“After Chris Davis raved about it, I had to check it out.” said James Paxton, as he sipped maple syrup. He continued, “It was my favorite show since the last time I saw Rush.” The Canadian then put on moose antlers, an orange vest and grabbed his shotgun. Before he exited the press conference, he smiled, adding, “Eh.” So, James Paxton busted that slumped like Chris Davis before him and like every team that faces the Sawx. Crazy when you have Mookie Betts hitting near-.200 and Benintendi out of the lineup, what a massive hole the Red Sox become, or a Mass-hole for short. Yesterday, James Paxton went 8 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 3.91, putting to doubt some concerns that he would be eaten alive by the New York lights. Paxton laughed, “It’s just like downtown Saskatchewan.” All the New Yorkers grinned, Paxton was already growing a tough, sarcastic sense of humor indicative of New York, when Paxton added, “Seriously, eh, there’s nothing finer than Regina.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Please see our player page for Shane Greene to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
Yesterday, Gary Sanchez went 3-for-6, 6 RBIs with his 4th, 5th and 6th homer, hitting .258. “Thanks,” said Gary Sanchez’s owner from 2018, and I believe he was being sarcastic. You know how when you’re walking on the sidewalk and try to avoid stepping on the cracks because of the harm it will cause to your mother’s back? Then as you’re OCD-stepping around the cracks, you get off-step and start only stepping on cracks, and your mom texts you, “My back!” That’s what it must feel like for Sanchez’s 2018 owners. I know how you feel because that’s how it feels right now for me with Rougned Odor. I’m out in 2018 when Odor is decent, then in for this year’s abomination. When I’m supposed to avoid, I don’t and, when I’m supposed to be in on them, I’m not. FMFBBL! If you have Sanchez, well done, it looks like you’re back in for the good Gary. “Did someone say ‘back?'” Sorry, mom! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I believe Razzball is the friends and not the family, but I’ve been drafting with Scott Pianowski and Dalton Del Don so long they feel like family. Like my two cousins who call me when they’re in Los Angeles and say, “Hey, you wanna meet up for sushi? It’s your treat.” Then, when I go to meet up with them, they’re not there and 45 minutes after I show up at our meeting point, I get a text, “Sorry, have to cancel, so hung over.” It’s one word, father’s side of the family! Hungover is one word! As you might’ve noticed I didn’t say Brandy Ehrens was a part of the league, because he’s bailed on me/us/they; you choose the pronoun. I even hired a skywriter to put in the clouds above his house, “Kyle Schwarber wants you to draft him.” Guess someone else would have to draft some Cubs. (If you want to compete against me, Rudy and hundreds of others, join the Razzball Commenter League. More the merrier!) Anyway, here’s my Yahoo Friends & Family team, it’s a 15-team, mixed league:Please, blog, may I have some more?
It’s that time of the year to talk about everyone’s favorite topic, rebuilding! The Detroit Tigers are in full rebuild mode and likely will be for the next two to three seasons. The front office claims they want to compete in 2020 but progress is a slow process in Detroit. The most exciting thing to happen for Tigers fans last season was trying to decipher what happened during the fight between local broadcasters Mario Impemba and Rod Allen. Miguel Cabrera DH and friends lost 98 games last year and finished 3rd in a weak AL Central, which boasts a few other rebuilding teams with high expectations this year (looking at you Twins and White Sox.) I’m going to keep writing DH every time I type Miguel Cabrera until it becomes true. Thoughts become things. Did you know Justin Verlander, J.D. Martinez, and David Price were once on this team? Of course you did, but I have to mention it or someone in the comments will say “I can’t believe you didn’t mention they used to have JV, JD, and David?!”Please, blog, may I have some more?
