Not quite as spiritually moving as John Lennon, but imagine for a moment Jose Abreu were to actually put together two solid halves in the same year.  “Imagine there’s no heaven, it’s easy if you try.  No ‘He’ll end up below Andrus,’ for half the year.  Above Andrus only this Jose guy.  Imagine Abreu playing a decent, full season like today.  Aha-ha…  Imagine there’s no countries.  It isn’t hard to do.  Nothing to drop or trade for, and no ‘Abreu’s so cold it’s like this hell has a fridge in it’ too.  Imagine all the people living to get a piece of…Abreu…  You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one!  I hope some day Abreu’ll be better than Andrus, and play an entire season as one.”  So, Jose Abreu hit two homers yesterday (3-for-7, 7 RBIs, and 21st and 22nd HRs), and he’s been great recently, but it’s hard to get that excited about a guy for 2017 who invariably takes three months off every year.  Can’t imagine he’s a top 25 player ever again.  You-WHO-OOH!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

James Shields – 2 1/3 IP, 5 ER, but said he tweaked his back.  He added, “If you believe a tweaked back is why I looked terrible on Saturday, let’s just say my back has been tweaked since 2014.”

Byron Buxton – 3-for-6, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and a grand slam (4), and his 3rd homer in his last four games since he was recalled.  Maybe you can wait a long time to pick up guys in your league, but if you wait too long, the season’s going to be over.  Cust an FYI.

Brian Dozier – 3-for-6, 2 RBIs and his 35th homer, hitting .276.  That was his 20th homer since the All-Star break.  Yeah, that’s the best in the majors.  (The top 3 is a tad goofy:  Dozier, Gyorko and Khris Davis.)

Miguel Sano – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 22nd homer, hitting .239.  In retrospect, it’s hard to even picture what other fantasy ‘perts were thinking when they ranked Sano so freakin’ high in the preseason.  Lucky you listened to me.  You didn’t?  Aw, shucks.

Brandon Kintzler –  1 1/3 IP, 2 ER and his 2nd blown save.  At approximately 4:19 local time, “Yay, Kintzler’s going to get a save!”  At approximately 4.20 local time, “Why do I own Kintzler?  Seriously.  Am I stupid?  Answer me, mirror!”

Cam Bedrosian – Will undergo season-ending surgery to address a blood clot in his arm.  Or as it’s known in Jamaica “blood clot.”  Which is technically the same, but it sounds much cooler there.

Albert Pujols – 3-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 29th homer, after hitting two homers on Saturday.  Because he eats plantar fasciitis for breakfast!  Hope that’s scrambled eggs between his toes.

C.J. Cron – 1-for-4 and his 15th homer.  I don’t know why you’re not adding him either.  Fear of success?  That’s what you’re mom would say.  Don’t worry, she’d never say it to your face.

Matt Shoemaker – Drilled on the head by a line drive, and has a skull fracture.  At some point in the near-future, pitchers will be wearing helmets, and Whitey Ford is going to roll over in his casket.  I know Whitey isn’t dead, but he sleeps in a casket.  I don’t know why, you ask him.

J.C. Ramirez – 2 IP, 1 ER as he worked the 7th and 8th innings.  Oh, and Deolis Guerra worked the 2nd and 3rd innings.  And Andrew Bailey (1 IP, 0 ER) worked the 9th for the save.  This is a joke perpetuated by The Sciosciapath.  Since Shoemaker was knocked out early, it’s hard to say who gets the next Angels save, or even if there is one.  I’d put Bailey first, but I wouldn’t put Bailey on any of my teams with his 6+ ERA.

Taijuan Walker – 2/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 4.60.  For 2017, do I hear a sleeper four years in a row?!

Tom Murphy – 2-for-2 and his 1st home run as he came in as a pinch-hitter.  Above Boston yesterday light clouds floated by, and between those pillowy bridges to heaven someone wrote, “I love Tom Murphy.”  Only it wasn’t a skywriter, Prospector Ralph had an orgasm.

Raimel Tapia – 3-for-5, 1 run and his 1st steal.  He led off in place of Blackmon, though a lot of fans thought there was no change.  Tapia looks like he could step in right now and not miss a beat with 10+ HR, 30+ SB, .300+ potential.  You know why?  Coors.  For this year, you’ll just need to watch to see if he’s in the lineup.   For next year:  let’s hope Blackmon’s gone this offseason.

