Here we stand after one month of baseball. Ronald Acuña is finally up in the bigs! Still waiting on guys like Nick Senzel and Kyle Tucker to take their rightful places alongside them. As we head into May there continue to be players falling onto the DL and in the constant struggle to find replacements, here are my nominees for this week’s FAAB Five. All of these percentages can translate to any FAAB Budget, and my target league format is 12-15 Team (Mixed Leagues).Please, blog, may I have some more?
Please see our player page for Trayce Thompson to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
Didi, Didi, can’t you see, sometimes your home runs hypnotize me? Or how about, Gre-Gre-Gregorius? Gre-Gre-Gregorius… Gregorius sung by Duran Duran or Biggie work for me. Fun fact! Duran Duran is the past tense of Da Doo Run Run Da Doo Run Run. Bit a of a trivia whiz, though I did need to Google to see if it was spelled whiz or wiz. Did you know Truvia was discovered by someone sniffing artificial sweetener off a Trivial Pursuit card? Any hoo! Didi Gregorius went goofy time, there’s always money in the banana stand, crying at the end of The Last American Virgin but with tears of joy, with himself yesterday — 4-for-4, 3 runs, 8 RBIs and two homers (1, 2). His first homer went 346 feet, which is almost three and half Cespedes. I was way off Didi in the preseason, but that was almost (exactly) five games ago, let’s forget about that! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Spring Training is upon us! If I was a round pitcher filled with red liquid that could walk and talk, I’d scream, “Oh yeah!” Unfortunately, the only thing I am is round. Anyways, this time of year always reminds me of Jerry Seinfeld. We go to the doctor’s office and they tell us to wait. Then we get excited when they call our names so that we can go wait in the smaller waiting room. That’s where we are at in the baseball season. In the small waiting room. Close, yet so far. Over the next six weeks, I will be going through one division a week and will focus on the position battles for each team.
The 2018 Razzball Commenter Leagues are now open! Free to join with prizes! All the exclamation points!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yasmany Tomas, Odubel Herrera, Nomar Mazara. What do those players have in common? Guys that were in last year’s top 100 outfielders post that made it out like this is Orange is the New Black and those guys were Taystee. Only then Taystee got reincarcerated and brought with her that badass b*tch Vee, and Vee then started running shizz and that white ho, who the show was originally about that is annoying AF, started getting institutionalized with panty-selling and lez ho’ing and–Well, anyway, you get the point. There’s not a ton of sunshine in this top 100 outfielders, but occasionally you do get glimmers of hope. All the 2017 fantasy baseball rankings are under that link-ma-whosie. As always, my projections and tiers are included. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’m convinced Grey doesn’t sleep during the offseason as he compiles his rankings for the 2017 season. He’s about halfway there, which makes Bon Jovi proud, but halfway will eventually become full-way as more of his rankings are being churned out as we speak. Being the selfish writer that I am, more rankings means more of Grey’s thoughts to sift through, and more opportunity to unearth a valuable point of view that may be falling through the cracks.
For this first installment of ‘Under the Greydar’, a cloumn executed perfectly in the past by writers like Big Magoo, we turn to the law services of Joc & Cron, LLP for some advice on targets for the coming season. On top of charging me upwards of $500 per hour merely for conversation, they fittingly advised us to take a deeper look at Joc Pederson and C.J. Cron.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The day before our Independence Day, the Nationals exploded for six home runs, a fireworks display that would make the Grucci family jealous. The Grucci fireworks family has a fascinating history. Giuseppe Grucci in 1923 said to his momma, “I don’t want to be a two-bit gangster, cutting peoples’ fingers off for debt payment, I want to blow up thousands of fingers all across this great nation.” Then his mother smacked him and told him to finish his lasagna. Yesterday, Bryce Harper (2-for-4) hit his 17th homer, Wilson Ramos (3-for-4, 3 runs, 2 RBIs) hit his 13th, Anthony Rendon (2-for-3, 2 runs) hit his 8th, but at the heart of the fireworks celebration was Danny Espinosa (4-for-5, 6 RBIs) with his 17th and 18th home run, and his 4th and 5th homers in the last four games. For those of you who think he’s a weekend hot bat, he hit .309 with nine homers in June. He’s only 29 years old and he is a guy that has seasons of 20+ homers and 20 steals. So, yes, you should own him. Fun fact! Did you know what they call a fireworks display on July 3rd? A premature ejacu-elation. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The sixth inning of every home Clayton Kershaw start isn’t going to be the same. No longer will Angelenos be filing in as if it’s the first, suddenly realizing that Kershaw is pitching, but now they will be stuck talking about everything but baseball for the entirety of the game and not simply 95% of it. “Ma, can I keep score on the back of my headshot?” “We’re not here to see the game, Timmy, we’re here to run into commercial directors. This is where Stew’s mom got him that Tropicana commercial. You want to pay my bills, don’t you?” “Sorry, ma.” Like the oral sex scene in The World According to Garp, it’s a devastating blow losing Kershaw for any amount of time. He was diagnosed with a herniated disc, but won’t require surgery. The Dodgers are hoping he’s back (poor choice of words) from the DL right after the All-Star Game. I’d pray with you, but I’m using my hands to clap for not drafting a pitcher in the 1st round. The Dodgers did pick up Bud Norris in a trade to fill in. Won’t see any fall off there! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
You have Eugenio Suarez as your middle infielder and are growing bored, so you check out The Replacements, and there’s so many possibilities. Anything you want, dear, is fine, fine, fine, fine, fine. Everything you say, dear, I’ll buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, goodbye Eugenio. He was merely a steward to better things. Sorry, too formal, he was a waiter in the sky. He played/was fair, don’t wanna complain. Don’t want to treat him like a bum, don’t wanna ask Cougs and Ted who I should pick up in case of a tie. Now, I like what I hear about Tim Anderson. If bein’ wrong’s a crime, I’m waiver wiring forever. If bein’ strong’s your kind of pick up, then I need help here this Tim’s got power like a feather. If bein’ afraid is a crime, put the two players side by side. Cause Tim’s at the SAGNOF party down the line. So, Tim Anderson is just steals? Well, not entirely, but that’s what he mostly is. He can also hit for a solid average. In the minors the last three years, he hit .364, .312 and .304. The Honkey Sox seem happy to try him at leadoff, and, with his batting average skills, he should stick there. The speed is real — stealing 49 bases last year in the minors. I’d absolutely take a flyer on him for speed alone. South Park isn’t the only place that has a Tim A. with wheels. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Just Damn. Just Doh. Just Don’t-tell-me-he’s-out-for-the-year. Just Depression. Just Difficulty-feeling-happiness. Just Dis-stress-is-stressing-me-out. Just D-negative-words-in-the-thesaurus. Just Dissolvent. Just Did-you-say-dissolvent? Just Don’t-stop-hugging-me-with-your-eyes-Ted-I-can’t-be-alone-right-now. A fractured elbow for J.D. Martinez. It happened when he ran into a wall. Apparently, the wall doesn’t own him. I hate you, wall! “If he dies, he dies.” Oh my God, the wall is imitating Ivan Drago! I knew it! The wall is a Russian super-villain. Martinez will head for a CT scan. I don’t know how long he’ll be out with a fractured elbow, but it sounds like it will be a while. Let’s join in the shape of a parallelogram and pray. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Wikipedia says groupthink is, “A psychological phenomenon that occurs within a group of people in which the desire for harmony or conformity in the group results in an irrational or dysfunctional decision-making outcome. Group members try to minimize conflict and reach a consensus decision without critical evaluation of alternative viewpoints by actively suppressing dissenting viewpoints, and by isolating themselves from outside influences. Now spend forty minutes randomly popping around the internet until you somehow end up on an exercise video of Morgan Fairchild.” I’m sure someone has already done this, but you know how there’s Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon? Why isn’t there an internet six degrees to tepid porn? No matter where you are, you are six clicks from tepid porn. Any hoo! I was thinking about groupthink because of the comments on this site, but it’s more like groupspeak. Just listen to what the groupspeak say. Sometimes you get comments that can be helpful, even if they’re not intentionally trying to be helpful. If you see ten to twenty random comments asking about Danny Duffy, a pattern emerges. A beautiful snowflake pattern because every comment is different unless it’s a catcher question. With that many people asking about Duffy, there might be something there. So, I looked at his stats, and, J. Lo and behold, his peripherals are gorge. In 43 IP, he has a 10.3 K/9, 1.5 BB/9 and a 3.52 xFIP. He’s there with a 95.7 MPH fastball and a change that is buckling hitters. These are not waiver wire pitcher peripherals. These are ace pitcher numbers. I’d go pick him up right now…Which should only take you three clicks, so you have three more clicks to find Morgan Fairchild doing crunches. Enjoy (or be careful)! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?