I hate early drafts. ¬†There’s absolutely no skill involved in drafting on March 3rd and avoiding Ian Desmond due to a broken hand that hasn’t happened yet. ¬†It’s like not getting on a subway car and you end up marrying a Cougar vs. Coldplay’s Chris Martin and you keep forgetting your Apple ID so you can’t download a song you really want to hear vs. getting free iPhones hand-delivered by Bono. ¬†Admittedly, I never saw the movie, Sliding Doors, but I picture the plot being something like that. ¬†I want to marry Chris Martin and get iBonos! ¬†Man, this effin’ sucks. ¬†Looks like I’m going to have to battle just a wee bit harder in Yahoo’s Friends & Family draft where I took¬†Desmond. ¬†*cries uncontrollably* ¬†But I don’t want to battle harder! ¬†The tears running down my face have fallen onto my desk and are spelling out, “Why can’t you have anything mice?” ¬†Mice? ¬†What the hell are you talking about tears? ¬†I’ve updated my top 20 overall, top 100 and my top 60 outfielders. ¬† The Fantasy Baseball¬†War Room is updated, and, since Mark Reynolds will be the Rockies’ 1st baseman, I’ve updated the top 20 1st basemen. ¬†Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for fantasy baseball:
Psyche! ¬†Before getting into the post, just wanted to announce JB’s doing a March Madness tourney. ¬†Click it and join and win and have fun and–I’m out of breath, so I’m gonna stop there. ¬†Anyway II, the roundup:
Jason Kipnis¬†– Will miss Opening Day with a rotator cuff injury. ¬†Terry Francona said, “Kipnis is getting better and nothing went haywire.” ¬†Is it me or do managers talk like they’re in the 1940’s? ¬†“All these newfangled buttons on the iPhone! ¬†Just give me a clubhouse phone and Andrew Miller and I’ll be a-okay. ¬†Unless I’m facing dem newfangled Dominican players. ¬†Consarnit! ¬†That Nelson Cruz jumping-jack-frass’d that ball to kingdom come! ¬†Now, someone get me my Pall Malls!” ¬†That’s Jim Leyland after the U.S.-Dominican game this past weekend. ¬†Now Nelson Cruz could live in the Sandals’ Punta Cana resort for the rest of his life without paying any resort fee. ¬†I’m talking free bags of plantain chips! ¬†Any hoo! ¬†I lowered Kipnis in my top 20 2nd basemen for 2017 fantasy baseball¬†and my top 100 for 2017 fantasy baseball, my top 500 (clickbait, snitches!) and I’d be wary about drafting him.
Devon Travis –¬†Dealing with issues from his arthroscopic surgery on his knee. ¬†A’la Henny Youngman, Travis¬†said, “I want to take a knee…just not the one I have.” ¬†I haven’t moved Travis in my rankings, but this news obviously doesn’t instill me with a ton of confidence.
Anthony DeSclafani – Feeling renewed soreness in his elbow which is the precursor for, “Would you like me to bring the catsup? ¬†What? ¬†Yes, I used to play major league baseball. ¬†Oh, crap, is that you Zack Cozart?” ¬†I’ve updated my top 100 starters and pitchers’ pairing draft tool.
