Carlos Correa hit the IL with a fractured rib, and will be out three to four weeks.  He suffered the injury from a massage.  Kinda makes you respect Bob Kraft more.  Correa, “That isn’t the bone I want yanked!”  Masseuse, “That is called The Bulgarian Tickler.”  You’d think a Correa’n could handle an Oriental massage. Or maybe we should be asking which Cardinals exec was working undercover as a masseuse?  This is why I just sit in a Brookstone chair for 45 minutes or until a store employee asks me to leave.  When Correa is picked 120-ish in 2020, he’s gonna be a bargain!  The Astros said to replace Correa and the already injured, Aledmys Diaz, they will go with Jack Mayfield and Myles Straw.  More like Jack Junefield!  Amiright?!  I need a nap.  *shuts eyes for five seconds, claps hands*  I’m back!  Mayfield’s tearing shizz up in the minors (10 HRs, .938 OPS), but the Prospectonator is meh on him.  As for Myles Straw, aka the Straw that stirs the Myles, looks like he has blazing speed and might hit .220 with no playing time. As a dolphin might sing at karoake, “STRAW! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!” Now bring up Kyle Tucker aka Crush Hour!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Wade Miley – 7 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 9 Ks, ERA at…Guess.  Go ahead.  You know he’s not a great pitcher and everyone’s ERAs are awful this year, so guess Miley’s ERA.  C’mon, guess, you cowards!  It’s 3.25.  Zoinks.  About the same as Kyle Hendricks (8 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.09), who’s been *checks notes* great.  Great is .16 of an ERA better than Miley, to be exact.

Kris Bryant – 1-for-4 and his 13th homer.  Apizzarently, I shouldn’t have benched him this week. Sonavabench!

Kyle Schwarber – 1-for-3 and his 10th homer, 2nd homer in two games, and 4th homer in the last week.  That’s four times this week Joe Buck had to scream at his mom that it was just dried glue on their hand towel.

Dinelson Lamet – Began a rehab assignment at Lake Elsinore, which was in the House of Gryffindor.  Will see how long it takes Dinelson to get the wax off.

Chris Paddack – 5 IP, 4 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 homers allowed, 6 Ks, ERA at 2.40.  Yo, Regression Fairies, you need to take your rainbow cape and get the hell away from Paddack!

James Paxton – 4 IP, 0 ER, 0 hits, 2 walks, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.81, as he was activated from the IL.  Kevin from ESPN’s “Get Him In Your Lineup” Department said, “I’ve removed the three baby pools around my desk so you can’t demote me.”

Luke Voit – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 14th homer, hitting .262. Ya know who’s sneaking up on Pete Alonso again for the race for more fantasy value? No, not Ji-Man Choi!  Voit!  It’s his blurb!

DJ LeMahieu – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 5th homer, as he hit the bomb to leadoff the game, because I don’t hate him enough and he had to do that to Paddack.  Eat a D, DJ!

Gio Urshela – 1-for-4 and his 3rd homer, hitting .331. Once Didi returns, Urshela could be in for playing time squeezing. Similar to my dream food court storefront, Urshela ‘n Juice. It’s Orange Julius but the squeezers are dressed like Bond Girls.  Any investors?

Gleyber Torres – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 14th homer.  Also, an Orioles fan somewhere gets two for flinching.

Mitch Moreland – Hit the IL with a lower back strain.  More like Mitch Soreman! *dodgers tomato* Hey, cmon!  More like Mitch Ibuprofen! *dodgers head of cabbage* Okay, fine!

Mookie Betts – 2-for-5, and his 9th homer.  Mookie Best!

Jackie Bradley Jr. – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 4th homer, and, like, his 12th homer since I started telling you to pick him up last week.  If I had arrow emojis, I’d point up on JBJ and down on Chavis, which is likely how their lineup placement is going to be moving soon.

Andrew Benintendi – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 6th homer, hitting .260.  If you’re selling Benintendi, a .300 hitter, when he’s hitting .260, you’re doing this thing the wrong way.

Xander Bogaerts – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer, hitting .293.  I’m thinking everyone, except Chavis, is a Buy on the Red Sox.

Jose Ramirez – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs, hitting .209.  Whoa, we’ve hit a major Buy portion of this roundup.  As I said on Wednesday, you want Jo-Ram not hitting home runs, but getting on base.  I was totally against him in the preseason, as you know, but I never thought he was a .200 hitter.

