Yesterday, Gabriel Ynoa threw a gem, 8 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.41 in just under 32 IP.  His name is pronounced EE-know-a.  As they say, the more you EE-know-a.  Ynoa was only at 94 pitches, so don’t you let Ynoa try for the complete game?  I mean, Ynot?  He looks like a number five starter, though on the Orioles that likely means a number three starter.  He can touch mid-90’s with his fastball, but he’s missing a decent breaking ball and tends to get beat up by lefties, like Fox News.  Though, better things may await him because the Mets traded him away.  He will likely come up a little short of the Mets’ all-time worst trade of Nolan Ryan, and even their 2nd worst trade of Amos Otis to the Royals for a prospect with a giant baseball head.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Manny Machado – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 33rd homer, hitting .264.  What a recovery from an awful season.  Ma-Ma mia!    If only the BABIP Gods shined their prematurely balding heads down on Odor.  Eff you, BABIP Gods!

Matt Andriese – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 4.44.  Nothing but a streamer at this point, and the Stream-o-Nator says he’s not for his next one, so, it’s not Andriese’s fault, but buh-bye.

Justin Turner – Left after being hit on the thumb by a pitch.  He says he should be fine, as he gingerly put ice on it.  Though, everything he does is gingerly.

Kenta Maeda – 3 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 4.25.  Damn, the Dodgers went into shutdown mode early this year, huh?  Not sure if Maeda’s going to get another start, but you can’t trust him to throw more than a few innings, even if he does.

Curtis Granderson – 1-for-3 and his 25th homer, and his 2nd homer in the last four games, while hitting around .220, which is a hot streak for him.  If you need power, I could see trying him.  He won’t be in this afternoon’s Buy column, as this is merely your Curtisy reminder.

Mark Leiter Jr. – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 4.69.  First, to address the elephant in the room, yes, it is weird that Al Leiter named his kid, Mark, and added the Jr. suffix.  Leiter Jr.’s peripherals are actually interesting, but that’s neither here nor there, or there nor here, or–Now I’m confused!  The Stream-o-Nator doesn’t love his next start, but it’s against a Nats team that could be resting people, and I could see it in some instances.

Nick Williams – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 11th homer, hitting .285.  Here’s a guy that will likely go undrafted in most 12-team mixed leagues and shallower next year, and I could see him making an impact, like Edward James Olmos in a limited role.

Dexter Fowler – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 6th steal, hitting .270.  He’ll be in this afternoon’s Buy column, because I’ve mentioned him five times this week due to his hot hitting, so may as well go for six.  The number six makes me giggle.  Sounds so taboo.  Six, hehe.

Tommy Pham – 2-for-4, 1 run and his 22nd steal, hitting .311.  There’s seven guys in the majors with a 20/20 season.  Only two in the NL, Pham and Wil Myers.  Phamtablous!

Phillip Ervin – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 3rd homer, hitting .295.  What a coincidence that he homered off Carlos Martinez (6 1/3 IP, 4 ER, 10 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.63).  Ya know, because Carlos Martinez got busted for liking porn on Twitter and this guy is P-Ervin.

Scott Schebler – 2-for-5 and his 28th and 29th homer, hitting .236, as he hit leadoff, because Bryan Price shrugged all over his lineup card.

Raisel Iglesias – 1 IP, 2 ER, a day after complaining of flu-symptoms.  He might still have the sniffles, because he sure is coughing up runs!  C’mon, high five me!  No?  Okay.

R.A. Dickey – 8 IP, 2 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.32.  Someone with some free time, or who is in jail, should look back at the ERA in the major leagues in the last two weeks of September in the last ten years, because it feels like offense has dried up completely in the last few days as starting hitters are being rested.

Tanner Roark – 7 IP, 3 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 4.41.  Continued from the Dickey blurb, you can’t throw a rock and not hit a Quality Start.  You can’t throw The Rock, period.  Don’t try either, he’s the Dems’ 2020 nominee!

Ryan Zimmerman – 1-for-3 and his 34th homer.  If the person is reading who said Zimmerman would avoid a DL stint all year, please remind me in the comments, so I can send you a Razzball t-shirt.

