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Grey

Author: Grey

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Grey

Giants Sauce Things Up By Turning To Matos

June 14, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 277 Comments

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Mitch Haniger fractured his forearm on a pitch, which was his most solid hit this year. Giants’ beat reporters are saying Luis Matos is being called up. Luis Matos being called up is fun. I like fun. Transitive! I like Luis Matos. He had hit six homers in the last six MiLB games. Total damage in the minors: 9/15, and he was hitting .396 in Triple-A. Can I get a giddy up, pardner? Itch said two days ago he was on his Prospect Stash List. Itch said previously, after Matos was coming off a disappointing previous year, “The premium bat speed remains. He just needs to develop better plate discipline. He has the hands to make contact with most pitches, so he swings at most pitches. That has to change. Development is not linear. He’s got time, and I might do time if I find where Grey lives.” Okay, honestly, I’m scared. So, I grabbed Matos in my shallowest leagues. He’s got power and speed, and he’s crazy hot. Let’s see how far it takes him. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Royals Finally Let Blanco Sit On Dairon Throne

June 13, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 266 Comments

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Royals called up insanely fast speedster,  Dairon Blanco (1-for-4). He’s so fast he just ran in your room, mussed your hair and ran back out without you even seeing him. His name translates to “Strike while the iron is white hot.” Roughly. I’m not a linguist. Dairon has 47 steals in 49 games in Triple-A, which is absolutely hilarious. Oh, and he’s 30 years old. Okay, so the Royals have one of those teleporters like in The Fly, and Rajai Davis was in it when a cheetah entered. They got zapped together and out walked Dairon. Idea Alert! Every MLB team should be required to have an 80-steal burner. Like they all have LOOGYs, they should all have Billy Hamilton clones. This isn’t an idea, this is a must-have. If your fantasy team’s steals are anemic, Dairon is your answer. Otherwise, I’d prolly wait to see the next guy to come out of the cheetah teleporter. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Gunnar’s Finally Hitting The Target

June 12, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 428 Comments

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14.4% walk rate. That stands out as the difference between young players, who have promise, and what Gunnar Henderson (3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer) has done. Thinking back to when Keston Hiura appeared to be a top prospect. He flamed out with a walk rate half of Gunnar’s. Gunnar Henderson just went through conceivably the most difficult stretch of his young career, and did it with a 14.4% walk rate. That’s remarkable. Most vets can’t do that. It’s common sense: A player struggles and starts swinging at everything and spirals out of control until they’re asking, “Is the whole team going to Golden Corral tonight?” as they stand in line for minor league meal vouchers. Yesterday, Gunnar hit the longest home run in Camden Yards history; it reached the street, then rolled to Hamsterdam. Since June, he’s hit .458 with four homers. He has a higher OPS than Kyle Tucker, Schwarber, Jul-Rod and Machado, to name a few. In the last month, he’s hitting near-.300 with a .265 ISO. To me, the most impressive number is still 14.4%. Gunnar sounds like a viking backwards and forwards, and you Cnut ask for more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Pick Up A Pratto Ticket At the Buydega

June 9, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell, Featured | 347 Comments

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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH)

I can search the site for old comments. It’s my superpower. Well, that and being able to tell if a sushi restaurant is good just from their spicy tuna roll. Okay, I also have the superpower: Being able to add three syllables to any Spanish name. Fine! I can also avoid any fight with my wife by saying, “You’re right.” That’s perhaps my strongest superpower. But, back to searching old comments, I will save people the embarrassment but here’s one from the end of last April:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Gray Throws 50 Shades Of Nasty At The Cardinals

