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I was a history major in college.  This was a terribly poor decision.  I realized after my first year in history/secondary education that I did not really enjoy history.  I was gonna be a coach.  My only A’s in college were coaching classes.  Why did I think that history was interesting?  Who would ever read stuff like that just for the fun of it?

As I’ve grown older, I realized that there is some history that I enjoy.  I just don’t enjoy ALL of it.   It’s all good, I was only a Social Studies teacher for two years before I took a different type of position.  The lesson is to never listen to your parents, I guess.

For a time, I felt the same about dynasty baseball leagues.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Matt Olson wasted no time starting Atlanta’s rout of the Marlins on Friday night with a soaring 424-foot two-run bomb in the first inning to put his team ahead 3-0. The Braves never looked back, and Olson’s teammates did their best to match Matt’s power stroke, “Oh, we’re really doing this are we?” That was […]

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What’s the German word for “everyone knows a person is cheating but the umps just want the game to end?” Schaden-fraud feels too perfect like. Dot dot dot. What else was perfect last night? Oh, yeah, Domingo German (9 IP, 9 Ks, ERA at 4.54). How about a German word for I just dropped him in all my leagues because he gave up 10 runs in his last freakin’ start? Uberidiot? Prolly Uberidiöt, because the Germans like that an umlaut. This was the first perfect game since F-Her in 2012, and there were three in 2012. By the way, if you haven’t seen the movie, Tár, it was great. It’s about German’s hands when he’s pitching.

Dane Dunning was supposed to be the lede, but he’ll have to settle for co-lede. He was holding his hands in front of his mouth, screaming like a teenager, “Me?! I get a Razzball lede?! Oh my God!” You come within one out of a complete game shutout with 10 Ks? Yes, you get a lede. Step right up. *begins the formal pat down that every player goes through* I’m sorry, when I tell you to cough, you have to cough otherwise I’ll get arrested, okay? What, you thought you just had to perform well? Ha, silly, you Dane Dunning! So, Dane Dunning (8 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 10 Ks, ERA at 2.69) should actually be used to the Razzball spotlight. This might come as surprise to some of youse, but I liked Dunning so much I included him in starters to target two years ago, and he wasn’t great. His peripherals were fine, but his ratios were laggards. He doesn’t have a great fastball (90 MPH), but he barely throws it. He’s figured out his pitch mix, though; he has a great cutter and has nearly doubled its usage. A great cutter? Yup, solid ground ball rates. Dane Dunning is a poor man’s Gausman. Call him Petrolman. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Turning on the TV, oh, lucky, it’s my favorite movie, Beaches. Wow, Barbara Hershey being selfless and allowing Bette Midler to shine. It’s so beautiful…Oh my God, what are these wet things on my cheeks? I’m crying tears of laughter and sadness that only the movie Beaches can elicit. Now, I am cutting pictures of Ohtani and Reid Detmers (7 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 3.77) out of a magazine and pasting their heads on the TV. Now Reid Detmers is Hershey, and Ohtani, of course, is Bette. Detmers is cold in Ohtani’s shadow. Anyone would be, Ohtani is one of the best of all-time, like Bette, so you can’t compete with that, but Detmers can cheer on his friend, and have an 11.1 K/9, 3.4 BB/9, and 3.64 xFIP. He also has a 13.3% Swinging Strike rate. You know who else has a 13.3% Swinging Strike rate (at least they both did going into yesterday)? For one night, Bette wasn’t better. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Told you in Friday’s Buy column the Orioles were calling up their top prospect. I just forgot to include top infield prospect. Well, excuse me! I blame Itch. If he wasn’t so busy making casual death threats, he’d be on this! So, Itch had Jordan Westburg in his last prospects to stash report, and, on June 11th, he said, “Has 33 home runs and 14 stolen bases in 143 Triple-A games, which feels like a lot of Triple-A games for a first-round pick who’s slashing .305/.383/.601 on his return to the level, and I’d like to level Grey.” C’mon, man! I imagine Cowser will be up soon too, because, honestly, what are they doing in the minors? It makes no season. As Itch said, Westburg being in Triple-A that long is absurd, and so is Cowser. I tried to grab Westburg in every league, and failed. Let’s go! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

14.4% walk rate. That stands out as the difference between young players, who have promise, and what Gunnar Henderson (3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer) has done. Thinking back to when Keston Hiura appeared to be a top prospect. He flamed out with a walk rate half of Gunnar’s. Gunnar Henderson just went through conceivably the most difficult stretch of his young career, and did it with a 14.4% walk rate. That’s remarkable. Most vets can’t do that. It’s common sense: A player struggles and starts swinging at everything and spirals out of control until they’re asking, “Is the whole team going to Golden Corral tonight?” as they stand in line for minor league meal vouchers. Yesterday, Gunnar hit the longest home run in Camden Yards history; it reached the street, then rolled to Hamsterdam. Since June, he’s hit .458 with four homers. He has a higher OPS than Kyle Tucker, Schwarber, Jul-Rod and Machado, to name a few. In the last month, he’s hitting near-.300 with a .265 ISO. To me, the most impressive number is still 14.4%. Gunnar sounds like a viking backwards and forwards, and you Cnut ask for more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

With Dustin May injured and Julio Urias hitting the Ineffective List — Urias should be healthy when he stops giving up four homers per game — the Dodgers needed another arm besides Gavin Stone. I opened with that because when I saw the Dodgers were calling up Bobby Miller they be Gavin me a heart attack that they weren’t calling up Stone. I need Stone. Yes, this is about me. Stone has been confirmed for Monday, but Miller’s up for Tuesday. Here’s what Itch’s said, “Where I prefer Gavin Stone, most who care enough to rank ‘em seem to prefer Miller, a 6’5” 220 lb prototype power pitcher. While the 6’1” 175 lb Stone doesn’t win any off-the-bus intimidation contests, he repeats his delivery with ease, which is necessary to maintaining plus command. Miller has mostly looked like a reliever to the eye test, but he looks different now than he did on draft night. He bounced back and forth a bit between relieving and starting at Louisville and retained remnants of a max-effort, off-balance delivery throughout much of his minor league career. It’s pretty smooth and steady now, so I can’t really quibble with anyone who’d prefer the fastball-slider dynamite Miller brings to the mound, and I’d like to stick a piece of dynamite up Grey’s butt.” What on earth? As Itch says, Stone and Miller is likely a toss-up, but this isn’t like mortar and pestle, and why not both? Choose one and go with him. Will Bobby Miller be better than Bryce or Mason Miller? He could. Oh, and so many West Coast Millers. Angels and San Diego, you’re on the clock. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?