Michael Conforto – ¬†Bonus content! ¬†I wrote a Conforto sleeper post back in December, but then Conforto¬†seemed headed to the minors to start this year, so I never posted it. ¬†Now it appears like he will break camp with the club, so here’s what I had written, “Stop being so hard on your players, Mets fans. ¬†So, Michael Conforto hit .100 for, like, three months. ¬†You can‚Äôt blame him for that. ¬†It‚Äôs the Curse of the Mets Can‚Äôt Have Anything Nice. ¬†Until there‚Äôs a 30-for-30 about the Curse of the Mets Can‚Äôt Have Anything Nice, you won‚Äôt believe me, I know. ¬†It‚Äôs real though. ¬†In 1987, Lenny Dykstra was on a three-day bender, he¬†DUI‚Äôd into three trees in three days. ¬†On the¬†third bender, as he stumbled away from his one-day-old Mercedes, he unknowingly walked under a ladder where two construction walkers were discussing the supernatural occult movie, Angel Heart. ¬†Seismically nothing more needed to happen, they were cursed. ¬†Or maybe you can blame Conforto since he‚Äôs total garbage vs. lefties. ¬†How’s ever, Grandy, Asdrubal, Jose Reyes, David Wright, Jay Bruce, d‚ÄôArnaud and Neil Walker. ¬†How‚Äôs that sound? ¬†Like a solid 2010 team? ¬†Does Conforto have a chance to crack that top seven? ¬†If he can‚Äôt, he doesn‚Äôt deserve to be in the major leagues, which, if recent memory serves, he didn‚Äôt last year. ¬†Okay, onto positives. ¬†If he qualified last year, he would‚Äôve had the 14th best Hard Contact rate about the same as Kris Bryant. ¬†For those not in the know, it‚Äôs hard to find a weak sista in the Hard Contact Rate top 15. ¬†Some hit everything hard or hit nothing, such as Chris Carter. ¬†If Conforto gets back to his solid plate discipline he displayed prior to last year, all or nothing shouldn‚Äôt be an issue for Conforto. ¬†He‚Äôs more of a .270 hitter than the .220 he hit last year. ¬†The splits do have me a bit worried, but if he sits vs. 100% of tough lefties and faces another 50% of weak lefties, I‚Äôd take the 75 AB deduction assuming it leaves him with a bump in average. ¬†To double back to Hard Contact, he‚Äôd have the lowest BABIP aside from Bautista and Carter in the top 15, and only¬†fourth¬†lowest in the top 40. ¬†Pure logic tells us if you hit the ball hard, you should not have a low BABIP. ¬†A higher BABIP and he doesn‚Äôt hit .220 again. ¬†Conforto also had the lowest line drive rate in that top 15, tied with Bautista. ¬†Somewhere along the line, Conforto‚Äôs main objective, to pound line drives back up the middle, got away from him. ¬†He‚Äôs young, shizz J.A. Happens. ¬†Can‚Äôt write off Conforto because of one lousy slump. ¬†Or Can‚Äôtforto, if you like. ¬†By May, Conforto could¬†be the Mets‚Äô three-hole hitter.” ¬†And that’s me quoting me that you never read before! ¬†I still don’t see the everyday at-bats, but he should be ranked and projected in my top 500. ¬†For 2017, I‚Äôll gave him¬†the projections of¬†51/18/58/.261/3 in 412 ABs and added him in my top 100 outfielders.
Pedro Alvarez – Signed a deal with the Orioles. ¬†Just about the worst place for Alvarez. ¬†One thing the Orioles don’t need is another station-to-station, three-run homer guy. ¬†Somewhere, The Ghost of Earl Weaver is smiling, though that might be because an umpire ghost just stepped in front of a ghost bus. ¬†I haven’t moved Alvarez in my top 5 DHs but that’s because they’re all kinda garbage from Alvarez down.
David Price – Threw in a cage and has full range of motion in his elbow, i.e., he’s still not someone I’d draft but he can now start the wave.
Scott Kazmir – Won’t pitch in a game for a week. ¬†His mechanics are a mess, he’s injured and he’s behind schedule. ¬†In other words, everything’s per usual¬†for Kazmir.
Corey Seager – Suddenly no one knows when Seager’s going to return, and it’s not a back injury but an oblique injury. ¬†Damn, I really wish I wrote a schmohawk post on Seager, he really feels headed that way, and I am not drafting him unless he falls.
Salvador Perez – Inflammation on his knee after Drew Butera steamrolled him at the plate. ¬†It was like the immovable object meeting the barely running object that is fat AF. ¬†Perez should return in a week, and I haven’t moved him, but wouldn’t draft him anyway.
Max Scherzer – Might miss Opening Day as he works his way back from a stress fracture of his ring finger. ¬†Funny, I get stressed by just looking at my ring finger. ¬†Scherzer and I are so simpatico. ¬†In order to return, Scherzer needed to modify his fastball using now¬†a three-fingered grip. ¬†“I never had problems throwing a fastball, though Paper, Rock, Scissors was a challenge.” ¬†That’s Three-Finger Brown. ¬†I haven’t adjusted Scherzer’s rankings, but I was already much lower on him and never planned on drafting him.
Zack Greinke – Showing diminished velocity, topping out at 89 MPH on his fastball. ¬†He said, “It is what it is. ¬†It‚Äôs still early and it‚Äôs not like some crazy, crazy thing. ¬†But it‚Äôs not ideal, either.” ¬†Oddly enough, he threw a fastball before he started talking and finished his thought before the ball reached home plate. ¬†I’m not moving Greinke down in my rankings, but he’s headed for a worse year than last year and last year he had a 4.37 ERA.
Socrates Brito – Underwent surgery on his dislocated finger. ¬†Socrates can’t locate his¬†finger because all he wears are togas and they have no pockets. ¬†“Where’d I put that thing down?!”