Carlos Santana – 3-for-4, 4 runs, 5 RBIs and his 10th homer, hitting .284.  This was a record day for Carlos Santana.  Only without any studio musicians around him wearing bandanas to cover their baldness.

Brandon Belt – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and a slam (8) and legs (2), hitting .230.  Wonder if Belt ever dreams of playing in a hitter’s park. What do Belts dream about? Prolly not being just below Sandoval.  Of course, what we know from eight years of a Belt career, he will now hit another home run or three until going ice cold for six weeks.

Jorge Alfaro – 4-for-4, 1 run, hitting .278.  Hand to God, I thought if Alfaro ever had four hits in a game it would be four homers. I didn’t know he did singles.

Jose Leclerc – 1 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 5.24, as he started yesterday’s game. Great news for saves if you’re in one of those Benjamin Button leagues.  Those in Button leagues will be sad to know Shawn Kelley (1 IP, 0 ER) opened the game, and those pesky scorers gave him his 6th save.

J.P. Crawford – Hit the IL with an ankle sprain. The universe corrected itself because Tim Beckham (1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer) should’ve never lost his job. I know what the universe needs, I am an Earth Mother.

Wade LeBlanc – 5 IP, 3 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 6.99.  LeBlanc is mad at the Rangers for scoring so much on him. He thought they were friends.

Mallex Smith – 2-for-4, 1 run, 2 RBIs and his 13th steal, hitting leadoff again.  He should be at 100% owned.  Not because he’s anything special, but at least one team in every league must need steals.

Mitch Haniger – 1-fo5-5, 3 RBIs and his 14th homer.  We lost Mitch Moreland yesterday, but we gained Mitch Haniger.  Through every Mitch, turn, turn, turn.

Roenis Elias – 2/3 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 4.15, as he entered the 8th inning of what would’ve been a save opportunity before he mucked it up. Honestly, I’m not sure speculating on M’s saves is worth it. I guess, if twisting my arm, I’d say Brandon Brennan, and, no, I didn’t make up that name.

Jorge Soler – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 13th homer, hitting .245.  Looks to finally be shaking the BSOHL tag, while actually being BSOHL and losing his tickets to Lilith Ur-Merely-Fair.

Yoan Moncada – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer, hitting .277.  Everyone wants to mock their overlord (me), but Moncada since my sell last month has not been pretty. Having a month of 4 HRs and .240 in May, which is super pedestrian, if, ya know, he walked.

Lourdes Gurriel Jr. – 2-for-6, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 4th homer since he was called up with Cavan Biggio last Friday.  Hearing that Craig Biggio is changing his name to Lourdes Gurriel Sr.

Kevin Cron – 2-for-4, 1 run as he got the start over Christian Walker, which is what should be happening every day, especially in Coors.  Play The Grand Cronyon so he can hit it to Boulder!

Anthony DeSclafani – 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 4.97.  DeSclafani is unintentionally, yet appropriately written like Drunk SpongeBob.

Nick Senzel – 2-for-5 and his 4th homer, hitting .271. All I’ll say is I appreciate how the Reds put Senzel in at leadoff, and haven’t taken him from the lineup.

Jordan Lyles – Played catch yesterday.  Ray Searage held a boombox over his head and played Cat’s in the Cradle. It was a heartwarming scene.

Josh Bell – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 18th homer, hitting .345. Lost in the sauce (gravy?) of Bellinger and Yelich, Bell’s been a solid top three guy overall on our Player Rater.  What’s crazy (to me), you could’ve easily drafted the top 5 guys in one league (Bellinger, Yelich, Bell, Springer and Mondesi). Springer, Mondesi and Bellinger might’ve been tight, but doable.

Genesis Cabrera – 3 2/3 IP, 3 ER as he was recalled from Triple-A, taking Wacha’s rotation spot, i.e., Cardinals are upgrading from Atari’s Pac-Man to Sega.  Reports are saying Genesis woke yesterday in a puddle of sweat next to a puppet of Ronald Reagan in a Land of Confusion.  Makes sense that the Cards skipped over Poncedeleon, who has performed well, and went to Cabrera because he had a 6.35 ERA in Triple-A.  I’m using “makes sense” wrong here, aren’t I?

Bryce Harper – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 10th homer, hitting .243.  Such a Bryce move to beat up on a barely Triple-A pitcher.

Andrew McCutchen – 1-for-1, 4 runs, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer, hitting .261 (.385 OBP).  As Rudy told me yesterday, McCutchen is trying to get him a 16 in OBP and runs out of 15 teams in Tout, where he’s won two times in a row, and leading the field once again.