The September roster expansion this year was a bit of a dud. No Eloy Jimenez and no Vladimir Guerrero Jr. It’s too bad what’s best for baseball and these young players is not what is also best for their teams. Their rewards and our rewards are not aligned. It’s like going into the supermarket for pluots and they tell you, “It’s pluot season. Pluots are best this time of year. You want to eat dem pluots now so they slobber down your chin like you’re a human St. Bernard. So, we’re putting our pluots into liquid nitrogen to freeze them until mid-April of next year, and we will serve you pluots once their service time allows us to keep them an extra year.” However, the Nationals are working on a different schedule apparently because they are calling up Victor Robles, i.e., to the Victor goes the spoiled pluots. Where will Victor Robles play? Haven’t a clue, Colonel Mustard. Bryce Harper (1-for-2, 3 RBIs and his 31st homer yesterday) goes to right and Robles plays center while Adam’s Eaton the pine? Adam’s Eaton up time while Bryce goes to the bench because the Nationals know Harper is not in their future plans? Robles just plays periodically unless something goes completely sideways and the Nats will pass ‘o Robles. On Prospector Ralph’s top 500 fantasy baseball prospects, Robles is about as high a player can be who isn’t A) Not being called up this year. B) Not already called up. C) There’s no C. To give you an idea of Robles’ profile, think Starling Marte without knowing his upside. I will call you No Ceiling Marte. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Join the 2018-19 Razzball Fantasy Premier League for a chance at prizes! Don’t know about Fantasy Soccer? That’s okay, Smokey is here to walk with you throughout this journey of exploration and an absurd amount of accent marks on player names. So probably hide all your snacks. It’ll be a long journey…
Maybe they thought they were safe by bringing Kelvin Herrera as a Linus blanket until Doolittle returned. Maybe they were comfy with the veterans that they had lined up just in case. Well that “just in case” just happened. Herrera is now on the DL and Madson assumes the role of all roles. (Until Sean Doolittle comes back from a stressed out foot.) The Nats had such promise in preseason and even after the acquisition of Kelvin, to be a good bullpen. Former closers, like most men, are there to do their job and file their income tax returns on time like big boys. Well, they disappointed me and definitely the owners of Doolittle. Since July 3rd, or basically the last time Doolittle pitched, they have four saves. Four, fore, for! Only ahead of teams like the Padres, Blue Jays and Angels. By the way, if you are scoring at home the Angels haven’t had a save in 27 games. That is actually more mind-blowing than a team with decent starting pitching to only get four whole damn saves. Makes save-chasing on Madson or the like seem glum. So save your FAAB bucks for another day because Sean should be back within the fortnight, no idea if he mastered his emote dances yet though. Not that it really matters, but a save earned is a save kept. I know that works with pennies, wasn’t sure if that helped with counting stats at all. The season is coming down the stretch, do you have what it takes oh glutens of the SAGNOF? If you feel weary or just on cruise control because of Fantasy Football, than relax take a gander on some useful bullpen stuff, followed by the rankings…Please, blog, may I have some more?
