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Please see our player page for Aaron Judge to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

“Owen, you stupid poop!” is a line from Throw Momma From The Train, but is not a line you’re going to hear at Brewers games. Unless it’s in this context, “Owen, you stupid poop, but ‘stupid’ as in ‘fresh’ or ‘dope’ and ‘dope’ as in great not as in dumb, and ‘poop’ as in you’re the shizz.” Somehow, I haven’t mentioned Owen Miller (3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (3) and legs (5), hitting .347) much. Well, I’ve got Miller fatigue, okay? And ‘fatigue’ is Italian, pronounced fah-tee-gay. I’ve mentioned many Millers — Shelby, Bryce, Mason, Bobby — but not Owen. He’s been playing 3rd every day for the Brewers, and should continue until Urias returns. He’s also got 15/15 potential with an insanely low strikeout rate. Prolly more of an NL-Only guy, but could see him paying dividends in 15-teamers or HTMLers. Get it? Div id ends? No? Okay. I don’t really get it either. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

James Paxton impressed again Friday night pitching six innings of one-run baseball, allowing seven base runners (five hits, two walks) and striking out five for his first win since August 2020! If you understand that headline you probably smoke way too much weed, stoner! More importantly, after dealing to the Cards last week (5.0 IP, 4 hits, 2 ER, BB, 9 K), Pax did it again mostly silencing the Padres at home. Never mind that it had been almost two years since his last start, Paxton’s marching out there like he’s been doing this all season, providing stability to a Boston rotation that badly needs some of that. His command wasn’t as sharp as last week, but his only real blemish was a shot to Tatis, and c’mon, there’s really no stopping that guy. James had four strikeouts through the first three innings and while the 98 mph gas is obviously impressive its the fact that he’s mixing it up that makes me think he could be a serviceable starter going forward. We saw some first pitch curves, he kept hitters off balance mixing the fastball with the cutter, knuckle curve, change and got out of a bases loaded jam in the fourth. I held my breathe when he came out for the sixth but he ended the night retiring the last seven in order. Again, unlike last week, Paxton did not have his best stuff Friday night, he struggled with command and still managed to battle through six innings and that’s what really gives me hope. He threw 107 pitches (66 for strikes) the most he’s thrown in a game since 2019 as a Yankee (versus the Red Sox no less!). You’d think Manager Cora would be a bit more conservative with the pitch counts for his oft-injured starter but nay, they need James to be this guy and he was Friday night. He was Him. And as much as I hate that smug look on Chaim Bloom’s face, James now sports a pretty 2.46 ERA with a 14/3 K/BB in two starts since his return from Tommy John. Rafael Devers said of James through a translator, “He’s awesome.” Well said Raffy, and no rush on learning English any time soon–it’s only been seven years, you take your sweet time and focus on hitting dongs. As for the Big Maple James Paxton, with this line up behind him, he’s looking like he could be a useful fantasy starter in the right match ups, and hopefully these massive Pax rips are more than just smoke cause this new (old) game James Pax a real punch!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

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After the game, the Cards’ front office called Willson Contreras in. He just went 2-for-5, 6 RBIs and notched his 4th and 5th homers — two three-run homers. They wanted to have a word with him. Congratulations, Contreras thought. They could just send a bottle of champagne back to his room, he figured. Maybe they wanted to give it to him in-person. A gesture, that would be welcome. Contreras sat down in front of Oli Marmol and John Mozeliak. “Willson,” they started, “You had a big game today. Do you have any idea how that made Adam Wainwright feel? He’s got a 5.74 ERA, and you’re out scoring that many runs? That’s gotta take a toll on him. Jack Flaherty was in that dugout, and every time you crossed the plate, you could hear him mutter, ‘I give up runs like that.’ Steven Matz looked on the verge of tears! Poor Matzy! This is why Yadi knew best! He knew not to hit home runs. It’s too much showboating. That’s not the Cardinals’ way.” With that, they dismissed Contreras to go back and apologize to his teammates for performing so well. Hopefully he learns his lesson. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Domingo German was coasting once again, had the line 3 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 3.75, when he was ejected for sticky substance. Oh, Domingoo, you giant freakin’ moron. What’s the German word for hearing the Jays talk about the Yankees cheating and thinking, “Hey, that’s a good idea?” Fadenfraud. Also, this whole “touching a guy’s hand” to see if there’s anything on it is so hilariously stupid. Like touching a guy’s hand is scientific. The Handump’s Tale, a dystopian story of how one umpire touched things and was able to discern what on earth was on someone’s hand. “That’s chewing gum and the adhesive from a baby’s diaper.” Umps touching pitchers’ hands is like Name That Tune, but with touching. Domingo German, though, this guy’s a real bumbling idiot:

