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Luis Castillo, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

January 3, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 126 Comments

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In a post last year titled, Good Luck Storming The Castillo In 2018 Drafts, I wrote, “Watching Luis Castillo is officially an ASMR trigger.  *insert onomatopoeia of satisfied exhale, picks up invisible fork and knife, mimes cutting up satisfied exhale, eats exhale*  Do you see how Castillo’s got me?  I’m eating satisfied exhales.  Can I write the 2018 fantasy baseball sleeper post right now for Luis Castillo?  TFW you see Castillo:  Insert Oprah’s o face around Gayle King.  CASTILLO MAKING ME CRAZY!  And not eating sugar for six days isn’t helping.  This Whole30 Diet got me like:  insert crazy-googly eyes.  I got Biggie Smalls eyes right now.  *smacks face*  Be coherent, Grey!  Sorry, about that.  Luis Castillo’s surface perfs:  9.9 K/9, 3.2 BB/9, 3.40 xFIP, averages 98 MPH, and now I’m lightheaded again.  Okay, need to save something for his 2018 sleeper post.”  And that’s me quoting me!  So, guess what this is?  The Luis Castillo sleeper post.  Frank Voila!  Am I little concerned he’s not really a sleeper anymore?  Yeah, he’s being drafted a little high.  He might only be a sleeper, if everyone in your league is actually asleep.  So, what can we expect from Luis Castillo for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Michael Wacha, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

January 1, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 85 Comments

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I’ve been focusing a lot on hitters so far with my 2018 fantasy baseball sleepers (clickbait).  This is not by design.  Hanging in my kitchen, an Elvis clock that keeps time by swiveling its hips and a poster of a cat making sushi, so I can call that room my “kitsch-en,” that’s by design.  We need to find cheap pitchers who will return a better ROI just as much as cheap hitters.  By the way, ROI is the douchiest thing I’ve ever written on Razzball, and I tried to make “Potatoes to chips” a thing for five years.  Though, potatoes to chips, I kinda want to own Michael Wacha in every league.  You can look at his 12-9 record with a 4.13 ERA and balk, but Steve Carlton had a shizzton of balks, so is this a bad thing?  Not to answer, but to ruminate while sipping a pamplemousse La Croix.  This isn’t even about the Cardinals making explosive players out of duds, i.e., making dynamite out of nitric acid and a manifesto.  There’s one word females aren’t trying to gender neutralize, huh?  You don’t hear anyone complaining it’s not personifesto or even womanifesto.  Sure, leave us white men with the crap words!  Now, that I’ve mansplained manifesto… What can we expect from Michael Wacha for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Ben Gamel, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 29, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 58 Comments

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Over in the Paul DeJong sleeper, I went over different types of sleepers.  There was the the sleeper who– Actually, just go there and read the categories I laid out like your mother lays out your clothes.  Are you back?  Good.  Okay, Ben Gamel doesn’t fit into any of those categories.  He’s in the category of “Who the eff is Ben Gamel?”  Just on the Mariners alone, I could say Ryon Healy is a sleeper, and some people might agree.  Mitch Haniger has been a sleeper for about three years.  Maybe some would even consider Mike Zunino a sleeper.  Ben Gamel though?  He’s not going to be drafted even in deep mixed leagues.  He’s a sleeper who fantasy baseball ‘perts won’t even talk about, but if you mention him they’ll be like, “Oh, yeah, he’s a good sleeper.”  So, why not talk about him?  “Because no one is going to talk about him.”  That’s right, most fantasy baseball ‘perts judge their sleepers on how much they are not sleepers.  Why is this?  Not sure, ask them.  Ben Gamel is around that of a $2 play in AL-Only leagues.  He’s the Rip Van Winkle of sleepers.  He’s such a sleeper I guarantee you there will be people asking me in the comments as late as June if they should pick him up.  He’s the kind of guy that can win super deep leagues with a very late round pick.  If you only play in shallower mixed leagues, go check out my Paul DeJong sleeper.  If you want a deep league flyer… So, what can we expect from Ben Gamel for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Manuel Margot, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 28, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 47 Comments

