Scooter Looking Razor Sharp

Cincinnati Reds second baseman Scooter Gennett homered in his fourth straight game Friday night going 4-for-5 with his 6th homer and 3 RBI. After a slow start to the season power-wise, Gennett has been slicker than a Motorola cell phone hitting .458 in the past week with 6 runs, 4 home runs and 10 RBI. Holy Vespa! Even more shocking, this is the second Reds 2B/SS I’ve profiled this year. I must be infatuated with the Reds infield. Which is kind of sad, because there are so many better infields to be infatuated with. But nope. It’s the Reds. Scooter had a career best year in 2017, hitting .295 with 27 homers, 80 runs scored and 97 RBI. If we look at the advanced stats (nerd!), sure that 20.8% HR/FB rate from last year might be a tad tough to match again, but the .339 BABIP in 2017 is not that far off from his career .329 average. In other words, 2017 was no fluke! In 2018, the .364 BABIP may be a bit inflated again, but he’s also striking out less, 18.5% versus 22.9% in 2017.  So what does all this mean to all of us who aren’t mathematicians or data scientists? Speak english, doc! That average might go down but the power is legit, and Scooter is hotter than a Childish Gambino “This is America” video shot by shot breakdown think piece. Did you even notice the dancing symbolizes the fact that the new song is flames, and is distracting you aka SOCIETY from what’s really going on the in background–POLITICS. Don’t let Gennett’s slow start, or inflated sabremetrics or terrible team distract you, he’s the hottest thing on two wheels right now and worth riding where he’s available.

Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:

Luke Maile – 3-for-4, 2 HR (2), 4 RBI.  His midichlorians are off the charts, master! That’s how you use the force, Luke. Maile hit an RBI single in the 2nd, homered off Chris Sale in the 7th, then hit a walk off homer in the 12th. The Maile man delivers! He’s the back up catcher, ya’ll!  Just goes to show your how deep this Jays team really is, I guess. Cough. He’s slashing .339/.418/.542 through 17 games which has got to lead the Jays or something. Pick him up if you hate yourself?

Chris Sale – 9.0 IP, 6 hits, 3 ER, 15 K. The 15 Ks matched a career high. Blame it on fast ball speed, babeee! SALE! Probably the first time in franchise history a pitcher had 15 strikeouts and lost. Possibly related news, Chris has cancelled the team’s Sunday Fortnite LAN party. David Price already wasn’t invited–he might hurt himself.

Xander Bogaerts – 1-for-4, HR (4). Awesome X!

Odubel Herrera – 2-for-3, HR (6). Is Odubel a superstar!? He leads the league in BA, playing in the PA, running from the DA! He’s also hitting .500 in the past week with 3 homers and 10 RBI. O-Her? Don’t mind if I do!

Michael Conforto – 2-for-3, 2-run HR (3). Michael Conforto used to be the hipsters’ favorite player–but then he blew up. He shed the horn rimmed glasses and waxed mustache. All his home runs were no-longer fair trade organic and he “didn’t love” the new Wes Anderson movie. Smh. Fans were hurt. He was too popular now for hipsters to continue enjoying ironically. But he’s had such brutal start to 2018 everyone is over Michael Conforto. They can’t even, you guys. But now he’s got two homers and five hits in four days and  creeping back into counter culture. That’s right, now that he’s not cool anymore it’s time to like him again before everyone else comes back around. Because now you’re liking something that was cool but isn’t cool anymore but soon could be cool again. And there’s nothing cooler than that!

Devin Mesoraco – 1-for-4, HR (2). BUY. A catcher buy? Must be your lucky day! His first hit/homer as a Met. He’s A number one! Top of the heap! King of the hiiiilllllll, A number oooonnne! New Yoooooooooork!

Steven Matz – 5.0 IP, 5 hits, ER, 4 BB, 3 K. I’ve owned Mr. Matz all year and while he’s been severely underwhelming, he has yes to really hurt me and that is something I appreciate. Maybe if he pitched more than five innings I might actually see a decision.

J.T. Realmuto – 3-for-5, HR (5), 2 RBI. Hey now, another catcher! What kind of sorcery is this? This one is slashing .325/.395/.558 with five homers through 20 games, and is probably better than your catcher. Yes, even that one. En espanol, I assume muto means deal because J.T. is clearly the real deal.

Ozzie Albies – 1-for-4, 2 runs, HR (12), SB (5). Ozzie Man Does! He’s a top 10 fantasy player, folks! I want to own that. You want to own that. Kanye says owning that is a choice. When you make Ronald Acuna look bad. That’s Albies. In Atlanta, Ozzie likes his slam and eggs with fresh Georgia peaches, served to him by a dawlin’ Southern belle with a drawl in her accent thicker than molasses. I reckon, Ozzie’s been hotter than a hooker in church, I do declare.

Miguel Rojas – 3-for-4, run, RBI. He was an underwhelming BUY! I must…stay awake…so I can tell you why you should…buy this boring middle infielder….resist–so tiiired. Oh boy is it sleepy in here. Must be the ambien. Or the whiskey. Or the combination of ambien and whiskey and benadryl. Zzz. Hitting .360 in the past week with a homer and a yawwwwn.