He’s like the kid who has ice cream all over his shirt then says, “I didn’t eat ice cream.” You’re covered in it, you absolute ding dong! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Count’s 2-1, and Jack Flaherty is leaning in…and, would you look at that, that is interesting…Willson Contreras is calling for an 88 MPH fastball down the middle.” I kid! Jack Flaherty (7 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 5.24) looked great! After the first inning. Was a bit wonky at the start. At one point, he went from a 75 MPH curve to a 95 MPH elevated fastball to a 84.5 MPH slider to a 79.5 MPH knuckle curve on four straight batters, all resulting in strikeouts. All he needed for motivation was to prove his own catcher sucked. “But how,” Jack Flaherty wondered in his most sincere of voices, “Could a pitcher look good while making his catcher look bad?” Flaherty still desperately needs command from pitch 1 to 100 while going 95 on the fastball, but last night was a step in the right direction. Speaking of directions, the Cards all sucked together, and now they’re all fantastic together. The Cards’ way, I suppose. Nolan Arenado (2-for-3, 4 RBIs and his 7th homer, and 4th homer in four games) is going off, and I had a reason to Sell Low written down that was so eloquent. It’s right over by this open window–NOOOO!!! Torenado! Also, in this game, Andrew Knizner (1-for-1, 2 runs, 4 RBIs) hit his 3rd homer, and 2nd in as many games. This homer was vs. a position player, but there ain’t no asterisks in my fantasy league. Next, Tommy Edman (4-for-5, 4 runs, 2 RBIs) hit his 6th homer, as he heard the footsteps of people going to waivers to drop him. Finally, Nolan Gorman (3-for-5, 2 runs, 5 RBIs) hit his 10th homer, as the house of Cards begins to rise again. Hopefully, Oli Marmol isn’t inspired to give one of his motivational speeches again like, “Tyler O’Neill and Willson Contreras, you guys suck and can’t field your positions or run and I hate all of you.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Jordan steps behind the three point line, head fakes Ehlo, who sails past him, tumbling to the half-court line. Jordan looks at the fallen Ehlo, “Was it that good of a head fake?” He sets himself, and goes up, up, up, — that’s three ups — and the ball is soaring, soaring, soaring — that’s three soarings — and SWISH! SWISH SWISH! That’s three swishes! Right into the…bleachers? Jordan Diaz shrugs at Ehlo. It’s a Shruggle! He gave him the Shruggle! The patented “Who knew I was this good?” and rounds the bases. Jordan Diaz has done the impossible! He’s made Grey talk about basketball — kinda! Yesterday, Diaz went (3-for-4, 4 RBIs) with three homers, his 2nd, 3rd and 4th. Jordan’s homer comes a day after MJ’s homer. Pippen ain’t easy, obviously. I’ve said previously Jordan Diaz is like a poor man’s Luis Arraez. Call him Luis I-Need-A-Raise. That might be selling his power short, and his batting average high. At least for this year. He could sneak into a 15-17 homer season, but being in Oakland won’t help. His strikeouts are up, so the potential .280 average feels like a long shot. He could also just be finding himself like Jason Bourne or that guy on The Citadel, a blatant rip-off of Jason Bourne. At worst, a hot schmotato. At best, Jordan gives us more Flu Games. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

