Buy A Shot Of Mead With A Curtis-y Discount

Washington Nationals third baseman slash former Rays top prospect slash pride of the Australian Outback slash heartthrob Curtis Mead had two hits Friday night including his eighth home run, a 2-run shot that gave the Nats the lead in the first. The 26-year old Aussie is now slashing .244/.360/.496 with 22 RBI along with three steals and a .856 OPS. Does that Mead your expectations? The former top 100 prospect who is most famous for being the return to the Rays in the Cristopher Sanchez deal (oof, that stings I know), is showing off some elite advanced metrics as well with a 45.5 hard hit percentage and 11.1% barrel rate. Crikey! Did I mention he’s Australian? Several times now? His 16.7 K% and 14 BB% are also career bests, mate! He struggled with his approach, plate discipline and chasing pitches in the minors but he’s shown major improvement in this area posting a .360 OBP so far. Most intriguing of all, more than the .374 xwOBA even, he looks to be playing everyday and currently hitting in the three-hole in a stacked Washington lineup sandwiched between two All-Stars who are top five this year in OPS: James Wood (.959) and CJ Abrams (.936). Minor tangent while I s/o to the Nats front office. They have youngest GM and youngest Mr. Manager in baseball, everyone thought they were gonna suck, like 2025 Rockies bad, and they are currently top five in every offensive category and lead the league in runs scored! They’re rebuilding but they put an entertaining product on the field, and they’re playing.500 beisbol! Back to Curtis, Mr. Manager Butera might be on to something protecting his young hitter like this, giving him the potential to succeed. He could be ahead of his time! Curtis was a BUY and is available everywhere he may just be hot but if something has clicked he’s in a great situation to succeed throughout the season. Get him now for a Curtis-y discount, a bit of Mead could go a long whey!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Fernando Tatis Jr. – 3-for-5, run, RBI. It’s honestly wild that he still doesn’t have a home run, but the fact that he tested positive for PEDs a couple years ago makes it so so much worse. I don’t care about his exit velocity. Three players have twenty. Chris McAdoo has more homers. He’s cursed. The Knicks made the finals before Tatis hit a home run. We’re going to get GTA 6 before Tatis homers. No I wouldn’t trade for him, I’m hoping I can claim him off waivers in a few more weeks after his owner rage drops him. Rip.

Lucas Giolito – 2.2 IP, 5 hits, 4 ER, 4 BB, K. I’m not sure how the Padres thought signing a guy with a 89 mph fastball was a good idea.

Brayan Bello – 7.0 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, 5 K. Bello! Me say Bello. Another Red Sox game comes and me want to go home. Boston’s former future Ace has a 2.67 ERA in May, but can’t pitch the first inning anymore because…? I’m not really sure. He did it for years. He’s got a 0.71 ERA, 0.91 WHIP and 22/3 K/BB in relief this season, and 5.63 ERA, 1.64 WHIP, 40/21 K/BB if you include the first inning. Clearly, just give him an opener the guy is nails after the first? Boston openers before Bellow have a 20.25 ERA, 3.75 WHIP, allowing nine runs in four games. What do you do with that? Just another disaster for this front office. Additionally, Roman Anthony has been shut down again after a ligament in his ring finger went missing. They just flat out lost it. No timetable for his return.

Tyler Samaniego – 1.0 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, 3rd L. These should all be charged to Bello’s ERA.

Grant Holmes – 4.2 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, BB, 5 K. What about granting second Holmes? I’m looking for something by the water. Holmes had back-to-back solid matchups up and back-to-back solid starts, Great American Ball Park is not ideal. He’s a streaming playing methinks. Next week at home versus Toronto? That’ll play!

Chris Paddack – 5.0 IP, 7 hits, 4 ER, 3 BB, 7th L. How are you still in the league? I felt bad for my real life human friend who’s in last place in our H2H league so I streamed Paddack against him. I know. I’m actually a great guy. It’s unfortunate for Chris you can’t really “tank” in baseball like you can in the other sports or he could really get paid.

