Hishashi my dashi — slurp SLURP! Yesterday, Hisashi Iwakuma threw the AL’s first no-hitter since 2012, a span of three years (nice math skills, Grey stache!) This wasn’t an easy, rollover and let me scratch your belly, Padres club he was no-hitting either. This was no “Get out your Slinky and drop it from the top of the stairs and it’ll go all the way to the bottom,” this was more of a “Drop your Slinky and watch it get two stairs down, and then Chris Davis comes up and flattens one into the Pike’s Market concourse, and then one of the fish guys throws it back and then Machado comes up orders a Flat White with almond milk and he hits one over one of the 16,000 Starbucks* in the greater Seattle area.” Wow, I got totally lost in that analogy. Iwakuma’s ERAs are all over the place in his time in the states, but I’ll say this, everything else is nearly identical. His K/9 is always within point five, his xFIP is 3.29 now and it was 3.28 in his 2nd major league season, his fastball velocity was 88.9 last year; it’s 88.9 now, his walk rate is 1.5, it was 1.1 last year. This year, he’s given up more homers, that’s been the difference. You’d have to assume in Safeco homers would come down and Iwakuma would go back to being a mid to low-3 ERA pitcher. *I did the Segway Seattle tour during the All-Star break counting them. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Nelson Cruz – Out on Wednesday, dealing with neck spasms. Cruz said he wasn’t able to turn and look without moving his whole upper body. That never stopped Ken Patera!
Kevin Gausman – 7 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks. “Gausman, Taijuan, Matz, Rodon, Erasmo, Hutchison, etc.” “Alex, what are reasons why I may not draft a starter in the top 150 next year?” I love that Jeopardy started adding subjective questions.
Matt Wieters – His hamstring will be re-evaluated on Friday. He could be re-evaluated on Thursday, but he needs to stretch out the level of stress he puts his owners through.
Chris Heston – 6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners (4 BBs), 4 Ks, ERA at 3.38. I streamed him yesterday. You, “How did you know, Unkie Grey? Are you fantasy baseball’s Ms. Cleo?” No, or I never would’ve drafted Sandoval. I followed the Stream-o-Nator and Heston’s home track record.
Nori Aoki – Likely headed to the 7-day DL. How is it that everyone is now getting concussions? Fatty Arbuckle once gave Babe Ruth a concussion after hitting him on the head with a Coke bottle when he pulled it out of tight spot too fast, and Ruth never needed a concussion DL.
Carlos Gomez – Didn’t start yesterday due to a sore knee. Could have the two Cargos peed in the same fountain and accidentally switched bodies?
Colby Rasmus – 1-for-3 and his 15th homer, hitting .239. He’s going to get to .250 with 20 homers and look like he should be drafted next year, and you’re gonna draft him and want to drop him three days into the season. Every year with this guy.
Jed Lowrie – 1-for-4 and his 5th homer. If Lowrie hits another home run in the next few games, he will become the last player with middle eligibility to make it on my teams.
James Shields – 6 1/3 IP, 5 ER, 10 baserunners, 7 Ks in Petco, ERA at 3.89. He should be ashamed of himself. Harang had a 3.64 ERA in his year in San Diego. Effin’ monkey face!
Matt Kemp – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 12th homer. We should start an All-Star team of guys that were once amazing and got old at the age of 29, the Andruw Jones Also-Rans. You better believe Kemp is a starter.
Joey Votto – 3-for-4, 3 runs, 3 RBIs and a slam (20) and legs (7). Not only did I make Votto my preseason NL MVP pick, but I also placed a bet in Vegas on the Reds winning the World Series. Man, I wish I didn’t put my money where my mouth is.
Raisel Iglesias – 6 IP, 3 ER, 4 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 4.70. Fun fact! His name translates to “raise the roof in a church.”
Jacoby Ellsbury – Didn’t start yesterday for a mental day of rest. Coincidentally, his owners are going mental.
Danny Salazar – 7 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners (5 BBs), 8 Ks, ERA at 3.26. Who’s better, Carrasco or Salazar? On pure stuff, I’m gonna say Carrasco. On being a pitcher, which sounds like some nonsense you hear from John Kruk, I’m taking Salazar.
