Is the title anti-Italian discrimination? Lucky I didn’t go with Whop, Whop, That’s How You Drive A Rig-A-Tony. It’s whop as in making a loud blow, like a homer! Hey, I’m half-Italian, I can’t be discriminatory. You can tell I’m half-Italian because I can be loud about absolutely nothing. If I mention Tony Soprano and you don’t do the stations of the cross, I can’t trust you. Taken too soon. *crosses self, kisses hand* I can’t wait for the prequel, that’s got ugatz on nothing not for nothing. Anthony Santander, vaffanculo, where’s this guy been? Anthony, you should be so good, what happened to you? You upset me, you know that? Yesterday, Santander went 2-for-4 with his 8th and 9th homer, as he hits .245. You kiss your mother with those stats? His Launch Angle came down this year, unlike the price of gabagool. It’s brought down his fly balls. *grabs balls* What’s it to ya? His HR/FB% is in the basement with my old Z. Cavaricci pants. He looks like he split his great, although short, 2020 season and his just okay 2019. Yesterday might’ve been the start of hot streak, like this blond going through my rat tail, but his numbers look fairly mediocre, unlike the sleeper he was coming into the year. Unless he can drive through the ball like a Fiat, and Fix It Again, Tony. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Please see our player page for Shane Greene to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
Oh, the Dirty South! After breaking down some lackluster NL West teams in my first three previews, we finally get a legitimate contender in the Braves. After posting an impressive 97-win season last year, this club looks fully ready to rock-and-roll again behind Ronald Acuna Jr. This dude has established himself as one of the best players in the Majors and it’s scary just how good this order looks with him up top. The one thing they need to clean up is their mascot game though.
The 2020 Razzball Commenter Leagues are now open! Free to join!Please, blog, may I have some more?
I regret to inform you, my fantasy friends, that even fake jedi get the flu. That’s right, Roto-Wan is coming to you today from a Sudafed laced haze that would make Jesse Pinkman proud. Stop interrupting me pink elephant, I’m trying to get a preamble together here. At any rate, we’ve reached the NL in our bullpen previews. Let’s kick it off with the very in flux NL East. My advice is to exercise even more caution with these names than we usually do.
NL East | NL Central | NL WestPlease, blog, may I have some more?
Tommy Edman continued his hot hitting Friday night going 2-for-4 with his sixth and seventh home runs and 3 RBI. Have a day, rook! He’s now batting .344 with 8 runs, 2 home runs, 4 RBI and two steals in the past week. *Pro tip* that will help your fantasy team! Tommy Boy struggled a bit to adjust after his initial call up but he hit .308 in August and seems to be have locked down the starting third baseman job in St. Louis. The Cardinals sit atop the NL Central with a 2.5 game lead and Edman could be a big reason why. Of the Cards starters, only Kolten Wong is hitting for a higher average and that could be the craziest sentence I’ve written all season. Did I mention that one of Edman’s shots pegged a Pittsburgh fan right in the groin? Lol! Take that you smug, yinzer! So pleased with yourselves regarding all this Antonio Brown drama. Smh. A home run ball right in the crotch should take you down a few pegs. So, are you convinced yet? Edman steals bases, he hits dingers, he’s eligible at multiple positions, he hits for average and he even knows how to stick it to Steelers nation. Did I mention he has a three game series at Coors starting on Tuesday? Yes, please! I’d add Edman everywhere I needed some speed with some pop and he could be a good addition to any team who’s in need of a solid bat for the rest of the season.
Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
A reporter, ducked behind chairs, yells at Aaron Sanchez at his no-hitter, post-game press conference. All we hear is the reporter’s disembodied voice, “Isn’t it true your four-seam spin rate went from 2,300 rpm to 2,565 rpm overnight?” Some reporters move out of the way for the reporter, who is crouched behind the chairs. One reporter recognizes him, asking, “Trevor Bauer, is that you?” What are the Astros feeding their pitchers? Pine tar and they’re being told to eat with their hands. Aaron Sanchez (6 IP, 0 ER, 0 hits, 2 walks, 6 Ks, ERA at 5.76) had a 6.07 ERA before this game! I get it, it was the Mariners, but this is crazy. Sanchez wasn’t usable at all in Toronto. The Astros’ coaching vs. cheating argument: Sanchez did kibosh his sinker, which was by far his worst pitch. Could it have been that easy? How could the Jays not figure this out? I could’ve figured this out! I guess Sanchez’s worth the flier. If he’s fixed, he’s too valuable to ignore. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
MLB teams were whistling 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover yesterday:
Just slip out the back, Zac, make a new plan, Tanner,
Don’t need to be coy, Greek God of Hard Contact, just listen to me,
Hop on the bus, Jesus, don’t need to discuss much,
Just drop off the key, Greinke, and get yourself free.
