Shields’s season proves one thing.  He doesn’t answer to you, he doesn’t answer to anyone.  Not today, not tomorrow, not even on Cinco de Mayo.  Then Shields steals a knot of hundreds from a drug dealer, nurses a drug addict mother back to health and then kills a criminal only to cover it up.  Shields, the anti-hero.  Oops, I was watching a best of The Shield, and Vic Mackey had me feeling dirty, like a renegade cop!  The renegade cop — fun on TV or movies; pain in the ass in real life.  In September, James Shields has a 0.00 ERA, rolling off of yesterday’s 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 8 Ks with his ERA down to 3.13.  His season has really been all over the map from month to month.  On the bad side of things, May ERA 4.69 and June ERA 4.88.  On the good side of things, July ERA 2.63; April ERA 1.60; August ERA 2.95, and the aforementioned September.  Maybe the Royals knew something when they traded away Wil Myers.  Or maybe we can at least pretend they did for this year.  “I got short term eyes, not to be confused with short eyes like Elmore Leonard.”  That’s Dayton Moore.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Lorenzo Cain – 3-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI and his 29th steal.  I hate, hate, hate — hatehatehate!!! — that you can’t replace a player in a game that’s been postponed after the start time.  Really makes no sense, and ended up costing me a game I could’ve used from Cain…Sugar!  Fix yo’ shizz, ESPN and Yahoo!

Wade Davis – 1 IP, 0 ER and keeps racking up saves while Greg Holland’s owners are cleaning off the pie tin like Ted McGinley, screaming, “Hey, those are my saves!”

Rick Porcello – 6 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.27.  In 189 2/3 IP, he has 34 walks.  Imagine if he didn’t have a measly 5.6 K-rate.  I’d be all over him like white on Charlie Blackmon.

Jose Iglesias – Cleared for lower body workouts.  I think that means he can twerk.

Anibal Sanchez – Played catch in a cage, while screaming, “I’m not an animal!”

Masahiro Tanaka – Could return sometime between September 19-21.  According to the NY Daily News, “Regardless of the Yankees’ position in the standings, the plan is for Tanaka to pitch a game or two before the end of the season, giving both the club and the pitcher a chance to see if he can pitch through the partially torn UCL in his right elbow.”  I don’t even need to comment on that.  It is as crazy as it sounds.  This is stupidity like when your parents decided to have sex through a partially torn condom.  Can I not draft Tanaka for 2015 already or do I have to wait until next year?

Carlos Beltran – Scratched with a sore elbow.  Whose back did he scratch with his sore elbow, Jeter?  No re2pect.

Brett Gardner – Sounds like he’s going to miss at least a few more days due to his abdomen.  Can understand that for a guy who’s constantly sliding head first, he needs abs of steal.

Chris Capuano – 1/3 IP, 4 ER.  After he was pulled early from the game, the Yankees made him sit on the bench with a picture of Scherzer’s face covering his.

Brian McCann – 2-for-3, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 18th homer, hitting .241.  I could picture a scenario where I draft McCann in the last rounds next year, drop him after about two weeks then he ends up having a top 5 catcher season.  Notice how I have faith in me being smart to draft him, but not smart to hold him.  Yup.

Krispie Young – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer on the Yanks, and 9th overall.  Krispie does tend to get smokin’ hot, but he’s also in one weird-ass platoon between the All-Stars of yesteryear.

Jake Odorizzi – 4 1/3 IP, 6 ER.  Gonna need to bathe in tomato juice to get that Odorizzi off you.

James Loney – 2-for-3, 1 run.  Continue to remember why you picked him up.  You didn’t pick him up?  Oh, bad call, Ke-mo Sah-bee.

Evan Longoria – 1-for-4, 2 runs and his 20th homer.  Fizzlebang, mazel tov!  Took a whole lot of beans burnin’ on the grill to get up that hill.  I’d love if he could chuck in five homers more before we later gator this season.  I’m greedy, y’all!

Dilson Herrera – 0-for-1, 2 runs as he played at 2nd base with Daniel Murphy (Who?  Oh, him.) started at 3rd base.  Love that for NL-Only leagues, Dilson hasn’t done much yet to require my excitement for mixed leagues.  Soon, young Padawan, soon.

Rafael Montero – 5 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks.  You could throw Harvey Korman against the Rockies on the road and he’d pitch a shutout.  Hashtag truth, hashtag and he’s dead.

Domonic Brown – Left yesterday’s game with a shoulder contusion after diving for a ball.  David Spade showed a picture of Brown diving to the ground and said, “Look, children, a falling star.”

Pedro Alvarez – Done for the season with a stress reaction in the fourth metatarsal in his left foot.  Revisiting powerful recurring themes in his work like sisterhood and strikeouts, Pedro I-Want-A-Do-Over hopes to return next year with his muse, Penelope Cruz.

Andrew McCutchen – 2-for-4 and an inside the park homer, his 23rd.  A position player pitching is like a cat playing the piano or a monkey tap dancing.  It’s ridiculous in its absurdity.  But what’s an inside the park homer?  I wanna say it’s like when you’re in bed with the lights off, getting ready for schlafen and you put on one of those GoPro, headcam YouTube videos with people back-flipping off a canyon cliff.  Shizz is just exhilarating.

Jordy Mercer – 2-for-4, 1 run.  Member when he wasn’t a hot schmotato?  I don’t, that’s how long ago it was!

Russell Martin – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer, hitting .291.  Has two hits in three of his last four games, and another homer in the last eight games.  He’s actually been decent this year as a 2nd catcher, or very deep league first catcher.  Only Alyssa from Los Angeles knows how deep.

Drew Hutchison – 6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 10 Ks.  I streamed him for this start *puts fingertips together by lips* muah!  I also dropped him about halfway through when I saw his next start wasn’t favorable.  Gotta love ’em and leave ’em, that’s what my pimp mentor always told me.

Dioner Navarro – 2-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 3rd steal, hitting near-.400 in the last week.  Let’s talk about a confluence of things that don’t make any sense.  The Jays scored 11 runs and Dioner was the star of the game.  Not much from Edwin.  Nothing from Bautista.  On top of that bizarre turn of events, Dioner stole a base.  Anthopoulos does sound like a Mayan name.

Kyle Hendricks – 5 2/3 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA up to 2.38.  Hasn’t been anywhere close to that good.  “That Good” is standing over there, Hendricks is down the block quite a ways.  Would need to feel desperation creeping over my turtleneck to go near him.

Jorge Soler – 1-for-4 and his 4th homer, hitting .356.  It feels like just yesterday I had a Delaware-sized boner for Baez and Arismendy.  Now it’s the size of Rhode Island and mother-effin’ Curt Schilling’s bankrupting it.  Stop bankrupting my boner, Curt Schilling!  I only mention this because the league catches up to a hitter and they slump, then they come back twice as strong, and Soler may not slump until next year, which would kinda suck.

John Lackey – 2 IP, 2 ER, and ejected for arguing balls and strikes.  I’m sure glad I wasted a precious Game Start on that.  *dons Big Bird costume, goes on African safari, runs at the lions with Big Bird arms flapping*  Lackey, you’ve killed my will to live, you fargin’ bastage!

Alfredo Simon – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.48.  Between Aroldis having kidnapped girls tied up in his room, Cueto K-rah-ta’ing LaRue into retirement and Simon killing someone in his home country, I’m surprised Jay Bruce hasn’t ended up in a shallow grave for his offensive output this year.

Brandon Phillips – 2-for-4, 1 RBI.  Every time I look at waivers, I see at the top is BP.  Has the most ownership and has been the best in the last 15 days.  And every time I ignore him.

Dustin Pedroia – Will have season-ending surgery.  He’s droppable in all leagues.  I goofed yesterday when I said Play-Doh was used to make a lame copy of a picture.  It’s Silly Putty.  Maybe I should have Torii Hunter administer me a concussion test.  Any the hoo!  I suggested that there should be a glossary term for a player who plays at 50% through an injury, and looks like a bad imitation of themselves.  I’m open to suggestions.  Please put them in the comments.

Brandon Workman – 3 IP, 5 ER.  Hey, Workman, you’re fired.  *looks at reflection, smiles*  I love you.

Xander Bogaerts – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 11th homer and 2nd homer in as many games as he bats over .350 in the last week.  Little ones, listen, learn from me, you could be the best, but sitting in your room depressed with a junky MI and you’ll never progress.  I grabbed Xander two days ago and haven’t looked back, though that’s partly due to a stiff neck.

Carlos Rivero – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 1st homer as he started at 3rd base.  Rivero once was considered a power threat at shortstop, and now seven years later he’s at 3rd base and hit 5 homers in Triple-A.  Seems like it would be a positive to say to Rivero that his ship has sailed, but not so much.

Caleb Joseph – 3-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer.  Say Caleeb or Caleb (Kweli) is what you need to win, then what do you do?  Ah, Reflection Eternal.

Wei-Yin Chen – 7 IP, 1 ER, 3 baserunners, 4 Ks.  Stream-o-Nator hated this start, so there ya go.  A machine with human features and dead fish eyes doesn’t know everything.  It doesn’t like his next start either, and I could see it going either way.  Not without its risks.

Ryan Flaherty – 4-for-5, 1 run, 1 RBI.  Flaherty’s so much better than when there’s no faux excitement in front of his last name.

Alejandro De Aza – 1-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI and his 17th steal.  This comes after a two-homer game.  Probably will stop being Mike Trout at some point, but I’d definitely ride him, in the non-sexual way.

Hisashi Iwakuma – 4 1/3 IP, 4 ER, ERA up to 3.11.  Against the Astros, no less.  I mean, no more, as in slurp SLURP, now burp BURP.

