Holding hands together with a Juan Soto plushie, tiptoeing around my office in a tutu. I LOVE JUAN SOTO SO MUCH! There, I said it.

I cannot stop my pure heart from being driven in by Juan Soto when I’m waiting on base aka sitting on the toilet. It’s love! Damn you all for not understanding! So, Juan Soto is having a 2nd half that is insane, did you know this? I did. Hence, telling you. He’s now leading the major leagues in batting average, and OBP. For someone to swoop in and find my heart while not hitting a ton of homers? Well, Sexy Dr. Pepper’s doing it, but I wouldn’t advise anyone to try it. It’s not easy! Yesterday, Soto went 3-for-3, with his 28th and 29th homer, while hitting .325. Oh, bee tee dubs, .325 this year is like hitting .415. Sorry, Ted Williams, he’s passed you. ACKCHUALLY, he has 50 games where he’s reached base 4+ times before turning 23, and only one in history with more is Ted Williams at 54. He’s also got the most career games with 2+ HRs and a walk before turning 23. He’s 22 years old! And he has the 2nd most multiple homer games before turning 22, behind only Eddie Matthews. 2022 give me Juan Soto in the top five again, right? Yes, I love him! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Patrick Corbin – 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 5.92. Thinking about the madness that might’ve drove someone to start Corbin in Cincy and shuddering at the thought. If only mommy hugged you!

Chris Bassitt – 3 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 3.16, as he was activated from the IL. The alphabet is now U, V, X, Y because Bassitt takes all the W’s for getting back on the mound. Multiple fractures on the melon and walking out to the mound got me all choked up, because I’ve had this stupid chicken bone stuck in my throat since Wednesday. Can you Heimlich yourself? Seriously, good for Bassitt, and I will absolutely love him again next year. He’s always so underrated, but now I wonder if he won’t be overrated a little because he took a screamer off his cantaloupe. Being 100% real, casual people have now heard of him so watch his draft price inflate. As for this year, meh, looks like he can only throw about 50 pitches.

Sean Murphy – 2-for-4 and his 17th homer. Too bad Mike Zunino’s doing that plus 14 homers, so what Murphy’s doing is less impressive, but not a bad 2nd catcher if you play in one of those S&M-type leagues.

Mitch Haniger – 1-for-4 and his 35th homer. Kinda wild year here from Haniger. About to start calling him Franmitch Hanigereyes cause he’s putting together some Vending Machine Steaks with big dongs.

Adam Wainwright – 4 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 3.05. Not smart to make a deal with the devil for 40 years, but negotiate deep into the night and leave off the last two weeks of the season.

Paul Goldschmidt – 3-for-5, 3 RBIs, and his 28th and 29th homer. Au pair Shizz!

Tyrone Taylor – 2-for-4, 5 RBIs and his 11th and 12th homer. More like Tyrone Power! Yes! A very hip, new reference!

Adrian Houser – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.34. Any team that has Woodruff, FreddyKBB and Burnes, honestly, shouldn’t be allowed to have two random starters like Houser and Lauer do as well as they’ve been doing. The Brewers’ humidor that turns baseballs into medicine balls has been worth its price in fantasy gold. Streamonator doesn’t like Houser’s next one, and I don’t know how much he’ll be pitching with the Brewers playoff-bound.

Ryan Mountcastle – 2-for-4 and his 31st homer, hitting .260. In a cockney accent, “Innit In ‘N Out?” Mountcastle questioned as he licked what appeared to be blood off a dead man’s finger, but might’ve been ketchup.

Austin Hays – 2-for-4, and his 22nd homer, hitting .257. Nowhere near the year Mullins had, but if Mullins wouldn’t have had that year, I would’ve been pumped to get this year from Hays.

Glenn Otto – 5 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 8.02. Kinda interested in Otto for 2022, especially when I consider he’ll be drafted around the 42nd round in Draft Champions leagues.

Austin Riley – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 32nd homer, and 3rd homer in the last three games. Maybe he is the NL MVP. *thought bubble above Grey’s head* “Is Grey being serious?” *thought bubble vanishes* Do I answer the thought bubble or just let it continue to think that?” *thought bubble above Grey’s head* “Man, this guy is stupid.” *thought bubble vanishes* That’s not cool, thought bubble.

Charlie Morton – 6 IP, 3 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.53 vs. Madison Bumgarner – 5 IP, 3 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.58. This matchup was billed as, “Morton/Madison, say that fast 117 times.” By the by, ya know what Bumgarner could use? A trade to the Rays or Cards. He’d be a 2.75 ERA pitcher immediately.

