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Please see our player page for Jackie Bradley Jr. to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

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Astros’ lineup has some 80’s WWF vibes to it. Julks-Dubon being led by Captain Woo Cubano. Can’t forget, Jose Abreu (2-for-5, 2 run) at the plate as threatening as Cyndi Lauper when she’s beating on Captain Lou’s chest in the Girls Just Wanna Fun video. Or The Fabulous Martin Maldonado went 2-for-3, 2 runs with his 3rd homer. All they needed was Manaea to come through with Afa and Sika. By the way, what’s less pro wrestling than losing your acronym, WWF, to the World Wildlife Federation. First up, Mauricio Dubon went 1-for-4, 2 runs and his 1st homer. Altuve owners are Stan Gable yelling, “Hey, that’s my pie!” Then Corey Julks went 3-for-5, 3 RBIs, hitting his 3rd homer. But, leading the way, was Yordan Alvarez. Captain Woo Cubano went 3-for-4, 3 runs, 5 RBIs and his 11th and 12th homer, hitting .305. Woo has no speed and doesn’t seem like he’s been hot at any moment this year, and is still around a top 15 hitter on the year on the Player Rater. Truly one of the best and gets nowhere near enough acclaim. Or as Rowdy Tellez would say acc’laim. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The news coming across the wire read: Carlos Rodon has a forearm strain and is shut down for 7-10 days. Will start the year on the IL. Then became what I call the Sad Man’s March. Every March, you draft a bunch of teams, then you hear about an injury. Now you have a nerve-wracking click-through of every team you’ve drafted to see if you drafted that injured player. A bead of sweat accumulates on your brow. You open your first team that you drafted this offseason. Close one eye — the pain would be too much for both eyes! — then scan to the top of your pitching staff. No Rodon! No Rodon! You repeat, no Rodon! Then, like Tom Cruise trying to diffuse a bomb, you wipe your brow and open your next team. No Rodon! No Rodon! Then, as if you entered the latest Friday the 13th movie and about to open a closet, you open the next draft — NO RODON! You’ve beat the Sad Man’s March! You are victorious! Wait, then you realize you’ve drafted Yordan Alvarez everywhere and he still hasn’t picked up a bat. So, Rodon is out for a while; no one knows how long. Best case scenario for forearm strains in March is maybe back by May? I’m guessing here, obviously. Hence the question mark. I’m moving him out of my top 20 starters and into my top 40 starters, but to an area where I would not draft anymore. For every bit of bad news, there’s a separate but opposite bit of good news — that’s Grey’s Law of Fantasy. Clarke Schmidt and Domingo German both look good. I added Clarke Schmidt into my 2023 fantasy baseball rankings, and you can find his blurb in the top 100 starters, and moved up Domingo German in the top 500. Finally, my Pitchers’ Pairing Tool was updated. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Razzle Dazzlers, welcome once again to your weekly fantasy baseball injury report. The “Ambulance Chasers” article series mostly focuses on matters of the living. It is not called “Hearse Chasers” after all (but that could be an interesting spin-off).  However, give me a minute to opine about the Harry Caray hologram at the MLB Field […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Guess what, y’all?! A new Spencer Torkelson dropped! No, he’s nothing like that old Spencer Torkelson! For one, he’s not young! He’s more like a new older Spencer Torkelson! For two, the Tigers are calling up Kerry Carpenter because they have no conceivable reason to keep him down anymore, because of the stats he was putting up in the minors — .316/.384/.653 with 30 home runs and 75 RBIs in 96 games between Double-A Erie and Triple-A Toledo. That’s the Mecca of Ohio. It’s why it’s called Holy Toledo. He was on a recent prospect stash list by Itch, and I say stop stashing and start doing! Comerica Park sucks. More like Crummica! Owned it! But someone making that good of contact with that sorta power is worth a look in deeper mixed leagues. Let’s see if Carpenter can drum up some offense and make the Tigers’ stop feeling like Rainy Days and Mondays. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The Rangers must be looking for a Bubba sparks to rock it very well, because they’re calling up outfielder, Bubba Thompson (1-for-3). Looking at my fantasy team with no speed, “Ah, yeah, I found you, team with an outfield that is booty.” Seeing Prince Fielder’s poster in the Hall of Legends in Arlington, singing softly, “Booty, booty, booty, booty, rockin’ everywhere.” Walking into the VIP section of the loge deck, “Hit the player’s club for bout a month or two,” rubs pluot on shirt, “Get it ripe, get it right, hit it with a bite.” Okay, sorry! Bubba Sparxxx makes me laugh. So, the Rangers are calling up Bubba Thompson, whose minor league numbers are eye-poppingly gorge: In 80 games at Triple-A, he hit 13 homers and .303, with 49 steals. Get it ripe, get it right, steal a base on sight! He was in Itch’s top 60 outfielder prospects, and, one love to Itch, but even if he wasn’t, and he had 49 steals in a half season, I’d be interested, because the speed category for all of my fantasy teams is booty, booty, booty, booty, suckin’ everywhere. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Deejay, “Hey, welcome back to Bleday! We are your nonstop rap, hip-hop, trip-hop, bounce, cloud rap, road rap, Christmas rap, Hanukkah rap, Jerkin’, freestyle, trap, but no Jazz rap, he’s out with a stress fracture in his back. Now, let’s boogie for the 2nd half of the season!” Wait, that was me at the end. Was it clearly not me prior to that? Yes? Okay, great. So, JJ Bleday (2-for-4, 1 run and his 1st steal) was called up by the Marlins. Fun fact! Bleday is the rap station in Los Angeles. A less fun fact is Bleday was hitting .228 in Triple-A. He hits everything in the air, which isn’t bad for a power hitter, but it will mean not a lot on average, and, while he stole on Sunday, he doesn’t have a lot of speed either. Think a young Rhys Hoskins. Call him Mees Hoskids, because the JJ stands for Jar Jar. Bleday should see playing time, along with Bryan De La Cruz (2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 7th homer), because Jorge Soler hit the IL, i.e., Bryan De La Soler is plug one. Bleday, plug two. De La Soler, plug one. Bleday, plug two. Anyway. here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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We’ve done it! We’ve reached the end of the fantasy baseball hitter rankings for 2022 fantasy baseball rankings. Give yourself a big round of applause. I’d clap for you, but I have carpal tunnel from actually ranking all the hitters and writing all their blurbs and calculating all of their projections and– What exactly did you do? Oh, yeah, you read them. No wonder why your hands can still clap. Here’s Steamer’s 2022 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2022 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. Subscriptions are up and running, and you can already get Rudy’s Draft War Room. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2022 fantasy baseball:

NOTE: All 2022 fantasy baseball projections are based on a 162-game season, and will be until we hear definitively there will be less games, due to the CBA. Also, I’m going on the assumption the NL is getting the DH.

NOTE II: All my rankings are currently available on Patreon for the price of a Starbucks coffee, if you get one of those extra grande frappuccino jobbers. Don’t wait for the rankings to come out over the next month, and get them all now.

NOTE III: Free agents are listed as just that and not yet projected. Once a guy signs, I will write out their blurb and add in projections, or remove them, if they sign in an unfavorable place. They are ranked currently where I think they might be if they sign on for a full-time job.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Figured if I heard the first part of the sentence, “Finally, the Tigers went out and got their man,” it would be followed by a story about how a few tigers dressed up as humans, went to visiting hours at Joe Exotic’s jail and ate him. It didn’t mean that, but if the Tigers sign Carole Baskin, the Pirates will trade Bryan Reynolds to the Tigers for her. So, the Tigers signed Javier Baez, and I love it. Tigers are sneakily becoming my “Pick it to stick it!” Which translates to a team I put hundred schmools on to win the World Series, and they just miss the playoffs. Javier Baez is defined, for better or worse, for his lack of walks — wacks? Hey, that’s actually pretty good. “Baez is too reliant on wacks to be a reliable batting average guy.” Wacks seems to give off a negative connotation in the mind of fantasy baseballers (<–my mom’s term!). If you’re in an OBP league, then I get it, but I’m not talking about OBP when I say Baez is continually underrated, which, brucely, is one of the weirder peccadillos in fantasy. By the way, never say “peccadillo” aloud because that would give someone the right to punch you in the nose. I say it’s weird because Baez is exactly the type that most love more than is deserved in real baseball. It’s truly bizarre. Real baseball people love Baez, even though he is a liability with his wacks, but, for fantasy, he’s underrated. I see Baez and want to “wacks” poetic. Comerica isn’t particularly fun-loving, so Baez has gone from Friendly Confines for power to neutral in Metco to a team whose player most synonymous with home runs was Matthew Boyd. Still, a guy who averages 27/15/.265 has my attention, and I’m ready to get my Baezian wacks. For 2022, I’ll give Javier Baez projections of 84/25/91/.257/14 in 541 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for fantasy baseball:

Psyche! Promise you sleepers are starting tomorrow, unless there’s some other big signing during the lockout, which is illegal, but what are legalities except illegalities that wear frilly shirts. Also, I’ve begun to roll out my 2022 fantasy baseball rankings on our Patreon. Anyway II, the roundup:

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What is up good people! I’m stepping in for the esteemed Daniel Anthony Pants, who is off at the “Resize your Levis” event in northern Saskatchewan. I don’t know if that’s a weight loss clinic or adult briss event or…I mean, DAP, you do you! But of course, Señior DAP takes the day off when there’s a FIFTEEN game slate. What is this, America’s birthday or something? Hah! Got you. Articles of Confederation ain’t the “‘Mericuh” that I got tattooed across my lower back when I was 18. If John Hancock was only around to sign that! ENYWHEY. Whatever you’re doing this weekend, hopefully, you’re meditating on the love for your fellow human. And if you’re shooting off fireworks, for the love of DAP do it away from the city and nowhere near a dry prairie, please. Let’s move on to the one thing that binds us all across geographies and political divides: imaginary baseball team management!

Here’s what I saw on the June 2 slate in MLB:

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Bobby bombs! Cleveland first baseman Bobby Bradley has been hotter than a Tiktok thirst trap since he was called up last weekend and continued that trend Friday night as he went 2-for-3 with his second home run, three runs batted in, and two walks. He’s 6-for-13 to start his major league career with five runs scored and six RBI! And not to knock the Jake Bauers but the Injians have managed to score 32 runs in just four games with Bradley in the lineup. Uhh, spit-take!? Yup. The 25-year old has all-or-nothing power for days, as evidenced by his nine homers in just 26 games at AAA. He also slashed .303/.314/.636 with two home runs and 11 RBIs in 13 spring training games, so this is not entirely out of left field. ACKCHUALLY he plays first base. And although we’re likely to see just as many strikeouts from Bradley as long balls I likes what I sees so fars! Speaking of Bobbys that strikeout and homer, I’ve got another one for you! That’s right, a bonus Bobby, aka Bobby Dalbec aka Bobby D., aka every pink hat’s future heartthrob by the end of October. He’s got dark flowing locks and power to spare. He hit a monster 440-footer Friday night and the balls were flying off his bat. I’ve mentioned Dalbec before because of his raw power and affinity for striking out (2 Ks Friday night). That 36.8 K% (67 strikeouts in 170 ABs) is real, but according to Manager Alex Cora, Bobby’s been working on a leg kick that’s improving his timing. It’s yet to be seen if this will have a positive effect but he’s 3-for-8 with a homer and double since the changes only struck out twice Friday night, so baby steps? Hank Hill would tell you these boys ain’t right, but I think both Bobbys are worth a look for those in deeper leagues who are powerless and in need of some pop, especially if they continue to hit as they have been the past couple of days. It’s the Bobby Bombs Buy Bonanza!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Prospect Itch started touting Tucker Davidson in 2019, then added this year, “A hard-throwing lefty with command issues.” Just about sums up Tucker Davidson, doesn’t it? If you saw the clip of him this winter at Driveline, you know why his name is Tucker, because he was throwing in his underwear. He doesn’t jam hitters, he will Jame hitters, as in Jame Gumb. Tucker Davidson isn’t a game show host, he’s a Jame show host. He doesn’t just drop in a 79 MPH curve, he puts it in a basket and lowers it into a hole. His stuff — well, impressive, but nine of ten dentists agree there will be caveats. Since it was one of two games on early yesterday, I watched Davidson (5 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 5 BBs, 5 Ks, ERA at 2.31), and he looks like he is a bad luck start away from a 2/3 IP, 7 ER outing with very little idea where the ball is going. Luckily, the hitters don’t really know either. Could see using the Streamonator, and maybe risking it all for the rookie nookie, but he’s dangerous, due to his command.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?