JJ Bleday – 2-for-3, HR (8). Cause his hits go deep! So deep! I have to say, today was a good Bleday! Two homers in the past week! He’s cooled down a little since his call up but not a lottle!

Nathaniel Lowe – 1-for-4, HR (9). A BUY! Grey mentioned there are more first basemen at the top of the player rater than any other position. Why am I still starting Tyler Soderstrom? No wonder I’m depressed.

Ronald Acuna Jr. – 1-for-3, HR (4). Tildaddy says no more screen time until you watch daddy’s highlights! That was a shotski alright! The 38th leadoff home of his career! Only four active players have more, can you guess? I’ll just tell you: George Springer, Mookie Betts, Kyle Schwarber and Jose Altuve. Fun tangent, but back to Ronnie. He’s batting under .200 over the past two weeks, but with homering in back-to-back games maybe he’s finally heating up.

Spencer Horwitz – 2-for-4, BB. BUY. Spencer’s gifted us with a .350 batting average and three home runs, 6 RBI and a steal over the past two weeks. He also led off yesterday which is the most interesting to me. Well, besides the back of Spencer’s. That’s the most interesting!

Konnor Griffin – 2-for-4, RBI, 2 SB (14). I go to Spencer’s every weekend for my prescription fart pills and despite their reliability it’s time for Konnor to lead off permanently. He’s hitting .301 in May with two home runs, 9 RBI and 7 steals. I want him on all my fantasy teams.

Bryan Reynolds – 1-for-3, HR (6), 2 RBI. Only six homers? No wonder everyone calls you boring. No! Not me, but, others.

Oneil Cruz – 1-for-3, HR (12), 2 RBI. The Cruz Missile launches a splish splash wet one into the Allegheny! Take me to the river! FOUR HUNDO FITTY BABY! The no doubt no doubter! It was apparently just the seventh homer to clear the right field fence at PNC into the river which is pretty remarkable. And the best part? Because Apple TV was streaming the game not a single camera caught it happening. Regardless, someone get this guy in the derby.

Kody Clemens – 1-for-4, HR (6). Clemens launching his sixth rocket! If we composed a whole team of nepo babies from throughout the league would Clemens make the starting lineup?

Jared Jones – 4.1 IP, 7 hits, 5 ER, 2 BB, 6 K. Kevin from ESPN’s Get Him In Your Lineup department knows better than to start a guy fresh off Tommy John surgery. I know the matchup was juicy but don’t undersell Kody Clemens, y’all. Jonesy gave up three bombs but the four seamer topped out at 101, he had six strikeouts to just three walks and his stuff was *pinched finger* molto bene! I get we’re Jonesing for him to be back BACK but it will take time. That said if he’s available in your league grab him!

Taj Bradley – 4.0 IP, 5 hits, 4 ER, 2 BB, 6 K, ERA at 3.21. Regression fairies loved Mandalorian and Grogu. They don’t think every Star Wars movie needs lore if they’re “just fun,” they prefer CGI and AI slop to practical effects and puppets, they think all the characters should have cute baby versions and they will destroy your ratios.

Samuel Basallo – 2-for-3, HR (9), 2 RBI. Went back-to-back with Pete Alonso (11). Samuel the Man-uel’s got four homers in the past two weeks and hitting .350 over the past month and is just about the only prospect on the team who hasn’t been somewhat of a let down. If I were the Orioles I would first get a crab cake and a Natty Bo at Camden. Then I would trade Basallo for a starter before I destroyed his value. Remember Heston Kjerstad?

Jackson Holliday – 2-for-4, HR (2). Speaking of disappointing prospects, is it the injuries? Sometimes these guys burst on the scene with success the O’s just can’t keep them healthy? They should get the doctors from the Pitt.

Trevor Rogers – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, BB, 3 K. It was going so wellllll. I have been a defender of Rogers somewhat who has an inflated BABIP and some bad defense has somewhat led to his 6.84 ERA (yikes). He’s available in one of my leagues and saw he was carrying a shutout into the seventh inning, went to grab him and stopped myself right before he gave up two homers. I’m not Mr. Manager, but maybe pull him after the first 2-run bomb? He does get the Red Sox next week and they can’t hit anything but hard to trust Trev right now.