June 8, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 371 Comments

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On the left side of the screen, my face comes out and says, “Jon.” My face comes out on the right side of the face and says, “Gray.” Welcome back to another edition of Grey on Gray. How is Jon Gray this good? We go to my first thought, “The Rangers are cheating.” No? Okay, maybe not, but their offense is fierce and their pitching is about as good as the Rays. Wait a minute…Rays…Grays…My God! They’re both cheating! No? Okay, perhaps not, but Jon Gray (9 IP, 1 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 12 Ks, ERA at 2.32) looks gorgeous, and there’s no shame in us kinda sharing a name. Welcome aboard the Gray Train! Next stop googling old pictures of Erin Gray on Buck Rogers! Short story on Jon Gray: He could be this good; he’s not quite this good; he could get lucky all year; there’s scenarios in play; semi-colons are fun. A 2.32 ERA is a tough order to maintain. Regression could happen. Coolwhip just gave you a full Jon Gray fantasy that is comprehensive to his changes. It’s all down to a very nasty slider and his sweeper (which is a horizontal slider), or just his slider, depending on where you’re looking. It’s been pitch black–damn, I shouldn’t have used a thesaurus for that. It’s lights out. A combo of a change working, slider killing them, a fastball inducing weak fly balls and cheating has made Jon Gray go from okay to may-as-well-be-on-the-Rays.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Brighter Days In Cincy Thanks To Elly D Light

June 7, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 385 Comments

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Reds’ manager, David Bell, who is commonly known as Dumb Bell, not because he’s the dumbest motherf*cker to ever manage a baseball team — Phil Nevin is dumber than him — he’s known as Dumb Bell, because he’s the 2nd dumbest MLB manager. (It’s a 29-way tie for 2nd.) Imagine having five top 100 prospects, all under the age of 27, and thinking, “How do I get Kevin Newman into the lineup?” This perplexed Dumb Bell for countless hours. He took a trek to visit a Buddha statue in downtown Cincy (it’s outside Buddha’s Mongolian BBQ) to ask the Buddha what he thought he should do, and the Buddha said, “Look deep within for the knowledge you possess,” so Dumb Bell dropped his pants, bent over backwards in front of a mirror and tried to find that knowledge deep within himself. Sadly, the only knowledge he now possesses is he needs to wipe better. So, Dumb’s got a new piece to play with as Elly De La Cruz was called up. Just gave you an Elly De la Cruz fantasy. Yes, he’s a pickup in every league. Oh, and “yes” reminds me of something: Where the Helly is CES? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Trea And Phillie Pitching Has Me Pinky Circling My Aaron Nolas

June 6, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 448 Comments

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Ah…you smell that? That’s the inevitable runs that Aaron Nola (7 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 3 walks, ERA at 4.30. ) gives up every game, but as unearned. Smells so nice. Can we bottle that? Wait, I have something else for you to smell. No, not that! Don’t pull Eduardo Rodriguez’s finger! I’m talking about this…*takes a long, deep inhale* “Did you put rose petals on top of doggie doo?” Ah, yes! Trea Turner‘s game yesterday (4-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBIs) on top of his season-long “Everyone, check your sneakers because someone dragged in an odor, and it wasn’t Rougned.” With that odor lingering, it’s a bad time to shut the Buy Low Window, too. June’s Kyle Schwarber’s month, but Treat Urner is the type to go from zero to 100 in the matter of one game. As we saw in the WBC, he can hit 12 homers in two weeks, and get his average up fifty points in the snap of a middle and thumb. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Here’s DeLuken At You Kids

June 5, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 432 Comments

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Yesterday, the Dodgers called up Jonny DeLuca. He’s been tearing up Triple-A, which is pretty impressive for a studio enforcer who’s having an affair with Lana Turner. Jonny DeLuca’s got all the photogs on call, and, yeah, see, he’s got pics of your favorite movie stars in ways you don’t wanna see them, see. He’s also got solid power and speed, and had a 15% strikeout rate in Triple-A, so the contact is there too. Think he might be more of an NL-Only or deeper mixed league guy for now, but worth monocling. Unless you wanna see your dame splashed all over Look! magazine. Also, the Cards are calling up Luken Baker, but, if you’ve seen him, he looks exactly like Adam Dunn. In the minors, he even wore his number.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