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Last year, Manuel Margot hit 16 homers and stole 21 bags, while hitting .263.  *you checking Manuel Margot player page, you furrowing your brow*  A 23-year-old with 16 homers and 21 steals while not killing you in average and being drafted after 200 overall?  Huh?  *you tentatively raising your hand*  You, “Um, Grey.”  Not right now, I’m making a point.  Is he being artificially deflated by the association with the Padres? Knowing the Padres, he’ll be traded to the Cubs for Andrew Cashner.  *you holding your elbow as your arm gets tired from being raised*  “Grey, can I just say one thing?”  What, you?  Smugly, “He only hit 13 homers and stole 17 bases.”  That’s right, in only 126 games, I was prorating his numbers over the course of the season, so eat a D, Smug You.   This was also his rookie year.  What, no player has ever gotten better after their rookie year?  Maybe not Cody Bellinger or Aaron Judge or Ben Grieve, but most do get better after their rookie year.  So, what can we expect from Manuel Margot for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Nick Castellanos, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 26, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 75 Comments

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Hahahahahahahaha–Breathe, Grey, breathe!  Nick Castellanos?!  As a sleeper?!  Again?!  Well, it must be fantasy baseball sleeper season with a post about Nick Castellanos.  I debated on whether or not to write this post (for 17 seconds), but I kinda have to write a sleeper post about Nick Castellanos now because if he really does breakout in a huge way this year, I can’t have this offseason be the one year he doesn’t have a sleeper post.  That wouldn’t make any sense.  Kinda like every episode of Mr. Robot.  Elliot is doing what now?  I have no idea, and I watch the episodes and read the recaps.  I nearly talked myself out of this sleeper post, too.  Not because I’ve written the same one four years counting, though that would’ve been a good reason.  I almost didn’t write it because his power was so lucky last year.  He nearly led the league with ‘Lucky’ homers (4) and was fifth in the league for ‘Just Enough’ homers (12).  16 homers out of his 26 homers that could’ve easily been doubles (one, actually, could’ve been an out because it was a misplayed inside-the-park-homer).  Who’s Greek and might only hit 10 homers next year?  Nick Markakis, the Greek God of the Bloop Single, but if there’s room for one more, Nick Castellanos, the Greek God of Hard Contact, seems like a worthy bedfellow.  Though, there’s the thing:  Hard Contact.  So, what can we expect from Nick Castellanos for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Position Eligibility for 2018 Fantasy Baseball

December 22, 2017 | 2018 Fantasy Baseball Draft, Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 125 Comments

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On Dancer!  On Prancer!  On–Oh, I didn’t hear you come in.  Welcome, reader!  Grab some egg nog and brandy it up to the fire.  You look festive.  I love that Rudolph tongue ring.  That’s the great thing about Christmas, no matter what your interpretation is, it’s all about commercialism.  That’s unless you light the Munenori Kawasaki. The 2018 fantasy baseball rankings are not far away.  Right now, January Grey is throwing darts at a board to figure out where to rank Shohei Ohtani, the hitter vs. Shohei Ohtani, the pitcher.  Exciting!   In the meantime, let’s look at the players who have multiple position eligibility for this upcoming 2018 fantasy baseball season.  The biggest surprise from this list is one that we’ve discussed previously.  I’m going to try to stay in the holiday spirit, but Anthony Rizzo having 2nd base eligibility because they switched his glove out ten times is really effin’ stupid.  So, if Mike Trout plays the outfield with a catcher’s mitt, he’s a catcher?  Oh.  *runs a marathon in just under nine hours*  Kay.   Any hoo!  I did this list of multi-position eligible players because I figured it would help for your 2018 fantasy baseball drafts.  I’m a giver, snitches!  Happy Holidays!  I only listed players that have multiple position eligibility of five games or more started outside of their primary position.  Not four games at a position, not three, definitely not two.  Five games started.  If they played eight games somewhere but only started one, they are not listed.  5, the Road Runner of numbers.  So this should cover Yahoo, ESPN, CBS, et al (not the Israeli airline).  Yes, Christmas came three days early this year.  Players with multiple position eligibility are listed once alphabetically under their primary position.  This is the only time a year I do anything alphabetically, so I might’ve confused some letters.  Is G or H first?  Who knows, and, better yet, who cares!  Wow, someone’s got the Grinchies, must be the spiked egg nog talking.  A very special thank you to VinWins, who helped me put this list together.  Anyway, here’s all the players with multiple position eligibility for the 2018 fantasy baseball season and the positions they are eligible at:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Giants Like Investing In Veterans As The Day Is Longoria

