This past preseason I went to Japan, which is close enough to Korea, so I am an expert on Korean Baseball Organization’s import Erick Fedde (6 IP, 1 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 11 Ks, ERA at 2.73.) Do I know for sure the O in KBO stands for Organization? No, it could stand for Okily Dokily. These MLB flame-outs, who go to KBO and reinvent themselves, then return give me the opposite of je ne sais quoi. Je ne sais meh, you could say. If they were so good, they wouldn’t need to reinvent themselves. I come around if they come back and look good, i.e., I didn’t continue to dislike Merrill Kelly. Funny how one game’s worth of stats can change a player’s outlook dramatically. It was just yesterday I looked at Erick Fedde’s numbers and saw a 8.4 K/9 and 4 BB/9 and je ne sais meh’d him. Big sloppy raspberries of the lips with spittle flying everywhere. Then, wiping spittle off the screen, and seeing Fedde’s numbers are now 10.3 K/9 and 3.1 BB/9. From a whatever 4.26 xFIP to a “Tell me more” 3.33 xFIP. Guess my point is it’s very early to be declaring a guy is this or that. Am I completely sold on Fedde now? No, but I’m absolutely a cyclops with a monocle in case Fedde goes from meh to quoi. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Eloy Jimenez – 2-for-3, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and a slam (2) and legs (1), and his 2nd homer in three games. Hold up. Eloy stole a bag? Did they give him a 79-foot lead? Did he pull his hammy and quad? Was he stretchered off the field? I need deets!
Trevor Larnach – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer, and 2nd homer this week. He’s definitely gonna find his way into this week’s Buy, that’ll be on the Patreon later today.
Byron Buxton – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 1st homer, hitting .247. Uh-oh. He either produces and gets hurt or stays healthy and does nothing. Stay cold, Bux!
Triston Casas – Diagnosed with a rib fracture. This the worst barbecue ever! Red Sox are saying he’ll be out a while, which is the most hilariously useless timetable. Why not just say he’ll be back at some point in the future? Nootbaar was diagnosed with fractured ribs on March 8th and returned April 12th, but everyone is different and Nootbaar is a freakin’ candy bar so who knows. I’d hope for five to six weeks for Casas, think realistically the All-Star Break but expect August 1st.
Wilyer Abreu – 1-for-4 and his 2nd homer, as he hits cleanup for the Sawx. Okay, so the Sawx only have two hitters right now, but don’t hold that against Abreu. He went 22/8/.274 in Triple-A last year in only 86 games. More like 86 him off your waivers! High five me right now! No? Okay.
Ben Lively – 6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 hits, zero walks, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.38 vs. Tanner Houck – 6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 1.65. This matchup was billed as, “Damn, that’s a Lively pitch, and I’m not talking about Lively!” Okay, that’s nice. What is nice is Lively’s stats. They’re the Lively’est! I don’t know if he’s figured something out or it’s a small sample thing, but Lively’s numbers are 11.1 K/9, 0.8 BB/9 and a 2.65 xFIP. Prolly small sample, as women derisively say, but I’m definitely monocle’ing.
Heston Kjerstad – 0-for-4, 3 Ks, as he hit 8th. He’d be the cleanup hitter for roughly 25 other teams.
Gunnar Henderson – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 7th homer, hitting .287. Right now it looks like two leadoff hitters (Gunnar, Betts) are frontrunners for their league’s respective MVP.
Grayson Rodriguez – 4 1/3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 4.45. Not saying I’m rooting against him, but he terrorized me last year. Like blowing anthrax in my face every start.
Mike Trout – 1-for-4 and his 9th homer. Finally got rid of that anchor Ohtani out of there!
Jo Adell – 2-for-3, 1 run, 1 RBI and his 3rd caught stealing. Silly perhaps, but I love seeing caught stealings. It means he’s trying! I love that! Wash loves speed, and also running his players.
Kevin Gausman – 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER (3 unearned), 8 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 5.57. Two strikeouts, getting goosed by Vlad Jr.’s inability to make a simple catch at 1st for unearned runs and losing the win, and I’m going walk into the bathroom and scream. Excuse me.
Tobias Myers – 5 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks, as he was called up. I watched him but first my quote from yesterday then catch me on the other side, “Myers has a gravity-defying four-seamer, interesting stats in the minors (11 K/9 last year in 137 2/3 IP), and caused nary a peep from peep-les when called up. Maybe because the results (5.03 ERA last year) haven’t been great. Myers feels like he could come up, throw nasty and get on mixed league radars very fast.” And that’s me quoting me! Think the lack of excitement about Myers is wrong. He throws a bye-bye-baby curve, nasty cutter, an ‘okay daddy, I’m your son now’ slider and a fastball that literally goes up. Kinda interested in him in mixed leagues. Not shallow ones, but 15-teamers? Yeah, absolutely.
Andrew McCutchen – 2-for-4 and his 3rd homer, 2nd homer in as many games. Hot schmotato alert!
Bailey Falter – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.33. Funny that he went against Tobias, who excites me so much, and Falter throws a better game and I’m yawnstipated. Streamonator hates him, I hate him. We are not BFFs, BF.
Merrill Kelly – Hit the IL with a shoulder strain. Specifically, it’s a teres major strain, but a minor strain of the teres major. So, a minor pain of the major? Very confused, and sounds like the DBags are too since Kelly has no timetable. My guess is months, not weeks.
Christian Walker – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 4th homer. Onward Christian homerer!
