Is it possible I will have drafted a shortstop in the 1st round, a shortstop in the 2nd round for my MI spot and a shortstop in the 3rd round for my utility spot? Prolly not, but I don’t want to rule out anything with how great the shortstops look. During last preseason, Rudy told me I was too high on multiple shortstops. He never apologized, but that’s okay, I forgive him. As Napoleon said, “I forgive you for only putting two layers in my whipped cream dessert, but if you meant it as a dig on my height, I will never forget.” So, here’s Steamer’s 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. All my 2019 fantasy baseball rankings are under that thingie-ma-whosie, and I mention where all tiers start and stop, and all shortstop projections are mine. Let’s get to it! Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2019 fantasy baseball:
8. Xander Bogaerts – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Peraza. I call this tier, “Have you seen where I put my eyes?” By the tier name I mean, the shortstops are so stacked that my eyes bulged out of my head, fell somewhere nearby, but, as you can imagine, it’s hard to locate eyes when you need eyes to locate them. As for Bogaerts, the shortstop position continues to impress. To misquote Tenacious D, “It was the best position in the world, it was the best the position in the world!” Yo, 1st basemen, this is how you do a position! I’ve mentioned this before, but I really think there’s something to kids growing up with their idols playing certain positions. All of these young shortstops likely were watching A-Rod tear up shortstop, and decided to play the same position. As fo’really about Bogaerts, he’s entering his prime and on the cusp of a 25/10/.290 season, and that’s only barely boosting him from his last year 23/8/.288 season. To randomly pick on another guy, Carlos Correa never had one season that good. 2019 Projections: 89/25/105/.291/10 in 534 ABs
9. Jean Segura – Here’s what I said this offseason about Segura, “Traded to the Phils. JAWN Segura, as Phillies fans will undoubtedly pronounced it, fixes the top of the Phils’ order, and gets Just Peachy Crawford the hell out of town. Throw a Gritty doll at him on the way to the plane! I could see Segura regaining top form in Philly, and being a 20/30 powerhouse once again. I kinda love Segura in Philly.” And that’s me quoting me! Guys and five girl readers, shortstops are so sexy. 2019 Projections: 92/17/71/.308/25 in 577 ABs
10. Jose Peraza – For so many years I told you about how I liked Peraza because of his ability to hit 10 homers and steal 30+ bases with a good average. Last year, he went 14/23/.288, which I think people are confusing with his peak. Well, don’t want to call you homophonic, but that’s just a peek. 2019 Projections: 92/15/55/.292/31 in 612 ABs
11. Carlos Correa – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Seager. I call this tier, “You sneeze and I say, ‘Got flesh poo.'” I call this tier that because I’d say, “God bless you,” but you don’t deserve my blessings because you went against my blessings and drafted these guys. Could Correa, for unstints, bounce back? I guess, but my ulcer and I have an agreement and it includes me not putting it through unnecessary stress. If I want to risk a later pick on a bounce back, then great! Super! Excitement! I’ll be drafting a different position when these guys are going off draft boards. As for Correa, maybe I’ll see you again in 2020. 2019 Projections: 80/26/91/.277/3 in 566 ABs
12. Corey Seager – Was not a fan of Seager for the two years when he was healthy, how ya think I’m gonna feel about him coming off two surgeries? Tommy John surgery was enough to be wary, but arthroscopic hip surgery? Did he get a throw-in on a two-for-one offer? 2019 Projections: 84/24/76/.288/3 in 531 ABs
13. Tim Anderson – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Escobar. I call this tier, “Making ‘Man on the Moon’ lyrics work.” I’m by no means a big R.E.M. fan, but how they were able to make that song work is just ridiculous. Putting ‘Now, Andy, did you hear about this one?’ in a chorus? Are you serious? And it works? C’mon! ‘Andy, are you goofing on Elvis?’ It’s just insane making those lyrics work. It’s genius. What is also genius is drafting guys in this tier and having them work. Every single guy in this tier is going to have at least half your league thinking they won’t work, and some of these guys have already worked, and they still get no respect. Also, I will say as stacked as the shortstop position is early on, there is a huge dropoff around Andrus. It’s gonna look something like this in my top 500 overall: 12-14 shortstops in the top 100 overall, then 6-7 in the next 100, then raspberries lips. So much talk of this position being stacked as me thinking about that short-lived sitcom, Stacked with Pamela Anderson. You know how you’re getting old? Or at least how I know I’m getting old. I can’t remember if I worked on the Pamela Anderson sitcom, Stacked, if I went to see a live taping of it or if I know someone who worked on it. I know I worked on some show with Pamela Anderson. It was uncredited, so don’t bother looking. I know I worked with Pamela Anderson at one point. She is super tiny–Okay, this is becoming a shaggy dog story. As for Tim Anderson, I called him in a sleeper last year, and he did exactly what I expected of him, and don’t see any reasons why he can’t repeat. 2019 Projections: 72/21/84/.248/24 in 577 ABs
15. Eduardo Escobar – I flip-flopped Villar and Escobar a few times, finally landing on this because Villar’s upside is just higher than Escobar’s. Also, the Diamondbacks sent out a bunch of lifeboats to get rid of some of the higher-priced guys on their team, and now what’s left is…deathboats? Okay, so a bunch of the guys in this tier could be considered deathboats since they’re on dying teams, but Escobar will be the D-Backs’ three-hole hitter, and that’s valuable, even on a bad team. 2019 Projections: 81/25/90/.270/5 in 589 ABs
16. Gleyber Torres – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Tatis. I call this tier, “Failure of effort.” By the tier name, I mean I tried to get both of these guys in tiers above and below and I just wasn’t able to, which is on me, but a ‘failure of effort’ feels harsh, but if that’s what you think of me, fine. Jerk. As for Torres, went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball..
18. Fernando Tatis Jr. – Already gave you my Fernando Tatis Jr. fantasy. It was written while screaming, “FTJ! Fun the Jewels fast! Fun the Jewels fast! Fun the Jewels fast!” 2019 Projections: 14/3/11/.252/3 in 75 ABs
19. Amed Rosario – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until DeJong. I call this tier, “Right before egg noodles and ketchup.” By the tier name I mean, this is the last reprieve before you’re in Witness Protection, you snitch bastage. After this tier, it’s no man’s land. As for Amed, he’s a potential 15/25/.275 guy, and Amed to that! But I also worry he was caught stealing a lot and might only steal 15-ish bags, which is why he wasn’t ranked even higher. 2019 Projections: 71/16/48/.268/22 in 595 ABs
20. Marcus Semien – His stats remind me of Yadier Molina. There’s no rhyme or reason. If you were to plot out Semien’s stats, dots would be all over the place. He’s a master painter using the no-pointillism techinique. Some years Semien hits for power, some speed another year, never really any average, but some years just an awful average. It’s like Semien keeps squirming around and feels icky on a hotel bed sheet. Wait, what? 2019 Projections: 68/20/80/.246/12 in 551 ABs
22. Paul DeJong – I called Colonel Mustard aka DeJong a sleeper last year, and he hit 19 HRs in 115 games, so he would’ve got to my preseason projections last year if he stayed healthy, and I still like him a lot as a possible breakout. To misquote Ice Cube from Burn Hollywood Burn, “Yeah, I’ll check out Hot Dog: The Movie, but it’ll take some DeJong to move me.” 2019 Projections: 78/27/87/.250/2 in 566 ABs
23. Elvis Andrus – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Gordon. I call this tier, “My dog is going to love this!” When you get a gift you don’t like, a polite way to say it’s garbage is the tier name. This tier is guys that I think are garbage, but I’m being polite! As for Andrus, you’re drafting a 30-year-old who provided fantasy value through steals who just stole five bases in eight attempts. El oh–you’re dumb. 2019 Projections: 81/8/61/.261/15 in 577 ABs
25. Joey Wendle – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Goodrum. I call this tier, “See another post.” This tier is pretty self-explanatory. I think you have, uh, see another post to know what I think on them. As for Wendle, went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.
29. Asdrubal Cabrera – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Ahmed. I call this tier, “Every team has to start a shortstop, which will only get worse when MLB bans the shift.” This tier is filled with starters, so at-bats and…Well, at-bats are the first step to fantasy value, right? I’m being so positive! Hey, listen, you with the hairline that’s creeping up your melon, we’re deep at this point, so you want a starter or not? Wow, I’m sassy! As for Asdrubal, went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.
