It’s getting ridiculous now, isn’t it? Once sign stealing was quelled, the haters couldn’t wait for the Houston Astros to fall flat on their faces. But this Day of Reckoning never really comes, does it? No matter what front office or rule changes occur, these modern-day Astros just keep on chuggin’. They are a seemingly […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Chris Sale
Please see our player page for Chris Sale to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
We got fantasy starters! *rings a town crier bell* We got the top 60 starters for 2023 fantasy baseball! There’s a “So many starters to draft” theme cutting through the starters rankings, and that theme continues. Also, Razzball Subscriptions are up and running, and that comes with our online Fantasy Baseball War Room. Here’s Steamer’s 2023 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2023 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. All projections included here are mine, and where I see tiers starting and stopping are included. Anyway, here’s the top 60 starters for 2023 fantasy baseball:
NOTE I: All my rankings are currently available on Patreon for the price of a Starbucks coffee, if you get one of those extra grande frappuccino jobbers. Don’t wait for the rankings to come out over the next month, and get them all now.
NOTE II: Free agents are listed as just that and not yet projected. Once a guy signs, I will write out their blurb and add in projections, or remove them, if they sign in an unfavorable place. They are ranked currently where I think they might be if they sign on for a full-time job.
GO BACK TO THE TOP 40 STARTERS FOR 2023 FANTASY BASEBALL
Please, blog, may I have some more?Razzle Dazzlers, welcome once again to your weekly fantasy baseball injury report. The “Ambulance Chasers” article series mostly focuses on matters of the living. It is not called “Hearse Chasers” after all (but that could be an interesting spin-off). However, give me a minute to opine about the Harry Caray hologram at the MLB Field […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Guess what, y’all?! A new Spencer Torkelson dropped! No, he’s nothing like that old Spencer Torkelson! For one, he’s not young! He’s more like a new older Spencer Torkelson! For two, the Tigers are calling up Kerry Carpenter because they have no conceivable reason to keep him down anymore, because of the stats he was putting up in the minors — .316/.384/.653 with 30 home runs and 75 RBIs in 96 games between Double-A Erie and Triple-A Toledo. That’s the Mecca of Ohio. It’s why it’s called Holy Toledo. He was on a recent prospect stash list by Itch, and I say stop stashing and start doing! Comerica Park sucks. More like Crummica! Owned it! But someone making that good of contact with that sorta power is worth a look in deeper mixed leagues. Let’s see if Carpenter can drum up some offense and make the Tigers’ stop feeling like Rainy Days and Mondays. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Greetings, Razzfam! I mostly play a doctor on tv, but occasionally, I stretch a pair of latex gloves down and over my hands, letting them slap with a satisfying pop across my wrists. Open up wide because today is one of those days! When I read that Jhoulys Chacin has a condition formally known as […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?It’s second-half baseball! Nothing more exciting than watching the race for the bottom. [thinks of headline to submit to TMZ] ENYWHEY. Enough about the Athletics. We’ve got one of these great years for the AL Central. The Minnesota Twins would be in 4th place in the AL East, but are somehow atop the leaderboard in the flyover division. The Twins wouldn’t be in first place in any other division in baseball except for our beloved AL Central, home to the Kansas City Royals and Detroit Tigers. Remember when those teams were threats, and Miggy and Beltran and Greinke and Scherzer and Verlander were all just little spuds waiting to be big potatoes? No you don’t remember them because you were born in this century and only stumbled upon my article because some TikTok star made fun of it? Welcome, junior! Let’s win you a fantasy league.
It’s the second half of the MLB season, so much like like our pants after seconds at the 4th of July picnic, we need to adjust.
Please, blog, may I have some more?It took six picks for a college prospect to come off the board at the 2022 MLB Draft in Los Angeles, but a string of eight-consecutive players from the collegiate realm followed — including seven straight position players to cap off the streak. Just like when you’re waiting the better part of an hour for your luggage to appear at baggage claim, then all of a sudden your suitcase, snowboard, pogo stick, camping gear, ninja swords, guitar, mechanical crossbow, and cat all appear on the conveyer belt in a row, one after the other. This has happened to me twice but is incredibly rare. In total, 21 of the 39 players selected in the first round came from the college ranks (including Round 1C and Round CB-A). As always, there’s a lot to unpack with these picks and the subsequent rounds beyond, as 616 total players had their names called across the 20-round, three-day event. I’ll begin by breaking down some of the biggest storylines from the draft and conclude with ranking a handful of sleepers and overhyped players that you should target more or less heavily than their draft position might otherwise indicate. The MLB Draft doesn’t work the same way as it does in many other professional sports leagues. Taking the top player available is quite often not the focus, as bonus pool allocation strategy is frequently at the forefront. Never, ever, ever copy and paste a list of the draftees in order and use that to directly dictate your first-year player draft rankings. Feel free to use it as a frame of reference, then apply your own opinion and the information provided by myself and The Itch to develop your own big board.
