Please see our player page for Rowdy Tellez to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

For a long time in his career, Jose Quintana seemed to be underrated in some fantasy circles and, if those people didn’t recognize Quintana’s genius, I’d call them jerks, so they were circle jerks. Early in his career, even his radar blips would end up being a tugboat filled with pandas rather a real scare. Then, later in his career, we boarded the tugboat and they were feral pandas. “Ling-Ling thinks my arm is bamboo!” Jose Quintana was no longer safe like the circle jerk Quintana, but became more of the feral panda Quintana. Recently, however, Quintana’s been a good blip again and the feral pandas are satiated with boba, greeting us with Panda Express menus. Yesterday, he went 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 14 Ks, ERA at 4.11, and in three August starts:  1.89 ERA, 26 Ks and only one walk. He looks fixed, and I’m willing to give him more rope, but if I see one more gee-dee feral panda, all bets are off. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Seeing Zac Gallen called up and I’m reminded of me doing karaoke.  Picture, if you will, the song Tequila playing and me just holding a mic, dancing.  Now imagine I’m surrounded by multiple Mickey Rourkes feeding strawberries to multiple Kim Basingers, because this scene is filled with eroticism like you’ve never witnessed before.  It’s taboo filled with self-sacrifice, transgression is in the air while being dominated by a song with only one word.  I’m alive for the first time!  Now, watch Gallen get trounced by the sissy AF Cardinals.  Okay, I’ve been telling you to pick up Gallen for about a month.  On our Prospectonator, he’s the 4th best rookie pitcher, which translates to him possibly being the rookie pitcher of the year.  Think Chris Paddack.  Fo’realsies.  Prospect Mike just gave you his Zac Gallen fantasy, and I’d just go there and read that to find out what kind of pitcher he is, because that’s what I did.  He had lefties hitting .127 off him?  I mean, are you kidding? Seriously, is this a joke?  Do you want me to faint while I am entertaining a room full of drunk people with Tequila?  Do you?!  I didn’t think so. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If you’re looking to save some cash to use elsewhere and like to be bold, turn your attention to Rowdy Tellez (1B: $2,300). He doesn’t hit the ball often, but when he does it goes a long way. To wit, he has only 42 hits in 185 ABs on the season but 10 of them have left the yard. Boom goes the dynamite. Most importantly, he just looks like a slugger, which is to say…thicc. The price is right so take a gamble. You either bet big or you go home, you gotta risk it to get the biscuit.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Padres sent Chris Paddack down to Single-A to limit his innings. When Nick Margevicius heard the news, he said, “Damn, guess I’ll be limited too.” Padres, “Nah, you good, throw 270 IP if you can.”  Paddack being sent down to the minors feels like an encapsulation of all that’s wrong with baseball.  Or at least that element.  That whole manipulation of young players element.  Paddack won’t pitch in Single-A.  He’s going for a rest.  A vacay, of sorts.  A little ‘how’s your father’ in Lake Elisnore at the House of Alfredo Griffindoor. He has to be back in 20 days (due to service time), and he will be. My guess is in two weeks.  Why any team thinks it’s better to shut down a guy early and start them up again vs. shut them down in August is beyond me. Member how well that helped Julio Urias? He needed surgery to correct things. To put it in laymen’s terms, shut down your car in the dead of winter and restart it or leave it running while you run into CVS?  Okay, maybe the Consumer Value Store scenario depends on some of your janky neighborhoods, but you catch the drift.  Either way, I’m trying to hold Paddack in most leagues; he’ll likely only miss three starts.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So Didi was activated and played on Friday, and FanDuel surprised the heck out of me by preemptively raising his price to $3,000. The only conclusion I can draw from this is that random price setting guy at FanDuel reads my articles. So thank you, random FanDuel Price Setting Guy for doing the dirty work and making Didi Gregorius $3,000 instead of $2,000, you truly are a Real American Hero (cue the music from those Bud Light ads about Real American Heros / Real Men of Genius). I got nothing else for an introduction today, but the next time I need FanDuel to do something, I shall make sure to include it in the article.