Kevin Gausman – 7.1 IP, 11 hits, 2 ER, 0 BB, 6 K, 3rd win. I don’t know how or why I own you but it happened and it hasn’t been all that bad. Gaus has been one of my most reliable starters. I might even start him next week in Boston! I don’t give a WHIP!

Jacob Faria – 6.0 IP, 8 hits, 7 ER, BB, 3 K. Welp. Coming off two stellar starts where he gave up just one run and six hits in 13.1 IP, it looked like Faria had a cushy match up in Baltimore. Here I was worried about starting Gausman against the hot hitting Rays, but even your grandmoms knows the Orioles have to be one of the weakest teams in the leagues, right? How did this happen? Who is even scoring all these runs for Baltimore?

Manny Machado – 2-for-4, 2 HR (12), 6 RBI. Oh right. Never mind.

Mark Trumbo – 1-for-4, HR (1). *uplifting trombone sound* He’s slashing .325/.341/.475 since his return from the DL and here comes the power. Yeah, I’d own dat!

Carlos Gomez – 2-for-4, run, 2 RBI. CarGo is batting .205 on the year but has a tendency to get crazy hot for stretches. It’s important we recognize these stretches when they begin so we can own him when appropriate. Now might be one of those times–but not 100% sure. I’ll let you know by next week, unfortunately, it might be over it by then, at least by then we’ll know what’s happening in Westworld. Stay tuned!

Willson Contreras – 4-for-5, 2 HR (3), 7 RBI. Two homers on his own bobblehead day no less! That’s how you sell that novelty merch, Willy! Those bobbleheads are prob worth twice as much now! How do you double free? I can actually afford. I got a player lawn gnome at a game two weeks ago and it’s the dumbest thing I think I’ve ever gotten at a game. Naturally, I need more so I can display them in the “garden” that I definitely have. Collect them all!

Kris Bryant – 2-for-3, 3 runs, HR (7), 2 RBI. THE POWER OF KRIS COMPELS ME! THE POWER OF KRIS COMPELS ME!

Starling Marte – 3-for-5, 2 runs, HR (6), 2 RBI. He’s got a six game hitting streak hitting .409 in the past week with a homer and a steal. Oh Starling! Please believe me. I’d never bench you, again. Marte was one of those guys that fell to me in the draft and using Razzball’s rankings I just HAD to take him. Ty bbe.

Max Moroff – 2-for-5, HR (2), 3 RBI. More of games like this, Max!

Jameson Taillon – 3.0 IP, 1 hit, BB, 5 K. Left the game with a laceration in his finger. Shouldn’t miss his next start, but advised by doctor not to shred metal on his axe for at least a week. Bummer!

Alen Hanson – 1-for-3, SB (3). He was a BUY! Here’s what I said about Hanson last week, “if you’re serious about Hanson’s music you have to go beyond their debut album “Middle of Nowhere” to see..” oh, looks like I never finished that thought. Ahem, well especially prevalent in their later stuff, when Taylor began to grow into his vocals I think the band starts to take compelling artistic direction and really begins to ironically, find their voice. Compare 2017’s “I was Born” with some of 2000’s “This Time Around,” the growth is remarkable. So um, Alen Hanson, yeah, dude is hotter than a Greatest Hits album by our favorite trio. Two homers and a steal in the past week. Might be someone you can Mmmmdrop to make room for Hanson?

Jed Lowrie – 3-for-6, HR (9), 2 RBI. Two of the Matts also homered as the A’s scored 10 runs on 14 hits. Let me tell you  a lil’ story about a many named Jed. He’s slashing 344/.404/.596 with nine homers! That’s it, that’s the whole story! I told you it was lil’.

Sonny Gray – 5.0 IP, 9 hits, 5 ER, 3 BB, 2 K. Not-so-sunny days. When your star pitcher in your keeper league gets traded to the Yankees and it ruins his value forever and you just don’t know if you can do this any more.

Gleyber Torres – 1-for-3, HR (3). Aaron Judge also hit his tenth homer with 4 RBIs. New York may have lost but Gleyber hit a homer so if I’m a Yankee fan I’m happy. For the record, I am not a Yankee fan and I am rarely, if ever, happy.

Trevor Bauer – 4.2 IP, 11 hits, 4 ER, 2 BB, 3 K. That’s more like it. These are the starts we were used to getting from Bauer. But then again, they also used to come with 7-9 strikeouts. This is unacceptable, Trevor.

Michael Brantley – 2-for-5, Grand Slam HR (4). He hit his first grand salami in ever last week now he has two in 10 days. Wild, wild stuff. He’s batting .327/.362/.542 with four jacks and a steal and needs to be owned before he gets injured again.

Jose Ramirez – 2-for-5, HR (11). He’s got 4 homers, 3 steals and 12 RBI in the past two weeks. Jose was able to identify a strong negative engram from a past life and through extensive auditing he has raised himself to a 3.7 on the tonal scale! Shedding the overt he is a conservative with obvious recharged vitality and life. That’s almost clear, people!