Jake Odorizzi – 6 IP, 6 ER vs. the Braves. I’ll send you five over-the-internet dollars if you can figure out who on the Braves knocked in four runs off of Odorizzi. If you said The Lithuanian Bathroom, you’re warm, he hit eighth and right in front of the culprit. Yes, Odorizzi was undone by the Braves nine hole hitter.
Asdrubal Cabrera – 2-for-4, 1 run, hitting over .500 in the last week. I know he’s not sexy, but he’s been schmotato’ing all around town for the better part of August.
Grady Sizemore – 3-for-5, 2 runs and his 6th homer. Now has four homers in his last nine games. No, I wouldn’t pick him up either.
Curt Casali – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 8th homer. You’re a son like Elroy, you wish you had a record deal, and Casali’s got Maas appeal. RIP Guru.
Edinson Volquez – 7 IP, 5 ER, 10 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.27 vs. Daniel Norris 6 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 2 Ks. This was a matchup of one guy you don’t want that you should and one guy you do want that you shouldn’t, but the one guy you should have you didn’t want yesterday. That sounds like the Rolling Stones’ You Can’t Always Get What You Want translated into Chinese and then translated back.
Jose Iglesias – 2-for-5, 1 run, hitting .305, and batting 2nd. Joe Church!
Bruce Rondon – 1 IP, 0 ER and his 2nd save, after Alex Wilson ruled himself fine to pitch. We are no monarchy, Alex, you will rule nothing.
Trayce Thompson – 2-for-3, 1 run and a homer on Tuesday. I hesitated mentioning him yesterday because he’s a platoon guy, facing lefties. That essentially kills all his value in mixed leagues, except for streaming. I’ve seem him compared to an old Razzball favorite, Jason Lane, but Richard Linklater never filmed Trayce. The comparison was meant prior to Lane becoming a herbathrowdite. Thompson might have some value streaming vs. lefties, but not much beyond that.
Drew Stubbs – Designated for assignment. Don’t worry, Rockie fans (do these exist?), Weiss kept Brandon Barnes.
Lucas Duda – Sat out again with a stiff back. On a related note, a frequent commenter, Nick the Dick, looks just like Duda. I know this because the other day he posted his family roast. It’s completely NSFW, but also awesome. If you want to see Nick, fast forward to the 28 minute mark, but his other family members are just as outrageous and well worth watching.
Yoenis Cespedes – 1-for-4 and his 1st home run as a Met (19th overall). Ugh, he was so hot prior to the trade to the Mets. Please, prove me wrong and do something in Metco.
Jacob deGrom – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA down to 2.03. Member how the Hosmer-hawk became a thing because Fox beat it down our throats during the playoffs? Could this postseason be the Autumn of the Mullet?
Juan Lagares – 1-for-4, 1 run as he’s hit leadoff for two straight days. I noticed he was batting leadoff on Tuesday, but I figured it was just a snafu by Terry Collins, but now we only need one more day for it to be a trend. I would wait until he’s hitting to add in shallower leagues, but if he’s leading off his value goes way up for deeper leagues.
Aaron Brooks – 1 2/3 IP, 8 ER. Dam, the Brooks, he’s gushing!
Danny Valencia – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 10th homer. This homer came against his former team. Okay, I cheated, every team is his former team. He does have three homers in the last six games and it hitting near-.375. Hot schmotato alert!
Chris Colabello – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 11th homer. Look at Cola showing pop! Pun points!
Justin Smoak – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 11th homer. So, he’s coming up a little short of the 40 homer prediction by JayWrong. Go to our fantasy football side of things, and make fun of him!
R.A. Dickey – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.96, but since June 1st his ERA has been 2.71. And I still wouldn’t pick him up. I just don’t trust knuckleballers. Or ballers. Or players. And I hate the game, too.
Marcus Stroman – Cleared to start rehab on August 21st. Okay, that’s it in the way of Stroman updates. He’ll return for a few games and be a streamer. In keepers, y’all need to stash him.
Starling Marte – Left yesterday’s game with hand discomfort, which sounds bad, but if we form a prayer parallelogram, hopefully he’s fine.
