Please see our player page for Peter Lambert to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

Chris Archer (6 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 5.73) allowed four homers to the first five hitters he faced in the 2nd inning.  The only way things could look worse for Chris Archer and, specifically the Pirates, is if Austin Meadows hit all four homers wearing different colored sombreros.  “Hola!  I am Austin Prairieritto!”  “Hola!  I am Tijuana Meadows!”  “Hola!  I am Roberto Hernandez!”  “Hola!  Imagine my exclamation marks are in the front of my sentences but upside down!”  Okay, I’m Daffy like a duck talking about a Spanish Meadows when it was the Braves who mollywhopped Archer.  A Spanish Robert Loggia, “Archer is a pitcher that don’t throw straight.”  As I said yesterday, it’s not whether the record of four straight hitters with a home run is going to fall this year, it’s only how soon and with how many homers total.  8 straight hitters with a homer?  9?  12?  Yesterday, Brian McCann (2-for-4, 4 RBIs) hit his 4th and 5th homer, going Yardo Montalban hitting them where da plane da plane goes.  Josh Donaldson (1-for-4) hit his 9th homer, managing to control his Hulk-smash anger until the appropriate time — at the DMV.  Nick Markakis (1-for-2, 2 runs) hit his 6th homer for his 2nd Sparkakis in two days, and Ozzie Albies (1-for-3, hitting .270) hit his 10th homer, 3rd in two games.  ProContractsAreWhatWeKnow dot com said Albies earned $17.87 between homers.  Albies looks like he’s come out of his May funk, but he still has no place to move up in the lineup.  Well, maybe he can replace Austin Riley, whose average has dropped eighty points in a week.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hello, deep-league friends and acquaintances!  Welcome back to the area of Razzball where each week we dig in every little crevice we can find in hopes of discovering buried fantasy baseball treasure.  In our world we are used to having to be beggars, not choosers, when it comes to looking for free agent and waiver wire help for our fantasy baseball teams… but that just makes it all the more satisfying when we do manage to stumble upon a hidden gem.  For the most part, though, we’re just looking for everyday rocks which which we can plug the holes of our lineups — once again, here are this week’s handful of names who could, in the right circumstance, be useful to those in NL-only, AL-only, and other deep leagues.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s not easy writing a post about a hitter that went bingo-bango on your pitcher three times. Why the hell was Trevor Bauer in the game for 119 pitches?  Did Bauer invite Tito Francona to his house for one of his baseball player meet-and-greets and serve him coconut water? Cause if he did that, then hell hath no fury like someone served coconut water.  “Is this sweet…perspiration?”  That’s me drinking coconut water.  Trevor Bauer (8 IP, 5 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.93) has the Twitter handle BauerOutage and, gotta be honest, it’s meaning something that he’s not intending this season.  It’s like 1977 in New York City power outage and Son of Sam is talking to his dog about what a mess my fantasy pitching is, due to Bauer.  Any hoo!  Max Kepler went to-the-window-to-the-wall three times yesterday (4-for-4, 4 RBIs, hitting .266) with his 13th, 14th, and 15th homer, and is doing what I always dreamt of, only I was dreaming about it in 2017. See, I’m accurate about everything, except years.  Right now, on our Player Rater, Kepler is around the 25th best outfielder.  However, before his home run yesterday, he was hitless for close to a week, so it shows you his hot and cold natural.  Right now, it’s Max Power:

Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Handed down through the generations from Hammurabi to Hammurabi was a code of SAGNOF.  It read, “Yo, Hamm-whaaaaaazzzzzup-be?! Don’t pay for saves, dem shizzes are free on waivers.” It read a bit like a text message, tee bee aitch.  But that was the code as written.  Cut to 14,000 years later, and I received this code in a dream after ingesting a massive amount of peyote.  I would’ve discarded it like the iguana I also received, but there was something to this code, and from that day forward I forbade myself from paying a lot for saves.  Then March came and Craig Kimbrel was falling and I was like, “Ain’t ever gonna get a price like this again!” and drafted him, and not listening to Hamm-whaaaaaazzzzzup-be really effed me.  Thankfully, my long national nightmare is over and Craig Kimbrel signed with the Cubs.  Does this negate all the leagues where I have Pedro Strop?  *Lisa Simpson grumble*  Yes, appizzarently, it does. I’d imagine Kimbrel will need at least two to three weeks of minor league games to get up to snuff, but closers can get stretched quicker than starters, obvi.  I wouldn’t drop Strop until I saw a Kimbrel save, but he’s coming back.  Finally.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We’ve survived the scorching Arizona desert. Now we trek up into the Rocky Mountains to seek out the infamous…er…Rockies. Grab a cold Coors Light and make sure your mountains are blue. Honestly, does anybody let a beer sit around long enough for it to get warm? If so, why do you do that? Drink the damn thing. Speaking of blue, the Rockies are a great team to invest in if you like getting a case of blue balls from your prospects. They’re so sexy and ya just know they’re going to hit in that park. This is gonna be your year! Wait…they’re all still in Triple-A. Aaargh! 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

In the words of Frank Lucas, “Rockies hitters are a brand name; as much a brand name as Pepsi. I own it. I stand behind it. I guarantee it, and people know that even if they don’t know me.” So the story goes for Rockies prospects reports, all the kids want to know about all the potential future Rockie bats, and are quick to raspberry a talented arm before his future Coors date. With this in mind, I try and focus on some of the more unheralded hitting talent amongst the Purple’s ranks. There is loads of infield depth in this system, with a fair share of mid-rotation arms, and some speedy outfielders to boot. It’s not the Rockies farms of the past few offseasons, but it’s a talented group nevertheless. The Rocks have done an excellent job of developing talent, and cashing in at the major league level over the years. The roster currently boasts home grown talents like Nolan Arenado, Charlie Blackmon, Jon Gray, Trevor Story, and DJ LeMahieu among others. So the question remains, who is the next player to emerge a fantasy star? Go ahead and take your best guess, it’s the Rockies Top Prospects for 2018 Fantasy Baseball.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Is there truly any system more worthy of your attention than Colorado’s? That’s not even a commentary on their high end talent or depth, as much as it is a commentary on Coors being awesome for boosting hitter’s value. The problem is due to this Ibiza for hitting reality, the Rockies have focused their efforts on acquiring top amateur pitching talent. So many of these top arms are sentenced to a fate worth than cleaning Billy Butler’s toilet after a Chili Cookoff. Pitching half of your games in the high altitude of Denver. Hey, at least they can smoke away the pain of bad home starts. Am I right? After graduating three strong talents into the majors last season in Jonathan Gray, David Dahl, and Trevor Story, the Rocks have another trio ready to contribute in the big leagues this season in Tom Murphy, Raimel Tapia, and Jeff Hoffman. As always any Rockies hitter has value, and any Rockies pitcher is worth treading lightly on. So read on, and learn who the Top Colorado Rockies Prospects are for 2017.

Please, blog, may I have some more?