I’m a big fan of the everyman. I consider myself the everyman. I’m every man’s everyman. A pioneer of normcore. Track pants and a blinking light on my car’s dashboard that either means my seatbelt isn’t on or I need oil. That is me. What better way to elevate the Everyman Culture, then to take part in a tourney where no one is smarter than anyone else. Enter the RazzSlam, a Best Ball tourney. Every everyman likely knows what a Best Ball league is, but, if you don’t, it’s when you draft a team and the computer manages it for you by choosing who are your best players, and you get those stats. It’s basically one fantasy league removed from the robots taking over and killing us all. Well, the last laugh is on you robots, cholesterol is beating you to the punch! Kinda love that Razzball is putting on a tourney (hosted by NFBC — thank you!) that no one really has any clue how to strategize. A true everyman experience. Oh, I’m sure there’s a few people who think they know the correct strategy for Best Ball, and a few of them might be right, but there’s an under 1% chance they know why they’re right, and it isn’t just luck. In some ways, Best Ball leagues are a lot like Best Ball strategies. Throw a ton of them out there and a few good ones will rise to the top through sheer force of players’ performances and nothing you’re actually doing. That’s the fun. Anyway, here’s my RazzSlam, a 42-round, Best Ball 12 team draft recap:
Psyche! Before we get into the draft, I am in the process of lowering projections in my 2022 fantasy baseball rankings by a week of games. The top 500 for 2022 fantasy baseball is automatic; my positional rankings will be more challenging. I have no insider info about the state of MLB. My guess has been for a while that we’d get a 154-game season, and would never see 162 games again, but who knows. Some people have told me May 1st is a more likely timeframe. All I know is Rob Manfred is large-scale douche canoe whose real job is to make Bud Selig look better in retrospect. Anyway II, my RazzSlam recap:
C: Omar Narvaez (19)
C: Carson Kelly (20)
1B: Ty France (10)
2B: Tommy Edman (7)
SS: Wander Franco (3)
3B: Rafael Devers (1, 12)
MI: Gleyber Torres (12)
CI: Gio Urshela (18)
OF: Kyle Tucker (2)
OF: Eloy Jimenez (4)
OF: Jesse Winker (8)
OF: Seiya Suzuki (11)
OF: Adolis Garcia (15)
UTIL: Mike Yastrzemski (21)
Bench: Raimel Tapia (24), Andres Gimenez (25), Eric Hosmer (27), Jose Miranda (30), Vidal Brujan (31),Willie Calhoun (33), Jurickson Profar (36), Tyler Wade (38), Manny Pina (39), Riley Adams (40), Leury Garcia (42)
P: Robbie Ray (5)
P: Lucas Giolito (6)
P: Max Fried (9)
P: Chris Bassitt (13)
P: Tyler Mahle (14)
P: Sonny Gray (16)
P: Mike Clevinger (17)
P: Noah Syndergaard (22)
P: Bailey Ober (23)
Bench: Tony Gonsolin (26), Cristian Javier (28), Nestor Cortes Jr. (29), Nate Pearson (32), Luke Weaver (34), Jake McGee (35), Jose Suarez (37), Robert Suarez (41)
OKAY, NOW THAT WE GOT ALL THOSE PEOPLE OUT OF HERE BY YOU SAYING YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE DOING — VERY SLY, BY THE BY. SO, HOW DO YOU REALLY FEEL ABOUT THIS TEAM?
I wasn’t being sly, I really have no idea.
I SHOULD’VE KNOWN.
Here’s the scoring so we can at least try to make heads or tails of the league:
We have a Best Ball War Room, that I suggest everyone use, because I use it, not because Rudy throws me a nickel every time I mention it. By the way, who’s got more nickels than me?
They’re gonna have to call in a favor to cover this bet pic.twitter.com/to26DNUpjJ
— Razzball (@Razzball) February 26, 2022
That’s right, I was drafting my RazzSlam team from Vegas, because I’m a high roller! I went to Vegas, with 42 cents, sat down at a penny-slot Willy Wonka machine, and deposited one penny after every pick for roughly 198 hours, because I am the whale all casinos want! Ended up down more than half my money, but I had a good time, and that’s what matters. So, back to the draft-a-roo-ski, here’s some points accumulated by players last year:
Trea Turner: 881
Fernando Tatis Jr.: 831
Jose Ramirez: 815
Gerrit Cole: 560
Why did I pick this very random sampling of 1st round picks to show you? Oh, I don’t know, maybe to point out how undervalued pitching is? Could that be the reason? Maybe, who’s to say! I could point this out every year, and next year someone will still draft a starter in the 1st round(s). Why? Oh, it makes no sense! Don’t ask me! The scoring is clearly slanted towards hitting, but people like to think they know best. That is the one trait that unites all fantasy sports people: They think they know best. Unfortch, as the league standings say at the end of the year, 11 of 12 people in each league won’t know better than one person. Ronald Acuña Jr. missed 80 games last year, and scored 516 points, just a hair off from Cole and Corbin Burnes (554). Would that change anyone’s mind about drafting a starter early? Nope, never, no way, nuh-uh! People are way too smart to be swayed by actual evidence.