Gerrit Cole – 5 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA up to 2.48. It’s a miracle that he was able to keep the Cards to only this many runs with the defense behind him. Watching Pedro Alvarez bumble balls in Busch, I’m reminded of my 15-year-old self.
Gregory Polanco – 3-for-4, 1 run. Yes, you should own him. Yes, now.
Jung-ho Kang – 2-for-3, hitting near-.325 in the last week with a homer. There was Big Donkey, Mini Donkey, Mini Mini Donkey, El Burro and now…Donkey Kang!
Matt Garza – 7 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.82. You have bigger trouser oranges than me if you even consider owning Garza.
Ryan Braun – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 20th homer. Yeah, but what did Lind do?! Oh, nothing. Moving on!
Kris Bryant – 1-for-4 and his 16th homer, hitting .249. As I said when he first came up, he might be lucky to hit .240. In the last month, we’ve been seeing the effects of having a 30+% K-rate. I still like him with his speed and power, but he won’t hit for a high average.
Hector Rondon – 1 IP, 0 ER and the blown save as Braun scored on a wild pitch. You can’t fault Rondon for that, though Maddon might.
Jason Hammel – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.11. Hammel’s now failed to get out of the sixth inning in every game since July 3rd. I wonder if he’s hiding an injury. Or onomatopoeic, hmm. Or if I were Graham from MasterChef, I’d remove my glasses.
Aaron Hicks – 4-for-5, 4 runs, 2 RBIs and his 7th homer. On Friday, I made him my lede Buy. Today, I say uh-huh.
Miguel Sano – 3-for-3, 6 RBIs and his 6th and 7th homer, hitting .295. *you whimpering* What’s the matter? “I just finished reading The Sanotebook and I don’t get him in the end.”
Justin Turner – Likely to return on Thursday or Friday. Ah, yes, just what Mattingly needs, choices.
Clayton Kershaw – 8 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 2.39. It’s almost unfair. No, actually, it’s totally unfair.
Eduardo Rodriguez – 5 IP, 8 ER vs. the Marlins and gave up a leadoff homer to Dee Gordon. This was the moment that the Red Sox pitching staff threw the towel in right as Apollo Creed’s dead head hits it. The Red Sox pitching staff is so bad…How bad is it?! It’s so bad that, due to trips to the mound, the pitching coach’s FitBit turned from 999,999 back to zero.
David Ortiz – 3-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 24th and 25th homers. Even at a Latin 39, he makes it look so easy he could be hitting against Red Sox pitching.
Hanley Ramirez – Sat out again Wednesday even though he was supposed to return. This will push his re-injuring to Sunday.
J.T. Realmuto – 3-for-5, 3 runs, 6 RBIs and his 7th homer. On our Player Rater, Realmuto has been more valuable than Lucroy, Gomes, d’Arnaud, Wieters and Molina. How’d that ‘not punting catcher’ work out for you?
Cole Gillespie – 3-for-4, 3 runs and hitting near-.500 in the last week. I’d say hot schmotato, but I could also say Red Sox pitching.
Dee Gordon – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (2) and legs (35), hitting .330. I Googled “Dee Gordon homers” and Google asked, “Did you mean Dee Gordon military defeats?”
Giancarlo Stanton – Hasn’t yet been cleared to take batting practice. The doctors said, “Your hand looks like it’s healing–Who is that mustachioed man in the dumpster outside of the window?” And that was all I heard.
Maikel Franco – Sat out Wednesday and is sporting a splint. The good news is his splint has room for an 18-line poem by Prospect Mike.
Aaron Nola – 5 IP, 4 ER, 10 baserunners, 2 Ks, but scored the conshellation prize as his ERA sits at 4.25. I still like Nola a lot long term and in deep leagues, but in most shallower mixed leagues, you need to start looking elsewhere.
Cesar Hernandez – 2-for-5 as he continues to leadoff and hit. Speaking of hitting, did that Domonic Brown thing end already? What happened to that young brother? Asking for a friend, a friend who pierces his nipples and goes by the name of Tehol.
David Peralta – Out until Friday with a tight quad. You best hurry because beeyatches by Wally Pipping in the Diamondbacks lineup. I’m gonna guess I just caused a Googlewhack with beeyatches and Wally Pipping.