Nick Tropeano – 5 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks.  Breezed through the minors as only an Astros prospect could.  What I mean is they don’t have a ton of major league options, so if someone does okay, they promote the crap out of them.  In Triple-A, he had a 8.7 K/9, 0.99 WHIP and a 3.03 ERA in 124 2/3 IP.  This late in the season, I’d have to be crazy desperate to take a chance on him since his stuff isn’t overpowering (heavily relies on a change), but could be someone to stash in crazy deep keeper leagues.

Tony Sipp – 1 IP, 0 ER and the save.  Ah, so the Astros saves picture is Fields and the field.

Gregor Blanco – 2-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI and his 15th steal.  Here’s my batty call for today.  Steal five bases and hit three homers today for the five-slam-a-legger.  Please.

Ryan Vogelsong – 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA down to 3.90.  And you can tell everybody this is your Vogelsong.  Hope you don’t mind I put it down in words like schmotato, batty call, streamer and fizzlebang.

Josh Collmenter – 6 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA down to 3.67.  Whenever I see Collmenter in the box score, I always expect him to ask me a catcher question.  Is that weird?

Josh Hamilton – Out of the Angels lineup for the sixth day in a row.  The Angels aren’t optimistic about him, which is depressing.  If Angels can’t be optimistic, how can us mere mortals?

Matt Shoemaker – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA down to 3.16.  I’m gonna like Shoemaker a lot next year, but for this year it’s all about his next matchup, and the Stream-o-Nator is meh on it, but I’d still start him there.

David Freese – 3-for-4.  What terrible Arnold as Dr. Freeze pun do we have for him today?  Hey, Freese, the heat is on!

Howie Kendrick – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 1 RBI.  The Hitmaker is Howie to a Tee, right, Chubb?

Kole Calhoun – 2-for-6 and his 16th homer and, like, his tenth homer in the last three games.  Watch out, Dale Long, Diamond Dallas Calhoun is coming for you!

Huston Street – Sidelined until Friday with a sore hamstring, i.e., Street’s temporarily closed, use Rue du Joe Smith.

Chris Bassitt – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks.  Too bad Bassitt didn’t face Pomeranz as the Westminster Kennel Club would’ve liked it.  Bassit’s actually shown really good stuff in the minors, can hit 94 MPH on the speed gun, and had a 9+ K/9 in Double-A.  Though, who are we kidding, I wouldn’t trust him with H2H playoffs and roto league championships on the line, and the Stream-o-Nator agrees.

John Jaso – Not cleared to play after failing his concussion test.  A’s will have to play with only 4 catchers and 6 DHs for the time being.

Jeff Samardzija – 7 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.41 on A’s, and 3.10 overall.  Hasn’t shown huge K numbers this year, but the drop in walks has made him more of a #2 than his crazy 4+ BB/9 years ever would have.  I say well played, Samardzija, and I say it with my hand over my mouth so it’s not as obvious I can’t say his name.

Marcell Ozuna – 1-for-4 and his 22nd homer.  OZUNA hit ball.  OZUNA told to round bases.  OZUNA only see square bases, need to ask question of teammates.

Jarred Cosart – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks vs. Wily Peralta (6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks).  This matchup was billed as Jarred/Wily, the sequel to Blackfish.

Jean Segura – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 18th steal.  Segura’s now hitting near-.400 in the last week with steals in back-to-back games.  It’s gonna blow some minds how I’m going in on Segura next year, but this is about this year still and if you need a hot schmotato, it’s worth a shot.

Gerardo Parra – 2-for-4 and his 8th steal.  Speaking of hot schmotatoes…. I’m over Parra making Khris Davis fight for PT, I’ll keep that on the hush-hush QT.  Right now, Parra is hitting near-.400 in the last week.

Everth Cabrera – Unlikely to rejoin the Padres this weekend.  If you’re hoping for EverCab to return, then you’re probably related to him.  Hey, EverCab bro!

Ian Kennedy – 6 IP, 3 ER, 11 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.77 vs. Dan Haren (7 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks).  2011 called and said, “Damn, I must be getting old, too.”  You are, 2011.

Carl Crawford – 4-for-4, 1 run, 2 RBIs.  “Hey, I’m having a renaissance.  This is cool!” said 2011.

B.J. Upton – 1-for-4 and his 11th homer, hitting .207.  Member when he was the leadoff hitter for six weeks?  Oh, we had a good laugh, didn’t we?  Fredi Gonzalez, the star of What On Earth Were You Thinking?

Jason Heyward – 3-for-5, 1 run and his 18th steal.  He has 11 homers on the year, but imagine if he hit 25 homers with 20-steal speed?  That’s the kind of thinking that could have a fantasy baseball ‘pert like moi ranking him higher than he should next year.

Bryce Harper – 1-for-4 and his 12th homer.  The cuckoo clock goes cluck!  That’s my Harper home run call if I’m announcing the game.

Stephen Strasburg – 6 IP, 3 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA up to 3.46 as he was outpitched by Aaron Harang (7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 9 Ks).  This matchup has me thinking of the work of Serge Voronoff.  Serge was famed for implanting monkey testicles into humans.  He achieved great fame until the use of monkey testicles fell out of favor, and he became the subject of ridicule.  Yesterday, even Strasburg’s owners would’ve liked some of The Harangutan’s balls.

 
  1. SMLV1 says:
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    Currently on a bye, Odorizzi got blown up by the Yanks. Dropped him for deGrom good move? Odorizzi faces the Yanks again next week.

    Would you drop Gio or E. Santana for Stroman? Concerned about him getting shutdown soon?

    Standard Redraft league.

    • Joeg414 says:
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      @SMLV1: Being a Met fan , they might shut down DeGrom after one more start

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @SMLV1: Depends on matchups

  2. Hondo says:
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    Your man love for Bogaerts touches me.Hey,get those hands back in your own pants!
    Mookie or Bogaerts at MI?
    MI weird?

  3. IPA Guy says:
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    Do you like Jacob Turner against Reds on 9/15 as much as Streamonator? (#10/$6.9)

    I need to replace a couple SP’s for quarter finals next week. 20 team league so looking at guys like Delgado, Montero, Tropeano, Bassitt, Penny, T May, Nokasco, Cory Rasmus, Ranaudo, Workman, and Turner from above. Top 3 from this list please?

    Also, worth keeping Smyly on deep bench so I can keep him in 12th round (pick 221) next year?

    Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @IPA Guy: I don’t love Turner, and neither does SON… Under $8 isn’t good… Depends on matchups… Sure, hold Smyly

      • IPA Guy says:
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        @Grey: Thanks. I hear ya, but in a 20 team league I’m not going to find “good” – just looking for best available. My list is mostly -$ matchups (and now Turner shows up on 9/14 vs Pitt at -$3 anyway.) Thinking Delgado, Montero, Tropeano from available? The joy of being in a 20 team league.

        Oh, and thanks for your game postponement hate blurb – I too have gotten screwed by that with yahoo and would love to see it changed.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Trop, Montero

          • IPA Guy says:
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            @Grey: Thanks!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              No problem

  4. Aaron says:
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    Bwhaha… My ass is most likely grass for the year… but I have to still read the column if only for the Ozuna remarks.

    added de aza (-braun), mcgehee (-alvarez), pine-aider (-salazar), and storen (-benoit) for the stretch run, so i could put a few more bucks in the winners pockets. Pine-aider was the smoothest one being that I own Cobb and we have innings limits. d’oh!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Aaron: Thanks! Nice…

  5. Tarman Got Him says:
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    Start Fartolon colonoscopy @ WAS?

    All my streamers and pitchers period tend to get lit up by PHI for some reason? Which leads to my next q?

    Btw, everytime I say Fartolo, cause of you, out loud, I historically crack up haha.

    Would you start Alvarez @ PHI Froday or Gee @ WAS

    • P_Swayz on a horse says:
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      @Tarman Got Him: Well, if history is an indicator, you will continue to do so.

      I didn’t make the playoffs this year in the keeper league I’ve been running for 8 years. It is the first time I haven’t. The guy in first place purposefully didn’t reach his innings so that the person he was playing would win all the pitching categories. By doing that, the guy he was playing made the playoffs instead of me by one game. He admitted that he did it because he didn’t want my team in the playoffs (they have been on fire the last 6 weeks).

      How upset should I be about that? It screwed up, right?

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @P_Swayz on a horse: it’s not screwed up if he thinks you’re team is the better team, and due to that he’d rather play somebody else. it’s strategy. It’s actually a show of being afraid of your team.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Tarman Got Him: I wouldn’t start Bartolo at Wash… Wouldn’t start any of these guys away, though I don’t think they’re away

      • Tarman Got Him says:
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        @Grey: Forgot to mention Gray. I’m up 8-2 round one in he playoffs and I’m down in ERA and WHIP but up in saves wins and K’s, so I’m going for
        Those 3 of 5z.

        Stream em?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          @Tarman Got Him: I’d stream Gray I guess, no idea of his matchup either

    • goodfold2 says:
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      @Tarman Got Him: Gee’s vs WAS not at them.

  6. Wilson says:
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    Hi Grey , thanks for your daily updates. Pick two best starters in a W & QS league each day. Thanks.

    9/12
    Cole vs CHN TWada(L) $18.4
    Gonzalez vs NYM DGee(R) $16.1
    Quintana vs MIN PHughes(R) $15.9
    Nuno vs SD EStults(L) $13.6
    Wilson vs HOU BOberholtzer(L) $13.6
    Ryu vs SF MBumgarner(L) $13.3

    9/13
    Weaver vs HOU SFeldman(R) $15.8
    Nelson vs CIN DAxelrod(R) $12
    Wheeler vs WSH DFister(R) $11.8
    Anderson vs SD ODespaigne(R) $10.8
    Locke vs CHN FDoubront(L) $9.1

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Wilson: Gonzalez, Cole…. Weaver, Wheeler

  7. Nimrod says:
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    Duplicate for a 50% player.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Nimrod: I think we can do better

  8. Swfcdan says:
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    Finally my H2H playoffs are about to arrive, Ive been leading my division all year. But of course I lose Tulo, Zimm and Tanaka on the way so have very little shot of getting any further now (reason to not like H2H!)