Connor Overton – 2 2/3 IP, 4 ER, ERA at 2.51 vs. Aaron Nola – 6 IP, 6 ER, ERA at 4.64. Overton moved the window and Nola still jumped out of it. Nola’s gonna be such a complicated guy to rank in 2022. I can see the bounce back, but I also can see the ‘why the hell would you bother?’ There’s so many other fish in the sea.

Colin Moran – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 9th homer. Also, in this game, Ke’Bryan Hayes (1-for-4, 3 RBIs) and his 6th homer. Both homers off some scrub named Nola. If you could have Framber Valdez or Nola in 2022, why would you bother with Nola?

Mike Yastrzemski – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 24th homer, hitting .222. Might have to look at Carl’s Jr. Jr. for a sleeper post next year. Cust kayin’.

Yu Darvish – 5 1/3 IP, 4 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 4.21. Last two earned runs were tacked on from a shizzy reliever, but still it was such a whatever year from Darvish. Bums me out thinking he might be at the end of his line for productive pitching. Was a good run, if this is it. *checks Terms of Service box to give banking information to Russian hackers on the virtual ‘lighter’ app so I can wave it in the air to honor Darvish*

Ha-Seong Kim – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 7th homer. This was his 1st start since September 10th. Eminem gives Kim more play.

Trent Grisham – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 15th homer. Ya know, not only did 2020 give us a false sense of guys who are bad (Kris Bryant) but it also gave us a false sense of confidence in other guys.

Nick Gordon – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 4th homer, and I can’t believe I’m about to say it for this schmohawk but hot schmotato alert!

Michael Pineda – 5 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.73. Streamonator likes his next start, and it’s vs. the Tigers, and I agree. He may not go 80+pitches, but he’s worth a flyer if desperate.

Alex Cobb – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.46. Cobbs feels like a streaming musical chair. He could be fine, or the music could stop and you go to sit down on a chair and instead you sit on a Cobb.

Max Scherzer – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 2.28. C’mon, it’s kinda funny that some random starts in Coors in September might cost Scherzer and Buehler the Cy Young.

Max Muncy – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 35th homer. Yesterday, frequent commenter, Uncle Razzkai suggested a fantasy league where you could only field a team of guys who all had the same name. Dodgers have taken that suggestion to the Max.

Raimel Tapia – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 6th homer, hitting .272. Interesting that Bud Black decided to start playing Tapia again, after benching him for two weeks. I’d kinda love to know what Bud Black thinks on certain subjects, but I’m also worried if I know I may never stop laughing. If he said something like, “I wanted to get Blackmon some rest, so I went with Tapia,” I may never stop cackling.

Michael Kopech – 2 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 3.57, as he started the 2nd half of the doubleheader. Too bad he didn’t start the 2nd half of the 2nd half of the doubleheader so he could have a chance for a win.

Andrew Vaughn – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs as he was activated from the IL. He recovered quickly from “some fake injury the White Sox made-up to rest him.”

Tim Anderson – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 15th and 16th homer. Currently, writing up my year-end recaps that will be posted after the season ends, and Anderson has been solid, but the shortstops are so deep. The Player Rater for the shortstop position goes, like, 25 deep, and Anderson is barely above the halfway point.

Eloy Jimenez – 1-for-4 and his 9th homer. Eloy’s been in a terrible slump prior to this doubleheader, and I would’ve said he was droppable, but just that fast guys can come out of it.

Luis Robert – 2-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer. Sign me up for Lou Bob in all my 2022 leagues. How early will be the only question. Is there any such thing as too early? Methinks not as metalks like a leprechaun.

Bobby Bradley – 2-for-5 and his 15th homer. Bobby is King of the Hill. Hank’s good too. Oh my God, and Boomhau–Oh, Bobby Bradley? Yeah, he’s fine, if he’s hot, which he kind is; that was two games in a row with a homer. He won’t be in this afternoon’s Buy column, but he’s here now.

Aaron Civale – 1 2/3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 3.90. This was only a 7-inning doubleheader, so he actually got deeper into the game than you might think. Makes you feel better, right?

84 Comments
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Mr. Dootypants
Mr. Dootypants
10 months ago

Carlos Hernandez KC @ DET vs Mize. Will Carlos give me the K’s I need without destroying my slim grip on ERA and WHIP? What say you Fantasy Master Lothario?