Salvador Perez – 1-for-5, HR (5), 2 RBI. The Royals had 15 hits with 10 RBI including 3 hits from Mike Moustakas. Sally’s got 3 homers in his past four games, and is absolutely crushing since he got off the DL. Just keep him away from your suitcase!

Cole Hamels – 6.0 IP, hit, 0 ER, 3 BB, 5 K, 2nd win. If you’re a pitcher named Cole in Texas, more likely than not you’re killing it right now.

Justin Verlander – 6.0 IP, 3 hits, ER, 2 BB, 7 K. I make sure to fit a Verlander blurb into the blog every chance I can, if only to have a reason to google Kate Upton every week.

Rougned Odor – 0-for-3, 2 Ks. Stinks. Should have stayed on the DL.

Matt Koch – 8.0 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, BB, 3 K. Koch has been solid registering quality starts in each of his five games started. Friday’s start was especially impressive against the Nationals strong line up. He’s got a nice 2.43 ERA and a 0.99, but the strikeout numbers aren’t blowing me away and his BABIP suggests a bit of regression is on the way. 4/10 Would still stream.

Max Scherzer – 7.0 IP, 4 hits, ER, 11 K, 7th win. Bold predictions: Max Scherzer will not win the 2018 NL Cy Young.

Trea Turner – 1-for-4, HR (4). Two homers in the past week is nice, Trea, but I drafted you for average and speed, neither of which you’re giving me right now. Is this because me and Bryce went to LaserQuest without you?

Anthony Rendon – 1-for-3, HR (3). Two homers in the past week. He’s back so I guess the Nats offense is good again.

Gerardo Parra – 4-for-5, run, RBI. Rockies scored 10 runs on 16 hits, with Carlos Gonzalez going 2-for-5, HR (4), and the entire Colorado offense going, there’s no place like home.

Travis Shaw – 3-for-6, HR (8), 3 RBI. Milwaukee scored 11 on 17 hits. How do we get air like this in Milwaukee, the Brewers’ wondered? I guess you can start by legalizing marijuana?

Josh Hader – 1.0 IP, 0 hits, 2 K, SV (6). Knebel is no Hader. In fact, Corey is considering drinking that Hader-ade so he can pick up right where Josh has left off.

Luke Weaver – 5.0 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, BB, 4 K, 3rd win. Luke finally pulled out the ol’ astral projection Jedi technique which has never been seen or even mentioned before now, but was borderline unstartable before that. Perhaps this was the confidence boost he needed to leave the island of Ahch-To and finally defeat the empire. Mother of Kwath! all the Star Wars references this week. Can you tell I’m excited for Solo? Even if it’s only to see Lando.

Tommy Pham – 3-for-5, HR (7), 2 RBI. The Pham-slam, thank you ma’am!

Marcell Ozuna – 2-for-4, HR (3). OZUNA stop hitting for power. OZUNA not sure what happen. OZUNA just know he miss Giancarlo very much.

Travis Jankowski – 3-for-5, HR (1). He’s hitting .409 with a steal and homer in the past week. Janky’s slashing .353/.421/.559 and has speed and should create some controversy over which below-average outfielder the Padres should start on a day-to-day basis.

Jedd Gyorko – 3-for-4, HR (4). The Gyorko store called. Home runs are now 20% off this week only!

Tyler Skaggs – 6.0 IP, 6 hits, 2 ER, 2 BB, 7 K. Tyler has been surprisingly solid and his 46/13 K/BB is especially welcome. He’s striking out more, walking less, and giving up fewer home runs. Rumor is he’s been visiting cat cafes with Shohei where they exchange notes on batters, sip lattes and pet kitters. Purrrfect!

Eddie Rosario – 2-for-4, 2 HR (9). Eddy’s hitting .444 with 9 runs, 10 RBI, 4 homers and a steal in the past week! Sweet sassy molassy! If you come by the loft (that’s what I call my 1 BR basement apartment) I will massage your back later. It must be quite sore from carrying my team so hard these past two weeks. No, I don’t mind, as long as you don’t mind if Mookie goes first.

Matt Harvey – 4.0 IP, hit, 0 ER, 0 BB, 2 K. This is like that scene in the Dark Knight Rises where Bruce is training in the pit and finally escapes when he makes the metaphorical jump that’s not all that metaphorical really cause it’s actually a very big jump. Embrace the fear, Harvey. Then go out there and defeat Bane, or uhh, the Dodgers. This was about as good as we could have expected from Harvey in his first start with his new team. Which, I’ll admit, is very sad. But the Dark Knight Rises, people, like rises up, and he in the end defeats Bane and possibly bangs Anne Hathaway, and then becomes umm, Ben Affleck, I think? Regarless, Matt gets San Francisco next week, which is about as cushy a start as you could get. If you’re feeling crrrazy, insane and deranged like the Joker, I could see streaming him there. Watch as he makes your chance of winning ratios…disappear!

Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!