Scott Kingery – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 3rd homer, hitting .344.  I told you to pick up Kingery yesterday.  You didn’t listen?  Aw shucks.

John Means – 6 IP, 1 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.80.  Streamonator is a means to an ends, but it is not a means to Means, because it, rightfully, hates him.

Kevin Gausman – 1 IP, 8 ER, ERA at 5.56. Was ejected from another game. This time for throwing at Nats’ bats.

Juan Soto – 2-for-4, 4 runs, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer, hitting .291.  Please get hot, Soto, like the “Mythbusters girl blowing foam off a liter of soda that’s been exposed to multiple Mentos” hot.

Trea Turner – 3-for-6, 2 runs and his 8th steal, hitting .288.  I never want the Nats to leave Atlanta.

Howie Kendrick – 2-for-3, 4 RBIs, hitting .328. Kendrick keeps hitting just to make me feel bad. I believe this to be true.

Matt Adams – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 5th homer, hitting .259. Shut up, Inner Monologue!  “I didn’t say anything.”  I know you wanted to say, ‘You should’ve drafted Adams instead of Ryan Zimmerman in all those leagues.’  “Well, you kinda should’ve.”

Anibal Sanchez – 6 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 7 Ks, ERA at 4.47.  Nats jumped out to a huge early lead and the USS Anibal cruised out to the Ivictory Coast, cashing in a coupon for a free night at the W.  Streamonator loves his next start if you’re considering it.

Austin Riley – 2-for-4, 4 RBIs, and his 7th homer, hitting .375. If I forget next March, can someone remind me that I don’t want Riley in 2020, but want him in every league again in 2021.  Juan Soto, Bellinger and Acuña nah’mean.

Noah Syndergaard – 6 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.90 vs. Walker Buehler – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 4.03.  Owning top starters really makes you feel safe, right?

Pete Alonso – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 18th and 19th homer, hitting .264.  Not so fast, Luke Voit!  Alonso is now tied with Mark McGwire for most home runs by a rookie before June 1st. When they each set the record, they were balding. Alonso’s looks like genetics though.

Daniel Mengden – 4 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.05.  Something I don’t mention much, but should now there’s more Openers and Middlers, our Relievonator nailed Mengden and Smyly’s Middler spots yesterday. It is behind a paywall (free 3-day trial though, if you want).

Marcus Semien – 2-for-6, 2 runs and his 7th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games.  Hot schmotato alert!  Wait, I usually reserve hot schmotato alerts for guys under 50% owned.  Hmm, Semien might’ve made me jump the gun.

Mark Canha – 2-for-4 and his 9th homer, and 5th homer in eleven games.  Mark Canhaz schmotatoes.

Matt Olson – 1-for-4 and his 7th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games and he’s only played in 22 games.  Ya know, like, a homer every three games.  That’s downright La Stella-ish!

Griffin Canning – 6 IP, 1 ER, 3 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.06. Prolly should just own Canning at this point, but, for what it’s Werth, the Streamonator doesn’t love his next start, and I wouldn’t trust him there either.

Cesar Puello – 3-for-6, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 1st homer, in his 1st start of the year, because Trout was sidelined with a sore foot.  Fun fact!  Cesar Puello is a Latino Chicken Caesar, which the menu describes as, “It tastes like cumin is all over it vs. looks like c*m is all over it.”

 
  1. jason batteiger says:
    (link)

    16 teamer with holds added. i have barnes, brasier, rasiel, parker, wittgren, buttrey. drop brasier for one of: harper (MIN it’s probably him and he protects parker), sera anthony (moving up with morgan/neshek both out, but he’s been far worse than last year so far), diekman, j.guerra (been much better than bearclaw, might bump him eventually),

    • Give me Diekman of that group.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      I’d probably try Dominguez but no strong feeling on this group if you want Harper, do it.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I just picked up Harper in one league, fwiw… Agree with others tho, no real strong feeling on them

  2. DonnieB says:
    (link)

    Matt Barnes or Jose LeClerc for saves ROS?

    Who is the drop of Kingery,Odor or Tucker in a keeper? I can reserve one right now.

    Thank you all.

    • I’ll go with LeClerc as I believe the Rangers want him in that job. Barnes is going to be used in the high leverage situations whether that is the 9th inning or not. Of course, all that goes out the window if LeClerc’s shoulder and calf are any kind of issue, but seeing as he pitched yesterday, I’m assuming that’s not a big deal.