    Needing a miracle, should I keep rolling Bruce out there in a hope of a true one that he actually homers, or should I say f you Bruce nevr drafting you again and play one of these shmos at Util instead:

    Philipps, Headley, Bourn, Kiermaier, Beltran (all have been cold)

    Seriously has Bruce been the biggest schmohawk disappointment out off all the studs this year??

  9. JeF With 1 F says:
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    FACT OF THE DAY:
    “K” was chosen to stand for a strikeout in baseball because “S” was being used to denote a sacrifice.

  10. Tyler says:
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    Brad Miller or Bogaerts?

  11. Ante GALIC says:
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    Grey,

    Have moved my ditty from Down in a Hole to Sea of Sorrow! I’ll be singing Angry Chair by week’s end for benching Shoemaker in favor of ‘Kuma. Really only one matchup that might be possible. Need more than luck, but sometimes dumb luck is just enough.

    Cheers,
    Ante

  12. brett says:
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    CBS let’s you change your lineup after games have started (in case of postponements) and in the case of complex leagues like ours it’s the only usable website. Come on Grey, join us other 1%’s on CBS!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @brett: I’m at CBS for a few leagues, I didn’t mention them

    • goodfold2 says:
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      @brett: they have a great site, and it costs money too.

  13. Marc says:
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    Schlockelganger
    Limposter

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Marc: Limposter — Ha! I like that… You’re in the lead

      • Marc says:
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        @Grey: Can we safely call the fight so I can assume my sacred position in the Glosssry, and if so, you’ve made my week. Ok, who am I kidding, my year. Oh, and it’s Marc R from Syosset, NY :)

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha! Gotta leave it open until tonight

          • Marc says:
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            @Grey: Ok, in that case, bring it on Razzballers!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Haha

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              You should share your story of how limposter came to you…

              • Marc says:
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                Just a moment of sheer clarity during my morning commute. Next up, the solution for world peace. Stay tuned…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  I’m here for it!

  14. Kyle h says:
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    12 team obp, slugging, sb-cs, runs, hrs, and rbis

    Xander Bogaerts or Asdrubal Cabrera for the weekend and ROS?

  15. de nachos says:
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    to rewatch The Shield is the only reason I bought Hulu Plus (p.s. stupid commercials). I also vetoed the name Shane for my son because of that show.

    OZUNA round bases made me lulz

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @de nachos: Haha… Not even on Cinco de Mayo commercial plays all the time… You should watch Life on Mars…

      • de nachos says:
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        @Grey: eh, I’ve had enough of Kristen Bell with Frozen playing non-stop in my house…oh ok, different Mars show. thanks for the recommendation. US version?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          No, not US version… Original only

        • J-FOH says:
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          @de nachos: you got to let it go Nacho

  16. Clint says:
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    Ervin Santana is available on my waiver wire. Should I drop anyone to go get him for the playoff run in my h2h pts league?

    Liriano, Arrieta, Gray, Fister, Shark, Ventura, Minor, Cobb, Salazar, Wacha, Fiers, Teheran, Keuchel

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Clint: Depends on matchups, Salazar isn’t safe though

  17. RainesCokeOnMyOtisNixon says:
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    Hey @grey
    Hope the end of your season is going as well as your firsgt Shabbos dinner at your ex GF’s house…I feel her name was Stephanie Rosenzwieg….no?

    For real though….I am still holding onto Koji AND Benoit in a VERY deep and VERY active league. I am in a DOGFIGHT for the final spot….Literally every cat is close as hell other than the dude clinched wins and probably losses. So you see where I am going.

    Do I lose koji or benoit for some how sweet schmotatoes? Schmotatos? Or “let’s call the whole thing off”?

    If I win I am up against a guy stacked with closers next week ….I assume WIN TODAY WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW? Drop ’em and grab….de aza for a double header tomorrow??

  18. papasmurf says:
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    Man that OAK pen cost my SPs 2 wins this week. OAK is lifeless.

    Mercer, Grandy, de Aza, come on down! Damn my offense is bad lol. Trying to keep the mushroom house up for another 2.5 weeks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha, keep it together, Papa Smurf!

  19. Chris says:
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    Playing through an injury like Pedroia:

    The Little Engine That Could
    Silicon Man (tough but not that though)
    DL Tease
    Half Man/Half Injury

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Chris: Not bad, I like limposter better

  20. Lincecuminmypants says:
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    “a player who plays at 50% through an injury, and looks like a bad imitation of themselves.”

    Fall Star
    Schmofessional
    Dead Williams

    • Lincecuminmypants says:
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      @Lincecuminmypants: I guess you could also do Schmo DiMaggio, but I’m a Red Sox fan.

  21. Joe says:
    (link)

    On a scale from 1-10, 10 being dumbest, how dumb should I feel for dropping Span for Lagares?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Joe: 1

      • Joe says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        You really know how to boost a guy’s spirits, Grey. For today, I see you in shades of bright bright Grey. Do with that what you will.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          No problem

        • goodfold2 says:
          (link)

          @Joe: Grey actually would have told you to do that on purpose, so you’d likely have a negative number.

  22. tvators says:
    (link)

    Pedroia’s Dupe (duplicate)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @tvators: I like limposter better

  23. The Strolg says:
    (link)

    A. Term for when you say one thing and mean another- in your best Homer Simpson voice ‘Play-DOH!’
    B. Is there any chance that Hurry K as in Krazy ‘nobody doubted that he pulled the trigga’ Nigga is actually Au Shizz in blackface ala Al Jolson? Since Goldy disappeared from our beloved game Carter has hit 15 dingers, raised his average 25 points and has stolen 3 bases in the last 5 games. Has anyone seen the two together?
    C.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @The Strolg: Yeah, prolly re: Hurry K’d

  24. Tony Mags says:
    (link)

    Start Pineda against Alex Cobb in New York?

  25. TOGMAN says:
    (link)

    Drop Hardy for Bogaerts? 12-team H2H – OPS

  26. j says:
    (link)

    Hey Grey,

    Best bet for saves this week?
    I’m leaning Petricka

    Quack, Qualls, Fields, Petricka, Sanchez, Familia

    Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @j: Quack

  27. DatDude says:
    (link)

    I dropped Calhoun for Lagares on Friday after reading Buy/Sell. My H2H playoff opponent this week picked him up on Monday. You know how this story ends

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @DatDude: Hopefully it ends better than it starts

  28. Anal Herschiser says:
    (link)

    Hello Grey:

    I think your mustache is bionic, I don’t think it’s beautiful, I think it’s beyond it. But who would you start in H2H over the next four days – OZUNA (4 games @phi) or Dickerson (3 games @stl)? Thanks!

  29. Fireball Feliz says:
    (link)

    Why is streamer so low on Cobb today? Is any opposing pitcher pitching in the Bronx on 9/11 automatically jinxed?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Fireball Feliz: Ha, hasn’t liked him in away start all year

  30. Greys #1 Fan says:
    (link)

    Hey Grey,

    Who do you like as SS the next week and a half? Mercer or Bogartz ?

    And who for utility? Lagares, Crawford, or blanco?

    Thanks!

  31. Phil of the Future says:
    (link)

    Having trouble killing time on the bye week, Grey.
    I’ve fixed everything around my house that I could. Now I’m going around breaking stuff just so I can fix it.

    Quick thoughts about a pitcher whose been with me all year. Big Erv has a two-start week with both at home. Against the Nats and the Mets. He’s been a bit worrisome lately after a real nice stretch, but you gotta run him out there for the week, right? Don’t overthink it?

      • Phil of the Future says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Good show, huh? The BBC one or the American version?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          BBC, def…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          State of Play is solid on Hulu too

          • Phil of the Future says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Thanks, man. I’ll check it out and when I check baseball again sunday night I’ll see that Jay Bruce has gotten hot with 3 homers over the weekend so I don’t have to think about benching him for my semifinal

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Haha

  32. sniff test says:
    (link)

    Do you like Liriano today at Philly vs. Burnett? SON says 16.1

  33. Hi Grey —

    Would you rather have De Aza, Pearce, or Blanco as a UTIL bat/5th OF? No particular need … I’m in decent shape across hitting categories but am trying to assure the bottom doesn’t fall out of my team in the home stretch.

    And for vulture saves and maybe a vulture win, who’s your pick between Aaron Sanchez and Fields?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Enrique: De Aza…Fields

  34. Pewter Gray Clouds says:
    (link)

    Lets take a moment and remember our fallen heros on today….

    Ok so thinking i should drop Jay Bruce for probably xander? In order to do that i need to promote wacha from my DL and drop odorizzi or drop wacha and keep odorizzi for his two start week. What are your thoughts?

    • Pewter Gray Clouds says:
      (link)

      @Pewter Gray Clouds: Ok, so new plan, Im on a bye this week so i decided to just drop odorizzi because i am confident i can pick him back up before monday if i want too. I know Wacha will get picked up if i drop him cause people think he more awesome than slice cheese in this league! So i want to see his start this sunday before i make a move on him. But on to Jay Bruce, Im thinking i am going to go with mercer over bogaerts because i need help at 2nd base and drop the Bruce. Since i am on a bye do you think i am making moves too soon? Should i wait or pick up some guys that are hot now hoping they keep it going into next week?

      Im freaking out in this league, Since the inception of this league i have finished 5th,4th,3rd,2nd consecutively so im feeling the pressure to finished 1st this year. I NEED IT!

