Yesterday, Jackson Merrill went 2-for-4 with his 14th homer, 2nd homer in two games, four homers in four games. Okay, but what you really want to talk about is how Luis Rengifo homered — a tomato is thrown, and it connects — Bull’s eye to side of my head. Ow! What? Rengifo could do something–A barrage of tomatoes. So many tomatoes the council of pizzaiolos in Napoli puts up a sign, “Oopsie-daisy, no pizza today.” Okay, okay, okay! But it was Rengifo’s 1st homer, that’s significant–The entire Eastern seaboard says no pizza today, they’re throwing them at Grey’s head. Fine! I’ll talk about Jackson Merrill. He’s hot. But is he as hot as Luis Rengifo–I’m kidding! Geez! Merrill’s K% is too high; he’s being killed by fastballs; his exit velocity is a bit too low and I’m reminded of my reservations on him when he quote-unquote broke out. And that’s me quote-unquoting myself! The ceiling does not feel that high. The good news, and there is some. His bat speed is up; his Hard% is up and he’s hitting the ball as well as when he was “good,” and stealing much more. You could look up at the end of the year, and he might just have a 25/30/.250 season. That’s only worse on average compared to his rookie breakout. So. Dot dot dot. Do we think he’s better than Luis Rengifo? What?! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Michael King – 6 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.24 vs. Martin Perez – 4 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 3.38. This was a matchup of, “I wish I had more pitchers like these two schmohawks that I supposedly don’t like.”
Gerrit Cole – 7 IP, 3 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 11 Ks, ERA at 3.92. For a brief moment on Wednesday, I thought we were getting a no-hitter from Cole. Still was dynamite. That’s TNT, with Charmed, Cold Case, All Elite Wrestling, etc.
Max Fried – 5 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.97 as he was activated from the IL. Kevin from ESPN’s “Get Him In Your Lineup” Department said, “Can’t believe I wasn’t a part of the layoffs, to be honest.”
Ben Rice – 1-for-9, 3 RBIs and his 30th homer. Rice-a-HRoni!
Jacob Gonzalez – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 4th homer. In yesterday’s afternoon lineup, it was Nick Gonzales (4-for-8, 3 runs and his 6th homer), then Jacob Gonzalez, which led to them being listed as N. Gonzales and J. Gonzalez, and that made them N.J. Gonzalez/es, and I think that’s beautiful. I raise my Pork Roll and cheese to you. Get your Taylor Ham out of here though. It’s Pork Roll!
Bubba Chandler – 6 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.47. Heard someone say the Yankees might need some offensive firepower added at the deadline to which I said, “Might!” so loud it was heard within a 200-mile radius.
Mitch Keller – 5 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 4.90, and out at 75 pitches. In my fantasy fantasy world, where we can remove starters from the game before their managers, I would’ve taken Keller out after five shutties too. Me [handshake emoji] LL Donkey.
Jose Ramirez – 2-for-5, 2 RBIs as he was activated from the IL. Kevin from ESPN’s “Get Him In Your Lineup” Department said, “Seriously, you kept me over Karl Ravech?”
Kyle Manzardo – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 11th homer. In his short career, he seems to go from zero to schmotato fairly fast, so if you want to jump on quickly, I can see it.
Trevor Larnach – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 8th homer, as he hit leadoff, because the Twins are in Eff It Mode.
Brooks Lee – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 15th homer. Sometimes you just gotta Be Water.
Jake Bennett – 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 hits, zero walks, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.58. No reason to not get in — submit, weakling! — just know it could come crashing down. As I sorta said previously, “He’s got a 6.4 K/9, 1.4 BB/9, and 46.2% ground ball rate, so prone to BABIP misfires, but can battle through Fenway because of the heavy ball.” And that’s me sorta quoting me but updating the stats!
Ceddanne Rafaela – 2-for-8, 2 runs and his 9th homer. Wherever you think he is on the Player Rater, he’s higher. Well, unless you think he’s crazy high.
Brayan Bello – 5 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 5.60. No, unless you have marbles in your melon.
Christian Encarnacion-Strand – 3-for-8, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer and 2nd homer in as many games. Every time I’m out, CES pulls me back in!
Samuel Basallo – Hit the IL with a shoulder inflammation. Perhaps it’s me being a foolish little dummy, but, since Basallo thought he might avoid the IL stint at first, it gives me hope it will be a minimum stay, and not as ominous as a shoulder can be, and, as I type it out, I’m still worried.