      Nots ure what you mean by reserve one right now, but of that group, it’s Kingery or Odor. Depends what you need a bit. Odor likely gets more in the HR and SB. Kingery seems like a safer bet for average. I’d hold Odor in a vacuum for the upside.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Barnes for me.

      I’d lose Odor.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agree with DT

  3. Manley Ramirez says:
    (link)

    “Wacha punched out like Nintendo, now Cabrera Genesis, I watch a lot of porn, man, but I couldn’t picture this.”

    C-Mart

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha

  4. Ante Galic says:
    (link)

    Grey!!

    Great write-up, but Shakespeare rolled over in his grave after reading Cuello’s blurb. He did have a smile on his face though, so well done.

    a. So, continue to be second in hitting but second-to-last in pitching. Thanks for the Kingery assistance, kudos to me for starting him at the U over Rodgers. Trying to shore up the pitching. Here’s your All-star lineup.

    Phegley
    Rizzo
    Muncy
    EduEscobar
    Story
    LaStella
    TreaT
    Dietrich
    Dahl
    Mallex
    Conforto
    Pence
    Kingery

    Bench – Rodgers, Chavis, Canha, Smith Jr., Broxton

    IL – Shaw and Springer

    Rodgers and Chavis are starting over Rizzo and TreaT who have the day off, moving Muncy to 1B. Though your comments on Chavis are not encouraging. He has been pretty bad of late. Rodgers too. Will see what’s out there and make an administrative decision.

    Pitching
    SP – Paxton (didn’t start him, could have used the Ks, but glad he’s healthy and 17 swinging strikes in 4 IP is pretty good), Giolito, Heaney, Syndergaard, McKay (as my prospect who might pitch this year)

    RP – Iglesias and Hicks

    IL – Glasnow

    Do you think Dylan Cease (on the wire) or Brendan McKay will get the call earlier? And who will make the bigger impact? Discussed at length with Prospector Mike yesterday but would love your 0.02$ and mustachio aura on the subject.

    b. Abbott and Costello quote of the day for May 30

    In the Navy is a 1941 film about a singer who tires of his career and joins the navy to escape it (More escapism from Abbott and Costello).

    Smokey Adams (Abbott): Did you ever go to school, stupid?

    Seaman Pomeroy Watson (Costello): Yeah, and I come out the same way.

    Poor, Lou. Gettin’ belittled yet again.

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • Slappy Jack says:
      (link)

      is Z.Gallen out there in your league? I have him over McKay and Cease right now, could be up anytime.

      • Agree with SJ. Gallen seems like he’s the next one to come up. The White Sox have all but said we likely won’t see Cease until around the ASB with the team not going anywhere. McKay just moved to AAA, but with the Rays only 1 game back of the division, they may move him along a little faster. The Rays may be the only team left concerning themselves with Super 2, but I’d imagine we are there or past that mark given all the call ups so far.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Cease for me. Gallen works too…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, thanks!

      A. Agree with others, I’m banking on Gallen next if speculating… Cease would be next choice

      B. Was this the one with the Andrews Sisters? That was a great flick

      • Ante Galic says:
        (link)

        Grey!!!

        The Andrews Sisters as themselves indeed. I love them too. So if I’m counting straight, that’s like 5 or 6 movies straight of Abbott and Costello that you think is a great flick. Amiright? I’ll try to keep ’em coming.

        Thanks for the Gallen advice.

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I love their movies, what can I say

          • Ante Galic says:
            (link)

            Grey!!

            Nothing further, your Honor!

            Just added to that All-Star lineup above Greg Allen (over Brendan McKay) and Nicky Lopez (over Brendan Rodgers). Next year Rodgers will be great. That’s twice that I’ve dropped him this year. Also have dropped Dwight Smith Junior. Sad really, but he’s done 0 in like 10 days. I love him, but…This is a professional fantasy RCL and we don’t have time to get sentimental.

            Cheers,
            Ante

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              HAHA, damn right!

  5. Brett says:
    (link)

    Holds/Saves league… Top 2…..

    B. Workman, Cishek, Leclerc, stash kimbrel, L. Jackson

    Thanks guys!

    • The Great Knoche says:
      (link)

      If you’ve waited this long on Kimbrel night as well play it out now. Jackson.

