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Huh, weird. 4,030,000 results but Google knows which one to feature. And some of y’all say AI is bad. AI, tell me why people are against AI. “They’re not, Grey. Everyone loves AI.” Oh, okay, cool! Joe Ryan (9 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 2.98) wasn’t necessarily an unpopular call by me. He still had an ADP of 144 at the time I published my post, and drafted as late as 216th overall. Did I move the market on him? I like to think so, but even if he moved up to 80 overall, Sandy Alcantara was going at 25th overall, so was there value still to be had on Joe Ryan? Yeah, I like to think there was. Is this entire lede just me patting myself on the back? You’ll get over your scoffing and allow me one occasionally! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If David Hamilton could swim like he could run, he would’ve been sent down to the Titanic wreck to save those in the submarine. Talk about the worst Gilligan’s Island spinoff ever. Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip that started from roughly 60 depths under the sea… “Skipper, we have two hours left of oxygen.” Skipper smacks Gilligan with his hat, waving away oxygen. Gilligan gulps, “Make that one hour and thirty minutes.” The story on the submarine billionaire is like a reverse Icarus, and I want to read everything about it. Any hoo! David Hamilton isn’t a swimmer (maybe he is, I have no idea), but he is a runner. Boy, is that guy fast. He’s so fast rather than calling Spectrum’s customer service, he ran to a call center in Hyderbad to ask his question in-person. Wow, that’s fast! Don’t know Hamilton’s playing time sitch; he might not be called up for long, but he’s incredibly interesting because he was a 23/97 guy combined over the last 171 minor league games. Yeah, pretty good! I grabbed him in my most shallow leagues just in case he sticks, though he might not stand in one place long enough to stick. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

[brid autoplay=”true” video=”1326698″ player=”13959″ title=”2023 Razzball BUY, SELL, HOLD For Fantasy Baseball Week 12″ duration=”200″ description=”undefined” uploaddate=”2023-06-14″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1326698_th_648a13529225b_1686770514.jpg” image=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1326698_sd_648a13529225b_1686770514.jpg” contenturl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/1326698.mp4″ width=”480″ height=”270″] The Guards are calling up Gavin Williams. *insert Michael and the rest of The Office excited* We love ourselves some big-time pitching prospects, don’t we? *thinking about Gavin Stone and Grayson Rodriguez and […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

[brid autoplay=”true” video=”1326698″ player=”13959″ title=”2023 Razzball BUY, SELL, HOLD For Fantasy Baseball Week 12″ duration=”200″ description=”undefined” uploaddate=”2023-06-14″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1326698_th_648a13529225b_1686770514.jpg” image=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1326698_sd_648a13529225b_1686770514.jpg” contenturl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/1326698.mp4″ width=”480″ height=”270″] Luis Arraez has three 5-hit nights this month, including last night. He’s batting .400 on the dot. Speaking of dots, there’s a laser dot on Ted Williams’s forehead, slowly heating him up so […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Happy Father’s Day to all of you who celebrated yesterday by saying, “Did you hear that? The dog just farted,” when you farted. We see you, we love you, we smell you. Change your shorts. You sharted. One guy who will not shart nor blame the Labrador is Henry Davis, who was called up. Just yesterday, Itch told you to stash Henry Davis, saying, “Davis is slashing .321/.472/.571 in eight games at Triple-A. Like the Reds are doing with C.E-S, the Pirates have been playing Davis in the outfield, where his athleticism fits well. I don’t understand why he couldn’t play outfield a couple days a week, DH a couple and catch a couple, even if he’s got some things to learn behind the plate. Reminds me I’d like to throw a plate at Grey’s head.” What on earth? To give you an idea of my excitement, I had Jordan Hicks, due to saves, at the front of my FAAB queue, then had Emmet Sheehan, due to his *makes drool facing*, then I heard Henry Davis was being called up, and moved him into the 1st slot for NL-Only. Bo Naylor being called up is interesting too in mixed leagues, will cover him in the post. Check out this new dance I’m doing, it’s called The Alejan-Drop, I make a face like I just smelled the dog’s fart, but really was looking at Alejandro Kirk’s stats, then move my hand around like I’m dropping Kirk to waivers. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Okay, I’m going to fall slowly back now, are you ready to catch me?”
“Go for it…”
“Okay, are you sure you’re ready? You sound like you’re 40 to 50 feet behind me and not right under me.”
“I’m…right…behind…you.”
“Okay, you sound like you’ve moved even further away. I know part of the exercise is just fall backwards and you’re going to catch me, but I can barely hear you.”
“Sorry, what did you say?”
“Damn it, I can hear you moving further away from me! This trust fall is not going to work, is it?” I turn around to find Bud Black is a football field away from me. “You weren’t going to catch me!”
Bud Black screams, “I had you!”