Kevin Gausman – 6 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.58, and now has a 19 inning scoreless streak.  Nice, doode, way to start ramping up your 2017 price tag.  I streamed him for Saturday’s start, and dropped him when I saw the Stream-o-Nator didn’t like his next start.

Michael Pineda – 4 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 5.10.  He will forever be known as Michael Piñata.

Chris Archer – 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 9 Ks, ERA at 4.06.  It’s time for everyone’s favorite game that you didn’t even realize was a game!  What did Grey get vs. his trade partner?  So, about two months ago, I traded the White Mountain, JB, Archer for David Price.  In 69 2/3 IP, Archer has 3 Wins/3.49/1.03/85 vs. Price’s 6 Wins/2.84/1.19/73 in 82 1/3 IP.  (I also threw in Cishek, which was awful for The White Mountain, but we’ll ignore that because I won the trade anyway.)  In my top 100 for the 2nd half, I told everyone my number one buy was Price.

J.A. Happ – 2 2/3 IP, 3 ER, ERA up to 3.34 and his 4th straight poor start.  Shizz Happ-ens.

Steven Wright – May not pitch again this year due to lingering shoulder soreness.  Shoulder?  I thought the only thing a knuckleballer needed was fingernails and a large catcher’s mitt.  Basically, a manicurist with a giant labia.

Rick Porcello – 7 IP, 2 ER, 4 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.23 as he moved his record to 19-3.  Watch him win the Cy Young award in a year where not one starter in the AL gets any first place votes.

Eduardo Rodriguez – 8 IP, 0 ER, 1 Hit, 2 Walks, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.83.  Ed-Rod lost a no-hitter in the 8th inning with two outs because Hanley’s special brand of insouciance led him to not stretch on a close play at first.

Jharel Cotton – Will be recalled on Wednesday to face the Angels.  He was the prospect dealt in the Rich Hill deal.  A’s should’ve traded Hill for Blistex with a cotton swab.  Talk about the makings of terrific O. Henry story.  “Now we have Blistex and a cotton swab, and the Dodgers have Hill.  We should’ve never did that swab swap.  I will now sigh heavily.”  That’s O. Henry dealing with irony.  Cotton throws hard and is tiny, which works out well for major league pitchers once every few years.  I don’t think Cotton’s that once-a-few-years-type arm.  Angels aren’t a strong team, so could see a stream, but only if you really need it, nah’mean?  I’m a poet and I’m aware of it!

Kendall Graveman – 6 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.81, and his ERA at home is 2.64.  The Undertaker at home; The Thunder Down Under by accident when you meant to go to a strip club on the road.

Blake Snell – 6 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.39.  Where does he get drafted next year?  He feels like a guy ESPN and/or Yahoo say something like, “He has the chance to break out, but wins will be hard to come by.”  Yeah, well, no dur, except chance for a break out?  He has more Ks than IP and a 3.39 ERA in 74 1/3 IP.  What does a guy need to do to prove himself?  Damn, they are stupid!  *intern whispers in my ear*  Turns out I was getting mad at a hypothetical situation that may not happen.

Joe Musgrove – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 5.06.  Not to harp like Tupac’s current backup band, but Musgrove is doing what a rookie pitcher does, Snell is doing so much more.

Collin McHugh – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 4.96.  He didn’t make a raspberry with his lips.  At least not his face lips.  He had a lead early, then broke win’d.

Evan Gattis – 1-for-5 and his 24th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games.  You’ve definitely wanted to drop him at times, but, on the Player Rater, he’s easily a top 5 catcher.

Yu Darvish – 4 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 3.45.  September starts mean so much, and they don’t get much more useless than that.  To channel my inner Redd Foxx, thanks, Yu big dummy!

Rougned Odor – 3-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 29th homer, hitting .281.  That was his fifth homer in his last five games.  For those slow on the uptake, this is a 22-year-old 2nd baseman.

Vince Velasquez – 7 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 4.12, as the Phils shut him down for the season about three weeks too late.  Years and years of data say shut down a guy when he’s under 25 years of age and nearing 30+ innings from the previous year.  In 2015, he threw 89 IP.  This year:  136.  Sorry about your elbow, say the Phils to Velasquez next year.