December 21, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 76 Comments

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The Giants went out and traded for the 32-year-old Evan Longoria, who has rapidly been declining for years.  Please, keep that in mind while I run down their lineup.  Hitting leadoff…Steven Duggar?  Is that the Christian with 52 kids who is cheating on his wife with his butler or some shizz?  Maybe, it’s definitely not Christian Arroyo, he was traded.  Hitting 2nd…Joe Panik?  We’re only two guys in, but Panik, indeed.  Then will come their newly-minted three-hole hitter, Longoria, followed by the 14-homer, don’t-touch-his-pretty-boy-face, Buster Posey.  Please never let me see another one of those commercials with Posey in it.  Please.  Next up!  A guy whose hits are described as “belting one” because his last name is Belt, and for no other reason.  It is completely and unequivocally not because he hits the ball hard.  Followed by…Is it a bird?  Is it a plane?  Is it my 72-year-old aunt trying to throw a baseball?  No, it’s The Gangly Manbird, Hunter Pence.  Next up, some combination of Brandon Crawford, Jarrett Parker and let’s hope Madison Bumgarner knocks in a runner otherwise they’re going to lose 95 games.  As my intern, let’s call him, Lalph Rifshitz would say, that’s primo, bud.  As for Longoria, he should feel at home with the Giants since he is used to being in places that collect old people.  On the bright side, Longoria plays a lot, staying on the field.  On the dim side, you kinda wish he’d take more days off.  For 2018, I’ll give Longoria the projections of 86/22/94/.271/2 in 608 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Nomar Mazara, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 20, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 59 Comments

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I know what you’re thinking, haven’t we already called Nomar Mazara a sleeper?  So?  We can’t ever call a guy a sleeper again after calling him one?  I know, this is so logical it’s absolutely nuts.  Crazy Town, population: My Stache.  “I think you should get into government.”  “Why?”  “Because you’re the only one living in Crazy Town, and you can shore up the vote pretty easily.”  That’s some local townspeople and My Stache discussing My Stache getting into government.  Nomar Mazara is so forgotten he’s behind this blank space              and you need one of those special highlighters to rub over the space to reveal his name.  Mezuzah was hung at the door of “Breakout” two years ago and has been collecting dust ever since.  Last year, in his attempt to deflate any optimism about his career, he hit 20 HRs, stole 2 bags and .253.  Hit the snooze alarm, I’m getting drowsy.  “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the most boring player?”  “Hmm, does that say Ramon or Nomar?  It’s hard to read in a mirror.”  So, what can we expect from Nomar Mazara for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Phillies Pay Up To Get Back That Carlos They Traded To Clev…Nope, It’s Santana

December 18, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 110 Comments

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Carlos Santana was signed by the Phils.  Did Carlos Santana ever have a song called, “Harumph?”  Cause he’s making me harumph all over the place.  Doesn’t Hoskins play 1B?  Will Santana move to 3rd?  I agree, Maikel hasn’t been great, but he’s too young to give up on.  Maybe Santana plays outfield?  Hoskins plays outfield?  Maybe they juggle left field?  Maybe they juggle balls hit to them in left field?  Maybe they’re juggalos?  I got questions, y’all!  The scenario of Hoskins in the outfield seems most likely with Franco getting pushed down the order, but not out of the lineup entirely.  This might be something to watch in the spring with The Jacked Up Jew, and how he manages his new Latin classic rock guitarist.  As for Santana, his stats last year look like that of an aging slugger.  Carlos Santana’s gone from Oye Como Va to a hard-of-hearing Latino, ‘Oye come again?’  His average home run distance from 2016 to 2017 came down ten feet, but Citizens Flank might help a little.  His line drive rate went up, but his fly balls are going nowhere, and his Hard Contact was down.  He’s even seeing more pitches inside the zone, because people just aren’t scared of him anymore.  His stats don’t scream, ‘The end is nigh,’ but they are whispering, ‘Soon, my pretty.’  For 2018, I’ll give Carlos Santana projections of 74/24/81/.257/4 in 552 ABs.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Trey Mancini, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 15, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 115 Comments