That’s Bud Black and every fantasy baseballer (<–my mom’s term!). You cannot trust Bud Black. He’s untrustworthy! I wouldn’t trust him to suddenly play Nolan Jones forever. I’m going one game at a time here with Jones. At some point, Curtis Jackson Cron will return and it’ll be two tears in a bucket and Jones will be told to eff off. For now, Jones is a guy who has nearly 20/10/.330 between Triple-A and the majors in less than 60 games. Will it continue? Well, the power is real, the steals are real, but he is likely closer to a .260 hitter. Still very valuable. Just don’t get on a chair and fall backwards into his expected production. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Shohei Ohtani (1-for-2, 2 RBIs, hitting .301) hit his 22nd homer to tie for the MLB lead, and he tossed 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.29, vs. the Rangers in Texas, one MLB’s best teams, and the Win. Are there enough superlatives for Ohtani? Let’s try, he’s the best baseball player ever. Good place to start. It’s unfair to compare different eras, because things were different 100 years ago when Babe played. Things were different 20 years ago when Bonds was in his heyday. Speaking of which, besides those two, there was Say Hey, there was Hammerin’, there was–Rickey knows you’re not forgetting Rickey–There was Rickey! None needed their full name mentioned. You knew who I meant. None pitched as well as Ohtani is pitching. Babe’s the only one to even give that a go, and we know when he was an elite hitter, he wasn’t also a pitcher. Ohtani sent a ball 443 feet the opposite way last night with ease, has hit six homers in seven games, and has 105 Ks in 82 IP, which is third in strikeouts. Absurd. There are no superlatives. He is the superlative. Superlative Ohtani. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

In the biz, we call this an “In Appreciation Of” post. This is in appreciation of Tildaddy. The one and only: Ronald Acuña Jr. (4-for-8, 3 runs, 4 RBIs and a double slam (14, 15) and legs (29), hitting .333). Tildaddy says you are done with your chores! Scientists should get together Ronald Acuña Sr., Fernando Tatis Sr., Bobby Witt Sr., Michael Harris I and other former players, who have elite MLB sons, and let them study them. Like the movie, Concussion, but call it Cushion Pushin’. Tildaddy is running away with the top spot on the Player Rater, and–Well, one of his home runs yesterday went 461 feet and it looked like he was barely swinging. Put that together with a guy who might have 45 steals by the All-Star Break, and we’re looking at a possible 40/70 season. I just nearly fainted. I need to sit down. Sits in a hole labeled “People who faded Acuña in the preseason.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Mitch Haniger fractured his forearm on a pitch, which was his most solid hit this year. Giants’ beat reporters are saying Luis Matos is being called up. Luis Matos being called up is fun. I like fun. Transitive! I like Luis Matos. He had hit six homers in the last six MiLB games. Total damage in the minors: 9/15, and he was hitting .396 in Triple-A. Can I get a giddy up, pardner? Itch said two days ago he was on his Prospect Stash List. Itch said previously, after Matos was coming off a disappointing previous year, “The premium bat speed remains. He just needs to develop better plate discipline. He has the hands to make contact with most pitches, so he swings at most pitches. That has to change. Development is not linear. He’s got time, and I might do time if I find where Grey lives.” Okay, honestly, I’m scared. So, I grabbed Matos in my shallowest leagues. He’s got power and speed, and he’s crazy hot. Let’s see how far it takes him. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Royals called up insanely fast speedster,  Dairon Blanco (1-for-4). He’s so fast he just ran in your room, mussed your hair and ran back out without you even seeing him. His name translates to “Strike while the iron is white hot.” Roughly. I’m not a linguist. Dairon has 47 steals in 49 games in Triple-A, which is absolutely hilarious. Oh, and he’s 30 years old. Okay, so the Royals have one of those teleporters like in The Fly, and Rajai Davis was in it when a cheetah entered. They got zapped together and out walked Dairon. Idea Alert! Every MLB team should be required to have an 80-steal burner. Like they all have LOOGYs, they should all have Billy Hamilton clones. This isn’t an idea, this is a must-have. If your fantasy team’s steals are anemic, Dairon is your answer. Otherwise, I’d prolly wait to see the next guy to come out of the cheetah teleporter. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

14.4% walk rate. That stands out as the difference between young players, who have promise, and what Gunnar Henderson (3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer) has done. Thinking back to when Keston Hiura appeared to be a top prospect. He flamed out with a walk rate half of Gunnar’s. Gunnar Henderson just went through conceivably the most difficult stretch of his young career, and did it with a 14.4% walk rate. That’s remarkable. Most vets can’t do that. It’s common sense: A player struggles and starts swinging at everything and spirals out of control until they’re asking, “Is the whole team going to Golden Corral tonight?” as they stand in line for minor league meal vouchers. Yesterday, Gunnar hit the longest home run in Camden Yards history; it reached the street, then rolled to Hamsterdam. Since June, he’s hit .458 with four homers. He has a higher OPS than Kyle Tucker, Schwarber, Jul-Rod and Machado, to name a few. In the last month, he’s hitting near-.300 with a .265 ISO. To me, the most impressive number is still 14.4%. Gunnar sounds like a viking backwards and forwards, and you Cnut ask for more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH)

I can search the site for old comments. It’s my superpower. Well, that and being able to tell if a sushi restaurant is good just from their spicy tuna roll. Okay, I also have the superpower: Being able to add three syllables to any Spanish name. Fine! I can also avoid any fight with my wife by saying, “You’re right.” That’s perhaps my strongest superpower. But, back to searching old comments, I will save people the embarrassment but here’s one from the end of last April:

Please, blog, may I have some more?