Mets To Call Up A Pitching Prospect Or A McDonalds Low-Fat Burger

Nolan McLean will be called up on Saturday. An MLB GM looks at a calendar. There, Saturday is circled. MLB GM, “It just happens that this Saturday (player’s name) is ready. I know! What a crazy coincidence as it’s also the day when it’s in our best interest to call up a prospect.” MLB GMs are given a book of reasons why a prospect is ready at exactly the right time for service time manipulation. The number one reason is, “Needs to work on defense.” If a GM says this excuse about a prospect who will be called up to DH, it could backfire, so they usually add, “In case we need flexibility.” Number two excuse is, “(Player) is close, but we want to make sure he’s ready for the final step in his journey.” It’s an excuse that means nothing, which makes it great. There’s no number three excuse. Any hoo! McLean was in Itch’s last Stash List, there he said, “Has adjusted beautifully to Triple-A, posting a 1.04 WHIP and 2.89 ERA over his last eight starts with 62 strikeouts in 56 innings. Perhaps the command isn’t quite perfect, but McLean’s stuff is major league ready, and Frankie Montas does not look good right now. It’s a little confusing to me that they’re so committed to him during a tight NL East pennant race. He’s got a player option for next year at $17 million, so maybe there’s some sunk cost fallacy in play, but that doesn’t make a ton of sense either given the way this organization operates. They could at least send him to the bullpen for a while. I’d like to send Grey into a pen with a bull.” What? So, Itch nailed all of that. Montas was sent to the pen, and here comes McLean (at the most appropriate time for the Mets). Grab him for upside as long as he’s in the rotation or until the Mets say, “He looks excellent, but that defense could use work.” As for the McDonald’s low fat burger possibility on McLean, he has to be better than 80’s Mets prospect, Trevor McDLT. That guy only threw fastballs and eephus pitches. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

David Peterson – 3 1/3 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 3.30. “Three scoreless innings from David Peterson, like a boss!” At that point, I went to dinner, then I returned and vomited.

Juan Soto – 1-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 29th homer. Sexy Dr. Pepper gonna get to 35 homers at season’s end it never felt like he was hot all year, outside of a June Soto.

Michael Harris II – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 13th homer, a grand slam that capped off a nine-run inning.  That Megahertz the Mets.

Marcell Ozuna – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 20th homer, and seven homers in the 2nd half. Ha, someone heard from their agent at the break about how he needed to hit for what could be his final contract.

Owen Caissie – Cubs are calling up their top prospect and a key piece in the Yu Darvish trade in 2020. Guess that proved my whole thing wrong about teams waiting until Saturday for service time manipulation, huh? Wait, the Cubs played in Japan this year in March and are two games ahead of everyone, aren’t they? Oh, that’s right. In Triple-A, Caissie was hitting .292 with 22 homers, .966 OPS and three steals with a 28 K% and 13.3 BB%. And he’s 22. When I said he was the Cubs’ top prospect, did I leave out the Cubs’ farm system isn’t that great? I might’ve. The Mighty Caissie has power at the bat, and looks like he might hit .220. He seems to have situational stealing ability, so maybe 7/3/.220 for the final six weeks? I don’t mind the flyer for power in any league, but there’s some issues here.

Miguel Amaya – Returned from the 60-day IL, then, after awkwardly stepping on 1st, he was carted off the field with a sprained ankle. Brutal. Dude’s seen more prayer hand emojis than at-bats this year.

Michael Busch – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 23rd homer. PCA is in such a funk, he saw Busch’s homer and asked, “Is that allowed?”

Cade Horton – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 1 hit, 2 walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.07. His 28 1/3 IP of scoreless pitching came to the end along with a five-inning no-hitter. What a loser! As I’ve said numerous times, Horton is not this good, but you roster guys when they’re going this good. That’s just good fantasy baseballing.

Matt Shaw – 1-for-3, 2 runs and a slam (10) and legs (15), 4th homer since last Tuesday, third homer in four games. Don’t suck your teeth and pShaw that!

Kevin Gausman – 7 IP, 2 ER, 4 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.79. Gausman’s had two great months (May 2.81 ERA, July 2.51 ERA) and two awful months (April 4.82, June 5.46) and I don’t know what to gleam from that. August looks decent, if that helps.