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Last year at this time, if you would’ve asked me about Trey Mancini, I would’ve told you he was a great lounge singer in the Pacific Northwest who wore the winter fragrance, Eskimo’s Breath made with real Rumplemintz.  Now, brucely, I’m shocked I’m writing this post.  I figured he’d be priced correctly in 2018 drafts, and no longer a sleeper.  Two players’ stats for last year: 65/24/78/.293/1 and 94/10/62/.273/15.  The runs are nice for the 2nd player, but we know runs and RBIs are more about ABs, lineup placement and team offense around said player.  15 steals are decent, but 10 homers are terrible in the Era of the Super Ball, and a .273 average is serious bleh.  Which two players is that?  Well, you know one is Trey Mancini.  Any guesses who the 2nd player is?  I hear someone say Cesar Hernandez.  Solid guess, but not right.  Any one else?  I hear someone say a 15th century Martin Prado.  That’s way off.  Okay, someone just guessed “Your mother,” which is just rude.  The 2nd player is Xander Bogaerts.  Different position than Mancini, obviously, but also being drafted about sixty spots before Mancini.  So, what can we expect from Trey Mancini for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Ozuna In Cards As Marlins Fold

December 14, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 88 Comments

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Marcell Ozuna was traded to the Cards, because the Marlins only had him under control until the end of 2019, and the Marlins are playing for 2022.  Then, in 2023, the Marlins will be playing for 2042.  Seriously, what the eff are the Marlins doing?  I understand trying to get younger, but they’re trading guys who are young.  It’s not like they’re moving Martin Prado.  Maybe having a guy who discarded women when they reached the age of 22 isn’t the best idea to run a club.  Jeter continues to view 27-year-olds as ancient.  Hey, Jeter, you’re not unloading Minka Kelly here, you’re unloading Jessica Biel.  With the extra Wild Card, I’ll never understand slashing an entire team.  Before the selling spree, the Marlins were literally two players away from a Wild Card berth.  Now, they’re five years away.  Madness, man, madness.  Any hoo!  Marcell Ozuna averaged 413 feet on his home runs last year, because OZUNA strong.  If you overlay his home runs last year with his new park, he keeps his 37 homers and gains an extra one.  It’s more or less a push in the Busch.  OZUNA love Busch, it is OZUNA favorite type of hedge, much better hedge than saying someone will be president next year without saying a name.  For 2018, I’ll give Ozuna the projections of 101/35/106/.278/1 in 607 ABs.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Eddie Rosario, 2018 Fantasy Baseball Sleeper

December 13, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Sleepers | 90 Comments

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Eddie Rosario hit 27 homers and stole nine bags last year.  This should disqualify him from being a sleeper.  You might be thinking.  “Sure, uh-huh, but what was his average?”  He hit .290.  So, now you might be thinking, “Okay, okay, got it, but what was his BABIP?  Was he lucky?”  His BABIP was .312, his career BABIP is .325.  You might now be thinking, “Fine, but the Twins, I mean, blech, right?”  The Twins were the 7th best offense in baseball last year, just ahead of the Diamondbacks, Rangers and Red Sox.  Now, you might be thinking, “Well, Rosario isn’t a big part of that offense.”  He’s their cleanup hitter.  Now, you might be thinking, “His HR/FB must’ve been insane.”  It was 16.4%.  Far from insane.  Now you might be thinking, “He hits a lot of ground balls.  He’s gotta, right?”  About the same as Gary Sanchez and Travis Shaw.  “He strikes out a lot?”  Nope, about the same as Freddie Freeman.  “I feel like he’s been around a while, he’s old, right?”  He’s 26.  “So, why is he a sleeper?”  Better yet… So, what should we expect from Eddie Rosario for 2018 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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