      • Jackson, Kimbrel, Cishek, Leclerc.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Kimbrel, Cishek for me

      • Strop on rehab assignment. Not sure Cishek loses the job, but enough to bump him down the list for me.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agree with DT

  6. Brett says:
    (link)

    Also, on a 12 team league

    Pitching is my strength…. Scherzer, Wheeler, Buehler, G. Marquez, Strahm, Soroka, Giolito, Quintana

    little weak at RP
    Janson, Leclerc, Cishek

    Think I should just drop Quintana for a Kimbrel stash?

    • I’d go ahead and make that move in a 12 teamer.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Sure

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agree with others

    • LenFuego says:
      (link)

      When you find yourself in a situation where it makes sense to drop a good player, it makes sense to first shop that player around to see what you can get for him. For Quintana, you might be able to land a RP you like that is already closing (Neris? Will Smith?) or you might be able to package him with another player for a 2 for 1 upgrade (e.g., Quintana and Gioloto for, say, Charlie Morton) and then use the empty spot to speculate on Kimbrel.

      If nobody bites, then sure, drop him for Kimbrel

  7. Sean says:
    (link)

    ever considered fantasy hockey? That’s my game. Season’s over. Giving baseball a go here for a season or more. D.Peralta and V.Robles just cleared waivers. My OF is Castellanos, Haniger, Mancini, and A.Jones. Drops/adds I should make?

  8. Fanciful Basesball says:
    (link)

    Maybe we need a new term: Hot Sototato Alert
    for when a guy that we think is really good, but his slump has made us begin to second-guess that, finally offers a glimmer of hope.

    An example could have come back when Jesus Aguilar hit all 3 of his HRs in 2 days: Hot Sototato alert!

    It works because people used to think it was sexy to drink hot Dr. Pepper!

    • Slappy Jack says:
      (link)

      Soto has been a .352 / 1.019 hitter for the last month
      I mean he’s no Derek Dietrich but I think he’s pretty good

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, whatever heats up the liter of cola!

  9. Succos Baseball says:
    (link)

    Grey,

    Lourdes going to be in the buy column this week with a weekend series in Coors coming up?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d guess so

  10. Jerry Kenly says:
    (link)

    One league I have both Sanchez and Alfaro. It’s a deep league and I never play Alfaro. Apparently, even when Sanchez has an off day because ESPN’s new launch sucks balls. I couldn’t get Alfaro in my lineup. SONOFABENCH!

    14 team lH2H league with 19 keepers

    4 yrs of Puig and 6 yrs Puk

    Or

    6 yrs Bichette

    I should take Puig and Puk? Right? We have minors rosters. So, Bichette or Puk doesn’t count against one of the 19.

    • Depends a bit where you are on competing, middling, or rebuilding. Anything other than a rebuild, I’d take Puig and the gamble on Puk coming back from his injury. If you’re rebuilding, I’d hold on to Bichette.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Lose Alfaro.

      Puig side unless you’re rebuilding.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agree with DT

  11. RicoSuave says:
    (link)

    Great work Grey!

    16 team H2H weekly points league… redraft

    for bench bat, do I hold on to Kyle Tucker or drop for Mallex Smith.

    Thanks

    • RicoSuave says:
      (link)

      My other OFs are Stanton (IL), Franmil Reyes, Dahl, and Buxton.

      • With only 3 active OFs on your roster, I’d probably hang on to Mallex or some other active player. I love what Tucker is doing in the minors and what he could do if he gets the call, but the Astros seem hesitant to call him or Yordan up, and I’m not sure Tucker gets promoted before Yordan either.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Tucker for me in a points league

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Thanks! Agree with DT

  12. Bond says:
    (link)

    Kingery or Rodgers for runs

    • I’m going to say Rodgers. Has more opportunity to move up in the Rockies lineup than Kingery does in the Phils.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Rodgers

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agree with DT

  13. Thundergunn says:
    (link)

    Benjamin Button league..Grand Cronyon..HA!

    Would you be selling high on Riley or holding? I’m set at 3B in a 14 team mixed 4 keeper Yahoo league. I have other upside guys to consider keeping like Eloy and Senzel, and could use pitching and or saves.

    What type of pitcher would you be looking to get in return?

    • It is probably the right time to sell on Riley. Don’t imagine his value gets much higher than we’re looking at now. I’d think somewhere in the 25-35 range among SPs is what you’d be looking at in a return. Maybe guys like Soroka, Paddack after a bad start, Strahm, Boyd. Might as well start high with a Bieber or Nola, but likely you end up below that grouping.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
      (link)

      Depends what you can get but sure.

      I’d want better than the first group listed by B_Don. Bieber, Nola, Flaherty, Marquez, Greinke is the range I’d target…