Oneil Cruz – Placed on the 7-day concussion IL. That doesn’t mean he needs to watch the Will Smith-starrer Concussion for seven days. A common misconception.

Bryan Reynolds – 3-for-4, 5 RBIs and his 12th and 13th homer. True takeaway here is one of those homers was allowed by Shelby Miller, who must clearly still be injured to allow a homer to this schmohawk.

Mitch Keller – 4 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 4.13. You don’t come for the Brew Crew and not get curbstomped. Relieving Keller wasn’t much better:

Stick to your 11 herbs and spices little bro

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— Razzball (@razzball.bsky.social) August 13, 2025 at 1:51 PM

Brandon Woodruff – 4 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 2.06, and out at 65 pitches. I spent more time than I care to mention (75 seconds) to try to find out if he was injured. It’s very cool now how you try to search “(player name) injury” and you just get thousands of men wishing death on a player, mad that they missed their prop bet. Very normal society. Things are great!

Sal Frelick – 2-for-3, 4 runs, 2 RBIs and his 18th steal, hitting .296, as he continues to hit leadoff for the best team in baseball. When the Brewers closed out their 12th straight win, I, a well-known bandwagoner, officially became their biggest fan. Let’s go Brew Crew! A team that first captured my love further back than I can remember!

Seth Lugo – 4 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 3.77. He will be a 3.40 to 3.60 ERA pitcher every year until the sun engulfs the earth and we all become sun zombies. This is merely regression. It is concerning though, since it’s two straight stinkers — maybe it’s dead arm? — and if you have better options, I wouldn’t stop you from switching it up.

Vinnie Pasquantino – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 22nd homer, 2nd homer in two games, third homer in four games. Your move, Manzardo!

Dylan Crews – Will be activated on Thursday. He was out for so long I forgot he was out. He was placed on the IL with an oblique strain on May 21st. I think of this year.

Nathaniel Lowe – 1-for-3, 4 RBIs and his 16th homer, a grand slamami..salaami…salamee–Ugh, it won’t let me write salami about a non-Italian. Sorry, the vowel at the end of the name helps, Lowe, but the name Nathaniel doesn’t exist in Italy.

CJ Abrams – 1-for-4 and his 16th homer.  Member when he was demoted for being at a casino too late? A simpler time (last year). Whatever happened with Luis Ortiz and Clase? MLB is waiting until after the World Series for a 5 PM on a Friday news dump?

Nick Pivetta – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 2.87. Padres exploded for double digit runs and Pivetta jumped on the cruise to the Ivictory Coast for a free night at the W.

Ramon Laureano – 3-for-4, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and his 17th homer, hitting .294. Fun fact! His name backwards is Nomar Onaerual, former Red Sox great.

Troy Melton – 5 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, zero walks, 6 Ks, ERA at 2.82. Troy Melton from such PSAs as Is That Residue On Your Glass Rohypnol From Last Night That You Don’t Remember?; Don’t Wear A Loincloth On The Jungle Gym and Social Media Makes You Anti-Social was a superb stream by me! Melton’s command makes him safer than most rookie pitchers, but he’s also not officially in the rotation, unless the Tigers have moved to a six-man rotation, which they might.

Will Vest – 1 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 2.61, and his 18th save. Hinch randomly making Vest the closer now with Finnegan setting him up would be funny. Not haha funny though. This is now back-to-back games where Vest pitched the 9th for the save and Finnegan worked the 8th. Why? I haven’t the foggiest. Speaking of weather, there was a rain delay before Vest’s Monday save, so I figured it was nothing, but maybe it was something. Maybe Hinch figured Vest was only good in the 9th. Might want to grab Vest for the betterment of your saves.

Shane Smith – 5 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.01. Smith will be on a short list for a possible sleeper post next year. There is some real possibility long-term. Alas, Streamonator hates his next one and I don’t trust him enough yet.

Hunter Greene – 6 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 6 Ks, ERA at 2.47 as he was activated from the IL. He’s been out since June 3rd with groin discomfort. John Wayne Bobbitt rehabbed quicker. Since it’s not an arm injury, I have no problem firing up Greene, and I’m sure everyone rostering him feels the same way. Likely could’ve just been a Kevin from ESPN blurb, but Greene’s been gone so long that I did a refresher. You’re welcome!