Julio Teheran – 6 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.01 vs. Jake Thompson – 7 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners (4 BBs), 6 Ks, ERA at 6.48.  They billed this matchup as, “Jake and the Fatwa Man.”

Adonis Garcia – 0-for-5, but two home runs on Saturday (12, 13).  Wouldn’t call him my bae or even Teyana Taylor, who I’m liking in TV-MA ways, but I have enjoyed Adonis.

Tanner Roark – 5 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners (4 BBs), 3 Ks, ERA at 2.89.  It sure feels like Roark (and Duffy), two guys I’ve relied on for the better of the season are starting to wind down.  I’m gonna give them each one more start to see if they can turn things around, but I (we) might be out soon thereafter.  I believe Tony Robbins would call this blurb a stackable moment.  You know what I want with stackable moments?  A stack made of Legos, so they’re securely fastened, then at the bottom I want a very strong baby grip on them.  Like a baby that uses a grip strengthener.

Robert Gsellman – 6 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.87.  More like Gbuyman!  Amiright?!  Any hoo!  He gets the Braves next.  Don’t mind if I do!

Seth Lugo – 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.38.  Grey 2018 says, “Sucks that Lugo needs an elbow transplant.”  Kidding (not really).  Tomato-whatever for long term, I would stream him in all home games.

Alexei Ramirez – Was released by the Padres.  The Padres should have to write a 1500 word essay to their fans why they signed Ramirez in the first place, which is the only time Padres and first place is ever used in the same sentence.  Want more Padres doing some shizz?  They held Ramirez all year, and then released him after rosters expand.

Yangervis Solarte – 3-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 15th homer, and 2nd homer in three games.  Hot schmotato alert!

Clayton Kershaw – Will rejoin the Dodgers’ rotation on Friday.  Should say should (say that fast 117 times!) rejoin the rotation.  Don’t see why he wouldn’t unless he has an injury setback.

Jose De Leon – 6 IP, 4 ER, 6 baserunners (zero walks), 9 Ks as he was called up.  Surprised that he was promoted, the Dodgers only needed him for the last three months.  They only called up Urias three months ago and he’s only four years younger than De Leon.  Maybe the Dodgers were really trying to clinch that PCL playoff spot, because everyone knows that’s why major league teams do what they do, so their minor league teams can do well.  Oh, I know what you’re thinking, “The Dodgers must’ve had a reason, De Leon couldn’t have been pitching that well.”  Nah, in one of the most hitter-friendly environs in Triple-A, he only had a 2.61 ERA with a 11.6 K/9.  Yeah, not good at all. *holds finger up to head, squeezes finger trigger, realizes forgot to load finger*  Well, you get the point.

Yasiel Puig – 1-for-2, 3 runs, 3 RBIs and his 8th homer.  Don’t want to jinx anything but it looks like we might see the good Puig this month.

Yasmani Grandal – 2-for-2, 3 RBIs and his 23rd homer.  Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-but he was benched yesterday!  Ugh, I hate when I overmanage, which is what I did by moving Grandal to the bench for Contreras and his 13 innings of garbage.

Rich Hill – 6 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 1.94.  Like in professional wrestling, when a guy has a cut on his forehead, you keep beating on it until it’s completely open and gushing.  The Padres should’ve just went after the blister.  First hitter of the game for the Padres should’ve been, “Before I take my at-bat, may I shake your hand, Mr. Hill?”  Then bam, rip open the wound!

Jonathan Villar – Out with a sore knee, but he pinch-hit yesterday and hit a grand slam (12th HR).  Sonavabench!

Domingo Santana – 3-for-5, 3 runs and his 5th and 6th homers.  Damn, too bad he’s not named Toda la Semana Santana.  You can try him, but he’s only playing (and hitting) vs. lefties.

Keon Broxton – 2-for-5, hitting near-.350 in the last week, with four steals in the last eight games.  Still hasn’t lost that loving schmotato feeling.

Chris Carter – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 31st homer, and his 2nd homer in as many games, hitting .228.  If there was any justice, Carter would get a Ryan Howard-sized contract that a team would completely regret.

Gerrit Cole – Expected to return on September 12th.  I’ll tell you what, nothing cures a guy’s elbow like seven to nine days of rest.  Better than Tommy John surgery, if I may be so bold.