Joe Mauer – 3-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI, hitting .311.  He has the sixth best batting average in the AL, and the third best OBP (.388).  There’s only ten guys in the majors with a .400 OBP, which is sad, but there were only seven guys last year, so baby steps, Bob.

Domingo Santana – 2-for-5, 2 runs and a slam (28) and legs (14), hitting .281, and now three straight games with a home run.  More like Martes-Jueves Santana, and he should go up to bat to, There It Go (The Whistle Song).

Zach Davies – 7 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.84.  His next start is home vs. the Reds, and the Stream-o-Nator doesn’t love it.  Before you think SON has head marbles, Davies went into yesterday’s game with a home ERA of 6+.   Cust kayin’.

Kyle Schwarber – 1-for-2 and his 29th homer, hitting .208.  “No, it had nothing to do with Schwarber, Ma!  I was getting you vanilla ice cream from Dairy Queen.  That’s why there’s sticky white stains on the car seats.”  That’s Joe Buck.

Jake Arrieta – 5 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.43, as he returned from hamstring tightness.  That start is about as meh as it gets.  The mehiest.  King Too-meh-a-meh from the Island of Meh-ee?  Smoking the meh-ee-wow-ee?  Okay, I’ll stop.  I doubt Arrieta goes much deeper in his next start as the Cubs ready for the playoffs.

Dallas Keuchel – 6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.96.  I’ll go over this more in the Sell that’s coming later today, but, in H2H leagues that go next week, you really have to drill down to see if even your aces are worth holding.  Daylass Koochel goes to Arlington, but who knows how many innings he’s even going to throw.

Tim Anderson – 1-for-4 and his 17th homer, hitting over .400 in the month of September.  He was in last week’s Buy, and he will be in this week’s.  There’s no replacements for Tim, not musically speaking.

Robinson Cano – 1-for-4 and his 22nd homer, hitting .284.  Next year he goes 27 HR, .300 or 18 HRs, .270.  Like Altuve getting the cereal, I’m going for the latter.

James Paxton – 3 2/3 IP, 2 ER, ERA at 3.03, as he returned from injury.  He could see two more starts this year, or a total of seven innings.  Let’s see if he can stay healthy!

Adrian Beltre – 2-for-4 and his 17th homer, hitting .314.  For a guy who is 38 years old that only played in 88 games and has never received any encouraging head pats, he’s not having a terrible year.

Cole Hamels – 8 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.80.  This year is the year before the wheels fell off on F-Her.  Hey, that sounds like the beginning of a romance novel written by Chad Gaudin.  Google “Chad Gaudin gurney” if you don’t remember.

Clayton Richard – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks, ERA at 4.63.  It’s called a Hodgepadre, it’s in the dictionary, look it up.

Mike Minor – 1 IP, 0 ER and the save, ERA at 2.68.  Ugh, I could’ve used that save.  Why didn’t Ned Yost use him when Herrera immediately went down two weeks ago when I had Minor?  Guess the Yost’s on me.  No reason why Minor can’t be the closer for the rest of the year, so I’d grab him if you’re into those sorta things.

J.A. Happ – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 6 Ks, ERA at…Guess.  Go ahead.  Wait, I’ll give you a hint.  He’s owned in only 55% of leagues.  Gotta be a 4.50+ ERA, right?  It’s 3.64.  Zoinks!  His opponent last night, Jason Vargas (6 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks) is owned in more leagues with a 4.03 ERA.  I know, ERA’s not everything, but, ya know, Happ’s got more Ks too.

Francisco Lindor – 1-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 32nd homer.  He’s killing it like T.J. Lavin in the 2nd half with 18 HRs, 10 SBs and hitting near-.310.  He definitely played a part in that 22-game straight win streak.  Excuse me, 22-game cisgender win streak.

Edwin Encarnacion – 1-for-4 and his 37th homer.  Nothing comes between Edwin and a 35+ home run year, not even his Calvins.

Danny Salazar – 2 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 4 Ks, ERA at 4.48.  Seems to be headed for the 2nd year in a row where he’s going to work out of the bullpen in the playoffs.  Gonna be real hard to justify drafting him next year in all but the deepest leagues, i.e. K-zar is an emperor with no clothes, and he’s leaving his balls up.