Miguel Andujar – 2-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 9th homer, 2nd homer in two games, third homer in four games. Laureano still feels like the biggest trade deadline acquisition (bat-wise, at least) to go to the NL, but you NL-Onlyers could’ve had Andujar for a tenth of the price. Or that week Marsee was available, that would’ve been nice, but not a trade acquisition.

Cristopher Sanchez – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 2.45. Someone tag Luzardo and Ranger Suarez to show them the proper way to regress.

Gavin Williams – 3 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 3.38. Benched him for his near-no-hitter, started him for this shellacking. Gavin me a heart attack!

Steven Kwan – 1-for-4 and his 10th homer. Josh Naylor should be every MLB player’s benchmark. If you have less steals than Naylor, you’re not trying hard enough. Kwan, 11 steals? Show more effort!

Jakob Marsee – 4-for-5, 7 RBIs and a double slam (2, 3) and legs (6). His first 13 games with the Marlins: hitting .436, 3 HRs, 13 RBIs, 8 runs, 6 SBs. He’s basically Ohtani, if Ohtani was still stealing like crazy. So, ya know, a better Ohtani. He’s basically the good Pete Crow-Armstrong. Call him PCYay! Is Marsee the greatest player ever? Consider it thoughtfully, then speak your answer into a bottle and cast it into the sea. Marsee hit .246 in the minors in 98 games with 14 homers and stole 47 bags. There’s nothing here that’s totally absurd, except for the average, but, when his average falls, everything else will fall a bit. He did have a 15.9 BB% in Triple-A, so the steals should remain, more or less. I’d grab him in all leagues, until he cools, at least.

Graham Pauley – 4-for-4 and his 4th homer, and 3rd homer in the last week. Marlins are filled with hot schmotatoes!

Xavier Edwards – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 2nd homer. I originally wrote “2nd hoer” and I guffawed. I might be a juvenile.

Eury Perez – 5 IP, 4 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.8. Okay, but his FIP for the game was good. [dodges tomato] What, I’m serious! So, not the best game, but that’s pretty unlucky to have only three baserunners and allow four earned.

Shohei Ohtani – 4 1/3 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 3.47, 1-for-4, 1 run. He became the 1st MLB pitcher since at least 1900 to leadoff with a triple. Records are scant before that, but it looks like Top Hat Fuddicuddy was the last in 1887. He famously wore a top hat with coat and tails while playing. He died of consumption in the 7th inning. Sad, but he got Quality Start.

Kyle Hendricks – 3 1/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 4.88. Dodgers being swept by a team that has roughly one and a quarter starting pitchers isn’t a great sign.

Taylor Ward – 1-for-2, 2 runs and his 29th homer, and 2nd homer in two games. Must’ve been sweet to homer off his former teammate and bookie.

Brandon Lowe – 1-for-5, 2 runs and his 24th homer, hitting .234. For what it’s Cronenworth, on the Player Rater, Lowe is the 2nd most valuable 2nd baseman for $/Game, behind Ketel (for players with at least 200 ABs).

Junior Caminero – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 34th homer, hitting .262. Because I was looking at for Lowe, Caminero is nearing the top 10 overall. We might not get him at a discount for a decade. Though, last time I might’ve said that for a Rays player it might’ve been Wander.

Drew Rasmussen – 6 IP, 1 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 5 Ks, ERA at 2.60. Guy’s on, like, a 75-pitch limit and teams can’t take one single pitch.

Lawrence Butler – 1-for-3 and his 16th homer. And you said he retired! Very funny!

Jeremy Pena – 1-for-4 and his 13th homer, hitting .318. Mean’s while, Carlos Correa enjoyed a planned off-day. Also, his 13th.

Yainer Diaz – 2-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 17h homer, hitting .254. It’s Yainer’ing men! Halleberrylujah! Speaking of which, did you see in the “news,” David Justice said he divorced Halle Berry (in ’97!) because she wouldn’t cook for him? Laughed for two days about that. The real shame is his friends didn’t shut him down the first time he said that nonsense. “I divorced Halle Berry because she didn’t make me spaghetti–” “Bro, no, you can’t say that. You sound legit dumb.”