Pavin Smith – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 6 RBIs, and his 1st homer. Pavin the lead!
Kevin Newman 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer. Hey, Corn pop, that’s Newman’s own! Also, the DBags destroyed Long Island’s own, Steven Matz (4 1/3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 5.55), except for Eugenio Suarez (1-for-5) who struck out four times, which feels like a record in a game where they scored 14.
Tommy Henry – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 5.55. Tom Hank making the Cardinals seem Terminal.
Anthony Rizzo – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer. HR to the Rizzo!
Shea Langeliers – 1-for-4 and his 5th homer. Sure, I mean, obviously he’s better than Aaron Judge. Was gonna rank Langeliers in the top 7 overall. Oh well.
Julio Rodriguez – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer. He usually doesn’t get hot until May 1st, so we’re getting an extra week of JRod this year! (I don’t want to jinx anything, but I’m in first in one league where I spent all my auction money on JRod and Judge. Quite possibly the two worst guys so far to spend money on. Didn’t hurt I spent $1 on Ozuna and $4 on Tyler O’Neill. Oh, and $7 total on Berrios, Ranger Suarez and Kikuchi. Okay, too early for victory laps, but Cole Ragans went for $21 and I got those three for $7.)
Cal Raleigh – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 6th homer, hitting .271, in the three-hole spot, and 4th homer in five games. Baby got back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back-back.
Brendan Rodgers – 1-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 1st homer, a grand slam. Just picked him up for Monday’s game, to hold him through Mexico’s games, but dropped him before Tuesday’s, because I’m an idiot. Doing everything wrong in my RCL league. Let’s move on, before I seppuku Shogun style.
Logan Webb – 8 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.33. Hindsight yadda, but he was going after Nola, Gausman and Pab-Lo in drafts.
Lane Thomas – Stole his 11th base, but injured his leg. And I injured my mouse clicky finger picking up James Wood. Didn’t seem super serious to Thomas, but we can dream, can’t we?
Max Fried – 9 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, 6 Ks, ERA at 4.97 vs. the Marlins, i.e., Yum, Fried Fish.
Adam Duvall – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer. He always follows one homer with another. Don’t try to point out how he didn’t homer after his 1st. It’s not cool to be using logic with me.
Taijuan Walker – Set to return on Sunday, which pushes Turnbull out of the rotation possibly, i.e., Turnbullpen.
Elly De La Cruz – 1-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (7) and legs (12). What a terrible call saying he was overrated. He’s Elly and I’m wearing an L. He’s on pace for a 40/70 season! My God, am I dumb. Think it’s better to take the L and move on, rather then dig in my heels and pretend he’s going to be bad. Still hate his K% but he’s clearly above frivolous things like strikeouts when he’s hitting 125 MPH moonshots.
Andrew Abbott – 4 1/3 IP, 1 ER, ERA at 2.60. He walked the bases loaded and got yanked with a 5-1 lead. I know this because that was the point when I Hulk-smashed my TV to the ground. And now the Streamonator hates his next start, and I don’t know if I can risk it, which means I will bench him and he’ll throw a no-hitter. Sweet!
Riley Greene – 2-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 4th and 5th homer. Also, in this game, Isaac Paredes (2-for-4, 2 RBIs) hit his 6th homer. As two of my preseason sleepers came together to talk me off the edge labeled, “Elly De La Cruz is great, you idiot.”
Mark Canha – 2-for-4 and his 5th homer, and 2nd homer in the last two days. Hot schmotato? Sure, but also I’m thinking about how Canha is replacing Judge this year in the Home Run Derby.
Kenta Maeda – 5 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 5 Ks, ERA at 5.96. Looks like I bailed on Maeda one start too soon. His velocity was up on all his pitches yesterday, and looked more like the pitcher I drafted. Great!
Colin Poche – 1 IP, 3 ER, ERA at 6.75. Jason Adam stock went up in a game he didn’t pitch. Play the lottery, Adam.
Framber Valdez – Says he could return this weekend in Mexico. Hey, I don’t have Framber anywhere, was avoiding him everywhere, but if anything I know about Mexico and how the ball jumps there, I’d advise against using Framber there. (Also, might want to start stashing hitters who will be in Mexico.)
Jordan Wicks – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 hits, zero walks, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.70. Dropped Wicks in one shallow league and he was immediately scooped up. Underestimated his pull. The allure of the wild strikeout pitcher. Some see it on waivers and think, “I can fix him,” I see, “My ulcer is flaring.”
Cody Bellinger – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 5th homer, hitting .226. [Cody, stoned, reading my Wicks blurb] His pull on what, brah?
Mike Tauchman – 2-for-3, 4 RBIs and his 1st and 2nd homer. He’s got the Tauch!
Kyle Hendricks – Hit the Ineffective List. Hard to say when he’ll return since he hasn’t been good in four years. Maybe June?
Drew Smyly – Hit the IL with a hip impingement. Not so Smyly now, are you?!
Garrett Cooper – DFA’d as the Cubs called up Matt Mervis. I blame the Cubs’ intern who put on Counsell’s desk a note saying, “We don’t need Cooper, we have Mervis,” and letting that note get covered in Chinese takeout menus. In an O. Henry-esque twist, Cooper said to Counsell, “Hey, Coach, can I see the 17 menus you have? I’m craving hot and sour soup and not sure which place I wanna order from…” Counsell said, “Here, take them all…What’s this? We have a guy named Mervis?” Cooper gulped, and it was not the soup.