Charles McAdoo – 1-for-4, HR (1). The first career hit and home run for McAdoo-do! Well how do you McAdoo! Have a day rook! Hate to ruin the moment but looks like that ball really injured someone? As for Charlie, he profiles as more of a utility players, which seems to be almost every player on the Jays.

Yandy Diaz – 2-for-5, 2 HR (10), 3 RBI, slashing .313/.392/.523. Yandy makes me dandy times two! Batting .375 in the past two weeks with five home runs! If you thought last year’s power just came from the wittle baby bawlpawk can confirm he is actually huge now. Swole tanks and hits for average? He’s a top five first baseman and his .313 batting average is first in the AL! I know! That’s not even that high! No one hits baseballs anymore.

Nick Martinez – 7.0 IP, 8 hits, 2 ER, 5 K, 5th win. N-Mart is famous for his draft day deals. He now has seven quality starts and on the Rays that’s harder to do than you think. He also lowered his ERA to 1.62 on Friday which is second only to Cam Schlittler at 1.50.

Walbert Urena – 6.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, 3 BB, 5 K. Wally, can I call you Wally? No. OK, Mr. Urena got me a solid streaming win last Sunday and despite all my better judgement I held him for this start and wowee Wally! You’re a monster!  Outside of the home runs he surrendered in the first, he settled in nicely and got 12 whiffs and lowered his ratios to 2.44 ERA and 1.38 WHIP. He gets the Rockies on the road next week and I could see considering the prospect of maybe thinking about mulling over the possibility of contemplating whether or not I should review the option of potentially picking him up. I still don’t know for sure, though! Surely pushing my luck here but like Mark Walbert I’ll just pray and say hi to your motha for me!

Vaughn Grissom – 2-for-5, 2 RBI. If you’re batting Grissom third, you might as well trade for Chris Paddack at this point. Do better Angels!

Max Meyer – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 5 ER, 3 BB, 6 K, ERA at 2.97. Who was girlbossing a little too close for the sun for the Regression fairies and had to be taken down a peg I guess. He was bordering Ace status before this start, and still looked good outside of a rough first inning with a 30% CSW and his first start over 100 pitches. He settled down and managed to keep his team in the game and is still the only qualified starter without a loss.

Pete Fairbanks – 0.1 IP, 1 hit, ER, 3rd L, ERA at 7.35 ERA. Are you sure you didn’t come back from the IL too soon? I’m pretty sure you did.

A.J. Ewing – 2-for-4, run, 2 RBI, SB (4). Someone is hype for the Knicks in the finals!

MJ Melendez – 1-for-1, HR (3), 3 RBI. Walk off two run home run! It was the first walk off of MJs career and he absolutely pimped this one.

Shota Imanaga – 5.1 IP, 5 hits, 5 ER, BB, 2 K, 3 HR. More like Imana-ugh. Shota in the heart as they start another 10 game losing streak. Imanaga’s allowed 10 homers in his past five starts and his ERA has ballooned from low 2s to 4.37 in that time, giving up 20 earned runs over his past three starts.  The Cubs as a team have given up 82 home runs this season! No wonder they’re losing. As for Shota, he’s still missing bats and throwing hard, the WHIP is somehow still a sparkling a 1.07  it’s those darnded long balls! It’s hard to know what to do with this guy. It’s only gonna get harder in the summer at Wrigley. I guess I’ll just keep starting him until I sink deeper and deeper into obscurity.

Ian Happ – 2-for-4, HR (13), 3 RBI. Slump busted! Hitting .364 with three homers and 11 RBI (ELEVEN) in the past week. You guessed it, he’s facing me in head to head this week! I finally get to face Tatis next week so we can really test our theory about the fantasy baseball gods punishing me for stashing that active guy on the IL for weeks without making moves.

Ivan Herrera – 1-for-3, HR (7). Ivan the Herrerable! Only Sal Perez and Langeliers have more at bats than Herrera and when I’m looking for a catcher that’s more or less what I’m looking for. Potential!