  35. JeF With 1 F says:
    (link)

    Fraction Jackson

    playing at a fraction of what he should be and who doesn’t love Carl Weathers

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @JeF With 1 F: Ha, not bad, I like limposter better

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @JeF With 1 F: but Carl always produces for us 100% every time out…like Billy D Williams

      • JeF With 1 F says:
        (link)

        @J-FOH: Hence the “Fraction”

          • JeF With 1 F says:
            (link)

            @J-FOH: Love Predator

  36. Pete says:
    (link)

    H2H points playoffs with 2 adds left this week – Is Wade Davis a good pluck for total points through Sunday over gambling on a bottom of the barrel streamer? We get 8 pts for Saves, 10 pts for wins, 2pts for IP, 2pts for Ks, -1pt per baseruner, and -2 pts per ER.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Pete: Sure

  37. nick the dick says:
    (link)

    Confused as to why the Indians game is locked already and therefore locking my whole shizz

    • JeF With 1 F says:
      (link)

      @nick the dick: F the indians

      • nick the dick says:
        (link)

        @JeF With 1 F: that must be it

        • nick the dick says:
          (link)

          @nick the dick: well espn has their double header as first game today at 12:35 and the second game, which is after it at 3:35, listed as 12am midnight? Which already happened, so my lineups locked last night at the stroke of midnight? Is it just me or is this the stupidest thing ive ever seen? Am im losing it? Dreaming?

          • Schoolboy P says:
            (link)

            @nick the dick:

            I think a lot of people are calling the ESPN helpline trying to get this fixed.

            • Militant Vegans says:
              (link)

              @Schoolboy P: From ESPN

              GAME NOTICE:
              We apologize for the incorrect lock time in the MIN/CLE game, and the frustration this has caused. The game locked due to an incorrect game time for the first game of the double-header, and unfortunately we are unable to unlock the game. We have corrected that error to ensure that it will not happen again. All games tomorrow will lock at the correct time.

              • Grey

                Grey says:
                (link)

                Totally sucks

                • Militant Vegans says:
                  (link)

                  @Grey: right? Hey ESPN… go back to concentrating on sports. Leave the fluff, human interest, & “decisions” to TMZ. And while we’re at it… hey MTV, play a flippin’ music video.

                  • Grey

                    Grey says:
                    (link)

                    Seriously… Enough with who had the battered wife video and when… Just throw the guy in prison and talk about baseball!

                    • goodfold2 says:
                      (link)

                      @Grey: so if you had an espn team, and forgot to say, change your lineups for today, you’ll miss having a player who may play 2 games! sure am glad i set vargas in in my only espn league last night.

  38. Jack says:
    (link)

    Is R. Soriano not going to close for the next 1.5 weeks (during my championship)? I can drop him to pick up Storen but if Soriano is put back in to close, I might not be able to get him back. Storen or Soriano?

    • Wilsonian says:
      (link)

      @Jack: Storen. Do it now.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Jack: Yes, Storen

  39. Wilsonian says:
    (link)

    Drop Mookie for any of the following:

    De Aza
    Xander
    Crawford
    Grandy

    8 Team H2H – H, R, HR, RBI, SB, AVG, OBPS

  40. a bag of Cabreras says:
    (link)

    Bad imitations: “droppelganger”, or “doppelhangover” as in “I suffered a sever doppelhangover from holding onto Pedroia and Segura.”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @a bag of Cabreras: Droppelganger is in the glossary already for a different reason

      • Fat Girls on Mopeds feat. Seamus says:
        (link)

        @Grey: What about “Kweifer Sunterland” as a bad imitation

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Nice username… I like limposter better

          • Fat Girls on Mopeds feat. Seamus says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Thanks, I can’t stop eating, I mean, dreaming of them. Like limposter too, as soon as I read it my mind went total Tom Cruising, like I got all pipped squeaked.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Haha

  41. JAL says:
    (link)

    With the season on the line, would anyone trust any of these guys tomorrow? Vidal Nuno v. SD; Kyle Lohse v. CIN; Bud Norris v. NYY? Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @JAL: Nuno

      • JAL says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Thanks. On another note. Can I drop Braun at this point or what? Any news?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yes

  42. Randy BoBandy says:
    (link)

    Far too much comedy for one entry, well played yet again.

    Having a bye in both leagues is borrrrrrrrring

    • Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey says:
      (link)

      @Randy BoBandy: better than the other kind of not playing right now boring.

  43. Jon says:
    (link)

    Are you starting Cobb @ NYY today? H2H playoffs so I can’t afford any blow ups. Peavy vs ARI is an easy start, yes?

    • @Jon: I’d start both.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Jon: Both, yes

      • MooseOutFront says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Thanks Grey. I meant to ask the same Cobb question. I want to start him but was going to defer to your advice.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I’d start him

  44. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    It is complete effin bs that espn and its good ole boy mentality is too into football and lets it first day interns run the fantasy baseball department. Their last update made invisible icons. Today we are locked because they effin can’t tell time. Mofo dumbasses. Well i feel better now like my morning evac all over again.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Toe Knee: Yeah, what’s going on with that shizz, messing my shizz up

    • Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey says:
      (link)

      @Toe Knee: big corporations are stupid at the very top too, see that NFL comish and his b.s. You really think his PR people didn’t see that one coming, no, he just ignored them due to hubris.

  45. Spring Blake says:
    (link)

    Anyone else notice espn fucked up the min/cle double header today and had one of the games starting at midnight? Now there’s no add drops available at all today…. get your god damn shizz together espn. Thank god based kluber was already in my lineup!

    • Spring Blake says:
      (link)

      @Spring Blake: Also, what’s everyone’s feelings on kazmir @ chw today (SON 6.2$), and Eovaldi @ MIL (2.2$)

      H2H categories playoffs and have a solid lead in ratios, could use the QS and K’s though.

      I’m already starting Fiers, so could maybe afford to bench both.

      • Schoolboy P says:
        (link)

        @Spring Blake:

        ESPN is aware of the issue and has opened a “master ticket”. Cross your fingers that they resolve it by 1205ET in which rosters will re-lock and there will be nothing they can do.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Spring Blake: Yeah, it’s all screwy… I wouldn’t start either of those SPs

      • Spring Blake says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Haha, oh the joys of ESPN’s fantasy department. Do you think a “master ticket” initiates some kind of code red alert and has the lineup department scrambling around the office?

        Thanks for the SP advice as always grey

        • Spring Blake says:
          (link)

          @Spring Blake: Also not fixed before the real lock…. fuck

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I figured they wouldn’t fix it… There would be a real revolt if they would’ve said, “We’re not doing anything.” Instead of “We’re trying.”

          • Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey says:
            (link)

            @Grey: yahoo routinely has a X next to a guy who is playing, or a ^ next to a guy who isn’t. that’s not a once occuring phenomenon, but at least you can correct it by simply not trusting anything they say about whether or not people are playing in a game. unless you have enough add/drops to stream batty calls though setting monday/thursday lineups in advance is really easy usually (most of the time it requires no though, since some guys are off)

  46. Hawk says:
    (link)

    The problem with Tanaka: It takes 18 months to get back to full strength following TJ surgery. Guys come back in a year but they don’t really regain form until 18 months pass.

    If Tanaka has surgery in October that puts his “one year date” at September 2015 with “full strength” date at March 2016. He’d come back next year for a start or two and be ready for 2016

    If Tanaka waits and then fully blows out his arm in pre-season, that puts his “one year” date at March 2016 and “full strength” date at September 2016. He’d pitch the whole season at “recovering strength” levels. Doing it this way has caused plenty of other guys to hurt other things. Shoulders, Arms…careers.

    The Yankees have a history of mucking up rehabs. They’ve done this exact thing wrong at least twice – see Chien Ming Wang and Joba Chamberlain’s rehab disasters.

    In the history of Baseball, I can’t think of one guy who had a partially torn ligament that pitched through it with success. Just have him get the surgery. Please. PLEASE.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Hawk: I think Halladay did for a while, but I hear ya

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @Grey: finally somebody remembers ONE guy. i’ve asked everybody about that.

  47. From the Texas Rangers web site:

    Jaime Kelly reporting:

    I have learned this evening through a source with knowledge of the situation that long-time Texas Rangers skipper Ron Washington’s sudden departure from the club was due to impending legal issues stemming from an alleged sexual assault of an Asian reporter.

      • Toe Knee says:
        (link)

        @Grey: It was all a misunderstanding. He just wanted to dip his eggroll in her moo shi pork.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I’m gonna Moo Goo Guy her!

        • PK says:
          (link)

          @Toe Knee: Eh, shouldn’t the lady have something egg-related instead?

          How about filling her Egg Foo Young with his Sweet & Sour Pork?

  48. My CBS semi final game update for my new #1 fan, Cram…HEHE

    Orioles Magic 167
    Malicious Phenoms 160.67

    • JeF With 1 F says:
      (link)

      @Malicious Phenom: If you lose to a team named Orioles Magic you should retire

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        It’s Tony Wonder!

    • Cram It says:
      (link)

      @Malicious Phenom: What a nailbiter. I’ve got my pom poms already to go for todays slate of games. That guy has O’s magic on his side, but you have me on your side. I’m available for assistance should you need it.

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Cram It: I could you us a pom pom too, you available for weekends? ;) LOL! HA!

        • Cram It says:
          (link)

          @J-FOH: Hey-O! There’s not much I won’t do for money…

          • J-FOH says:
            (link)

            @Cram It: You cheer whore

  49. Crice21 says:
    (link)

    Should I be worried about Utley at this point going into my last two weeks of the playoffs? Better to roll with someone hot?

    Other options would be: Mercer, Jose Ramirez, LaMahieu, Romine, Scooter, and Astrubal Cabrera.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d hold

  50. dizzystpizzy says:
    (link)

    My god when is Doolittle coming back!? I haven’t even suffered from his absence game-wise. Actually my opponent lost a W last night thanks to Gregorson. I just want to see that bearded beauty every day back in my lineup.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Shortly

    • Toe Knee says:
      (link)

      @dizzystpizzy: They say tomm. if today went well. Nice to have for the weekend.

      • dizzystpizzy says:
        (link)

        @Toe Knee: Thanks for the info. Having him for the weekend is great, we can sleep in and cook crepes.