When It Comes To Elly De La, It’s Just Cruz, Myself and Buy

June 2, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell, Featured | 393 Comments

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(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH)

“Please welcome to the stage, De La Cruz, the Spanish-language De La Soul cover band, and their smash hit, “Sábados.” De La Cruz sings, “Sábados es a Sábados, Sábados es a Sábados, Sábados es a Sábados, Sábados es a Sábados…” A kid squints, unsure if he’s in the right place. He asks the kid next to him in Spanglish, “Hola, amigo, I thought es concerto was about Elly De La Cruz?” The kids says back, “Sorry, I only English and Spanish, separately.” So, Elly De La Cruz and Oneil Cruz don’t just share a last name. They look like the zygote split at exactly six foot, five inches. They are the Big John Studd and Hulk Hogan locked-up, forehead-to-forehead, throwing 107 MPH bullets to first and hitting 120 MPH lasers into the bleachers. Elly De La Cruz and Oneil Cruz are both 40/40 threats with contact issues. If Elly De La Cruz is called-up within a few weeks, they’ll likely both be drafted within a round of each other next year. They are the Wonder Twin Powers. Regarding Elly De La Cruz and when he’ll be called up, I figured later this year, but I could be wrong (would be the first time), and I don’t want all of you to miss out. My figuring had a lot to do with Christian Encarnacion-Strand is much older and should be promoted first, then De La Cruz would be called up, but it doesn’t need happen to like that. They’re both ready, and De La Cruz might be younger, but is actually better. De La Cruz could be a top 50 overall player the rest of the way, and absolutely should be stashed. He’s definitely ready for his walkup music: Meany, meany, meany, meany (Decir que?), Meany, meany, meany, meany (Decir que?) Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

J Walker Crosses The Road Again To Busch Stadium

June 2, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 222 Comments

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I was lost, out of sorts. I began standing at urinals with my pants at my ankles like I was a five-year-old. I’d say to Cougs, “I did a poopie.” Soiled. Ugly. Couldn’t go on. Jordan Walker was sent down. The power of his presence gone. From my life. Pain. I felt. Today, WE’RE BACK BABY! I’m pulling up my shorts and no longer asking my wife to wipe me! I’m an adult again! My oxygen mask can be removed! I can breathe again without your assistance! The roses are redder than they’ve ever been. Tear up my Last Will and Testament; I’m gonna live forever like Irene Cara! I can feel it! So, I still don’t understand Walker’s playing time shituation but I doubt he’s being called up to sit on the bench. Grab him everywhere. Unless you don’t love love. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Josh Naylor(ioles) To The Wall

June 1, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 318 Comments

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I was feeling reflective yesterday, so I turned to the mirror and sang to myself, I bought a toothbrush, some toothpaste–Mirror, “Please don’t sing that song.”–A flannel for my face…Pajamas, a hairbrush–“Please stop, please.”–New shoes, and a case! I said to my reflection–Stop Squeeze’ng me! Yesterday, Josh Naylor H.A.M. got on a roll (4-for-5, 3 runs, 6 RBIs) with a slam (8) and legs (4). Naylor? Can’t we talk first? Get to know each other? I’m tempted but the truth is discovered…Can Josh Naylor become a thing? Sure. I fumble for the clock…alarmed by the seduction…Time to get serious, what kind of thing did you have in mind with Naylor? There is a large contingent of 1st basemen like Josh Naylor who will give 20-24 homers, no speed and a .270 average. In Squeeze terms, that’s a novel, some perfume, a fortune all for you. It’s basically a top 15 1st baseman, and right now he’s around the 25th best 1st baseman (or was prior to yesterday, at least), so he’s got some ground to gain. Will you become bored of Naylor if you roster him? I see what you’re saying…Tempted by the fruit of another… Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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