TC
TC
10 months ago

Would you give Cole and Lindor in a 10 team keep 15 roto league for Bichette? I’d still have Scherzer, Woodruff, Webb as starters

Same league. Cole for Teoscar and Trevor Rogers?

Tim Na
Tim Na
10 months ago

Thanks again for all the help this year. I’m in the h2h final and I’ve got 2 moves left. Which of these stud pitching options would you pick? We use K, whip, era and quality starts.
Bubic vs Det, Mejia vs LAD, Dunning vs Bal, Blackburn vs Hou
Slim pickings but I’m trying to grab the Sunday starters that are still available.

JP
JP
10 months ago

on the verge of being bounced, looking for a hot stream today for my offense in a re-draft:

Pickup Dylan Carlson over Renfroe, Bregman, Justin Turner or Starling Marte (I’m way behind in steals)? Mainly need Avg and XBH

Sano Chance in Hell
Sano Chance in Hell
10 months ago

One remaining stream for H2H playoff week (6×6 with QS), who do you prefer?

Wily Peralta v. KC
Jaime Barria v. Sea
Zac Gallen v LAD

Thanks!

Skufer
10 months ago

Pick up Wily Peralta(vs Royals) or Jordan Lyles(@Baltimore) ??

Skufer
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Is Lyles worth starting at Baltimore tho?
He could be a solid stream with a chance at a QS.
What do you think ?
Thanks for the advice.

VinWins
VinWins
10 months ago

Dakota Hudson back less than a year after TJ surgery.

VinWins
VinWins
10 months ago

A closer look at the Pert standings shows Son is still scoring 54 of 60 pitching points. He will lose a few more though.

Shopgurrrl
Shopgurrrl
10 months ago

John Means or Eric Lauer for one extra spot start in the championship? ??

Shopgurrrl
Shopgurrrl
Reply to  Shopgurrrl
10 months ago

Or is there another sneaky recommendation who’s widely available and starting either today or Saturday?

Shopgurrrl
Shopgurrrl
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Means has TEX, Lauer has NYM

Norman Ginsberg
Norman Ginsberg
10 months ago

I have 1 more move this week, and I’m in “decent” (65%) shape but still wary.

1. Who’s my add. I now have no bench bat (and no Util until Wander activated). The only available waiver bat is Eddie Rosario. And possible SPs are Baz; Skubal; and Tyler Anderson.
– Baz (Mia +$16); Anderson (Sea +$4); Skubal (KC +$10). or Eddie Rosario?

And who’s my cut? It would be an SP that doesn’t start until next week (Elieser; Cole Irvin; or Carlos Hernandez). i.e., preparing for next week — and no stellar match. Their upcoming starts & SON value:
– Eieser (@ NYM. $0)
– Hernandez (@Sea. $1)
– Irvin (CLE. -$8); also has possible start vs Hou (-$16) last game of year (value if I need Ks).

I’m leaning ELIESER for ROSARIO.

Skufer
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

I’m hesitating in dropping Bregman. He has been straight garbage recently. Have Dalbec and Mondesi with 3b eligibility. Worth dropping Bregman and his struggles for a streaming arm.
In semifinals. I’m in a dilemma.
Please help me with some advice.

Skufer
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Thanks.

Norman Ginsberg
Norman Ginsberg
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Elieser confirms my “analysis” (sic), thanks.

Bench bat vv arm is the basis for my main question. I’m assuming the bat (guys on playoff teams rest); and fear that someone will take Rosario in next two days) but wondered if you value a bench bat as highly as me.

I’m thinking/risking that I will probably win w/o an additional pitcher, but who knows (e.g., I’m one win ahead and ratios always if-fy).

BTW, I also have Tanner Houck (hoping for potential vulture win), and he’s scheduled to start vs Baltimore late next week. I assume Elieser a more reasonable drop for now.

Norman Ginsberg
Norman Ginsberg
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

I probably don’t NEED the start, but it would alleviate some risk.

I also don’t NEED a bench bat, but guys e.g., K Marte often take days off. So also alleviates some risk.

Obviously a guessing game. I guessed two years ago when I benched Mallex Smith (who got a steal) for a better hitter — opponent got 3 steals the last day and I lost the final by 1 steal.

Norman Ginsberg
Norman Ginsberg
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

I probably don’t NEED the start, but it would alleviate some risk.

I also don’t NEED a bench bat, but guys e.g., K Marte often take days off. So also alleviates some risk.