Jung Ho Kang – Will be activated from the DL today.  He’s excited to be back to face the Redbirds.  We’ll see how he feels when he realizes Redbirds isn’t girls he’s embarrassed by exposing himself.

Ivan Nova – 6 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 2.89 on Pirates (4.34 overall).  I streamed Nova in this start, and would again.  I also streamed PBS’s Nova on my app, because I’m old.  If my 15-year-old self could see me wanting to watch PBS, I’d get pantsed and punched.

Jose Fernandez – 5 2/3 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 3.03.  Please shut him down.  For the love that all is holy.  Which also goes for those of you reading this while peering through two bagels.

J.T. Realmuto – 1-for-4 and his 9th homer, hitting .311, and has two homers this weekend, three homers this week, two homers this month, nine homers this year, and you get the point.

Fernando Rodney – 2/3 IP, 3 ER and his 3rd blown save, and has given up five earned in his last two appearances.  I wish I could say I didn’t pick up A.J.Ramos, because he’s been getting knocked around recently too, but I did.  Such a glutton for SAGNOF.

Danny Salazar – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 11 Ks, ERA at 3.78.  Those Indians starters sure are mercurial.  Like a bunch of Latin women.

John Lackey – 5 IP, 1 ER, 2 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.36, as he was activated from the DL.  Not totally surprised to see him return looking solid, his injury felt like a “Let’s just rest that horse-toothed jackass, so we have him for the playoffs” type.

Michael Fulmer – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.77.  The theme of this post is shut down young pitchers.  Not as catchy as the Razzball podcast theme, but what is?  Hotline Bling?  It was rhetorical, Random Italicized Voice.

Jordan Zimmermann – Will be activated for September 10th vs. the Orioles.  Jordan had a better chance of surviving the Six Day War.

Daniel Norris – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.74.  Now, we’re down to wondering what a guy is going to do in his next start, and the Stream-o-Nator doesn’t like Norris’ next one, but, if we were thinking long-term, I called Norris a sleeper this past preseason, and will again this next one.

J.D. Martinez – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 20th homer.  Damn, I gotta feeling like the Black Eyed Peas that Just Dong is going to be undervalued next year.  By the hoo, you see that new video Black Eyed Peas are pushing to be their We Are The World?  Once you put a Kardashian in it, your gravitas goes to level Pluto.  The former planet or the Disney character.

Justin Upton – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 20th homer, hitting .239.  See what I said for Abreu, but imagine Upton played well for six months rather than six random weeks.

Alcides Escobar – 2-for-4 and his 5th homer, hitting .268.  Real bet, within three years, Alcides will be signed or traded to the Padres.  You know those sucka Padres are considering it.  C’mon, I’ll bet you the revenue of one webpage, about .00001 of a tenth of a penny.

Dan Straily – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 10 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.83.  I picked him up to stream him, but got a case of the chickens, and dropped him before lineups locked.  He had the kind of start that I’m not entirely sure I regret missing.  For Future reference, Jumpman.  For future reference for Straily, he has a sub-3 ERA at home.

Billy Hamilton – Out with a strained oblique.  Getting Hamilton tickets is easier than keeping Hamilton on the field.  He’s likely done for the year, but I’d hold him for another day to see what the Reds say.

Jose Peraza – 3-for-4, hitting .336.  Some of you don’t know what’s happening, que pasa.  He’s not for you anyway, Jose Peraza, Kid Frost.

Randal Grichuk – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 21st homer, hitting .231.  He won NL Player of the Month with 7 HRs and a .284 average.  (He didn’t really win it, but no one has any idea who wins PotM, so he could’ve.)

Mike Leake – Should be activated in the next day or so after battling shingles.  You know the best way to beat shingles?  Planking.

Aledmys Diaz – Started his rehab assignment in High-A Palm Beach.  After the game, he married a rich widow, invested in a company that is really a shadow company used to embezzle and hit Mizner Park to recreate Tucker Max stories.

  1. WM says:

    Dearest Grey,
    I need Dee Gordon to get on PEDs again. Please help out that little guy. Let the man juice!
    Also, it’s fantasy baseball playoffs, stop asking them to shut down Jose Fernandez. I need his Ks. I need Jose.
    Speaking of Jose, have you scheduled your follow up interview with Canseco? Part one was the greatest podcast interview ever. The people demand part 2.