By now, many of you may have seen one of the video clips of Blake Snell quizzing the Padres broadcasters about wRC+.  If you haven’t, the conversation goes something like this: Snell: “I’ve got a question for y’all” Broadcaster: “Sure” Snell: “On the board it said ‘Carp wRC+’ What does that mean?” Broadcaster: “I have […]

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I usually like to start with something like, it’s been a wild, unpredictable season in the outfield thus far! But when you look closely – and see Ronald Acuna, Randy Arozarena, Adolis Garcia and Mike Trout in the top four – nothing strikes you as particularly unbelievable. As you work your way down in the […]

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Seattle Mariners, or as they’re known in the Pacific Northwest “Seattle’s Best Club,” are calling up their 24-year-old right-hander, Bryce Miller. Last thing Itch said on Miller was, “His time is nigh, but he’ll need something to go wrong in a stacked rotation.” El oh el. Not at Itch, but at the M’s. Um, go wrong in their rotation? If their only crack was in Robbie Ray’s pants. Itch said earlier in the preseason in his top 75 prospects rankings, “If you’re looking for a deep-sleeper starter late in a draft-and-hold format, it might be Miller time. A 4th round pick in 2021, Miller has chugged right through the minor leagues and figures to open this season in Triple-A after posting a 1.05 WHIP in 50.2 innings across ten Double-A starts in 2022. The main worry is that he goes the way of Matt Brash. His delivery isn’t as low or unbalanced (reliever-y) as Brash’s, but he too is a fastball-slider dominant pitcher getting kind outcomes in a kind setting. Speaking of kind, ever wanted a Kind Bar truck to fall on Grey?” What the heck! Miller’s command looks crazy wonky, but it was decent this year in 19 2/3 IP (1.4 BB/9). He looks closer to a 3.5 BB/9 or higher, which smells of trouble. His strikeouts should be around 8.6-9.1 K/9. On the “oh crap that’s bad” side, he could go 3.5 BB/9 and 8.5 K/9 and be a 4.50+ ERA guy. On the “oh, daddy, that’s nice, I’m appreciative of your love” side, he could have a 9+ K/9 and 2 BB/9 and be a strong number two. Like in the carnival game “water gun used to blow up the balloon in the clown’s mouth,” aim your expectations for the middle. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Max Scherzer was cruising, as is often the case with Max Scherzer — had a line of 3 IP, 0 ER — when he was ejected for having (what the umpires believed to be) a foreign substance on his glove. Scherzer was screaming, “It’s rosin!” It seemed like the Pitchcom tape inside his glove because he calls his own game. It better — again, with some stank — IT BETTER check out as a foreign substance or all of those umpires should be suspended without pay for thirty games. Umps are power-mad idiots. You throw out a first ballot Hall of Famer for what you believe is something sticky? That’s absurd. You taint his legacy with some utter nonsense? Are you completely daft? Now, MLB instituted an automatic 10-game suspension for the offender, so Scherzer might miss another two starts due to this? Oh, this is some serious BS.

Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The crazy analytics that the Rays have that no one else has: Pinpointing what players are good at and reenforcing that some players only do what they’re good at. For unstints, they’ll tell someone like Drew Rasmussen (7 IP, 0 ER, 1hit, zero walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 0.00) “pitch well,” and only “pitch well.” Crazy, right? Sometimes they’ll say to a hitter, “Hit well.” That has never been done before by a Major League Baseball team. One time they said to Vidal Brujan, “Be terrible,” and what do you know? What did he do? I’m gonna give you one guess here. He was terrible! It’s analytics like this that allow the Rays to save money too. The Rays received a bill from their travel department and were like, “This is way too much money to travel to games,” so they said to Manuel Margot, “Fly the plane,” and that’s what he did. Analytics, that’s what this is. So, I went to look to see if Drew Rasmusen had a sleeper post written by me, but he didn’t. Guess I merely loved him vs. wrote him up. Wanna know how much pitching there is in the majors? Rasmussen has a 2.96 ERA in 243 1/3 IP in his career. Yeah, but you have to draft a top starter. Mmkay. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?