Obviously a guessing game. I guessed two years ago when I benched Mallex Smith (who got a steal) for a better hitter — opponent got 3 steals the last day and I lost the final by 1 steal.

joeurso1
joeurso1
10 months ago

Your boy’s Scott White and his “predicting the 2022 draft” article has Yu Darvish at #20. That’s #20 overall. Not #20 SP. I’ll leave that here for comment.

joeurso1
joeurso1
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

For our sake, let’s hope it’s not.

Danny
Danny
10 months ago

Next week is championship week. Sadly might have to drop Lourdes. Just don’t know how long he’ll be out with 2 stitches in hand.

Danny
Danny
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Prayer circle

VinWins
VinWins
10 months ago

Finished off my starts in another league. 3.70 ERA/35 K/1 Win. Houser, Freeland, and Cobb all had a chance for a win, but it was Zac Lowther that got me my only W. Didn’t mind losing the Houser win, though.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Yeah, negative was I was building around Wainwright.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Yes, I’ve had much worse.

It’s going to be harder in the RCL with inning-limit. If you need saves, you have to wait, and who knows who will pitch and how many innings they’ll throw the last few days.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Yeah, you’re too picky. Of course, your league is much more competitive, so fewer mediocre choices.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Pretty amazing. Though, part of his lead was built on having used more innings early. And she still has 72 innings left.

Michael B
Michael B
10 months ago

Nickon, dylan moore, Tapia, gavin lux, or hunter Dozier

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

The man, NICK GORDON!!!

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

I’m guessing. He’s great, though.

Michael b
Michael b
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

It was lagging for me and I typed nick gordon Gordon for some reason and tried deleting the second gordon, must have clicked before the second “on” in gordon and deleted too much cause of lag. But yes I meant nick gordon

Babe Ruth's Ball Sweat
Babe Ruth's Ball Sweat
10 months ago

Nola got whacked again last nite.. how someone with such great stuff keeps getting lit up is one of the great mysteries of our time.
He lines up for Braves next week.. Drop for Gilbert (facing Angels, Oakland)?

spanks for the mammaries

toolshed
toolshed
10 months ago

Soto really salvaged his season after a rough start due to that shoulder issue. He is now #2 on the player rater in my league (obp league). Leading the league in walks and has more walks than K. Watching him continue to go oppo and drive the ball with authority the other way is so impressive. He does it so effortlessly and the ball carries when he does it.

Hyun-Jin & Juice
Hyun-Jin & Juice
10 months ago

12 team, 5×5 roto

Which of these streams do you like? I can start all. ERA/WHIP very important.

Logan Gilbert @LAA ($7)
Tyler Anderson @LAA ($4.1)
Shane Baz v. MIA ($15.7)
Marco Gonzales @LAA ($0.4)

Norman Ginsberg
Norman Ginsberg
10 months ago

Lourdes was spiked in a collision. XRays were negative, but he needed 2 stitches in right middle finger. Ouch! (bad pub). I’m assuming this means, at best, a few days off, agreed?

BigEasy
BigEasy
10 months ago

Thanks for all your work this season!

Fighting for a first place finish and need a few more saves.

Pick one: Steckenrider, Floro, Estevez, Stratton, J. Barlow

daniel cabrera fan 40
daniel cabrera fan 40
10 months ago

Dear FML, you can perform the Heimlich on yourself. Clutch your fist with the other hand like you normally would, then put your clutched hands against yourself, then put your weight on those hands over a chair/small wall/dumpster/whatever.

Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
10 months ago

Soto picked the perfect time to hit the NAS as Dom Toreto would say! (H2H playoff finals).

Ante GALIC
Ante GALIC
10 months ago

Grey!!!

Fab, like the Fab 4.

a. Have a nice weekend!

b. Norm MacDonald quote of the day for September 24, 2021

‘In Washington, a 410-pound convicted killer is fighting his execution on constitutional grounds. He claims that when hanged his head will be completely torn from his body, which would amount to cruel and unusual punishment. Now having your head completely torn off your body is cruel, I tell you, but is it all that unusual?

c. Marx Brothers quote of the day for September 24, 2021

‘When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face. That’s the price she has to pay.’

[talking to Mrs. Claypool]

Groucho, A Night at the Opera

Cheers,
Ante

Ante Galic
Ante Galic
Reply to  Grey
10 months ago

Grey!!

I hoped you’d like that one. I kept it back especially for today.

Good luck with the BUY column.

Cheers,
Ante

The Harrow
The Harrow
Reply to  Ante GALIC
10 months ago

i remember that one from weekend update.