  2. Scott says:

    Couple of questions.

    1. Do you think De Leon sticks in the rotation with Kershaw back?

    2. Hamilton has an oblique injury. Do you think this opens up every day ABs for Peraza?

    3. Cole returning on Sept 12. Cut or hold?

    4. If you had 5 closers and were first in saves, would you cut kintzler? I don’t like putting free saves out there. BUT I probably could use that spot for a pitcher to stream or a hot bat since bradley has been in a funk.

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Scott: 1. Maybe for another start or two, depends more on Bud Norris, Stripling and Urias 2. Yeah 3. Cut 4. Yes

  3. Jake says:

    Do you think Degrom pitches again this year? He is going to miss multiple starts. He won’t go on the DL since rosters expanded, which means he is taking up a spot on my roster that I can use. I am grimacing while I ask this, but would you cut him? Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Jake: Yeah, maybe…I wouldn’t count on it though

  4. ThE sHiT says:

    Playoff time. Recovering from a blow up on a Monday is not ideal obviously but Moore has been decent and he is one of my 3 two start guys. Are we starting Moore @ Coors 2moro? H2h league where i have one more move left for the week (picked up Luke and Finnegan for their two starts and Puig and Buxton).

    Good luck to everyone in the playoffs!

      • ThE sHiT says:

        @Grey: so we all know Moore will go 7 IP, 2 ER, 10K, 2 BBs…or get rocked for 8 ER in 3 IP lol

  5. Noam says:

    I second WM’s comment about Canseco. I think it was the funniest interview I’ve ever heard…

    Thanks to you I made it to my championship. Can you help me with some lineup questions?

    Fantasy Points, no penalty for Ks. W and QS are weighted for pitchers.

    Pick 2 hitters: 
    CJ Cron (3vTEX, [email protected]) – not great pitching match ups
    Mike Napoli (HOU, [email protected]) — cold, but 4 lefties. 
    Randal Grichuk (4vMIL, [email protected])
    Kole Calhoun (3vTEX, [email protected]) – had a nice week
    Jake Lamb (3vSF, [email protected]) – 4 tough lefties

    Pick 3 pitchers:
    Chad Kuhl (vSTL, vCIN)
    Jason Hammel (@MIL)
    Luke Weaver (vMIL, @PIT)
    Kevin Gausman (@DET)
    Jose de Leon (@MIA) — will he stick in the rotation?


    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Noam: Ha, thanks! Cron, Napoli, all good guys though…. Hammel, De Leon, Weaver

  6. VinWins

    VinWins says:

    Is Price that much better than Archer since the trade? That 1.19 WHIP vs 1.03 plus the edge in Ks must mitigate a lot of the ERA and Win domination.

    Murphy got another hit after you wrote his blurb. Also, Keon was 2/23 over 10 games before the last 2 in the Pitt series, so he had lost some of that loving feeling for me. I did pick him up again on a couple teams after that 3/4 with 2 SBs.

    And, I looked it up. The last Cardinal to win PotM was Pujols, August 2010. Third baseman Kris Bryant of the Chicago Cubs, starting pitcher Kyle Hendricks of the Cubs and second baseman-outfielder Trea Turner of the Washington Nationals have been voted the Budweiser Presents National League Player of the Month, National League Pitcher of the Month and National League Rookie of the Month, respectively.

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:

      @VinWins: yeah, but what’s the Tucks Medicated Pad player of the month?

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @VinWins: Yeah, so much better, subjectively at least… Oops on Murphy… Will fix, sorry

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @VinWins: I thought Murphy had come out of the game after his pinch hit

      • Ralph Lifshitz

        Ralph Lifshitz says:

        @Grey: Jeeeeez Grey get it right! Murphy is a Irish God raised on the Dropkick Murphy’s and soda bread!

  7. Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey says:

    AL only with OBP over AVG, total bases added. reddick losing playing time (we DON’T lose our players midseason when they are traded), him or almonte (who seems to play every day) or orlando? puig likely gonna chop off that playing time the way those cuban gangsters will if he doesn’t keep up with his payments.