  51. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    I’m so happy that in 1 league i got Kluber,Kennys and Mauer who i picked up for extra abs locked on my bench yay.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That sucks

  52. baseball says:
    (link)

    Rank these streamers for sat and sun. Chase Anderson, Locke, Gallardo, hector Santiago. They were the top 4 according to streamonator that would be available in my league if needed in my h2h league.

    • baseball says:
      (link)

      @baseball: Salazar and Kyle Kendrick would also be available.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d look at SON

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        Anderson, but have no idea of matchups

  53. Schoolboy P says:
    (link)

    GAME NOTICE:
    We apologize for the incorrect lock time in the MIN/CLE game, and the frustration this has caused. The game locked due to an incorrect game time for the first game of the double-header, and unfortunately we are unable to unlock the game. We have corrected that error to ensure that it will not happen again. All games tomorrow will lock at the correct time.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      As said above — I figured they wouldn’t fix it… There would be a real revolt if they would’ve said, “We’re not doing anything.” Instead of “We’re trying.”

      • Montezuma's Revenge... right now says:
        (link)

        @Grey: same thing with officer wilson in ferguson. public calmed down when they thought enough national Democratic party representatives told them Wilson was “being investigated”. a much bigger riot could go down if/when Wilson gets only demoted to a different city and a desk job (not confinement or even loss of pay). If that happens it won’t just be street punks and north city people/outside inciters looting and burning stuff. the Average person is about to find out that it’s actually considered legal for a cop to shot an unarmed person in certain cases, even in broad daylight. It’s happened before in STL in last 15 years. Cops got off with nothing at all.

  54. J-FOH says:
    (link)

    Limposter! Who stole my diary cause that’s what I call my man parts…wait! What?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA!

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Limposter is a good one, it can flow in nicely. I’m not even going to throw in Invasion of the Body Snatchers or IBS for short. Besides I can find a better way to work IBS into my stuff. Or should I say work IBS out?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha… The Imposter is a great movie on Netflix, by the by

          • J-FOH says:
            (link)

            @Grey: wow, that looks cool. will add it to the que. sharing is caring

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Yeah, it’s amazing… Your turn…

              • J-FOH says:
                (link)

                @Grey: have you watched blood in blood outyet? You know that movie I gifted to you? If you say no then I have nothing to share

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Oh, don’t be like that

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: so you haven’t watched it yet

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      All summer I get about an hour of TV a night, writing the roundup from 7 to 9…I’ll watch it, it’s on my coffee table… Cougs prolly wants me to watch it so I can put it away…

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: I’m just busting your balls. When i did my five post week I was dead to the world. This shizz ain’t easy day in and day out. Cougs wants to see it because benji is like skinamax in that.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      She gets Benji dong?

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: shirtless and in a sling. I think pinero is the nude flick….why do I know these things!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Banana hammock? Thank god she’s too old to birth kids!

                    • Prez says:
                      (link)

                      @J-FOH: pinero was on the angels at one point, no? this explains alot..

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: sling is slang for a wife beater. It’s an old school term

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Oh, whew!

  55. JustanUncle says:
    (link)

    would you keep Polanco in a 6-keeper 12 man league?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Maybe, depend on options

      • Gator says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Polanco a better keeper than Bruce or A Gordon?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          No

  56. Gator says:
    (link)

    Not sure if knowing Pedroia played hurt helps his 2015 value by hoping he rebounds, or hurts it by confirming he’s had too many hand/wrist injuries to ever reach old levels. Wong over Pedroia for 2015? Is 15/30 too much to expect from Wong?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Wong

  57. J-Mo says:
    (link)

    Bogaerts or Baez ROS?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Xander

  58. Drexel Hill Dragons says:
    (link)

    Time to vent to those that will understand.
    I’m in the 2nd to last week of H2H playoffs (had a bye week last week as #1 seed)

    This season I’ve either lost or benched 4 of my 5 keepers
    (Jose Fernandez, Darvish, McCutchen, Tulo, Puig) Puig has been absolutely miserable the last few months. I’m currently losing to a far inferior team. He has Dioner Navarro at Catcher who has more steals than my entire team this week. While struggling with steals all season I actually set myself up in good position for the playoffs with Wong, Betts, Lagares and McCutchen all guys that should help there. Not this week – 0 steals.

    My best overall hitter this season – Jose Abreu has 0 runs, and 0 RBI in the past 2 weeks.
    Ugh. Fantasy Baseball. Why can’t I quit you?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha… I hear ya

    • goodfold2 says:
      (link)

      @Drexel Hill Dragons: i feel similar, didn’t know abreu was doing worse in last 2 weeks than gordon is in last 7 days. 1 hit/1 run/1rbi. i have 0 steals with mookie/harrison/jones/gordon/j.ramirez (added today)/mendy.

  59. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    Yan Gomes dong

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yes!

      • ERad says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        2 RBI double – crushing today

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Great start!

  60. Drexel Hill Dragons says:
    (link)

    Would you keep riding Lagares the rest of the week or switch to a hot De Aza (has a double-header tomorrow as well)?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Could see switching if you have room to platoon De Aza

  61. gg says:
    (link)

    in a keeper, would you hold Werth over Rios or Gardner at same price?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Nah

  62. Joeg414 says:
    (link)

    Need K’s and K’s /IP , but since i’m nearing an innings limit i’m looking at these RP: Tony Watson, Familia, L.Gregerson, Cecil, K.Herrea, S.Kelley or Carlos Martinez? Please pick the best three. Thanks. 6×6 daily roto.

    Never Forget 9/11

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Martinez, Kelley, Cecil

  63. These Ho's aint Loyal says:
    (link)

    Jordy Mercer, Brad Miller or Jed Lowrie? Who needs to be picked up out of those 3?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Mercer

  64. JeF With 1 F says:
    (link)

    Wigger

    • JeF With 1 F says:
      (link)

      @JeF With 1 F: no huh

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        @JeF With 1 F: What, as the term? Hmm… Prolly not

        • JeF With 1 F says:
          (link)

          @Grey: ha ha

  65. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    Any of these guys worth streaming tomm. for the dh Headley, Crispy, Tex, Pearce , De Aza, Flaherty, or Schoop. I’m leaning Pearce. Anyone you like tomm. on this list?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      De Aza, no idea of matchups

      • Toe Knee says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Its Yankees- Balt double header tomm. Gausman and norris vs McCarthy and tbd

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Oh, yeah, go De Aza

  66. Jay_0321 says:
    (link)

    GraySon!

    Drop Betts and grab Zandah? 5-5 tie surging for the finals!

  67. Long Bawls says:
    (link)

    Just doublechecked to confirm that Toronto isn’t playing Philadelphia for the remainder of the season. Phew! It could have been a disaster if Pompey came face to face with Asche.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA

  68. DJ says:
    (link)

    Would you drop Santana for Xander?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yes

  69. Steve Stevenson says:
    (link)

    Rockies at home for 7G next week, so I have a feeling HT’s going to get tingly in his sprockets. Would that have you adding Rutledge, LeMahieu and Stubbs for H2H semis over guys like Bogaerts, Betts and Soler? Shallow league , but limited moves (20/yr).

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Rut over Betts

  70. plugging holes at the ass-end of the fantasy season with guys who fellatethe top of the waiver wire after the playoff cuts. it’s a last dick i mean ditch effort and i could use a quick tip… all things being equal, laroche or xander to play in my UTIL for the rest of the season?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      LaRoche

  71. The Fifth Girl says:
    (link)

    It’s that “play who’s hot” time of year – glad to have Mercer and Loney, thanks for the tips. Batty’d Blanco yesterday and will hang on to him today. I like to catch this column along with other sources before I pick my handful of hitters to stream for the day. When there’s not time to read it all before roster moves, I come to this page and do a Find-in-Page for “schmotato”. :)

    I’m nowhere near creative enough to come up with things like Limposter and Fraction Jackson.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, you don’t have to be creative… You’re a girl, you win!

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @The Fifth Girl: hitter-tron is good in a pinch

    • The Fifth Girl says:
      (link)

      :) And HT is almost always one of my stops before I grab daily streamers.

  72. Chicken Dinner says:
    (link)

    May not be the most clever glossary word but is any song more fitting for Pedroia than Creep ?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      STP?

      • Chicken Dinner says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Indeed. “Take time with the wounded hand, cuz it likes to heal.” Also, “I’m half the man I used to be.”

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

        • goodfold2 says:
          (link)

          @Chicken Dinner: they knew who they were writing that song about all those years ago.

  73. Corey says:
    (link)

    Streamonator likes Lohse tomorrow vs Reds/Latos. He has also not gone more than 6 innings in his last 8 starts. I only have one player add left and of the remaining available SPs for the weekend, Lohse has the highest $ value… But I need a QS!

    • Corey says:
      (link)

      Oh, the question: Do you agree with the Streamonator or have any other recommendations for a streamer who can net me a QS and W?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d start Latos

      • Corey says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Sorry, I’ll rephrase: I don’t own Latos. Lohse is on the wire and I could add him for his start VERSUS Latos.

        I am now trying to decide between streaming Lohse (vs Reds) or Nuno (vs Padres). Need a W and QS.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Nuno

          • Corey says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Thanks. I like that pick. Added.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              No problem

  74. Shoe Gum Reynolds says:
    (link)

    RE: “hatehatehate!!! — that you can’t replace a player in a game that’s been postponed after the start time”

    Yeah what’s with the lame programmers of these game sites like CBS, Yahoo, ESPN? Do they even play the game? A player should not be locked for a scoring period until 5 minutes before HIS team’s first game of the period…NOT 5 minutes before the effing Cubs noon game on Monday. Nonsense….poor system design…..bad programming.

    Anywho…I sent this in as an improvement idea to CBS (sans the programmer insults). I’m not holding my breath. But, I bet the first site that fixes this problem will steal away a slew of customers from their competitors.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Someone above mentioned above that CBS does this already

      • Shoe Gum Reynolds says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Must be only in H2H. The weekly game locks lineups for the week, 5 minutes before the first scheduled MLB game of the scoring period. That is…..unless our ruthless Commissioner is hoarding this feature all to himself!!!!