Ender Inciarte – 3-for-5, 2 runs. And now Peralta has been Pipp’d! Seriously, the Diamondbacks don’t hit many homers as a club, but everything else they do, they do turned to eleven.
Aaron Hill – 2-for-3, after a big game on Tuesday. Not sure if he’ll play every day, but if he does, he looks to be schmotato’ing.
Chase Anderson – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA up to 4.31. Chase just couldn’t do it in Chase Field. Similarly, FDR once threw out the first pitch and bounced it three times in the dirt in the Polio Grounds.
wow, just saw that hanram only has 9 doubles all year in Smokey’s post. As a first time Tulo owner, who drafted him right around where Hanram sometimes goes in drafts (and by player rater OPS he was preseason ranked just next to him), but having never owned Hanram at all, i need to stop whining about Tulo’s season. I was really pretty close to drafting either of them. Also, with as many offspring as baseball players seem to have, does anybody else wonder about whether huston street has kids with names like Wayco Street, Auston Street, Dallass Street, Peris Street, Big Toona Street and such?
@A Wesley Snipes Life: if he did i bet his parents would be proud that he carried on their tradition.
What a great time to own miller and holland.
Both seem off right now, which would you drop for Giles?
Rusty old Wade Davis.
@SteveNZ: old man back.
One last question, Corbin or Smyly ROS, I can only have one
Grey, what do you think of A. Wood ROS? I’ve got a couple offers for him but not too much (although someone offered Lackey)
Thanks bud
Yo Grey-lord! My trade deadline is in 2 hours. I just traded pujols and archer for Goldy and Lynn. How’d I do!?
Also do u like Freddie Freeman ROS over Betts, JD, Gomez, Marte???
H2H points league
@Nightmare: Nice trade!…Nope
@Nightmare: sounds good to me.
Injury bug central right now with Kendricks, Hanley and Stanton out. I will make the playoffs but getting a first round bye may be in question in our 12 team redraft league. I have strong pitching but now my outfield is Calhoun, Gardner, Peralta, K Davis, Paulsen. Herrera bouncing between OF and SS due to Hanley’s latest hangnail. howie Kendricks is on the wire. Do I grab him and suffer for a few weeks and drop Davis or Paulsen?
Or do I let him go to a competitor who has an open DL slot? Not good.
Sure, drop Paulsen for him
Is D Jennings interesting pickup @ all in a deep 16 man league? Need bags.
Yeah, I’d try him
Grey, Avasail or Parra?
Avisail
@Grey: thank u
No problem
Grey! My man! Who do you like rest of the year Lynn or syndergaard.
I have Thor and am a little worried of the 6 man rotation coming up. It’s h2h points leagues
Lynn, I’m worried too
Grey,
I’m in 2nd place and within striking distance of 1st in a non-keeper 6×6 ops, qs. Is it time to drop Carlos Gomez and ride schmotatoes the rest of the way or hang onto him and hope he picks it up?
Nope
Hello Grey. How’s it.
1) So….Wellington Castillo….career best hot streak or breakout?
I can’t see him doing that much better than Yan over the ROS, but I’m willing to listen.
2) Piscotty is starting to intrigue. Minors shows he has some pop that is due to come; and some speed, too. Think he takes off? Right now he’s doing great on avg. and runs, but….
Happy Friday eve.
-G
1) Hot streak 2) Yeah, I do
@Grey: WC has been on a holy terror since he got traded to AZ
Yeah, nice park and finally has playing time, he’s still only a 17-HR, .250 guy, which is decent, but he’s not this good
@Grey: wait, thats got to be top 5ish for a catcher without looking at numbers
Top 7, yeah
@Grey: Id take a late enough flyer on him next year.
Yeah, totally
Lester faces Detroit next week….get gose, rajai and all other sagnof in your lineups….
Totally
@Grey: saw something above about a q/a…did you see straight outta compton?
Tonight, and Cube will be at the Q&A
@Grey: skip tomorrows post and do a review instead??
Ha, nah, I’ll post my thoughts in tomorrow’s Buy
@Grey: Straight Outta Cron-ton???
Redraft h2h with OBP (no avg) and Ks (neg cat): Hicks or Pederson?
Hicks
Would you take Pineda over Gausman? When is Pineda going to return?