The deadline seemed to be lulling people to sleep, then the Diamondbacks stepped up and decided they were contenders, be-bopping Jazz Chisholm to the Marlins for Zac Gallen. But it turned out they were Indiana Jones, when he would replace an ancient artifact with a sand bag by switching one Zack with another Zac, so the booby trap wouldn’t expose them to trouble. See, and I always thought the idea of the outfield hot tub was to expose booby traps. Incredibly, the Cardinals announced the Zack Greinke to Astros deal hours before the Diamondbacks. The Astros rotation is now, as they would’ve said in the 20’s, bona fide. In good spirits, Justin Verlander tweeted out, “As long as we don’t get Bauer, we good.” I hear that, JV. I don’t trust home/away splits much at all, unless it’s Coors vs. non-Coors, but, if you must know 2.96 home ERA vs. 2.80 away. Usually it’s the inverse, but Greinke is a 15-year vet; you really think he’s going to pitch that differently in Houston? The answer you’re looking for is no. He’s a control artist whiz like you’d want from your child when they’re doing the pee-pee dance. Speaking of which, did every team relieve themselves of their relievers? Let’s find out! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Trade deadline is fast approaching Wednesday, July 31, at 4 PM ET. There is no waiver deadline this year, so, the next few days could contain a number of closer changes. It’s time to take your shots on potential closer changes and see what happens.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Cavan Biggio will be promoted today to join Vladimir Guerrero Jr. Soon, Bichette will join Guerrero and Biggio and the Jays’ master plan to reunite the 2005 All-Star Game in the luxury boxes will be complete. “How’s Darin Erstad Jr. look?” “More like Darin Ersatz!” “I don’t get it.” “Ersatz means an inferior substitute.” “Is that some thinking man’s humor? I don’t like that.” That was overheard in the Jays’ front office. Here’s what Prospect Mike said about Biggio this preseason, “At 23, Biggio had a solid 2018 campaign at Double-A. He hit .252 with 26 homers, 20 steals, and a walk rate of nearly 18%. He has the pedigree and patience to make it in the pros and the power to hit 20-25 homers, but he also strikes out a lot and I’m not sure what position he’ll end up at. This could mean he ultimately finds a role as a super-utility type like a Swiss Army knife. Speaking of which, anyone know where Grey is, I want to harvest his liver.” Okay, what now? This year, Biggio cut down on his Ks, and held his walks, hitting .306 in Triple-A, while adding in his usual mix of power and speed. I imagine he takes over for Sogard and hits leadoff. Sogard? So long! I added Biggio everywhere I could because I have a sickness for upside. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
“After Chris Davis raved about it, I had to check it out.” said James Paxton, as he sipped maple syrup. He continued, “It was my favorite show since the last time I saw Rush.” The Canadian then put on moose antlers, an orange vest and grabbed his shotgun. Before he exited the press conference, he smiled, adding, “Eh.” So, James Paxton busted that slumped like Chris Davis before him and like every team that faces the Sawx. Crazy when you have Mookie Betts hitting near-.200 and Benintendi out of the lineup, what a massive hole the Red Sox become, or a Mass-hole for short. Yesterday, James Paxton went 8 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 3.91, putting to doubt some concerns that he would be eaten alive by the New York lights. Paxton laughed, “It’s just like downtown Saskatchewan.” All the New Yorkers grinned, Paxton was already growing a tough, sarcastic sense of humor indicative of New York, when Paxton added, “Seriously, eh, there’s nothing finer than Regina.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yesterday, Gary Sanchez went 3-for-6, 6 RBIs with his 4th, 5th and 6th homer, hitting .258. “Thanks,” said Gary Sanchez’s owner from 2018, and I believe he was being sarcastic. You know how when you’re walking on the sidewalk and try to avoid stepping on the cracks because of the harm it will cause to your mother’s back? Then as you’re OCD-stepping around the cracks, you get off-step and start only stepping on cracks, and your mom texts you, “My back!” That’s what it must feel like for Sanchez’s 2018 owners. I know how you feel because that’s how it feels right now for me with Rougned Odor. I’m out in 2018 when Odor is decent, then in for this year’s abomination. When I’m supposed to avoid, I don’t and, when I’m supposed to be in on them, I’m not. FMFBBL! If you have Sanchez, well done, it looks like you’re back in for the good Gary. “Did someone say ‘back?'” Sorry, mom! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I believe Razzball is the friends and not the family, but I’ve been drafting with Scott Pianowski and Dalton Del Don so long they feel like family. Like my two cousins who call me when they’re in Los Angeles and say, “Hey, you wanna meet up for sushi? It’s your treat.” Then, when I go to meet up with them, they’re not there and 45 minutes after I show up at our meeting point, I get a text, “Sorry, have to cancel, so hung over.” It’s one word, father’s side of the family! Hungover is one word! As you might’ve noticed I didn’t say Brandy Ehrens was a part of the league, because he’s bailed on me/us/they; you choose the pronoun. I even hired a skywriter to put in the clouds above his house, “Kyle Schwarber wants you to draft him.” Guess someone else would have to draft some Cubs. (If you want to compete against me, Rudy and hundreds of others, join the Razzball Commenter League. More the merrier!) Anyway, here’s my Yahoo Friends & Family team, it’s a 15-team, mixed league:Please, blog, may I have some more?
It’s that time of the year to talk about everyone’s favorite topic, rebuilding! The Detroit Tigers are in full rebuild mode and likely will be for the next two to three seasons. The front office claims they want to compete in 2020 but progress is a slow process in Detroit. The most exciting thing to happen for Tigers fans last season was trying to decipher what happened during the fight between local broadcasters Mario Impemba and Rod Allen. Miguel Cabrera DH and friends lost 98 games last year and finished 3rd in a weak AL Central, which boasts a few other rebuilding teams with high expectations this year (looking at you Twins and White Sox.) I’m going to keep writing DH every time I type Miguel Cabrera until it becomes true. Thoughts become things. Did you know Justin Verlander, J.D. Martinez, and David Price were once on this team? Of course you did, but I have to mention it or someone in the comments will say “I can’t believe you didn’t mention they used to have JV, JD, and David?!”Please, blog, may I have some more?