On to the picks…

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Orioles are on pace to give up 1,776 home runs, because they’re close to our nation’s capital, and that is a great figure, a historic number.  A cannot be imitated — help me out here, Captain Lou Albano — never duplicated number.  Scratch that, they’re now on pace to give up 1777 home runs because of the Battle of the Assunpink Creek. That was also the title of the Pink concert when her stretch pants were a little too skimpy in the back.  “I see your Assupink Creek 2017.”  Great show, the aerobatics alone.  So, I try to avoid making every lede about hitters in Coors or facing the Orioles, but here goes, because Gleyber Torres has 14 homers against the O’s in five games and 12 homers on the year.  There’s math involved in that number.  He went 2-for-5 with his 11th and 12th homers.  Next up, literally, Brett Gardner (3-for-4, 1 run) hit more doubles than the sketchy guy at the craps table who kept betting the horn and looking over his shoulder.  DJ LeMahieu (2-for-4, 2 RBIs, HR) was on the ones and twos, but mostly on the ones, since he hit leadoff and his 4th homer.  Gary Sanchez (2-for-4) hit his 15th long ball and don’t mention hitting balls around Gary, he crosses his legs.  Then there’s Thairo (2-for-4, 2 RBIs, HR), who should be on the Iron Throne, but that’s a hot internet take, and I’m here for cold ones, but he even has three homers because Our Commissioner Manfred sticks Capri Sun straws into balls and juices them up.  If you learn nothing else from this post, and you might not, stream all hitters vs. the Orioles.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m like Neo dodging bullets, only instead of bullets, it’s bad pitchers.  Bends in slo-mo and avoids Ed-Rod, twists to the right and avoids Trevor Bauer, twists left and sees Jalen Beeks…Well, I’d never own him, so…Then again, he has been pretty good as the Malcolm for the Rays.  Ya know, their Middle man.  Oh, crap, I’ve been shot!  *dies in slo-mo*  Beeeeeeeeeeks!  *clutches chest, searches for bullet wound, can’t find it* I thought I was shot.  Oh, noooooooo!!!  It’s worse than I thought!  It was my fantasy team that was shot!  You could’ve avoided this whole megillah for the last, oh, I don’t know, 12 years, minus two random years in the middle (not Malcolm) if you just owned Justin Verlander.  Yesterday, he took a no-hitter into the 7th inning, and went 8 IP, 1 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 12 Ks, ERA at 2.24, and on our Player Rater, he is the number one starter.  Barely as good as Tim Anderson, but, ya know, those are noogs for another day.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Scott Schebler looks about as DFA-able as I’ve seen anyone look in some time.  DFA stands for Da F**k Attahere.  Even if he’s not, Nick Senzel was promoted and is hitting 2nd tonight.  So, what are we banking on, or simply FDIC?  That’s not regarding fiduciary concerns, that’s F**k Do I Care?  Or more accurately, why am abbreviating everything a NYC cabbie says? Senzel has speed/power and could hit .315+.  He is one of the best pure hitters in the minors.  It’s the Senzel SZN!  SZN stands for Senzel, which means I just said, “It’s the Senzel Senzel!”  Not only is Senzel owned in all of my leagues, but guys like Rudy have owned him all year, stashing him on their bench.  I point to Rudy specifically, because he’s fairly agnostic on rookies, in general, so you know there’s something here.  Things break right and Senzel could be the number one call-up this year.  Yes, I avoided all the talk about his injuries, except for this throwaway comment, but we’re talking about the positives.  It’s Friday, LMFAO!  That’s Leave Me F**K Alone, Octopus.  I’m floating in a giant aquarium as I write this.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Royals swept the Rays yesterday in a doubleheader, taking down Blake Snell (3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 4.31).  Snell can’t handle the Royals, they can Snell what he’s cooking.  As Razzball commenter, tigersharkz said, “Yep, Snell’s fine. Recovering from a broken toe in 10 days happens all the time in real life.” From Young MC’s Bust A Move, “Blake is getting shot down because he’s over-Snellous. …so hey, Reigning Cy, don’t bust a toe.”  No foolsies, but pitchers need their toes to push off, and anything can get them out of whack.  I’m officially concerned.  Of course, the Royals were led by Adalberto Mondesi (3-for-7, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and a slam (4) and double legs (9, 10) on opposite sides of a doubleheader, hitting .295).  Adalberto is my daddy — excuse me, Addadytogrey Mondesi. He’s now on pace for 20/50/.290. Yeah, terrible 2nd round pick. Also, chipping in for the Royals was Kelvin Gutierrez (2-for-7, 4 RBIs and his 1st homer). How big is this guy? Have you seen him? He’s like $54 T-bone vending machine steak. (Gonna keep using this until it catches on.) Is he related to The Big FraGu (throwback)?  KelGu, take me away.  He looks like he should be able to hit 20 homers and steal 10+ bags, but I don’t know if he’ll have the playing time, so best for deeper leagues for now. Terrance Gore keeps hitting (1-for-4, 1 run, hitting .400).  I’d like to see Terrance Gore on the Big floor piano. It would be like Jerry Lee Lewis on coke. …Whole Lotta Stealin’ Going On!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

*blows dust off cover to the book, “Raimel Tapia, Fantasy Sleeper”* Just found this book on a shelf in this Colorado-area bookstore.  “I think this is yours.”  The bookstore owner holds up a copy of, “Josh Rutledge’s Fantasy Sleeper.”  Haha, no, that’s not mine.  “It says “Property of Grey Albright.”  Can I just read from one of your other books in peace without paying for it?  No wonder bookstores are all going out of business, you don’t leave your customers alone!  Any hoo, as I was saying about Raimel Tapia, he was a 2015 Pick-to-Click, a 2016 Gotz-to-Getz-Him, a 2017 This-is-the-Year and a 2018 Absolute-Must-Own for a reason.  He has 15-homer power and 25-steal speed who shouldn’t hurt you in average (think .270).  The problem for so long has been the Rockies’ inability to kowtow to fantasy owners and play the sexy guys.  Not unrelated, Garrett Hampson is due for everyday playing time in 2023.  However, something interesting has happened recently — interesting is subjective but if you’re reading this I assume it applies — Ian Desmond has been getting benched regularly.  Finally!  If Tapia gets 5+ starts a week, he is a Pick-to-Click-Gotz-to-Getz-Him-This-is-the-Year-Absolute-Must-Own in all leagues.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?