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It’s Vidal Brujan SZN! BruSZN?! Tell me oh great Fantasy Baseball Overlord, it is not a dream I have awoken from–“Shut up and grab Vidal Brujan.” That’s the Fantasy Baseball Overlord speaking only to me. Sorry, you ain’t got the cred! The Rays’ beat writers said with Manuel Margot hitting the IL with a hamstring injury, which is truly too bad–DID SOMEONE SAY VIDAL BRUJAN?!–The beat writers also said Brujan wouldn’t just be up for a doubleheader on Wednesday. He would remain with the Rays. So, I grabbed him in one league, and tried in all my leagues, including a 12-team mixed league. Here’s my Vidal Brujan fantasy. Bit old, still applies, which is different than my least favorite fruit, that’s “still apples.” The big takeaway from my fantasy take on Brujan is what Prospect Itch said about him, “It’s rare enough for a 40-steal player to enter our game. Even rarer to find one who hits enough to earn himself regular playing time. Rarer still to find one who speaks five languages. I mention this last piece because language learning requires the same determination needed for the grind of baseball. You’re going to make mistakes. Might look like an idiot. Might often feel dumb. But you have to keep putting yourself out there. And as long as you stay positive and focus on the long term, you can improve a little bit every day. In 2014, Tampa signed Brujan out of the Dominican Republic for $15,000. He was illiterate at the time. Now: five languages. Grey can’t speak one.” Tough but fair, tee bee aitch. Go and grab him! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
PSYCHE! Before we get into today’s roundup, just wanted to announce I’ve released the top 100 for the 2nd half already on our Patreon. If you so desire, click it to put duckets in Grey’s pockets! They said they’d pay me in Dogecoin, that’s good, right? Anyway II, the roundup:
Rowdy Tellez – Traded to the Brewers for middle reliever, Trevor Richards. This is amazingly great news for Tellez in every conceivable way. Will get an everyday job at 1st base. Will be their best hitter, so he’ll be a middle-of-the-order bat, and, because he’s Jewish, he has the automatic nickname of The He’Brewer. There’s no bad here! You might remember (unlikely) that I wrote a Rowdy Tellez sleeper. The general gist there still makes sense. Tellez more Tellez more! Does he light the menorah?! Tellez more Tellez more! Can he be a top 10 1st baseman in the 2nd half? Yes. I even grabbed him in a 12 team mixed league.
Keston Hiura – He will likely move back to 2nd base with the addition of Rowdy, but Hiura could also platoon or get benched or just get traded for a ham sandwich, as he starts to look a mess again. I had Hiura in my top 100 for the 2nd half (barely), but I’ve removed him as I continue to update and come to my senses.
Pablo Lopez – 4 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 2.94. What did I say the other day? Because he only threw one pitch on Friday, he was going to overthrow in his next start. Then he goes out and throws 91 pitches, gets 8 Ks and can’t get through five.
Tony Gonsolin – 5 IP, 0 ER, 2 hits, 1 walk, 3 Ks, ERA at 2.11. His peripherals through 21 1/3 IP are goofy: 10.6 K.9 (nice!), and 5.9 BB/9 (um, dubya tee eff). Those command numbers might just be out of whack, due to sample size, so, yeah, I’m intrigued, y’all!
Andrew McCutchen – 1-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 14th homer, hitting .233. He’s not having a great year. Looks old. Slowing down. It happens, only “it” is spelled with two more letters in front of it, right? Yeah, he also has four more homers than Juan Soto.
Jean Segura – 4-for-6, 4 runs, 2 RBIs, hitting .330. He’s only got 210-ish at-bats on the season, but .330 is nothing to sneeze at unless you’re allergic to productive hitters. And if you are, you should trade for Cody Bellinger.
Rhys Hoskins – 3-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 20th homer. I like to think the Phils ran up the score to try to get a position player in the game for Alec Bohm (0-for-5, 1 run).