Yeah, when Pineda returns, maybe 14 days
@Dommattingly: i think best case was three more weeks.
Started Iwakuma on 3 teams. THREE!
Pity I also had Chase Anderson on two of ’em.
Best day since I streamed Philip Humber for his perfect game.
Humber, damn, that’s a blast from the past
@Grey: Indeed.
Probably need to drop either Avisail, Sano or Grichuk to get Solarte for his trip to Coors. Which one ya think?
Not sure how I’d fit any of those guys into my team, but that’s my problem, not yours. H2H, 14 teams, OBP and AVG etc and so on.
Avisail
Martin Perez vs Tampa
Or
Joe Kelly vs Seattle ?
6×6 roto
@Joeg414: i wouldn’t touch kelly, marty perez is at least somewhat improving since that 9 run or whatever it was inning.
Neither…Perez
Still planning for my H2H playoffs – 9/14 – 9/27. If I can trade my C. Davis for his Arenado in an OBP league where they have the following schedules, should I? Arenado is home for 10 out of 13 games BUT he’s only hit 3 HR’s since 7/1 and he’ll face the same 3 LAD pitchers twice (yikes if two are Kershaw and Greinke – which, by the way, if they go every 5th game, it would be!). Meanwhile, C. Davis 13 HR’s since 7/1!!
C. Davis – [email protected], [email protected], 4vTB, [email protected]
Arenado – [email protected], 3vSD, 4vPIT, 3vLAD
I’d want Arenado
Which side(h2h): agon/familia/adams or kendrys morales/chapman? Thanks
A-Gon
@Grey: i need power, should i get teixeira for picks instead? Thanks!
Sure, that works for me
Was offered Lynn, Hammel and Jose Ram for Tulo and Revere….should help with wins, keep 11 league though
Don’t love it
would you drop K Davis for Chavez, J Ross, or Gausman?
Gausman
guessing we don’t need to have the “bird” in hand as much as that saying goes since he’ll have few at bats, except for AL onlies where we have a weak roster spot?
Yeah, AL-Only and deep keepers/dynasty
How many starts will we see out of CMart ros? Thinking about trying to trade for value while I can. Thanks.
Maybe 4, hard for me to say cause the Cards said in June he’d be limited but haven’t said much since
Hi grey!
14 team keeper league. My lackey and Lindor forma his Dee Gordon. Whay do u think?
I have strasburg, kluber,greinke,samardzjia and smyly in pitcher role
Gordon side
Pineda going on rehab assignment – 45 pitches Sunday plus at least one more rehab start….
Rank ’em ROS redraft (QS league)
Pineda, Verlander, Bassitt, Chen, Erasmo, Gausman
Thanks in advance!
Pineda, Gausman
@Grey: Thanks! Would you drop Shoemaker or Latos for either? Both?
Yeah, both
@Grey: You are the best! Thanks again…
No problem
are those folks who wanted to drop AU RIZZ still alive if they actually did it? this could be like the where’s waldo books, but it would just end with some schlub drowned in a sewage ditch and his foot half chewed off by a dog or something more wild…. so less fun than where’s waldo. The more correct game could be Where’s Walden? in which we delve into the subterfuge emitted by STL cardinals with their injured players. Interviewees in this documentary movie/children’s challenge book/game would be at least (but not limited to) allen craig and his non-existent foot injury that did/didn’t turn a 3 str years of an OPS of over 800 to a guy probably in line right now at mcdonalds (for a job), shelby miller and his still never having gotten shut down for the playoffs two or so years ago according to the team, jon jay and his fake wrist injury (that actually healed BEFORE his 130ish at bats this year) simply to make sure grichuk/piscotty are given playing time over matheny’s wishes (this one i support fully), later episodes to include the drunk driving coverups of larussa/that dead RP guy etc.
Ha!
Grey, woud u start Samardzija vs Cubs?
Nope
It’s a little early.. but….. how would you rank these keepers. In parentheses, i’ll put the round to be kept in.
Harper (2nd round)
Rizzo (1)
Schwarber (late round)
Pederson (10th)
Frazier (4th)
Jose Fernandez (17th) — Obvious keeper
Syndergaard (late round)
Arrieta (5th)
Gray (4th)
I’m thinking Jose, Noah, Schwarber. But then again, I think too much.