        Any weekly CBS players know if you can get around the system locking lineups x-minutes before the first MLB scheduled game of scoring period”?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          My keeper is CBS and it doesn’t even tell what guys are in the lineup and locks at the start of play for every team, which is a nightmare…

    • Hot Rod

      Jimmy says:
      (link)

      @Shoe Gum Reynolds: probably the same programming geniuses that set today’s second CLE-MIN game in the doubleheader as a 12am start, instantly locking roster moves and adds etc before the morning.

      • Hot Rod

        Jimmy says:
        (link)

        @Jimmy: ESPN, that is

  75. Swfcdan says:
    (link)

    Ok maybe I made the post a little too big above, and you missed the question. Here it is again:

    Needing a miracle, should I keep rolling Bruce out there in a hope of a true one that he actually homers, or should I say f you Bruce never drafting you again and play one of these shmos at Util instead:

    Philipps, Headley, Bourn, Kiermaier, Beltran (all have been cold)

    So Bruce or one of those guys?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Bruce

  76. J-FOH says:
    (link)

    Avisail with two stolen bases in two days, this is better than when they had free slurpee day at 7-11

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I don’t know, that was a good day… Expect when they ran out at 2 PM and said could have a cylindrical hamburger instead

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Grey: mine was an easy in and out

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          It’s easy to get confused which side it goes in

          • J-FOH says:
            (link)

            @Grey: are we still talking about slurpees or are we into finger cuffs?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Cylindrical hamburgers

              • J-FOH says:
                (link)

                @Grey: like a stack of sliders?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Like a doodie stick

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: like a kafka kabob

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Yes, exactly! Goes in, same as it goes out

  77. Mello Yello says:
    (link)

    Buchholz in KC…I’m feeling frisky man!…perhaps too much frisk for my own benefit, but it’s the playoffs, and you gotta let your balls hang out like that…

    Playlist Of The Week:

    1. No Sugar Tonight – The Guess Who
    2. Help Me Lose My Mind – Disclosure
    3. Cherub Rock – Smashing Pumpkins
    4. F’d Up – Lil’ Wyte
    5. Touched – UGK

    *Bonus Track* Satan’s Gotta Get Along Without Me – Buck Owens

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      How is Cherub Rock not Altuve’s coming to bat song?

    • nick the dick says:
      (link)

      @Mello Yello: no way you just said touched bu ugk. I kid you not, i was just singing that today thinking god damn you jayz for stealing that whole first part of Bun Bs verse. What a fantastic album, i suggested a song off that when J Foh threw some of my video picks in his post

  78. JW says:
    (link)

    I have to keep two of these dbags. So which two do you think will have the best 2015: Taveras, Profar, Soler, Baez, Polanco?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Polanco, Soler

  79. Wilson says:
    (link)

    Hi Grey,

    MI options: Rank Mercer, Alexei, Dozier. Danny for ROS
    CI Options: Rank Vargas, Seager, Duda for ROS
    OF options: Rank Werth, Bruce, Arcia for ROS

    Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Dozier… Seager… Werth

  80. sniff test says:
    (link)

    Doolittle coming of dl. I can have 3 RP and mine are currently Rosenthal, Casilla and Storen. Do I drop any of these for Doolittle or let Doolittle hit the scrap. 10 days left of season.

    • Toe Knee says:
      (link)

      @sniff test: Casilla is co-closer with Romo

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @Toe Knee: romo has yet to cut into casilla’s save opps.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Lose Doolittle

  81. Phil of the Future says:
    (link)

    How about Crappelganger? A crappy doppelganger. Not sure if it’s good enough for the glossary but I do like it. Whatcha think G?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I like limposter better

      • Phil of the Future says:
        (link)

        @Grey: I thought you were my friend

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          But we are!

          • Phil of the Future says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Forever?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Yes, please!

              • Prez says:
                (link)

                teared up a little right there guys…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  This is all for you!

  82. Pete says:
    (link)

    Who do you like better next week?
    Worley v Boston ($6.3)
    or
    Peralta @ STL ($-1.1)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Worley

  83. Tracy says:
    (link)

    I was holding my own until Iwakuma cost me the lead in WHIP and QS last night and now I need to stream just to have a chance.

    I am going with Nuno as my best option for Friday, but could use some help for Saturday and Sunday. Below are my options with the opponent and SON value. Could you please help me rank them as some may get taken and I might have to stream more than one each day.

    Saturday
    C Anderson, ARI vs SD, $10.5
    M Gonzalez, BAL vs NYY, $ -2.4
    J Nelson, MIL vs CIN, $11.3
    J Locke, PIT vs CHN, $8.6

    Sunday
    H Santiago, LAA vs HOU, $9.4
    E Volquez, PIT vs CHN, $8.2
    D Holland, TX vs ATL, $11.7

    I’ll owe you a drink if this works out, and thank you in advance for the assistance.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Anderson, Miguel, Locke…. Edinson, Hector

      • Tracy says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Thanks, and let’s hope we are both drinking on me at the end of the week.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yup!

  84. Joe says:
    (link)

    Grey should i start tanner roark against the mets today? Iam in the playoffs i need an advice

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’m starting him

  85. gg says:
    (link)

    Dr. Grey, do you think Pedroia’s injury lingers into next year? still a keeper?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I think it lingers

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @Grey: damn, that’ll have been two whole years if so.

  86. Red Riv Rev says:
    (link)

    Which four would you keep (can be kept any number of years)?

    A Wood
    J Paxton
    M Fiers
    T Walker
    G Richards

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Not Walker

  87. Prez says:
    (link)

    its sept 11.. 9th place is the world trade towers.. and im the planes!!!

    too soon? i didnt think so either… ill be sure to put my stats from every player here so cram can watch and cheer. its what he lives for.. cheering for teams that he doesnt own or like…

    thanks for the peavy persuasion, btw…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @Prez: cram is a sweetheart

      • Prez says:
        (link)

        @J-FOH: hes starting to become more sarcastic than grey himself… its pretty fun to watch!

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @Prez: he’s diversified his hate portfolio

          • Prez says:
            (link)

            @J-FOH: that thing must be as long as madams’ food phonebook…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Twice, once under burger, 2nd under dookie…

    • Prez says:
      (link)

      mini jinx on peavy.. i thought it was all clear.. sorry folks..

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        Thanks!

  88. Prez says:
    (link)

    david murphy went 2/3.. yes, i batty called david murphy.. awesome meter = broken

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That’s not bad, Prezzii, don’t be so hard on yourself!

      • Prez says:
        (link)

        @Grey: i was actually tootin my own horn.. i meant i broke the meter becuz im so awesome! 2/3 from david murphy is golden!

        i get it.. ur just use to me being humble…

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @Prez: humblesnatch

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Ah, see you flipped a U-ey on common perception…

          • Prez says:
            (link)

            @Grey: its one of my favorite things to do…

  89. Eddie says:
    (link)

    Should I keep:

    Rizzo (7th round)
    or
    Rendon (20th round)

    I’m already keeping Abreu in the 8th round.
    Other options are:

    A-Jones (3rd)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Jones

  90. Dez says:
    (link)

    Better stream tomorrow? H2H Points League

    De La Rosa @ Stl
    Wada @ Pit
    Gausman vs NYY
    Happ vs TB

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Wada

  91. nick the dick says:
    (link)

    Hip Hop Line Of The Day:

    While you cut school cause you ain’t feel too good,
    I cut school cuz my cuts ain’t heal too good,
    Through all the physical abuse,
    My mind escaped through the gift of wordplay,
    I memorized encyclopedias and dictionaries,
    I wrote anthems from antonyms,
    Harmonies from homonyms,
    Created cinema from synonyms,
    Was livid to eliminate that illustrious life you’re living in,
    Wrote rhetoricals in rhythms,
    I could paralyze with a parable,
    Make rhymes out of religion,
    Crucify you with a prefix,
    Or suffocate you with a suffix,
    Wrote lectures so infectious,
    They’re known to infect the listeners,
    Who dissing us,
    Yo punks you wait, I punctuate,
    My karma’s the comma,
    That put you inside of a coma,
    Hyphen, dot dot, semi-colon,
    Leave you semi-swollen,
    Question mark, You pregnant?,
    Oh you’re not, I love you, Period,
    To sum it up, language is my essence,
    Fucked up in all my adolescence,
    Till my moms was out of lessons,
    Laws, I store convenient,
    Still I rob a convenience store,
    Love Mom, fuck mom shit, I don’t love me no more,
    Mentally it didn’t register, bitch,
    Empty the register, bitch,
    You just a cashier, bitch,
    Give the cash here,
    Or I’ll shoot you in your cabbage,
    Hijack a getaway cab, bitch,
    Words ain’t making me no loot,
    Don’t change now Dow Jones average,
    Regardless, we’re Godless,
    They stole my innocence,
    In a sense, the judge sentenced me,
    To three lifetime sentences,
    To write my life and times in sentences,
    Art my dark archnemesis,
    They want me off the premises, that’s what the premise is,
    Locked on a tier where you can’t shed a tear at,
    I studied more Shakespeare than any African shakes a spear at,
    And the whole world fears that, and it hurts,
    I got caught killing time but then I got away with words

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      No idea, but love that midsection

      • Prez says:
        (link)

        @Grey: thats what she said!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I actually realize why I said that about Murph-Dawg… He didn’t start the first game… You deserved more, prezzii!

          • Prez says:
            (link)

            @Grey: i know right?? he should have started both games! oh well, ill take it… it is after all, david murphy.. 2/3 could have gone to 2/7 real quick..

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Or 5/7, dream big Prezii, Matt Adams big

              • Prez says:
                (link)

                @Grey: then nobody will crush my dreams…. my dreams will crush me!