31. Andrelton Simmons – One thing this guy really excels in is plate appearances. Have you ever seen his plate appearances? They’re more abundant than Joey Chestnut. By the way, Marcus Semien books hotel rooms under the name Joey Chestnut. Little bit of trivia for you! Speaking of Semien, Simmons is also from the school of no-pointillism. His stats charted out are like a grade school watercolor drawing that is having water drizzled on it. A real smear! 2019 Projections: 71/13/67/.287/12 in 570 ABs
32. Tim Beckham – Here’s what I said this offseason, “(Beckham) signed with the Mariners. ‘I’m just getting settled in, but everyone has been so nice to me. They keep moving my bags to my car, even if I tell them they don’t need to.’ That’s J.P. Crawford who was the Mariners’ shortstop for approx. 56 days while failing to secure one start. Mariners are rebuilding while actually making their team better and ruining narratives. Their lineup might actually be better this year than it was last year.” And that’s me quoting me! 2019 Projections: 58/17/64/.247/3 in 489 ABs
33. Didi Gregorius – Truth bomb alert! Didi could be ranked anywhere from 22nd overall to 40th overall depending on number of DL slots and depth of league. I don’t completely hate the flyer on Gregorius if you can stash him for a couple of months while he rehabs, but if I had a nickel for every time a guy was supposed to return ‘before the All-Star break’ to not return that season, I’d have like 35 cents. Not a lot, but it’s increments of nickels, so a decent amount. By the way, Didi vs. Addison Russell, and their ranking when they might each miss similar amounts of time, though for different reasons, I’m assuming you can DL Didi, so he doesn’t take up a roster spot. 2019 Projections: 36/13/42/.277/5 in 289 ABs
35. Orlando Arcia – There’s a chance here for a breakout, but he’d be a great poker player, because he’s in no way tipping his hand. 2019 Projections: 56/12/64/.244/15 in 502 ABs
36. Jorge Polanco – Let’s see, two years ago he went 13/13. Last year in half a year, he went 6/7. Dude’s a 13/13 machine. I will call him Jorge Voorhees. Jason Jorgees? Meh, I’ll work on it! 2019 Projections: 78/13/39/.262/13 in 561 ABs
41. Brandon Crawford – Pretty incredible the career he’s had. I’d say being as mediocre as him while accruing 1,104 games and 4,158 at-bats is as unlikely as a Hall of Fame career. By the way, if you put Crawford’s career together with a Hall of Fame career, you get Harold Baines. 2019 Projections: 65/15/70/.255/4 in 542 ABs
42. Nick Ahmed – Let’s hope he has a great 1st half so him and Amed Rosario both make the All-Star Game, so Joe Buck says, “Ahmed to Amed, Amed to Ahmed, Ahmed to Amed,” then short circuits and is never heard from again. 2019 Projections: 64/13/68/.243/5 in 542 ABs
43. Lourdes Gurriel – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Bichette. I call this tier, “Charlie Brown’s teacher rant.” Some of you might hear wawawawawawa, but it’s such garbage that you have guys like Ketel Marte headed for 575 ABs, and guys who are ready to play will be lucky to get 200 ABs. Sure, two of these guys are Rockies, and don’t have obvious places to play, but BLEH! The Rockies are the biggest culprits of never playing rookies. I don’t mind the shift or that there’s a DH in only one league, the biggest problem with MLB is they don’t fix the blatant manipulation of rookie eligibility. Can you imagine LeBron or Kobe coming out of high school, and languishing for years in an instructional league? Sure, they’re generational talents, but what’s Vlad? Any hoo! Guys in this tier deserve more at-bats. As for Lourdes, went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.