@EA: And yes, I’ve got sexy options. I can keep 3 btw.
Harper, Frazier, Noah
Drop Nola for Peavy? Not much else available.
Sure
ok, so we probably don’t lose mcallister as good holds guy who counts as SP, but the same May we just got we are losing. dammit.
@goodfold2: great work on the accuracy and funnyitude of the edison/norris blurb.
Would you flip Sano for Cano? Sano could be kept for next year, but he may not even get 3rd base eligibility, and I’ve been trotting out Walker/Josh Harrison at 2nd.
Kang would replace my Sano at short.
@Joey: Also have an offer for Altuve. Options… options…
Nope
Kazaam for Kahnle. There goes my ratioes.
Yeah, that sucked balls
Streaming thoughts Grey? Trying to pick one…Quintana against the Cubs at home, Corbin at Atlanta, or Niese at Metco against the Pirates?
Niese
@Grey: Cool, thanks!
No problem
Great stuff as usual Grey,
10 team head to head redraft with a 12 game lead, thanks to you and my fellow razzballers!!
Who do I drop to activate Miggy? D. Peralta, Rusney, Melky or Jose Reyes? I have Kang at SS now and my OF is Adam Jones, Ellsbury and one of the 3 OF listed above.
I’m tempted to dump Reyes and ride Kang to the end. Also, would you drop any of those 3 OF for Hicks?
Thanks
Rusney
Melky for Hicks if you need an OF with speed
Erasmo was dropped. worth an add over anyone below?
Karns, Bassitt, Gausman, Joe Ross
Meh, they’re all streamers
Start Quintana (vs Arrieta) or McHugh (vs Verlander) the day after tomorrow?
Risky…Both in some leagues
Great write-up per usual. Ken Patera references are always a welcomed read. I already had an eye on Juan Lagares, but him hitting leadoff is going to be interesting. I think Lagares could be a breakout-type of player as soon as next year. Like 12-15HRs and 20SBs? Final question. Do you really hate “The Game”, or, do you hate the proverbial game?
P.S. “Torenado Alert”
@Peter Nincompoop: Lagares won’t sniff 15 HR’s. He’ll be lucky to hit 10.
@Cram It: For 2016? Sure, it depends on playing time, but I think he’s only going to improve. If he hit 10HRs and stole 2oSBs while hitting .280, he’d be a great 4th-to-5th outfielder.
@Peter Nincompoop: 10/20/.280 would be solid. And those are obtainable. I just don’t see the power/avg #’s. He needs to improve a lot as he’s clearly taken a step back from last year.
@Cram It: Could Lagares waft 12-15 HR’s in 2016?
@Peter Nincompoop: Highly unlikely. He just doesn’t have pop and he’s not that type of hitter.
Torenado! I think 10-12 HRs and 20 SBs are doable, but the Mets don’t seem like they want to play him every day
Cespedes for the rest of us. See, he’s catching the fever. Metsies!
@Cram It: yeah buddy
@Jef with 1 f: *high five*
Loving that!
@Grey: I’m gonna see if I can’t get that on a T-shirt before I go to the game on Tuesday.
That shirt should be given away at every game from now until the end of the playoffs… It can’t cost them more than Bonilla
@Grey: Ha. A rally T-Shirt? Cespedes has become one with the Rally Parakeet. Mets have all kinds of weird voodoo gaining traction.
@Cram It: I bought the same shirt you did last year. I wear it to all important events
As long as they all don’t grow beards, I’m cool with it
@Grey: Seriously, what team doesn’t do that now? Try something new, like shaving your eyebrows. That might actually throw your opponents off. I mean, imagine Fartolo staring you down with no eyebrows?! How could a hitter not lose it?
I love that! The playoffs and the Mets have waxed off all facial hair, eyebrows included
@Grey: And every hitter walks up to Buffalo Bills dance song “Goodbye Horses” from Silence of the Lambs.
How about a song from the Broadway musical Hair?
@Cram It: That is so weird Cram, I was just looking up the name of that song on the internet yesterday… Weird….