Bryce Harper – 5-for-6, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 15th homer, hitting .282. This is like when you’re in Little League, and everyone gets their hits, then the coach throws the ball into the outfield, pretends Alec Bohm got a hit and tells him to run.
Aaron Nola – 6 IP, 4 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 4.53. He sailed out to the Ivictory Coast for a free night at the W, but Nola also got into some trouble and can’t pitch a clean game all of a sudden.
Javier Baez – 2-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 20th and 21st homer, and his 2nd and 3rd in the last two games. Hey, I love it, but maybe I’m Baez.
Spenser Watkins – 5 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 2 Ks in his first major league start. Fun fact! His full name is Spenser Sgifts Watkins. It’s Mallcourtian. Any hoo! These results aside he’s not very good.
Anthony Santander – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 6th homer. Loved Santander coming into the year, but an injury derailed him and yadda3, but there’s a chance he could have a big 2nd half, and do what I thought capable in the preseason.
Cedric Mullins – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 16th homer. This year Cedric the HRtainer has avoided the D.L. hugely, being the Mac, and not just when Harvey pitches.
Vladimir Guerrero Jr. – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 28th homer. Cake Batter pounded that homer like Paula Deen doing a shot of butter.
Randal Grichuk – 2-for-4 , 2 runs and his 16th homer, and his 2nd homer in two games. Grichuk could challenge Adam Duvall to the most random hot streaks that disappear as quick as they come around. Not sure how they would judge that challenge. Bleh, I come up with the ideas, you guys implement.
Lourdes Gurriel Jr. – 3-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer. More like Lourdes Gurriel Hr.! Amiright?!
Framber Valdez – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 2.86. The Regression Fairies love all the dating shows on Netflix, and absolutely never miss an over-producing pitcher.
Yordan Alvarez – 3-for-3, 3 runs, 5 RBIs and his 15th and 16th homer, hitting .308. Holy crizzap, I just realized Yordan only has two more homers than McCutchen. Of course, Yordan’s been better in every other way, but still.
Chris Bassitt – 4 1/3 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 3.41. That matchup in Houston was one of Chris’s I should’ve went right *pinkie to mouth* Pass-it. The puns don’t make the pain go away.
Orlando Arcia – 2-for-3 and his 1st homer, in only his third game with the Braves, as he now mans left field for the most-underperforming team or nah? I think yeah, but maybe you say nah. Doesn’t matter. Arcia was tearing up Triple-A, as he should be since he’s a six-year major league vet. Don’t have a ton of faith in Arcia being suddenly great, but in deeper leagues you could do worse.
John Hicks – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 4th homer, and third homer in two games and 4th homer in four games, and Joey Gallo has decided hitting home runs with his own arms is too easy, so now he’s made John Hicks his marionette.
Adolis Garcia – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 21st homer, hitting .276. Adolis amigo!
Dane Dunning – 5 IP, 1 ER, 2 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 4.22. Really liked Dunning coming into this year, but it didn’t work out. With that said (Grey coming through with a reversal!), Dunning’s not nearly as bad at 4.22 ERA as I thought. Streamonator doesn’t have him down for another start, but watch for the 2nd half.
Jake Rogers – 2-for-4 and his 5th homer. Hey, Joey Gallo, stop puppeteering catchers! In all seriousness, Hicks or Rogers are fine if they’re hot, which they seem.
Eric Haase – 1-for-2, 3 RBIs and his 12th homer. Okay, as hot as Rogers or Hicks might be, Haase haas been smoking for his last 100 at-bats.
Robbie Grossman – 1-for-3 and his 11th homer. It truly makes me laugh that the Tigers went with Grossman at leadoff for nearly the whole season, now they’re putting him as the three-hole hitter. Like he got better!
Michael A. Taylor – 1-for-4, 2 runs and his 8th homer. Ya wanna blow your mind? His real name is Michael Anthony Taylor. He could be going by Michael An. Taylor this whole time, while selling women’s pantsuits. But no!
Andrew Benintendi – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer, hitting .278. Did you hear An. Taylor and Benintendi are joining forces to cover women’s business and casual? Business in the front, Benintendi in the back.