45. Johan Camargo – Sadly, before the Braves went out and got Josh Donaldson, I wrote up a Johan Camargo sleeper post. Sadly for me at least since I wrote it for seemingly no reason. Oh well, I’ll put it with my 1995 Brady Anderson sleeper post that I wrote about how he was about to hit 50 homers, even though he had never hit more than 20 before that. Should’ve posted it! 2019 Projections: 35/10/40/.277/1 in 264 ABs
47. Aledmys Diaz – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Russell. I call this tier, “Love is complicated.” By the tier name I mean, is it better to have loved and lost or to never have loved at all? All of these guys could be asking this question. Or more aptly on point, is it better to never get at-bats and be known as having great promise, or is better to get at-bats and show you don’t have that promise? I’ve expressed love for all of these guys at one point, but now they’re either jobless or should be. As for Aledmys, he’s like the middle infield version of C.J. Cron. He hits when he plays, but no one wants to play him. In Houston, he seems like a lock for under 300 at-bats. 2019 Projections: 21/8/34/.276/2 in 212 ABs
49. Dansby Swanson – It’s criminal if the Braves give Swanson 550 at-bats and Johan under 200, which is to say they’ll both likely end up with around 300 at-bats and both be fairly useless in most leagues. By the way, there’s guys with better projections below guys with worse projections because I’d prefer the guy above him, even if he’s projected for less at-bats. For instance, is it better to watch a 24-hour marathon of Nicholas Cage movies or just 15 minutes of his best scenes from all his movies? “I want to take his face…off.” *head tilt, eyes slowly open, crazed* 2019 Projections: 38/9/46/.248/7 in 324 ABs
50. Scott Kingery – This guy is the epitome of, “Is it better to have loved and lost or to never have loved at all?” He got 450+ at-bats last year and replicated the line of the Padres prospect, Nadir Bupkis. 2019 Projections: 24/5/20/.233/9 in 262 ABs
51. J.P. Crawford – Here’s what I said when he was traded, “Headed to the Mariners. By the way, odds for next year’s World Series are gonna be five teams at 2 to 1, and 25 teams at 500 to 1.” And that’s me quoting me! 2019 Projections: 49/10/55/.217/8 in 479 ABs
52. J.T. Riddle – If Realmuto is traded, Riddle will have to carry the Jerry Tomato title for the Marlins. There’s only one way to know if he can: Look at his stats. *looks at his stats* Nope, he can’t. 2019 Projections: 46/11/52/.237/3 in 454 ABs
53. Addison Russell – Love is so complicated for Addison, he was suspended 40 games to start the season for being a piece of garbage, which wouldn’t preclude me from drafting him in fantasy if he wasn’t also a piece of garbage for fantasy too. By the way, because I won’t get an opportunity to talk about this for Yadiel Rivera, since he didn’t make the rankings. I look at about 100 different eligible hitters for each position, then whittle down the players I don’t think are worth mentioning. Well, I looked at Yadiel Rivera, and, I just have to tell you this. Last year, Yadiel Rivera played in 111 games. Please guess his stat line. PLEASE! Yo, this made me guffaw for like four hours straight. His stat line in 111 games was: 13/1/9/.173/2. Drop a skull emoji because I am literally dead. 2019 Projections: 36/10/39/.244/3 in 334 ABs
54. Yairo Munoz – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until the end of the list. I call this tier, “Sad emoji toast.” I don’t know for a fact that there’s bread in Japan that when you toast it, emojis appear on it, but I’m gonna guess there is. Well, this tier is the sad emoji toast. One other big picture thing that I never realized until this year. For years now I’ve been ranking a random number of guys at each position. It just felt right, there wasn’t much thought to whether I had 50 guys at shortstop and 75 guys at 3rd base. I ranked those that should be ranked. Now that I think about it, if some ‘pert ranks exactly, say, 50 guys at each position, then I’m suspicious. Or if they do 50 for every position, but 100 for SPs and OFs. Still suspicious. How can there be exactly the same number of guys at every position? Some positions just have more guys to rank. You don’t rank ten more 2nd basemen who should be ranked just because you said you were ranking only 50? That doesn’t compute fully for me. As for Munoz, went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball.
55. Troy Tulowitzki – Here’s what I said this offseason, “(Tulo) signed with the Yankees. He told the media, “I’m extremely happy to be joining–” and it appeared that he strained his quad between “happy” and “to.” No word on how long he’ll be out. Honestly, it’s just a bridge loan until Didi returns from Tommy John, the surgery, not the underwear or person.” And that’s me quoting me! This quote from Barlett’s Familiar Quotations was made prior to the signing of DJ LeMahieu, but Tulo should still see some at-bats if he’s healthy. I laughed hysterically when I wrote if. 2019 Projections: 28/9/28/.258 in 228 ABs
56. Jordy Mercer – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Signed with the Tigers. He will be replacing Iglesias at shortstop. Big shoes to fill. Or rather, big pews.” And that’s me quoting me! 2019 Projections: 46/7/51/.241/3 in 464 ABs