Hi Grey,
What do you think of Raisel Iglesias? Picked him up for a stream and cashed in! But should I hold onto him? Next two starts both at home against KC and D-backs.
12-team H2H with QS
Thanks!
He’s a streamer and not worth owning
Hi Grey, will you start Hendricks Vs CWS Samadzija tomorrow? (SON says $1.7) Thanks
Nope
Googlewhack confirmed! After I googled “Googlewhack,” of course.
HA!
It’s a phrase you don’t hear much of
Catcher Scab Itching! Wieters, Jaso, or D’Arnaud for AVG and counting stats (other than HR) ROS?
Thanks!
Ha, Travis
Dearest Maikel, thank you for the poem above. It is so appreciated during this tough time.
Here is the original transcript of the 18-line poem on your sling. ahem…
Maikel
My hell
Is seeing you in pain
That snake
Tried to clip your wing
But his efforts were in vain
Selfie?
Self – LESS
I know this to be true
You’ve carried
These fightin’ Phils
Since your MLB debut
Brother
Brotherly love
That’s what I feel inside
Your bat
Your swing
Instill a sense of pride
I love you Maikel!
Get well soon!
@Mike: *wipre tear* that was beautiful
I hope you wrote that wearing pants
Society’s “rules” have no place in my poetry. The most difficult part was writing it legibly on the sling while holding him down. He put up quite a fuss.
You need to roofie him first..Try using Hutchison on the road
@Mike: Ha!
Grey day, drop Beltre for Bruce Rondon? I have Machado, Sano, and Franco ahead of him (both for recent performance and keeper purposes)?
Meh
Have been offered Hosmer for E5. 8 team h2h redraft. Do you think Hosmer will be better ROS. Thanks!!
Hold
Who do you like more Sano or Kang?
Sano
@Grey:
Should I pull the trigger on Sano/Kang and Grandal for Schwarber?
All three rookies can be kept next year in the 15th round.
Nope
As in I want Sano
@Grey:
But Kang and Grandal for Schwarber is more to your liking?
And of course thanks! These fake baseballs are so difficult.
Schwarber side
Oh, no problem
Dear Prospect Mike,
The flowers you gave me
Are just about to die
When I think about
What could’ve been
It makes me want to cry
The sweet words you whispered
Didn’t mean a thing
I guess our song is over
As we begin to sing
Could’ve been so beautiful
Could’ve been so right
Could’ve been my lover
Every day of my life
Could’ve been so beautiful
Could’ve been so right
I’ll never hold what could’ve been
On a cold and lonely night
The mem’ries of our lovin’
Still linger in the air
Like the faded scent of your roses
They stay with me everywhere
Every time I get my hopes up
They always seem to fall
Still what could’ve been is better than
What could never be at all
(at all…)
How could I hold what could’ve been
On a cold and lonely night?
Love,
Tiffany…. er Maikel.
I think we’re alone now….
I look like Duda??!! I always get Ed Norton from American History X
Might be the lighting or the ball cap, but I saw Duda or Napoli, and Napoli didn’t have a blurb for me to mention it
@Grey: I thought the Yanks cap made me look like Giancarlo….or Nick Markakis if not in a fantasy world
Wow, the lighting must’ve been really bad!
@Grey: When the lighting is the deck light and a desk lamp, i’d say yeah, lighting wasn’t the strongest….thanks for the post though man, getting my views up!!
It deserved it, I kinda want to have that video playing in the background at my next party (or every party I ever attend)…
@Grey: Ha word. My mom just called me to tell me one of the gay guy couples who were there love it so much, and one is turning 40 in a few weeks and asked if we would come meet to learn more about the guy and roast him at his party. Getting gigs ya’ll!!
@nick the dick: you need representation
@J-FOH: And security is where you step in
I just want to be in Nick’s entourage
HA! You need to make a commercial and billboards… What’s the name of the company? Roasters?
@Grey: Shit, I don’t know, we weren’t a company til right now! When something clever hits you lemme know. I’ll be over here doing a Kickstarter thing to fund a nationwide commercial.
Ha! Don’t Be Chicken Roasters?