Kyle Bradish – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.49. Hunh, I was told the Red Sox were good.
Nolan Arenado – 1-for-1, 3 runs and his 14th homer, 2nd homer in four games. Yeah, of course I have an immaculate collection of Chinese take-out menus I’ve been arranging by geographical distance from my house. Let’s eat, friend! Come here, the menus are by this open window–NOOOO!!! Torenado!
Gabriel Moreno – 1-for-4, 2 runs and his 7th homer. Yo Gabby Gabby is hitting .286 for his career. That’s not nothing. His power and speed are the nothings.
Corbin Carroll – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 15th homer. Don’t have him anywhere, so I wouldn’t mind if he had one of the worst post-All-Star Breaks in history to get a discount next year, but I wouldn’t expect that. I expect Carroll will be better in the 2nd half, as he moves further away from the hamate surgery.
Ryan Waldschmidt – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and a home run. He’s been in the league for a while. He has 130 ABs in the majors. Guess how many homers he has. Bzzt! Wrongo! This was his first major league homer. Was it a Wald-scrapper? HAHAHA I don’t know, but thank you for that pun!
James McCann – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 3rd homer. At least he’s not Matt McLain.
Jeff McNeil – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 4th homer. This week’s Buy/Sell is already on the Patreon and, while writing it, I saw McNeil had been hot and I absolutely did not include him. Have some self-respect, I said to myself, you’re a very dignified fantasy baseball blogger.
J.T. Ginn – Hit the IL with a middle finger blister. Only other place that sidelines someone is as a trucker in Jersey.
Gage Jump – 4 2/3 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 4.42. For what it’s Wuertz, I dropped Jump in the one league where I had him. I was only starting him in road games, and he just wasn’t on the road enough recently for me, but he has been good on the road. Ya know, outside of yesterday.
Bryan De La Cruz – 1-for 2 and his 1st homer. I saw “De La Cruz” hit a home run in a box score, and thought I had the Reds’ box score open, so I started doing Bowser with Sha Na Na about Elly with my bicep, then realized it was Bryan De La Cruz and was like, “Where he been?” Apparently, the minors, which is a little crazy since he went 21/5/.233 in the majors in 2024. Seems like a solid NL-Only flyer with playing time concerns, i.e., he didn’t even stay in yesterday’s game where he homered. Not quite ready for mixed leagues yet.
Alec Bohm – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 13th homer, and 2nd homer in four games. Also, 2nd time in four days that his mother disguised her voice as Alec’s and bought a house on Redfin.
Max Muncy – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 20th homer, and 2nd homer in two games. Did he get even newer glasses? He should keep getting stronger glasses until he’s wearing microscopes on his eyes.
Dalton Rushing – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 11th homer. The latest on Will Smith from the Dodgers is, “You mean the actor?”
Griffin Jax – 6 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.89. This was vs. the Jays, and I Streamonator’d Jax because the Jays suck. They left it all on the field in last year’s World Series. Literally. Their bats, gloves, arms. All of it.
Alejandro Kirk – 2-for-3 and his 3rd homer. Someone must’ve thrown him a meatball.
Kyle Teel – His ankle sprain timetable is eight weeks. That is the world’s longest woof.
Cam Cauley – 1-for-3 and his 1st homer. Just gave you my Cam Cauley fantasy. It was written without wasting any paper.
Jeremy Pena – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 9th homer, and 2nd homer in two games, and third homer in three games. Replacing ‘I won’t do what you tell me’ in Killing in the Name of with, “My beautiful Pena! My beautiful Pena! Uh-uh! My beautiful Pena! My beautiful Pena!”
Yordan Alvarez – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 34th homer. I’ve come to terms with having him nowhere this year, after having him everywhere last year for his terrible season. It’s called maturity, try it some time.
Isaac Paredes – 2-for-4 and his 14th homer, and 2nd homer in two games. Oh my, is this the hot streak we’ve been promised? Finally?
Peter Lambert – 6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.03. Went back to look at my most recent mentions of Lambert and they go like, “I keep looking at Lambert and I wish I liked him more,” and I’m still searching him and still wishing for more, but you just have to roster a guy at a certain point who is going well until they no longer are.
Seiya Suzuki – 1-for-4 and his 17th homer, and 2nd homer in three games. Seiya ball!
Spencer Torkelson -2-for-3, 3 runs and his 19th homer, 3rd homer since the break, and his 4th and 5th hit, as he hits .209. Wow!