Please, blog, may I have some more?As soon as you’re finished with this post, I want you to close your laptop, step outside and look at a bird in flight. Pick up a flower, breathe in its fragrance, sneeze from your allergies, wave to a neighbor and close your robe because you’re not just waving with your hand. How does that feel? Exhilarating? Then your dedication sucks! It should be a total bore. You should be more interested in whether or not I’m going to have a top 100 for the 2nd half of fantasy baseball tomorrow than what your significant other has been doing for the last three and a half months. Luckily, I will have a top 100 tomorrow, and your significant other can keep being your fantasy team. Okay, enough hubbub on the tomfoolery! Chris Sale broke his pinkie yesterday. Well, Aaron Hicks broke it, technically. If not for bad luck, Chris Sale would have no luck. I was minding my own business yesterday, watching the Yankees/Red Sox game when I heard the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life, a pubic hair commercial, then the 2nd thing worst thing was Sale’s pinkie going creeee-ack. Not sure how long this knocks him out, or how long I will be thinking about that pubic hair commercial, but they might be similar timeframes — the rest of the season. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Is it just me (it’s not just me) or do you also think a guy who isn’t great in the majors, then goes to Triple-A and tears it up is a Quad-A player? I can’t help, but think that. It’s almost like I’d prefer a guy struggle a bit in the minors so I can just think of them as bad vs. Quad-A. That label, the Quad-A label, is the kiss of death. Like being on a boat with Robert Wagner or a marriage with OJ. You ain’t getting out of that. That doesn’t mean Akil Baddoo (2-for-4, 1 RBI) is Quad-A. Yabba Dabba Baddoo tore up the minors this year, and was recalled. That can be all that was. He was not as good as he was last year, which is why I told you to avoid him in the preseason, but he’s also not as baddoo as he was this year. How about something in the middle? That would be nice. Can’t be worse than what the Tigers were getting in the outfield. That’s just Grossman. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?The most popular song in the universe right now is Running Up That Hill by art-pop super queen Kate Bush. The most common comment about that song I see on the ‘net is “Hey, have you heard the Placebo cover?” Yeah, I own that on CD. The second most common question: “Would Max from Stranger Things actually be listening to Kate Bush?” See, I thought the big “plan falls apart for the gang” moment would be when Max’s Walkman — truly, the uncredited hero of the series — ran out of batteries for the 98th time, or the cassette unraveled or warped or got put too close to a refrigerator magnet. I didn’t think the final boss interloper would be Alex from Stardew Valley doing Varsity Captain America and, you know, physically stepping on the Walkman.
Please, blog, may I have some more?You ever go into Spencer’s Gifts and ask where the whoopie cushions are then, when shown, say, “No, the ones with the really wet farts?” Ah, I guess we’re built different. I did used to keep myself up at night wondering about the people in Taiwan who would work at the fake vomit factory all day, then go home and tell their loved ones, “No dinner tonight, I lost my appetite.” Just brutally sad. Where’s those peoples’ documentary on Netflix?! Huh?! Any hoo! Spencer Strider (6 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 2.60) is fantastic, and I’m not just talking about his mustache. Well, I am, but it’s more than that. His last three starts: 18 IP, 8 hits, 1 run, 3 walks, 30 Ks and a beautiful mustache! How long do we have to wait until this guy turns into Touki Toussaint?! The truly remarkable thing, his peripherals are even purdier than his surface numbers — 14 K/9, 3.4 BB/9, 2.42 xFIP. He’s got a 2.60 ERA, and he’s being unlucky! Mah gawd, Mr. Man Stache! And they say you have to draft starters early. Sure thing, clean-shaven faces. Whatever you say. Anyway. here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Bryce Harper (1-for-4, 2 runs) and Kyle Schwarber (2-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 17th and 18th homer), stand behind home plate watching Harper’s dad throw batting practice. Schwarber walks out and stops Harp’s dad, “Thanks, but I think I’m gonna use the other guy for the Home Run Derby.” Schwarber points to Patrick Corbin. What’s the opposite of June gloom? Kyle Schwarber’s got that. Kyle Schwarber is the first Phillies hitter with 18 homers in the team’s first 64 games since Domonic Brown in 2013. Shoutout to Tehol! By the by, if you weren’t around last November during the offseason, our writer (?) Tehol was on the Bachelorette. I’m not joking:
One of our Razzball writers is on this season of The Bachelorette — which guy? The one not wearing pants pic.twitter.com/I8COMDuE2z
— Razzball (@Razzball) October 19, 2021
Any hoo! Anyone that can remember Schwarber’s last June knows he loves hitting in June and in Nationals Park. He had 16 homers last June, then burned out almost as quickly. Someone remind me to trade for Schwarber on May 31st and trade him away on July 1st. Yo, Schwarber save some for after the summer solstice. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?