@nick the dick: Ha not bad! I think it helped when I had to explain to one of the gay guys what a feltcher is
@Grey: Our gay following is so strong
Especially after that asshole joke
@nick the dick: And the Ellen one
@nick the dick: Only had time to check out part of your dad’s bit (at least that’s my understanding of who’s who), and I was laughing my ass off. Thanks to your awesome family and Grey for sharing!
Nick’s family is the best!
@Hal Incandenza: Thanks! And that is just part 2 of the roast. Go back and watch when you have time, only gets better from there when me and my brothers go.
BTW, Nick, guess what I’m seeing tonight? Crazy motherfuc*er named Ice Cube, from a gang called…
@Grey: Not uh….him doing a show or you mean the movie??
Going to the movie…Cougs got us into an advanced screening
@Grey: Ah no way, you get to see all the good movies before us all! Awesome, I cant wait to see it
And Ice Cube’s doing a Q&A after
@nick the dick: Great video BTW!
Nick is the bomb dot gov
@Mrs.Featherbottom: Thanks Mrs. F!
Hey Grey.
Thanks for all of your help.
5×5, redraft, h2h, 12 teams, 20 player rosters (+ 1 DL space); currently in 1st place
C – Schwarber
1B – Encarnacion (Miggy is in my DL spot)
2B – Gordon
SS – Bogaerts (with Desmond as a bench bat; playing 1 or the other based on Hitter Tron)
3B – Frazier
OF – Harper
OF – A Jones
OF – Brantley
UTIL – Sano
Do I drop anyone for Hicks and/or Peralta?
Meh, you have no one to drop
@Grey:
thanks
@steven:
do I drop desmond or bogaerts once Miggy is healthy? Or Sano?
Desmond
No problem
Thinking of dropping both Cameron Maybin and Preston Tucker for Aaron Hicks and David Peralta. Thoughts?
Go for it
Grey, nice on Donkey Kang!
Can you rank these guys ROS:
Krush Davis
Avisail
Hicks
Vmart
@Nightpandas: add Revere as well
Thanks! Davis, Hicks, depends on needs with Revere
Is trading Bumgarner for Hamilton crazy if I need steals?
A bit crazy
@Grey: How much lower down the starting pitcher rankings is reasonable?
Maybe a Liriano-type
@Grey: Thanks so much for all of your time man
No problem
14 team H2H 6×6 (standard 5×5 with obp and holds) 3 player keeper league
Roster:
C. Castillo
1b. Pujols
2b. Odor
ss. Sano
Of. Trout, Harper, Cargo
Utl. Encarnacion, Pence
B. Santana, Franco
sp. Salazar, Tanaka, Carrasco, Walker, Ross, Corbin, 2 stream spots
rp. Krod, Tolleson, Vizcaino, Kahnle, Sanchez
Dl. Smyly, Hahn, Capps, Stroman
I’ve been offerd Miggy straight up for Sano. Sano can be kept next year in the 22nd round. I really don’t need Miggy but the Miggy owner is really interested in Sano for keeper purposes. I would have to trade for a ss or pickup Caeser Hernandez or Lindor off the wire. What should I do?
Hold
Sano or Franco ROS?
Thanks!
@Jeff: Sano is full on beast!
Sano
Stache Man Grey,
Where do you see Sano being ranked next year? Ahead of Longoria?
Thanks!
@Pundeck: Whoever has a strong finish at this point.
Longo has redeemed his entire fantasy season in years past by bashing a bunch of homers in the last month.
Maybe in the 7th round, depends on his final 6 weeks
Martin’s been slumping, could have hit a wall (ouch!). Should I trust Beef Wellington as his replacement ROS and pick up A Wilson for SAGNOF? Only a 10 teamer so I may even be able to get Martin back later on.
Ha! Yes, Welington and Wilson
Anyone running Bauer out today against the Yankees?
I wouldn’t
@Grey: Yeah, I’m thinking the Yankees have some pent up offense ready to explode today.
Go Blue Jays!
Do the Blue Jays need a ‘go?’ They are crazy stacked right now
@Grey: E5 needs to go get another cortisone shot.
I don’t know why these guys don’t get one every day, it’s the least they can do!
@Grey: It’s a magical cure all!
No joke, I went to my doctor because my elbow was messed up so he gave me the shot. My elbow felt great and my allergies went away for months!
You can hit homers now too?