Keider Montero – 5 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.14. Nearly made the lede about Keider, but his numbers are so ferociously meh. They’re fer-meh in my Barkin bags where I put the dogs. (Grey’s doing puns for the ladies!)
Hao-Yu Lee – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 5th homer. I like any guy who, when I say his name, it sounds like I’m calling him.
JJ Bleday – 1-for-4 and his 17th homer, hitting .237. Somebody heard the slander! That’s all I ask, hear the slander and react with a bone to pick.
Sal Stewart – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 21st homer. I know fantasy and reality are not synonymous. Though, I have a human-sized rabbit that would tell you otherwise. But I don’t get how Wetherholt is the odds-on favorite for NL ROY, and not Sal.
Emerson Hancock – 6 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.16. Briefly got out on Hancock, and that’s when the charges came. The fan chants of CHARGE, what did you think I meant? Any hoo! Hancock’s around a top 30 starter on the year; he should not be in a question of, “Grey, whatever’s sitting on your shoulders is great, but do you think I should drop Hancock?”
CJ Abrams – 4-for-5, 1 run and his 16th steal, hitting .286. Gonna name my firstborn, Corange Juice Junior. CoJuJu!
Cade Cavalli – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.58. In Coors? Puts fingertips to lips and makes loud, echoing MUAH!
Luis Garcia Jr. – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 21st homer. Wearing tribal face paint, about to spear a pig, “LuGaJu! LuGaJu! LuGaJu!”
Marcus Semien – 1-for-3 and his 10th homer, hitting .209. Fun fact! I had towels in high school I called Marcus Semien.
Brett Baty – 1-for-2 and his 6th homer, hitting .223. Legit thought he retired. Or…[looking at his stats]…maybe he did.
Jacob Misiorowski – Welp, turns out he will start on Sunday. Hopefully this is the last IO Update until the weekend.
Logan Henderson – 5 IP, 2 ER, 5 hits, zero walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 3.05. Brewers should see what they can do with Patrick Corbin. I’d be curious if they can turn him into a number three.
Casey Schmitt – 1-for-4 and his 20th homer, 4th homer in July, but hitting around .225 in that time. Schmitt happens!
Landen Roupp – 6 IP, 2 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.93. Actually, bit surprised at how good he looks under the hood — 9.3 K/9, 3.7 BB/9, 3.61 xFIP and 50.9% GB rate. That’s pretty usable in most mixed leagues, tee be aitch.
Seth Lugo – 7 IP, 3 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.36. Long-time, big-time, adult-boy, purchaser-of-hyphens, fan-of-Lugo, but I wouldn’t even Streamonator him. Don’t trust him anymore.
Salvador Perez – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 14th homer, and 2nd homer in three games, and third homer since the break. Maybe the time off during the break helped refresh his 78-year-old gams. Who would’ve guessed playing 155+ games a year, and sometimes 145+ games catching, would have long-term consequences?
Bobby Witt Jr. – Hit the IL with back pain. Meh, that’s okay, I have Brayan Rocchio. [waves bye-bye as I walk onto a freeway wearing a potato sack]
Nate Pearson – Traded to the Royals. Guess he was a Pearson of interest. [giant cane grabs at my waist, but I fend it off while moving to the other side of the stage] Right, folks…[cane continues after me]
JJ Wetherholt – 1-for-4 and his 15th homer. hitting .257. What I said in the Sal Stewart blurb still stands.
Hunter Dobbins – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 hits, zero walks, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.18. When on the mound, Dobbins is played by Andy Serkis. Many people don’t know that. Other thing people don’t know is Dobbins’s dad was the first man on the moon. Hunter’s dad also invented milk. Dobbins is pitching well right now, but, unless he unlocked something not seen in his five years of minor league numbers, he’s a fairly pedestrian streamer. But guys can unlock stuff, so monocle or Streamonator.
Reid Detmers – 5 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 4.05. Picked him up in my RCL for his last two starts (11 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 13 Ks), and, so far, that’s my first decent move all year in that league. Still early! On a side note, did you hear about how an Angels scout was caught spying this week? He was spying on the Rockies! [binoculars to eyes] “Damn, I can’t make out if they have trade interest in Adam Frazier or Yoan Moncada.” But wait! It gets better! He was also caught spying on the Padres, and the Angels lost two of three games in that series. But hold on! There’s one more delicious treat to this story. The scout who was spying? He was on X. His handle was The Baseball Spy. I kid you not.