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  I say fall backwards into your dream like it’s one of those plastic ball pens at a fancy McDonald’s…

                  • Prez says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: sounds about right… fall back onto ur dreams and end up with food in ur pants and smelling like piss…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Haha

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Ah, very nice…

          • nick the dick says:
            (link)

            @Grey: ill be looking forward to your post written all in homonyms

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Haha, I just may

              • nick the dick says:
                (link)

                @Grey: hes got another pretty cool one thats all oxymorons

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  What’s the name of the song so I can check it out?

        • Prez says:
          (link)

          @nick the dick: my bad yo! tke it from here!

          *backs away slowly*

          • nick the dick says:
            (link)

            @Prez: nope, come back. Now we’re gonna have to battle.

  92. JJ says:
    (link)

    In a dogfight in the playoffs in my H2H league
    Would you drop N.FELIZ for
    D.STOREN
    K.QUACKENBUSH
    Would you drop T.HUNTER or A.RAMIREZ for
    K.VARGAS
    K.DAVIS
    A.GARCIA
    M.ADAMS
    D.ACKLEY

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Storen… Aramis for Avisail

  93. Prez says:
    (link)

    hip hop line of the day:

    I bet you sleep with a night lighttttt,
    cuz ur scared of the dark!
    n you stink like a fart!
    well, ill light ur fart on fire with my ryhmessssssssss..
    you think i wont? i do it all the time..
    i betcha i got more money than jay-z…
    compared to me, jay-z is lazy..
    plus, beyonce thinks that im cute..
    its okay beyonce, i think ur cute too!

    -legend

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That shizz is Froggy fresh…

      • Prez says:
        (link)

        @Grey: hahahahah! guy is comedy…

    • nick the dick says:
      (link)

      @Prez: i almost went with that too. Way to steal my thunder cuz!

      • Prez says:
        (link)

        @nick the dick: nope, you already kicked me out..

        • nick the dick says:
          (link)

          @Prez: haha no you wanna be where everyone knows your name! Mark busta ha. If youre too busy drawing up designs for those sweaters just say so.

  94. confucious says:
    (link)

    hey grey,

    who do you want ros? juan lagares or aj pollock?

    thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Lagares

  95. Crazy old guy babbling in the corner says:
    (link)

    Holland or Nuno as a streamer? I’m leaning Holland cause he’s been so good lately, but streamonator likes nuno…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Nuno

  96. Streamonator has Garrza ranked 4th on Sunday. You buying that? My other options are [email protected] TOR (Stroman), Gallardo vs CIN (Axelrod) – Streamonator has him ranked 4th Saturday, or McCarthy @ BAL (Gausman), or I suppose Gausman vs McCarthy. Leaning toward Garza. Hopefully he has built up his stamina. Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Forget Garza…. I’d go Nuno

      • @Grey: Locke has a tasty matchup against the Cubs in PIT Against Doubront also. Nuno over Locke? Thanks Grey!!!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I’d lean Nuno, but can’t go wrong with either

  97. Hondo says:
    (link)

    It looks like Molina is toast.
    d’Arnaud.Martin,Navarro or Flowers for weeks 24 -25?
    Havent checked the matchups or stadiums yet.

    I’m off this week,so no hurry.

    12 team,1 catcher 5×5 league.

    d’Arnaud just made a horrible base running mistake.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d wait until Sunday if you’re off this week

      • Hondo says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Good advice as always,thanks.Will do.I’ve got four moves left and want to use 2 to pickup a couple 2 start pitchers.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Gotcha

  98. SteveNZ says:
    (link)

    Colon is ruining my FCL dream!

    • Hondo says:
      (link)

      @SteveNZ: Helping my Nats though.

      • Hondo says:
        (link)

        @Hondo: Ejected after hitting the 2 batters who he HBP after the previous batter donged.

        • SteveNZ says:
          (link)

          @Hondo: Good. He can’t do any more damage.

          • Hondo says:
            (link)

            @SteveNZ: He was lucky Werth didn’t do any to him.He was thinking about,but he’s too smart.

        • Hot Rod

          Jimmy says:
          (link)

          @Hondo: it is the first and hopefully last time I ever google “colon ejected”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Are the standings that close?

      • SteveNZ says:
        (link)

        @Grey: They are now.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Damn

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @SteveNZ: quit your belly aching, Ive been looking up everyone’s skirt all year while you have been cruising at the top for most of it

      • SteveNZ says:
        (link)

        @J-FOH: Whining is what I do.

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @SteveNZ: I thought that said winning at first, then i thought maybe your british blue was typing…then I actually read it

        • Prez says:
          (link)

          @SteveNZ: i almost want to stop trying again, so you can get what you deserve.. but then i look t the people ahead of me in the standings and mutter “aah fuck steve..”..

  99. Henry says:
    (link)

    Blanco or Xander ROS?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Xander

  100. jef with 1 f says:
    (link)

    My prediction….PAIN

  101. J-FOH says:
    (link)

    Encore Black just showed Different Strokes and is now going to 227 followed by Amen before finishing with What’s Happening…cust kayin’

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      No…That’s WHAT’S HAPPPENING!

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Grey: MY BAD! It’s like a childhood black christmas on my TV, Tyler Perry should come take some notes

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

  102. goodfold2 says:
    (link)

    with that braun homer i’m only up 6 bases (started day up 17), somehow with excellent pitching (not something i’ve had nearly ever in this team) i’m winning barely. only categories that can probably be locked up is my 4 homer lead, and opp’s 78 pt in average lead, maybe his 9 lead in hits. I grab J.Ramirez for steals only to watch Bourn get 3 runs and a steal (only his 10th of year). down 4 runs now. RBI’s tied. so still no steals from mookie/jones/gordon/ramirez/harrison, down 0-1. i have tie breaker and opp’s team is one of worst all year in steals, so 1 or 2 might be enough to at least tie week. Gordon now has 1 hit/1 rbi/1 run in last 7 days. Sucks to go out to this opp (any future opp wouldn’t so much, as they actually have better teams than me)

    • goodfold2 says:
      (link)

      @goodfold2: Cobb and Fiers are making WHIP/ERA fall like a bad bag of dope (Tehol’s line), that’s good. still have to go against kershaw again.

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @goodfold2: looks like i should’ve grabbed alcides instead of ramirez, but alcides’s steals went down in 2nd half, and he hits in crappy part of order. hope i don’t go out by exactly 1 steal due to that choice, vs this opp.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      There’s still time…

  103. goodfold2 says:
    (link)

    BOS keeping this lead would be nice for save purposes, i’m losing saves by 1, and opp has wade, i have mujica.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Still time

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @Grey: time i didn’t want, so far. STEAL BETTS STEAL!

  104. goodfold2 says:
    (link)

    wow, even my opp’s freese is actually decent in SEPT. he just grabbed him to replace pedro.losing RBI’s with that.

  105. Mr. Tibbs says:
    (link)

    Alex Cobb no-no broke up by…. wait for it….
    Krispie Young?

    • jef with 1 f says:
      (link)

      @Mr. Tibbs: hate him

      • Mr. Tibbs says:
        (link)

        @jef with 1 f: Agree. Then Boxberger serves up a 2-run homer (or dong if you prefer) to Prado. Not too happy with this turn of events.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha

  106. Bruce says:
    (link)

    would you stream Flaherty or Schoop as a MI for tomorrow? orioles yanks doubleheader…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Schoop

      • Bruce says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        thanks grey.

        I need runs and hits and every little bit helps

  107. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    Giancarlo plunked in the head. Ambulance cart out.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Noooooo

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @Grey: this shit ain’t good. my all star in 20 team dynasty, don’t know if i’ll make it through 2nd round without him next week. that’s assuming he’s good for next year.

      • Toe Knee says:
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        @Grey: Took him off in a stretcher bloody mess. A wait n see never lost consciousness .

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ugh

          • Toe Knee says:
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            @Grey: After replays he swung at it hit him square in the face right in the cheek. 89mph fastball. he was actually called out after all this swinging strike.

            • Sky

              Sky says:
              (link)

              My soul just got ripped out through my asshole…and yet I feel nothing now…nothing…

              • Grey

                Grey says:
                (link)

                Hold me

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              I watched…It’s hard to see through my tears

              • J-FOH says:
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                @Grey: ill be over to cradle you to sleep later. You can weep on my collar

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  I need emotional support!

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: mani pedi spa day with ted tomorrow?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      We both need it

                    • goodfold2 says:
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                      @J-FOH: him not losing consciousness is probably very good in these instances. Plus where it hit him is much more likely to be jaw/cheekbone injury (not good, but not brain related is) than brain one. Still almost certainly ends this season though. Just hope he’s able to be the same next year.

        • Bye Felicia says:
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          @Toe Knee: F U FIERS! Stanton is more than likely done for the season…. now I’m fked!

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Damn

    • Hondo says:
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      @Toe Knee: Oh crap.

    • nick the dick says:
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      @Toe Knee: ahhhh fuckshitassbitchcuntshoobadydoowop

  108. nick the dick says:
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    Coming thru Krispie!!

  109. goodfold2 says:
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    jesus, crispy young might be my undoing too, stealing cobb’s win. wow.

  110. henncoop says:
    (link)

    Stanton looked a mess. They had to get the grounds crew out to clean up all the blood & resurface the batting box. Then adding insult to injury it was a called strike since he swung as he got hit by the pitch.
    So then a pinch hitter gets called in to finish the AB & gets hit on the 1st pitch to him but is called out as he also swung. Both benches emptied & 2 Marlins get ejected. Fiers looks visibly shaken & have to wonder is he will be worth holding on to the rest of the year.
    Never seen anything like this …2 batters hit in what is one at bat resulting in a K for Fiers

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Agreed, ugly scene

      • henncoop says:
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        @Grey: To make it even more horrific Stanton’s dad & aunt are sitting in the 1st row to witness the event. Has to be a helpless feeling as a father to see that happen to your son.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ouch

        • Toe Knee says:
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          @henncoop: Watching that live i’m having a problem turning baseball back on.