Nelson Velazquez – 2-for-3, HR (1), 3 RBI. This was Velazquez’ first game in almost two years and he was itching boy, immediately tying it up with a 3-run blast. A little country grammar on that one! Obviously St. Louis is gonna love a guy named Nelly.

MacKenzie Gore – 6.1 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, BB 3 K, 4th win. The 3.96 ERA is hella cringe AF but the situation is still chopped AF which I think is a good thing that sounds like a bad thing. Chris Paddack could get a win in Arlington. Big night for Paddack mentions btw! He’s got some real cherry matchups coming up and the best pitchers home park in MLB so despite how hard he’s getting hit it might not matter over the next few weeks.

Joc Pederson – 1-for-4, 2 runs, HR (7), RBI. Roc and Joc! Someone call Dan Cortes! This was barely over but it still counts! How about those CityConnects? Yeah I love them but they barely count. Can we get like a cowboy theme, maybe? There’s so many exciting ways you could go with this versus just Tejas in red. Oh, Joc’s got a 1.000-plus OPS when he leads off. Maybe keep doing that, Mr. Manager?

Brandon Nimmo – 1-for-4, HR (7), 2 RBI with a 128 OPS+. Obviously the Rangers are gonna win big on Nolan Ryan bloody jersey night. Is this one of the best promos ever? Meanwhile the Mets had Bobby Valentine disguise night, and he threw out the first pitch fully incognito. Mets front office would need a disguise if they ended up losing this game. But they didn’t! Is Bobby V the new grimace!? Probably!

Abner Uribe – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, BB, K, 3rd win. Abner heard Braves fans give the chop and misinterpreted that to be crotch chop. Abner entered in a tie game while Trevor Megill got the save opp (1.0 IP, 2 K, SV (7)). While this isn’t 100% telling that the roles have shifted, Mr. Manager Murphy is old school which is the exact establishment D-Generation X is rallying against. And if you don’t like it, Uribe’s got five words for ya! Brewers are a wagon, y’all!

Cam Smith – 2-for-4, HR (6), 2 RBI. He’s getting hot again! Tanked it and still going. I was more impressed with this absolute lunch money robbery two days ago. Can you imagine trading this guy for two months of Kyle Tucker?

Logan Webb – 4.1 IP, 3 hits, ER, 3 BB, 5 K. He’s back to save the Giants season. We need Spider-Noir on the case to figure out what went so wrong with this roster construction.

Caleb Kilian – 0.2 IP, 5 hits, 5 ER, 2 HR. I’d start here, Nick Cage. This is the type of performance that will ruin your ratios for weeks. Much like Killian Murphy, this was an atom bomb. Believe it or not this was just Caleb’s first blown save of the year. So maybe he gets another shot, that would seem to be a very Mr. Manager thing to do.

Hunter Goodman – 2-for-4, 3 runs, HR (12), 3 RBI. Hunter is a Good man! Not a walk off but the tying bomb is also nice.

Ezequiel Tovar – 2-for-4, 3 runs, 2 HR (4), 4 RBI, SB (4). Double the slam with a side of legs! His third homer this week! You think I was gonna let you go one whole blurb without another walk off? Tovar wakes up for a game to cap off a five run ninth for the Rox. It was that kind of night.

Shohei Ohtani – 3-for-4, HR (10). Freddie Freeman (8), Max Muncy (13) and Will Smith (6) also homered. The whole gang! Guess they’re be okay for a bit without Teoscar? Let me single out Muncy and his .873 OPS, who if not for another power hitter on the team having a 0.82 ERA, might be the MVP of this Dodgers squad to date. The other guy is okay too.

Justin Wrobleski – 7.0 IP, 1 hit, ER, 9 K, 7th win. Would you rather be lucky or good? The better question is would you rather be good or pitch for the Dodgers.

Zack Wheeler – 6.0 IP, 5 hits, 4 ER, BB, 4 K, 1st L, ERA at 2.27. If you drafted Rodon, Cole and Wheeler and streamed for the first month you’d be in pretty good shape right now!