SO YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE DOING BUT YOU’RE SURE YOU’RE DOING IT CORRECTLY? THIS SOUNDS LIKE EVERY OTHER DRAFT RECAP FROM YOU.
Unlike roto leagues, I think Points Leagues are more about exploiting the format than about what players you draft. Well, the players you draft are important, but it’s about how they play into the format. There’s more “format play” than “get the good players” play. For unstints, in this format, it seems to be mostly about top of the order guys who get a lot of hits and maybe steal a base or two. Last year, Raimel Tapia scored 415 points, and I got him at pick 277 overall. Tapia scored only 145 points less than Gerrit Cole? Yes, but, again, don’t whisper things like that into the air, while others are drafting starters way too high. It’ll only confuse them. To actually compare apples to apples, Dylan Carlson went about 150 picks earlier than Tapia and scored 440 points last year. This league seems to really love the batting average guys. Ty France scored 517 points last year, so I grabbed him. Mookie Betts scored only 516 last year. Sure, Betts had a down year, but I don’t expect that to get better and I like Ty Freedom a lot.
Just took my 9th and 10th picks — Max Fried and Ty France — or simply Friedom Fries #RazzSlam pic.twitter.com/LvEOkY41lp
— Razzball (@Razzball) February 23, 2022
YOU DIDN’T DRAFT ANY DECENT CLOSERS, SO, PRAY TELL, WHY, YOU BEAUTIFUL MUSTACHIOED BASTARD?
Since you don’t need saves for a Saves category, per se, I felt the safer bet was going with starters over closers, and, since I was gambling such high stakes during this draft, I had enough bets being made in the real world. (By the way, I was gambling in the same seat where Trishelle from The Real World: Vegas sat with no underwear. I waited in a five-hour line to get that seat.) Why are starters safer? Let’s take the top closer, Liam Hendriks. He had 586 points last year, averaging 8.50 per appearance. Giolito had 464 points, but averaged 15/appearance. So, on average, Hendriks had to make two appearances to top Giolito. Not impossible, but Giolito would only need one, which he always had, if healthy. Also, Giolito had a down year last year and was nearly the same as the top closer. Next, you don’t need to move very far down the closers’ ranks to lose almost the whole advantage. Aroldis Chapman scored 425 points and 7/appearance. So Aroldis would’ve needed more than two appearances in a week to beat Giolito’s average, and, again, Giolito didn’t even have a great year. Finally, iffy closers or great middle relievers? Nearly useless. Last year, Taylor Rogers had a 13.2 K/9, 1.8 BB/9, 3.35 ERA, but only 9 saves in 40 1/3 IP. He only secured 187 points and 4.70/appearance. Great year from him, and he was about the same as a horrific year from Mitch Keller, who had a 6.17 ERA and scored 4.50/appearance. Very late I did grab Jake McGee, because he scored 411 points last year, or 6.60/appearance, and I don’t believe he’s completely out as the closer for Camilo Doval.
ANY TAKEAWAYS THAT I CAN PRETEND ARE MY OWN INSIGHTS?
I did a little foot-stamping and teeth sucking when I saw I had the 12th overall pick, but I kinda liked getting Rafael Devers and Kyle Tucker with my first two picks. Sure, there’s a big difference between being able to get Vladdy, the Mini Impaler (924 points) and Devers (750), but it’s so nice to be able to get a top 3rd baseman in Devers, and not have to worry about that shizz again for a long time. Not saying to turn down the first few picks for the 12th pick, because of the points difference mentioned, but I enjoyed the 12th pick more than I thought I would. Also, and this is more about the act of drafting vs. the actual players, but it’s nice to be able to draft two picks back-to-back in a slow draft, then close the draft window for 10 hours — more time to count my pennies!
OKAY, THAT WASN’T AS HELPFUL AS I EXPECTED. WHAT CAN YOU TELL ME ABOUT SEIYA SUZUKI?
I’ll tell ya (no relation) about Seiya, I’ve recently fallen in love with him, due to the Seiya Suzuki projections that Rudy gave him in the hitter projections, and Coolwhip’s Seiya Suzuki fantasy. Maybe he’s just a 20/5/.270 hitter, but in this Points League format, that’s solid. Maybe he’s more on power and average too because *looks around, ducks under desk, whispers* upside. Either way, I’m leaning in as being pro-Seiya, thinking he absolutely signs, and if he doesn’t, then it’s see ya, Suzuki.