    2. lost shoemaker, any of these better or just stream: albers, oberholtzer (replacing shoemaker), whoever replaces (a.warren maybe?), one of the OAK guys triggs,mengden, alcantara or cotton? i could drop shoemaker with assumption he’s out for year, since they might not DL him. or just wait and see if he’s only out like a week or so, our playoffs don’t start till next week.

  8. Donovan says:

    Need a QS and hopefully a W. Best Option for my final pitching slot this week? All are at home.
    H2H points:

    Taillon vs StL (Leake or Reyes)
    Desclafani vs Mets (Thor)
    Rodon vs KC (Ventura)


  9. Bob says:

    I added deleon for his start against san diego. The k’s were nice and the “W”, no walk too. But 4 runs. I need QS and better ratios. This was against one of the worst offenses in the league. Not sure I trust him. Not sure if he even is starting anymore with Kershaw returning. Would you cut him for Cobb? Cobb had a decent outing vs. Toronto. He only went 5 with 84 pitches. I’d expect the pitch count to ramp up. TB is using a 6 man rotation now and Cobbs schedule is ok , no boston or baltimore. I see NYY twice, @ Tor (sit), @ white sox, @ Tex.

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Bob: I wouldn’t mess with Cobb

  10. Kevin says:

    I took a shot on buxton to use at dh while big papi sits at San diego. I own bradley who has been pretty cold for most of the 2nd half. Puig is available. Would you drop bradley for puig? I need runs, hr, obp most. Bradley has been dropped in the order too. Thx

  11. Glorious says:

    Need 2 OFs start this week. Head to Head Points:

    Dexter Fowler (at Mil and at Hou)
    Polanco (home vs Cards and Reds)
    Buxton (home vs KC and Cleveland)

    Or pick up a Pagan or Kendrys on waiver wire based on this weeks matchups? SF at Coors and Arizona this week.

    Great advice all year – thanks for the help.

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Glorious: Polanco (home vs Cards and Reds)
      Buxton (home vs KC and Cleveland)

  12. Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:

    20 team h2h playoffs starting, also have defensive stats like putouts and assists and double plays etc.
    drop either of
    franklin 3.3 vs ubaldo today (-1.7 for the week and against 2 lefties, where he sits)
    h.kendrick -8.2 vs greinke today (-1.2 for the week)
    for any of:
    lee vs hamels (-.6 for week against 3 lefties including today and actually plays 1b for putouts), but he kills lefties.

  13. Bob says:

    Cobb is available. Should I cut Deleon for him? I am looking for ratios and qs with some K. Cobb went 5 last time and should get his pitch count up. TB going with a 6 man rotation. Cobbs schedule isn’t too bad. Not sure if De Leon will reman in the rotation. He also faced with padres and gave up 4 er. The win and k’s were nice but not exactly what I wanted.

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Bob: Meh

  14. chris says:

    Would you cut Bradley who is slumping for Puig? I am looking for r, hr and OBP. Bradley has been dropped back to 9th in the order.

  15. Malicious Phenoms says:

    50 (+16) player blurbs of Grey..Magnifico Maestro!

  16. eric says:

    Nominations open for the MHOTY GRAY LMAO Line-Of-The-Year

    Category: A Grey one-liner describing a player who reminded us most of the phrase: fantasy is hell

    “Michael Pineda – 4 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 5.10. He will forever be known as Michael Piñata”

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @eric: Thanks!

  17. Seth Trapani says:

    Rest of season, redraft league. Alex Reyes, Jose DeLeon, Rob Gsellmen, or Seth Lugo?

    • Seth Trapani says:

      pick 2 of the above…

  18. RicoSuave says:

    Awesome work Grey!

    14 team H2H weekly points league… I made it through the first week of playoffs(even though I lost another SP) please help!

    I need to start 5 SP and 3 RP (I have a few SP/RP eligible)

    Which ones do you recommend I start?

    Maeda (SP) Vs ARI & @ MIA;
    Alex Reyes (SP/RP) @ PIT;
    J. Guerra (SP/RP) @ STL;
    Carrasco (SP) Vs HOU;
    Salazar (SP) @ MIN;
    Taillon (SP) Vs STL;
    Rodon (SP) Vs KC;
    Bundy (SP/RP) @ TB;
    Duffy (SP/RP) @ MIN;
    K. Giles (RP) 4X @ SEA & 3x @ LAA;
    Dyson (RP) 4x @ CLE & 3x Vs CHC;

    I guess it’s safe to drop Shoemaker right?