The trading deadline is days away and the roles they are a changing. In comes one out goes the other. Closers losing value left and right while the waiver wire warriors of the world are circling like buzzards for the SAGNOF scrap heaps. The latest in the foray of closers to go is Joakim Soria, now a Brewer. The White Sox closer role is likely to go to Jace Fry or Juan Minaya. Not an awesome situation or a good predicament to be in, but a closer is a closer. The SAGNOF model should be: “Leave no good save behind”. Similarly, the Orioles traded Zach Britton to the Evil Empire, Brad Brach assumes the role there for the time being or until he gets traded for assets that the Orioles can ruin. The trade winds and finalized deals don’t help the set-up man either, as key components to the back-end game have been replaced by acquired talent. This is life for the ever building bullpen foundation of playoff contending teams. Build from the back, because the girth of talent that exists in the starters just isn’t there. So if you are currently zonked from losing a closer that no longer has a professional job of closing, it is time to speculate where speculating looks speculative. Look at guys on the secondary for teams that are rumored to be wheelin’ and dealin’. The Rangers, Nationals, Twins, Rays, Tigers, and to a lesser degree maybe the Cardinals… Be ahead of the curve instead of being caught looking at Uncle Charlie. Closer news is fluid this time of year, and by the time this gets posted there could be 2-3 more trades that make me look even dumber than I already do. More after the jump, with success stories and diminishing returns. Cheers!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Nick Williams was a popular preseason breakout target. Or tar-jay, if a soccer mom is reading. Targot, if you just returned from Target. Targo, if you’re eating escargot after going to Target. Tarshouldget, if Target doesn’t carry your size. Tarheel, if you stepped into tar then into Target. Tarnishes, obviously means your Target carries knishes, so you must be in Brooklyn, and it’s ironic. Tarte tatin, you’re wearing a hat made of slow roasted apples on your head in a Target. Whatever Target applies, wanna know why Williams was a popular preseason pick? C’mon, sit on my lap and I’ll tell ya. Metaphorically! Get off my lap, you weirdo! *sprays Lysol on legs* Really wish you didn’t touch my legs. So, Nick Williams had 15 HRs, 5 SBs and a .280 average in his last year of Triple-A, in only 78 games (!). He’s still only 24 years old. I know, he failed to live up to hype last year. OR DID HE?! Ooh, you heard of reversible umbrellas? That was a reversal question. Not similar at all. He only played in 83 games last year, a sloppy prorater would say he could’ve had 24 homers last year and hit .288. Maybe he doesn’t fully break out until next year (yes, he will be a sleeper), but he’s been hot in the last week, and on pace for another 24-homer season and has lowered his Ks. Plus, you don’t need to go to Target to buy him! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Was thinking about this the other day. Bear with me, it’s not fully formed (like the rest of this shizz). Is there a higher upside move than becoming a magician? David Blaine scored, Penn & Teller seemed to have done all right for themselves, Siegfried & Roy did fine until that white cat went ape…But how about all of the 18-year-old’s who are like, “Mom, Dad, I’m declining the full ride to Brown. I want to do this…” *pulls sheet off table to reveal their daughter sawed in half* “Oh, crap. Marci?” The world is littered with failed magicians! You want upside? There’s no greater upside call than deciding you want to be a magician for the rest of your life. The Indians team? They’re all freakin’ magicians! Hey, Jose Ramirez (2-for-4, 5 RBIs and his 26th and 27th homer), you’re David Blaine! Francisco Lindor (1-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 25th homer)? You’re David Blaine! Michael Brantley (2-for-4, 3 runs, 2 RBIs)? You’re David Blaine! You’re all David Blaine! We even have some David Blaine magic for Jason Kipnis (2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer, and 2nd homer in the last three games). If you went Francisco Lindor and Jose Ramirez with your 1st two picks, you’re also a magician, according to the Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. (The other way to look at this theory is only a handful of knuckleheads are actually stupid enough to want to be a magician, and the world is not littered with failed magicians and no one is turning down a free ride to an Ivy League school to become a magician, but we don’t talk about this part of the Upside Magician Theory.) Thank you, Jose Ramirez and Francisco Lindor and all the Indians, I believe your magic is real. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
In 1776 on July 1st, Ben Franklin grabbed Betsy Ross and four of her friends, and was like, “This will be better than Flag Day. We will call this Flagellation Day. Now twerk with a firework!” That lasted for three days until Ben yelled out an Astros’ hitter last name and called for a volunteer fire department to put out his redness. As the fire department extinguished his Reddick, Ben proclaimed July 4th to be a day of national celebration and the rest is history. It’s also when The Stros Spangled Banner was written. Any hoo! Josh Reddick (3-for-4, 2 RBIs) had a slam (8) and legs (4) yesterday, and it’s 2nd day in a row with a homer. He’s owned in only 30% of leagues and that is a crime to humanity, a first world one, at least. God Bless America and Ben Franklin’s Reddick! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?