano-Reggiano family were on hand to see Joey start but I need to see more before I fuggedabout his past two years.

Manny Machado – 1-for-3, HR (7). If I’m looking for buy lows, I’m looking at Manny Machado and his 54% hard-hit rate. It doesn’t hurt that he bats in front of the best hitter in the league. Try to snatch him up before he catches fire.

Mark Melancon – 1.0 IP, 2 hits, 3 K, SV (19). Nineteen saves is quite literally more saves than four of my fantasy teams have. Two of them combined. And those are my 13 reasons why.

Nathan Eovaldi – 6.0 IP, 8 hits, ER, 7 K, 7th win. His most wins since 2015? 2016 with the NYC City Yankees. Naturally, Nate looks confident in the Bronx surrendering only a home run to Aaron Judge for his third win in a row. He’ll try to make it four versus Houston next week. Ya I’m not so sure about that one either.

Michael King – 5.1 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, 5 K, ERA at 3.62. Pitched an Immaculate Inning in the fourth which was the seventh Immaculate Inning in Yankees history and the first ever Immaculate Inning in a Sawx/Yankees game! Wow! So boring, I mean interesting. How many times did I type Immaculate Inning. Asked about the accomplishment postgame King said, “I’d rather win a game than throw an immaculate inning.” Awesome! He sounds stoked!

Matt Barnes – 1.0 IP, 3 K, SV (13). Striking out the side to end the game and seal the win in the Bronx? Sounds a lot more like an Immaculate Inning to me. Also, I think I’m in love. Haven’t felt this way about a closer since Koji.

Aaron Judge – 2-for-4, HR (14). The Yankees struck out 15 times including one from Judge and 0-for-4K golden sombrero night from Gary Sanchez who’s got seven Ks in his last nine ABs. Is it just me or has Sanchez been secretly taking hitting tips from Rougned Odor.

Rafael Devers – 1-for-4, 3-run HR (15). He gets paid lots of money to hit home runs. He likes that. Me too. What’s not to like?

Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!

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Gigorilla -- Gregg
Gigorilla -- Gregg
1 year ago

fewer words Dan, Please

RicoSuave
RicoSuave
1 year ago

Great report Dan Pants!

16 team H2H weekly points league

I need a closer

Fry, Sims or Feyereisien?

Thanks

RicoSuave
RicoSuave
Reply to  Dan Pants
1 year ago

Thanks man!

Will
Will
1 year ago

That’s save number 10 for Raisel Iglesias, not number 5.

bob
bob
1 year ago

please rank the following 3B men in roto ROS
riley donaldson , chapman bohm and kiner felefa thanks

pjohnson
pjohnson
1 year ago

Diaz not on 2017 Astros. Not cheater
From fan graphs: 2017 Away Astro team average:284
Home Astro team average:279
Interesting…it’s time to move along and quit the snide comments

pjohnson
pjohnson
Reply to  Dan Pants
1 year ago

Lol. That’s fair and I typically enjoy your review of the Friday night games. As an aside, as an Astros fan, Correa as a 1-1 drives me crazy with his offensive inconsistency. I literally have no faith when he steps to the plate with RISP. I’m hoping the last couple of weeks are the trend and not the exception.

mattj
mattj
1 year ago

Why not make Jonathan India happen? H2H pts league, I’m staring at whether I stash Arraez on my bench while he’s on the IL or grabbing India and his position flexibility. Last 7 days OPS is 1.214 and his last 14 days OPS is 1.053. Most of his peripherals look decent too. Is the only concern the number of plate appearances he gets or his spot in the batting order? I don’t follow the Reds and I can’t find a whole lot of news on him, so I’m genuinely curious.

mattj
mattj
Reply to  Dan Pants
1 year ago

No prob. He wasn’t even near draftable for me pre-season, so I guess I’m playing catch up on him. Do you think he’s worth grabbing? The lack of anything useful anywhere about him is making me second guess his value.

Nuke Laloush
Logan
1 year ago

Someone is offering one of their “back half of the rotation” guys for Kebryan Hayes…so that’s Robbie Ray, Framber, Kyle Gibson, and Max Fried. Should I take one of them and which?

I’m afraid Hayes is gonna be a true star but I already have Bregman and Devers. His stock is so high since he came back blazing but he has Dodgers-Brewers aces this week and will cool down (and not play for me). I can aim higher maybe with Bregman or Devers, because my hitting is great and pitching sucks. As far as those options, I actually kinda like Frambers upside enough to pick him from that group but most trade analyzers hate it.

Help me out here!

Nuke Laloush
Logan
Reply to  Dan Pants
1 year ago

Oh actually it’s a very shallow league, and I picked him up a week or so ago to stash him…so my entire strategy was somewhat as a trade piece. Would you say aim higher while he has the shiny new toy appeal? Again, my pitching sucks, so dealing Bregman or Devers is in play for me. Bregman is cold right now though and we keep 8 in my league and I think of Devers as a cornerstone.

With that context is Framber, Fried or Ray equivalent value, and so aim higher but then still do one of those deals if I must?

Jimmy
Jimmy
1 year ago

Thoughts on hard hittin Chris Gittens

Shitwolf
Shitwolf
1 year ago

I grabbed Castillo when he was dropped and traded Gallo for snell after his 11k game so uhh prematurely jumped on that tomatoe grenade for ya. I also have Sonny gray and tj antone so I am covered in reds! and with that trash joke I am out!

have a good weekend

Slimcompoop
Slimcompoop
1 year ago

Thanks for the write-up Senor Pantalones!

Don't be a Hader
Don't be a Hader
1 year ago

Need pitching in a 14 teamer… I.Happ too much for L.Castillo?

Mike Honcho
Mike Honcho
1 year ago

Single C 12 team roto mixer…Narvaez or G.Sanchez ROS??
I.Happ or Ty France?

Hill Billy
Hill Billy
1 year ago

Sending out Rich Hill @ TEX or keeping on bench?