Kyle Schwarber – 1-for-4, HR (22). He’s on pace for 60 homers and 110 RBI. I don’t know about you–but I’m feeling twenty-two!

Carlos Rodon – 6.0 IP, 4 hits, ER, 2 BB, 3 K, 1st win. No bad for a little league ballpark.

Ben Rice – 3-for-5, HR (17), 2 RBI, 1.037 OPS. For those who like prop bets, Benjamin barreling one at Bing Bong was about as easy money as it gets.

Nick Kurtz – 1-for-4, HR (9). Bow and a Kurtzy! People laughed at me when I drafted Nick Kurtz 10th overall, but I am the one who is cackling now! Mwahahaha!

Randy Arozarena – 2-for-5, RBI. Not a walk off home run but still a walk off! The league was wild’n last night. This post took me six hours to write. I shouldn’t have taken all that codeine first.

George Kirby – 5.1 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, BB 4 K. Call me crazy but I’m buying. All the Mariners starters, even the shitty ones. Yes, him too. Castillo? Sure even him!

Julio Rodriguez – 3-for-5, HR (11), 2 RBI. Juul-rod rips the fattest vapes I ever did see! That’s back-to-back games with bombs, and now homered in three of his last five. For all the hullabaloo about J-Rod’s slow start, he’s more or less in the exact place he was statistically last May at this time. Although he has hit nine in May. Like I said, buy all the M’s! Especially this one!

J.P. Crawford – 2-for-4, 4 runs, 2 HR (9), 3 RBI. Well, we’re not going to let J-rod have all the fun! Like his partner in crime Just Playing Crawford has seven homers in May alone with three homers in the past week along with a five game hitting streak. He also leads off if you’re in a league that counts runs which is pretty much all of them. Yes, he’s worth the add!

Troy Melton – 7.0 IP, 6 hits, ER, BB, K. The Big Tuna Melton’s stuff wasn’t particularly strong on Friday but it didn’t really matter. He got just six whiffs, three on his slider, lots of soft contact, but we’ll take it! The strikeouts were obviously underwhelming but it’s just his second start back and the Rays matchup is scary but he’s still an add everywhere for me until he gives me a reason not to.

Kyle Finnegan – 1.0 IP, 2 hits, ER, BS (4) and Will Vest – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, K, Hold. Is there like a rule about transitioning the closer role in the interim that it can just never be seamless. Finnegan was a BUY and one of the best closers in all of baseball last year, but asking him to be the closer on one day’s notice? Get outta town! That kind of thing takes weeks of prep! I think Finnegan gets another shot at the gig but it’s probably gonna be messy.

Dillon Dingler – 1-for-4, HR (11), 2 RBI, slashing .231/.319/.468. Dillon Dingler ding dong dinger!

Sam Antonacci – 2-for-5, SB (8). I don’t understand why there isn’t as much hype for Sammy Antonacci? If he was on team Italy he’d be 100% owned right now. Not for nothing! He (usually) leads off, he’s got a five game hitting streaking and three steals in the past week! But do you notice? Ahh, fuggedaboutit!

Munetaka Murakami – 0-for-2, left the game with a hamstring strain. Nooo! Makes me wanna howl at the Mune! Goodnight Mune. *tear* This is a crushing blow for a White Sox team that was trending way up, but fingies crossed it will only be a few weeks absence. 

Miguel Vargas – 2-for-5, HR (13), 3 RBI, slashing .235/.365/.485. Walk off 2-run home run. I got goosies, y’all! This was the night of walk-offs if you haven’t caught on by now. Five separate walk offs wins and four walk-off home runs to symbolically kick off a summer of baseball, but Vargas’ takes the viral dot cake. After losing their leader, their muse, their samurai, their precious Mune! South Side stood up and Miguel Vargas delivered the 2-run blast to win it. In the CityConnect’s no less. It’s all very poetic. Even more so since the Cubs are so pathetic now. Even more more so if I hadn’t added Finnegan hours earlier. We might have to wait on the wagon until Mune returns but the White Sox are without a doubt the most fun team in the league.

Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!