    • SteveNZ says:
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      @henncoop: Yeah, you could tell as soon as it happened that Fiers was pretty upset about it.

  111. Donald Trump says:
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    I guess we won’t be hearing “only -3 to go”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      He was at -1

  112. Donald Trump says:
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    What? Too soon?

  113. nick the dick says:
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    Stanton, Headley, Trout, Cargo, Werth, Cutch thrown at.. eveyone is getting beaned tonight what the hell is going on?

  114. nick the dick says:
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    Shut the site down, pack it up…theres nothing left without Gianny. We can only handle so much.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I’m sad

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Grey:I’m heartbroken. I will now remeber 9/11 for a different reason

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Me too!

  115. Prez says:
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    *que funeral music*

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Is that a dirge? Doesn’t Mac Dre have anything apropos?

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Grey: He would suggest pop some thizz and bang a hoe to get over it i’m sure

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha

      • Prez says:
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        @Grey: HAA! my apoligies…

  116. J-FOH says:
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    I feel for you grey. But im fighting steve for that FCL championship belt. I have to be ok with Giancarlo going down. Again im sorry.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      You’re not fighting Steve, c’mon

      • SteveNZ says:
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        @Grey: No one cares about us, Grey. I have him on three teams. THREE.

        Including my H2H team which starts a semi next week….

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I have him as a keeper…Going on 5 years with him… 5!

          • SteveNZ says:
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            @Grey: Same! I grabbed him when he came up in the Hippo/Al K keeper.

            • goodfold2 says:
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              @SteveNZ: 20 team dynasty (about to go to 2nd round, killing a guy this week), 14 team dynasty (where i’m out of it, having joined in late june), no redrafts. wow, only 2 leagues. seems like more how important that dude is to that 20 teamer.

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: 5 points down. Dont be hating

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Wow, you made a huge comeback

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: thats what she said

  117. J-FOH says:
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    He should of never changed his name.

    • SteveNZ says:
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      @J-FOH: Couldn’t agree more.

    • nick the dick says:
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      @J-FOH: I could agree more if you used proper fucking grammar! Its should’ve, not should of! Should of is nothing! Ahh geez im sorry, this Stanton thing just has me in a tizzy. It’s not your fault, i’m just lashing out…

      • J-FOH says:
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        @nick the dick: really? the hip hop guy is questioning grammar? You should’ve just gone back into the fetal position

        • nick the dick says:
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          @J-FOH: hip hop and grammar. My two loves, just ahead of all the typical things people care about.

          • nick the dick says:
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            @nick the dick: and fyi, I always use correct grammar in rhymes and I am also still in the fetal position.

            • J-FOH says:
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              @nick the dick: my phone doesn’t like contractions and neither did my english professor

              • nick the dick says:
                (link)

                @J-FOH: hey i’m as cool with stretching it out to the classic ‘should have’. Gotta love a good compromise!

                • J-FOH says:
                  (link)

                  @nick the dick: I’ll add you to the list of grammar hammers around here….dorks

                  • nick the dick says:
                    (link)

                    @J-FOH: Thanks. We are a proud people.

                  • nick the dick says:
                    (link)

                    @J-FOH: serious note. 1, what was the name of that DJ or whatever you schooled me on the other day? Liked that stuff…2, lemme tell you how upset I am that I didnt get an invite to go with my boy who I went to Rugged with to go to NY and see a Cut Chemist and DJ Shadow show a few days ago where they used all Afrika Bambaataas records. He said it was dope.

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @J-FOH: cool, good shizz

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @nick the dick: I just came across the underachievers, you heard?

                  • nick the dick says:
                    (link)

                    @J-FOH: I havent, any good?

  118. gg says:
    (link)

    probably too soon, but Stanton owner is in the playoffs and was KO’d in week 1. no trade deadline, so I could probably deal to pick him up as a keeper. albeit poor taste, is this something you’d do?

    • nick the dick says:
      (link)

      @gg: Do it. Carry his name on, as he is in our hearts forever.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sure

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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      @gg: i don’t understand the poor taste, if you’ll ever have a buy low (and hopefully you’ll never have another one) this is it. Poor taste would be trying to trade away Stanton to somebody who is very ignorant about news.

  119. Toe Knee says:
    (link)

    turned the game back on Ozuna hits dong.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yup

  120. henncoop says:
    (link)

    Impressive …..pretty compact easy swing. Will he still be a “sleeper” type for next year???

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      People don’t know about him?

  121. Shark says:
    (link)

    Can only pick up one of these pitchers…need the most K’s, who do I go with? Thanks!

    Nuno
    Quintana
    Anderson
    Volquez
    Garza

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
      (link)

      @Shark: i’m assuming you mean for their next starts, if so, SON says Garza/Quintana/Anderson, in that order, only Nuno projects at less than 5 for their next starts. I’d dodge Garza though personally, if you want any thing other than K’s that is.

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
        (link)

        @Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: Garza’s projected K’s is 5.9. other two i listed are 5.7, 5.5.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Nuno

  122. FillyP says:
    (link)

    12t 7×7 H2H keeper (OBP/XBH + QS/IP)

    Need some late night advice.. my opponent and I each have one move left for the week. Should I..?

    Here’s our current matchup: http://i.imgur.com/iNWZRwo.jpg?1
    (I’m Cole’s)

    1) Drop Roark or Odorizzi for a spot start.. I have 5 starts left, dude has 7.
    Nuno vs SD (9/12)
    Verlander vs Cle (9/14)
    Cahill vs SD (9/14)

    2) Drop Roark or Odorizzi for an RP.. available: Storen, Davis, Petricka, Mujica, Perkins, Doolittle, Janssen..

    3) Pick up some offense.. (Valbuena, Wong, or Bruce would be a drop) .. Blanco, Lagares, McCann, Crawford, Pagan, De Aza, Viciedo, Odor, Panik, Taveras, Lowrie, Prado, Freese, C. Young, Cron, Pollock, Arcia..

    4) Hold, pray to the fantasy gods, and pick up Strasburg on Sunday if I somehow make it out of this semi-finals matchup alive…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I don’t look at links… 1) Sure, Nuno 2) Sure, Storen 3) Valbuena for De Aza

      • FillyP says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Um, ok. Question kind of needs context.. I’m winning my semis 7-6. Here’s the breakdown (I’m the first number) –

        R
        15
        19

        HR
        3
        3

        RBI
        15
        17

        SB
        2
        4

        AVG
        .188
        .243

        OBP
        .229
        .345

        XBH
        11
        10

        IP
        38.0
        29.2

        W
        5
        2

        SV
        1
        0

        K
        33
        35

        ERA
        1.66
        3.34

        WHIP
        1.00
        1.28

        QS
        4
        2

  123. henncoop says:
    (link)

    Fiers looked an emotional wreck post game interview …near tears. Any chance he had Stanton on his fantasy team?
    But seriously have to wonder how well he is able to move past this for the rest of his season.

    So far the only word I hear is Stanton has a facial laceration & will staying behind in Milwaukee in a local hospital.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’m sure Fiers will be fine

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
      (link)

      @henncoop: who knows, maybe Fiers has him on more teams than some of us do.

  124. Steve Stevenson says:
    (link)

    On bye this week, but assuming the news on Giancarlo is bad, which OF do I grab for next week? 9 moves left this yr.

    Betts
    Soler
    Stubbs (7G in Coors)
    Crawford (3G in Coors)
    Lagares
    Blanco

    TB, BB, K, NetSB count. If I go with a speed guy I may also grab a LaRoche to plug in at Util (over Dozier) for some power.

  125. Hondo says:
    (link)

    I blame Selig for this and ISIS.

    Please Mr.President,order airstrikes on Milwaukee.

    Nothing good has ever come from there.Even the beer sux.

  126. Hondo says:
    (link)

    Multiple facial fractures and dental damage.

    • Abdoozy says:
      (link)

      @Hondo: OMG HIS FACE HIS BEAUTIFUL FACE

  127. Andre says:
    (link)

    On a bye this week…assuming Stanton in done for the year who do I grab to fill the outfield spot? Hitting categories are H, Runs, HR, RBI, Steals, and Avg…only have 12 moves left on the year

    Gattis, Lageres, Pollock, Josh Hamilton, Myers, Trumbo, Cuddyer, Gardner or K. Davis?

    Thanks!

  128. Hondo says:
    (link)

    I actually(seriously) teared a up little over this.The calmness and dignity of his Father was impressive.

    • Hondo says:
      (link)

      @Hondo: *meant teared up a little*

  129. Abdoozy says:
    (link)

    I’m finally out of my fetal position, time to get practical. I’m tied up entering the last weekend of the semifinals and can’t afford a mourning period.

    Big problem is whether they put GS on the DL soon enough for it to matter for those of us in the playoffs. Ironically, since Stanton isn’t droppable in ESPN (at least not in my league) I had to drop Fiers to make room for a OF replacement as I don’t carry bench bats (I picked up De Aza, he has a SON-favorable matchup this weekend). Can’t afford to drop any other P as I’m either using them the next 2 days or I don’t want my opponent snatching them off waivers for Sunday (Petit). Fiers’ next outing is @STL and I doubt I’d be starting him there anyway, knowing how The Best Fans In Baseball can be so welcoming to a P in his situation…

    So, one bad pitch puts a dent in both batting and pitching. FMFBBL

    • The Harrow says:
      (link)

      @Abdoozy: this time of year nobody has any reason to DL anybody. If they do, you can bet Stanton is on the owner’s kid’s team, or maybe the owner’s fantasy team, no other reason to even process the paperwork. i’m in the same boat, absolutely murdering a guy but next week up against better team in semi finals. dynasty can’t drop him.

      • Abdoozy says:
        (link)

        @The Harrow: lol yeah. Fortunately ESPN has made him droppable, so it’s a moot point.

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