Please see our player page for Byron Buxton to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

Tyler Naquin. Is that an official sentence? Anyone? Typically I wouldn’t be buying into him, but allow me to explain why I have picked him up in two of my primary leagues. In one league I have Ketel Marte on the IL, but since I have David Fletcher on bench I was able to plug him into my 2B spot. By the way, you should all own Fletcher considering I insisted upon it prior to drafts. And this was exactly why. His draft day price tag was well below his actual value and to have him on your bench just in case made him a great draft day buy. Fletcher isn’t off to a great start by any means, but with 42 plate appearances, only Mark Canha, Marcus Semien and Jose Altuve have stepped into the batters box more often this season. The more plate appearances, the more opportunity for points. The Angels are in the top five teams for runs scored and being at the top of that lineup provides a promising outlook. But this opening paragraph was supposed to be about Naquin and why I’ve added him to my rosters. The simple answer is because I had the bench spot to see where this hot streak ends with Ketel to the IL in one league and Quintana to scrap heap in another. Tyler Naquin leads all hitters in fantasy points. That’s certainly not going to last for long, but I wasn’t going to let someone else benefit from another week or two of potential points. And if I get the chance, I will we include him into a trade to sweeten the deal. Worst case scenario is that I drop him in two weeks.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Just Dong Just Dong Just Dong Just Dong Just Dong…oh, and Just Dong. Then, when you get tired, and wanna go home, Just Dong some more.” That was the guy who hired Quasimodo to ring the bell at Notre Dame. It was also the Red Sox yesterday. Leading the Red Sox yesterday in the Just Dong parade of Just Dongers was none other than, you guessed it, Just Dong Martinez (4-for-6, 4 runs, 4 RBIs), who hit his 3rd, 4th and 5th homers, as he hits .472. Hey, Preseason Grey who hated J.D. Martinez, you suck. Always seem to get myself in trouble when I try to time the end of guys’ productiveness, rather than just going with guys until they’re no longer liable. Whit Merrifield and Nelson Cruz come to mind, too. So, I trust Just Dong now, right? Well, no, not entirely, but I also can’t point to any reason not to trust him, so process of elimination tells me, he’s a younger version of Nelson Cruz. Call him Nelson Dongz. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

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The season is a week old which means we finally have some real data to analyze. So let’s overreact to all of it.  The best part about the early weeks of the season are the lesser known guys come out swinging and light the world on fire. First on the list is Akil Baddoo who is here to save your fantasy season. If you haven’t picked him up yet, stop reading right now and go grab him. You can ride the molten lava hot start while it lasts. Naturally the average will come down at some point but the power should remain and he has the tools to be stay in your lineup all season. He’s taking the league by storm after smacking a home run in his first at bat with his parents in the stands. It’s Baddoo’s world and we’re all just fortunate to be living in it. 

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I’m still not convinced Yermin Mercedes isn’t a LARP. Or a Transformer. His name really is Yermin Mercedes? Just out here with a name that sounds like a German saying German Mercedes? And he doesn’t wear a Mercedes emblem around his neck like Flavor Flav? Is this real life or a simulation? The White Sox lost Eloy and just randomly found a guy who can do exactly the same? Right, right, okay, so the story I heard about one fantasy baseballer hearing the news of Eloy’s injury while on the Mercedes-Benz factory tour and crying onto a C-Class, and that transforming into Yermin, was a lie? I don’t hear lies, I hear truths! So, Yermin Mercedes went 2-for-4 and hit another home run (2nd) yesterday, and has basically done what we would’ve hoped for from Andrew Vaughn in our wildest dreams. But can it continue? Ah, excellent leading question! Yes, Yermin can hit .550. No! Of course not! He does have a solid hit tool (can hit .280) and good power (20-ish homers). The moment he slumps and Vaughn hits (it’ll happen — hopefully for my teams) Yermin will be on the outside, while Vaughn moves in. There is a chance Mercedes could hit 25 homers/.280, which is essentially Trey Mancini-type projections, so he’s worth rostering for now. tl;dr: Mercedes goes vroom, vroom, make room. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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It seemed like a nothing move at the time. Just a transactional move that people would forget about within hours, if not minutes. Just ten days ago, the Nats announced they would be demoting Carter Kieboom. Then, before leaving town, Carter Kieboom watered down all the hand sanitizer. Now Patrick Corbin, Yan Gomes, Josh Bell, Brad Hand (ah HA!), Will Harris, Josh Harrison, Alex Avila, Jon Lester, Jordy Mercer and Kyle Schwarber are all on the IL, as the Nats recalled Luis Garcia and Kieboom. “Kieboom goes my flight to the minors!” That’s Carter Kieboom as he mixed a cocktail of Palmolive and Capri Sun into the hand sanitizer bottles. “These stupid straws!” That’s Kieboom struggling to get the juice out of the plastic-metal pouches. Wow, Kieboom is not being very stealth. So, it sucks if you had Hand, Schwarber, Corbin, Bell…Well, the guys there you might’ve had. Hopefully, they all return shortly. For all these moves, the only guy I grabbed in leagues was Tanner Rainey, who might now get saves, but Daniel Hudson is also there, so that’s a crapshoot too. “All these crapshoots and I should clean my hands…Hey, why does this soap smell like tropical punch?” Off to the side, snickering, “More like Crappy Sun!” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Who doesn’t wish they had a true story to tell like the night an unlicensed Les Anderson had when he snuck out and took his grandfather’s 1972 Cadillac Sedan de Ville in order to impress his crush. After she passes out, the night takes a wild turn as a joyride results in the Cadillac taking quite the beating. Gotta love when the old, wasted dude gets behind the wheel and somehow manages not to die. And let’s be honest, for those of you that have seen the movie multiple times, who hasn’t thought about Les’s drive to get his pregnant mom to the hospital when you were driving in reverse for a longer than normal stretch? But I think my favorite part of the movie is when the grandfather opens the garage door to get his car, takes one look at the beat to sh!t Caddy, and says “what in the hell is that?”.  Just another awesome Corey Haim/Corey Feldman 80’s flick for you. One of many. RIP Les Anderson. By the way, I tried looking up who played the old drunk and I think his name is Henry Alan Miller. Shockingly, his role was apparently uncredited.  How can that be? Just look at this performance!