Luis Castillo – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.81. Glad he’s no longer giving up 450-foot homers to guys like Nicky Lopez, but how about some more Ks? Thanks, homey!
Brad Brach – 1/3 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 3.10 as he started the implosion, and Heath Hembree (1/3 IP, 1 ER, ERA at 5.33) blew the game. Thinking I need to stop chasing Reds closers. The Reds’ bullpen looks at the Philly pen and thinks, “Man, if only we had some of those guys.”
Wil Myers – 2-for-3, 5 RBIs and his 10th homer, hitting .252. What a terrible season Myers is having, which is what I say to set you up for the next blurb.
Juan Soto – 2-for-4 and his 10th homer. Juan Soto is now tied with Wil Myers for the home run lead in Two Guys, One Miserable Season, and Soto has only four more RBIs than Myers on the season. Guess I should be happy Juan Soto’s figured out how to hit home runs by hitting the ball straight down, and caroming it off the plate.
Giancarlo Stanton – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 15th homer. My sweet, sweet Ginacarlo, which is what I call my Giancarlo fathead that I’ve put a hula skirt onto.
Rougned Odor – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer. Some Seattle fans in attendance said that was the strongest Odor they’ve seen since the days of grunge.
Luke Voit – 5-for-6, 1 run, 3 RBIs and 1 Buy Low Window closing.
Jameson Taillon – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 9 Ks, ERA at 5.05. Taillon was a slight positive for this start on the Streamonator, and, unsurprisingly, it hates his next.
Nolan Arenado – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (17) and legs (1). The blinking light on my car’s dashboard must have an obvious explanation. So, let me check out this user’s manual, right after I place it haphazardly by this open window–NOOO!!! Torenado!!!
Brandon Crawford – 4-for-5, 3 RBIs. Wanna cry? Of course you do! On the Player Rater, Brandon Crawford’s been better than Freddie Freeman and about the same as Brandon Woodruff.
Yasmani Grandal – Will miss upwards to six weeks with a torn tendon in his knee. Someone plant Zack Collins (2-for-3, 1 run, 2 RBIs) or the Mercedes behind home plate and vroom vroom goes the value.
Carlos Rodon – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 2.31. Rodon has become a top five, at worse, top ten ace.
Jose Berrios – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 3.36. And, continuing my thoughts from Rodon, Berrios always seems to be a top 25-30 starter. No matter what.
Nathan Eovaldi – 5 2/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 3.66. I’m pretty sure I’ve sat Eovaldi for all his good starts, and started him for all his bad ones, so I have an ERA north of 5 from Eovaldi on my teams.
Anthony Rendon – Hit the IL with a hamstring strain. Ya know what’s going on here right? You know right? Anthony Rendon is making sure the last of his believers abandons him, so he’s drafted around 250th overall next year, and has a huge bounce back in 2022. You know this, right?
Max Stassi – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 6th homer. Thought it was the year of the ox, but I’m finding out it’s the year of the random catcher.
Shohei Ohtani – 7 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.49, and 1-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI. The Angels replaced Mike Trout with another best hitter in baseball who can also be a top 20 starter, all without moving out of 4th place in their division. That’s commitment to a bit.
Stuart Fairchild – 0-for-0, 1 run. Was called up by the Diamondbacks for his MLB debut. If you can say Fairchild without sounding like Dixie Carter, you’re a better person than me (or worse, jury’s still out). Prospect Itch said of Fairchild, “Though he may not be an elite in any one area, Fairchild is a balanced prospect with average or better tools across the board. He’s good enough with the glove to stay in center and has demonstrated an ability to draw his walks while limiting his strikeouts. His 10.6/12.8 K/BB percentage in AA as a 23-year-old is surely among the reasons Diamondback brass targeted him in the Archie Bradley trade, and I’d love to put a target on Grey’s back.” What? Cmon! Not sure how the Dbacks are going to use Fairchild, but they should leave “playing Reddick” to Vin Diesel.