    Thanks a lot for your help!

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @RicoSuave: Drop Shoemaker…. Maeda, Duffy, Taillon, Salazar, Giles, Dyson, Rodon, Carrasco

      • RicoSuave says:

        @Grey: Thanks so much again!

  19. TacktheKack says:

    Hey Grey, need some advice…

    1. I won my first round of playoffs despite K Davis only getting me 4 TB. Should I stick with him in my utility banking on the law of averages or pickup Cron or take a flyer on Puig or Buxton and bench Davis?

    2. Pick two: L. Weaver (@pit, mil), hammel (@mil), salazar (@min) or bauer(hou)? my league has k and k/9 so weaver and hammel’s mil matchups are attractive, as is bauer’s houston start. salazar seems to be turning it around but he did get shelled his last time at minn. Thinking weaver with his two starts and salazar.


  20. Racehorse says:

    “Albert Pujols – 3-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 29th homer, after hitting two homers on Saturday. Because he eats plantar fasciitis for breakfast! Hope that’s scrambled eggs between his toes”

    The Machine’s toe-jam is powering my dynasty team’s play-off run.

    mmmm… toe-jam

  21. Josh-NYC says:

    Hey Grey,

    I had my worst offensive week this past week, a week before the playoffs are going to start. My first weeks opponent is very pitching heavy. I will need to add another pitcher, as well as swap one of my bats.

    So here’s the task:
    1) which batter do you drop to add a pitcher?
    2) after you drop the initial batter, do you drop a second batter for CJ Cron, Keon Broxton, Plouffe, or gyorko?
    3) do you drop Sanchez for grandal?

    C: Sanchez
    1b: e5
    2b: Murphy
    3b: Frazier
    SS: Seager
    Of: starlin Marte, Khris Davis, Dahl
    Util: votto, yasmany
    Bench: moncada, Hernan Perez

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Josh-NYC: 1. Moncada 2. Nah 3. Nah

  22. Huddy says:

    Last H2H category week to secure 1st round bye
    A. I have JoFer Kluber Carrasco Darvish RP: Jansen Melancon Kimbrel…start 2 start Luke Weaver (@PIT MIL) or throw in another RP either Giles or Diaz
    B. Start 3 of 4…Grichuk Inciarte Moncada HPerez
    Thanks again!

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Huddy: A. Weaver B. Not Moncada

  23. the swinging says:

    That villar situation was brutal. Sounded like he would be out a few games, so I picked up starlin castro and benched villar. So I used one of my limited season moves remaining to add and start a guy who went 0-4, and bench a guy who went 1-1 with a grand slam.

    Just keep pouring on the pain fantasy gods, real thick.

  24. Malicious Phenoms says:

    HAPPY LABOR DAY to ALL you hard working Americans!

  25. iso says:

    drop kinztler for bailey?

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @iso: Sure

  26. dom says:

    hey grey

    Wil Myers has struggled over the past month, who do you like for ROS in an avg/obp/slg league? and who do you like best for tonight?

    Dahl (Moore), Cron (@Alcantara), Buxton (Kennedy), Peraza (Colon)

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @dom: Dahl in Coors, Cron

      • dom says:

        @Grey: so would you drop Brad Miller or Wil Myers for Dahl? 10 team redraft with playoffs running through Sept

        • Grey

          Grey says:

          Both? Miller

          • dom says:

            @Grey: thanks. would you drop Myers for Buxton or Peraza or Puig?

            • Grey

              Grey says:


  27. ism says:

    Drop which guy for these free agents/ have this week and a 1st round bye by so looking ahead a couple weeks for my roster.

    grichuk (plays in coors the last 3 days of the semi finals), plouffe, adonis, espinosa, alcides, wilmer flores, jefry marte, andrew toles, steve pearce, solarte, domingo, parra


    C Grandal
    1b belt (looking to drop plays in coors next 3 days)
    2b schoop
    3b frazier
    ss lindor
    if franco
    of trout, jd martinez, marte, kepler
    util trea turner, asdrubal
    bench jankowski, yoan moncada
    dl stanton, bour

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @ism: Jank, Asdrubal…Grichuk, Adonis

  28. Phil of the Future says:

    Happy Labor Day, bud.
    Carter’s homer yesterday put me into a control my own destiny matchup this week for a playoff berth. It just feels right.
    Except of course for my entire pitching staff dropping like flies. Come back soon, Cobbler….