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Baseball watchers are funny, right? Corbin Burnes (6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 1 hit, 11 Ks) was absolutely dazzling. I’m talking one of the best performances of the young season. Everyone was talking about him. Just filth and people wanted that filth rubbed in their eye balls. “Is that eye black?” “No, it’s Burnes’s filth. I applied it myself.” That was everyone. But why was no one talking about Jose Berrios? He matched Burnes, then one-upped him with a 6 IP, 0 ER, 0 hits, 12 Ks, performance. Is that, oh, I don’t know, as I pause here for emphasis, not good? Both of these guys were fantastic, but one of them gave up a home run to Byron Buxton, and one of them was Jose Berrios. Early season overreaction alert! Both of these guys are going to be top 20 starters this year, but only one of them (Burnes) is being treated that way. Berrios is a safer bet for a huge season, and might actually be able to throw 175+ IP this year. Joe Berry has been berry berry good to me. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

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*rubs ancient lamp, a blue genie appears* I have three wishes for this baseball season. My first wish is “No one I own get hurt.” I didn’t draft Dinelson Lamet, Josh Donaldson or Trevor Rosenthal, so I made your job easy for you, great, powerful Genie. My 2nd wish is “Everyone I drafted do well.”  I drafted Juan Soto, Trevor Story and Alec Bohm, so, really, I’m doing much of the heavy lifting for this wish too. My 3rd and final wish is “All defensive shifts are eight catchers stacked on top of each other like a totem pole.” Thanking you in advance, Genie. Wait a second, you’re not a genie, you’re Bartolo Colon in Blue Man Group paint. Damn you!

Okay, breathe in, breathe out. Take a moment. Really feel the ground below your feet. The air in your lungs. The soon-turds in your lower intestine. You’re alive. That’s the feeling. April baseball, you giant love muffin! I missed you so much. I’d get choked up, but I cried out all my tears at Luis Castillo’s start. Remember, the only thing you really should take away from yesterday’s player performances is:  It’s one game. Anyway, here’s what I saw yesterday for fantasy baseball:

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The season is almost upon us which means it’s time to get your rosters all dialed in for the season. So, who’s set to breakout and who’s set to break our hearts. Breakouts are guys that I think will outperform their draft position. Heart breakers as you can guess, are the opposite. Guys that you have to spend a high pick to acquire that will only make you regret your decision. In most cases it’s not that I wouldn’t touch any of them with a 10 foot pole, but I don’t think they’ll return the investment required to roster them.  You don’t win  your league at the draft but a bad first or second pick can hamstring your team. 

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One time. That’s all I’m asking for. One time where all the BABIPs and xWOBACONs in the universe align to propel me to the $150,000 grand prize in the NFBC Main Event. I understand that I’m a huge long shot, especially given the fact that it’s my first time in this contest. But remember that movie Little Giants, where a bunch of rag-tag underdogs coached by Rick Moranis went on to beat the clearly superior Cowboys? That movie gives me hope that even the biggest long shots can come through sometimes. One of the pivotal moments in the Giants’ upset victory was when Rudy Zolteck let out a huge fart and cleared the running lanes for Johnny “Viper” Vennaro.  I may not be planning to let out any massive farts during the draft (unless I accidentally pick Hyun-Jin Ryu) but I do think there’s a path for things to fall into place and for me to take down the overall. Another thing Little Giants taught me is the importance of preparation. While they had the Annexation of Puerto Rico playcall queued up for the game’s most important moment, I’ll have my “Mapping out the Main Event” pulled up throughout my draft.  This is the 3rd and final installment of that series, where I take you through rounds 9-1 and provide you with the finished hypothetical product. If you’ve missed out on the first two parts of this series, check them out here and here. Remember y’all, we’re building this team backwards with a focus on constructing a balanced team that can compete in all 10 roto categories. I’ll give you my main target in each round as well as outline  one back-up option if I miss on my main target. Let’s get to it. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?