Hunter Brown – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.45. I’d say it’s nice to see him return to being great, but he has a 2.45 ERA and a 1.89 ERA in August in three starts, so if I say that, I could get swirlied.

Bryan Abreu – 1 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 1.64, and his 1st save, and Josh Hader is headed for a 2nd opinion on his shoulder. That’s one more opinion than Abreu save, but Abreu could be a top five closer the rest of the way.

Walker Buehler – 6 IP, 4 ER, 4 hits, 4 walks, 3 Ks, ERA at 5.43. They got a good start out of Dustin May on Tuesday, then a bad one here from Buehler, but fingers crossed for tomorrow’s start by Bobby Miller.

Ryan Mountcastle – 2-for-3 and a homer. What number homer? C’mon, the O’s moved their fences in, so how many homers does Mountcastle have? Do you need BBC’s favorite detective Mountcastle to solve it? C’mon, guess! Ooh, a little high. He has four homers! On the year! In over 200 ABs!

Trevor Rogers – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 6 Ks, ERA at 1.43. He’s pitching like he’s only facing Mountcastle.

Logan Gilbert – 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.31. M’s win a lot of one-run games. Most in the majors (26). I’m gonna tell ya why for free: Their pitchers give up no runs and they have no offense. Frank Voila!

Cody Bellinger – 1-for-3 and his 22nd homer, 2nd homer in three games. Cody likes the number 22 because he only has to remember one number.

Cam Schlittler – 5 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.94 vs. Joe Ryan – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.72. Schlittler deserved better than a no decision, he thought. But then he thought, who deserves anything? And that sent him on a 40-year journey to understand life.

Lars Nootbaar – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 13th homer, hitting .230. Was about to remark how disappointing he’s been this year, and he has, but then I realized he has nearly the same number of homers as Gunnar, and I shuddered, and shuttered my head (put my head in an open window and had Cougs slam shutters on my head).

Alec Burleson – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 15th homer. Has been about as valuable on the Player Rater as Christian Walker, I’m pretty sure that’s an insult to both players.

Michael McGreevy – 6 IP, 3 ER, 7 hits, zero walks, 2 Ks, ERA at 4.41. This was a Streamonator call because it was vs. the Suckies, so, yeah, no dur.

Hunter Goodman – 1-for-1, 2 RBIs and his 24th homer and his 2nd homer in as many games. This was a pinch-hit homer, which I know very well because I benched him for someone else. Sonavabench! Why is Goodman ever out of the lineup? Just DH him! Though, the good news to this was JoJo Romero (1 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 2.36) blew the save and I don’t have him anywhere. Silver lining!

Merrill Kelly – 6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.36. Might be surprising to some that Kelly is near a top 20 starter. Oh, by the way, there’s really only 19 solid starters.

James McCann – 1-for-4 and his 3rd homer. McCann with the dong! It was college.

Ketel Marte – 4-for-5, 4 RBIs and his 23rd homer, 2nd homer in two games, hitting .297. For all the people who like to prorate Bregman’s stats like he’s played all year. Wait until they prorate Ketel’s stats!

Geraldo Perdomo – 1-for-3, 3 runs and a slam (13) and legs (19), hitting .286. Elsewhere, Jordan Lawlar walks on his hind legs past the TV like Santa’s Little Helper after Maggie was born.

Jake Burger – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 12th homer. In the preseason, “You go ahead and draft Christian Walker in the top 60 and I’ll take Burger 60 picks later!” Now, “Well, I was kinda right. It didn’t matter.”

Phil Maton – 1 1/3 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 3.02. Oh no, it’s a closerpocalypse! Whatever a Maton is, maybe we shouldn’t be filling it anymore. Robert Garcia has had his own issues in relief, so this might remain Maton for another opportunity or two. Or Garcia might get the next chance.

Adolis Garcia – Hit the IL an ankle sprain, and Evan Carter (2-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI, and his 13th steal) was activated. Rangers said, “We have one slot on this roster for a ‘High expectations yet disappointing’ player.” Wyatt Langford, Jack Leiter, Kumar Rocker and Josh Jung all moved into the shadows to avoid being seen.