    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @Phil of the Future: You too! Out of curiosity, I just Googled Lynda Carter, she looks great for 70!

  29. Jerry says:

    Need to decide on one of these guys for my DH this week:

    Adam Duvall, Byron Buxton, Yoan Moncada

    Thanks Grey!

    • Jerry Huntley says:

      @Jerry: I guess I should mention this a standard H2H league. I am playing the #1 seed this round, so looking for the best shot at big production.

      • Jerry Huntley says:

        @Grey: Thanks Grey!!!

        • Grey

          Grey says:

          No problem

  30. Carlos says:

    Time for playoffs with limited roster moves… My starting pitching is weakest part of my time. Safe to assume I should drop Shoemaker and look elsewhere?

  31. Harrison Ford in Air Force One says:


    Made it to the playoffs for the 2nd straight year since reading Razzball, so thanks to you and the team for all the great insight.

    Pretty conflicted with my hitters and could use your help. Standard 5×5 H2H. Week 1 of a 2 week matchup.

    A. Pick one infielder of the following:
    -Franco (@MIA3, @WSH4, $16) — has been garbage lately
    -Cron (@OAK3, TEX3, $1.0)
    -Moncada (@SD3, @TOR3, -$8.6) — is he gonna play everyday?
    -Schoop (@TB3, @DET3, $4.5)

    B. Pick 2 utility players of the following:
    -Lorenzo Cain (@MIN3, @CWS3, $9.2) — has sat out for 4 straight games as he waits for the cortisone shot to take full effect. Yost says he’s hopeful Cain will play today but who knows?
    -Justin Upton (@CWS3, BAL3, $12.5) — does he keep it going?
    -Puig (ARI3, @MIA3)
    -Buxton (KC3, CLE3)


  32. John says:

    7 moves per week playoffs. Tron loves Peraza.
    I have a good feeling that Kendrys is breaking out too so I could be adding two guys. I could drop Schoop, Napoli, Franco or Moss. And would be down to four moves. Hold? Add one? Add both?

    • Grey

      Grey says:

      @John: Franco, Moss

  33. Marty Jannetty_Was Set Up says:

    Brother Grey, thanks again for putting out the best fantasy baseball content on the inter-webs this season (every season!).

    I’m gearing up for the playoffs and chasing a 3 peat in my most important (to me) league. As with everyone else, much has changed over the last month and I’m needing some optimization advice.

    C – Contreras
    1B – Pujols
    2B – Schoop
    3B – Kris Bryant
    SS – Ian Desmond
    MI – Yoan Moncada
    CI – Freddie Freeman
    OF – Harper, Springer, Marte, Carlos Gonzalez, Byron Buxton (dropped Ozuna for him Thursday, no regrets)
    U – Rendon
    Bench: Brandon Belt

    SP: Syndergaard, Darvish, Skaggs, de Leon, Gausman, DeSclafani, Bundy, Walker, Paxton, Robbie Ray.
    RP: Colome, Thornberg, Cody Allen

    Do you think Buxton’s good to go the rest of the season as a permanent OF, or was he just a weekend buy?

    Would you hold Moncada for a playoff run considering I could move Rendon into the MI slot and stream anyone else in the U slot? Anyone worth rostering in place of Moncada if so?

    SON Like T. Walker’s start against Texas…is the machine crazy or does the FML concur?

    Bucholz starts Tuesday against the Padres. I’ve been burned streaming him so many times in the past…but this is for a digital online trophy, a real life WWF replica heavy weight belt, a decent amount of money, and shaming my bosses for another fall season. Do you pull the trigger against the Padres?

    Belt was a Sell Friday before the concussion risk…should I drop him now or give him a shot at Coors (and then drop him)?

    Thanks again!

    • Marty Jannetty_Was Set Up says:

      @Marty Jannetty_Was Set Up: SON likes Andriesse and Berrios today. Drop Gausman and Bundy to grad them now, or do you think there are better options out there later on the week? 12 start maximum in the league I’m inquiring about.