Jacob deGrom – Pushed back to Sunday due to flu-like symptoms, nausea and an upset stomach.  Mets trainers gave him a bottle of Windex to chug for his stomach and a pile of fake vomit for his nausea.  Those Mets trainers are the best!

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5 years ago

Better for OPS dynasty (16-team) Arcia or T. Anderson?

Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@iChiro: @Grey: Sorry about the comment below this. This is what happens when I start typing at 9, and finish at 12.

5 years ago

Finally overtook 1st place in my 10 team Roto keeper, and up by 2.5 pts with 10 days to play! Only $1 left, but your Razzball buys have carried me to the top. Hope I can keep it there!

Abe Froman
Abe Froman
5 years ago

In a keep forever league, which 2 of these would you drop? Need to make room with some guys coming off the DL

Ian Desmond

5 years ago

Fowler, Tim Anderson, or Altherr ROS?

5 years ago

10 team Yahoo H2H 7×7

(3) SP: deGrom, Severino, Bauer
(2) RP: Knebel, Ramos
(4) P: Hand, Betances, Ryu, Corbin
(6) Bench: Morton, Weaver, Snell, Marquez, Chacin, Manaea

SO I just dropped McHugh and a streamer (Anderson) to pick up Manaea and Chacin for tomorrow but the plan was to also stream Boyd vs. MIN (1.4) tomorrow…

I’m already starting these guys tomorrow so obviously I can’t drop any of these:

Manaea vs. TEX (16.0)
Ryu vs. SF (15.2)
Chacin vs. COL (13.8)
Morton vs. LAA (10.2)

In order to stream Boyd I’ll have to drop either a RP from my staff or one of the following SP below… I tried to include their next starts to help but I have a feeling it’s gonna be Snell? Of course next week’s matchups don’t matter if I don’t win this week!

Marquez @SD (14.4)
Corbin vs. MIA (1.3)

Next Week:

Weaver vs. CHC (7.0)

Snell @NYY (-5.0)

deGrom vs. ATL (29.0)
Severino vs. TB (22.5)

Bauer vs. MIN (9.2)
Morton @BOS (-9.3)

Weaver vs. MIL (16.0)

Snell vs. BAL (19.0)

5 years ago

If McHugh starts over McCullers on Sunday at home versus LAA (Skaggs), do you prefer him over Giolito v KC (Gaviglio)?

Jason Murray
Jason Murray
5 years ago

Trying to close out a championship this weekend. I need 6 starters and have used SON to limit my choices to:

Gray @ SD
Cole vs. STL
Archer @ BAL
Berrios @ DET
Corbin vs. MIA
Marquez @ SD
Perdomo vs. COL

Archer, Berrios, and Cole make me nervous, but I’ve been burned by sitting my studs before. Which of these SPs doesn’t make the cut this weekend? Thanks!

Jason Murray
Jason Murray
Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@Grey: I could grab Taillon vs. STL, Boyd vs. MIN, Gohara vs. PHI, or Skaggs @ HOU (look like the best options) off the waiver wire to replace Archer and/or Berrios. Any improvement there?

5 years ago

Is it safe to start Bauer @Sea (Ramirez) and Wacha @Pit (Nova) today?

Peter guigli
5 years ago

Where has malamoney been? grey would like to invite you, Ralph , malamoney into a league next year for people living in the northeast mostly New England. So I could entertain once in a while at my home in ma.
home. Outsiders are welcome like snowman or Len just owners that love razzball. As far as concept I’m open to anything

Peter guigli
Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@Grey: from Framingham now living in weymouth

5 years ago

Domingo a top 50 guy in 2018? Still young and getting better.

5 years ago

10 team OBP h2h

I have 1 move left and am looking at either picking up a starter or a closer. I am up 1 win and down 1 save.

With 1 move remaining, I have 8 remaining starts and 4 closers going. My opponent, with 5 remaining moves, has 5 starts and 2 closers going.

Here are best starter options:

Bettis @SD (Chacin)
Fister @CIN (Jackson)
Pivetta @ATL (Gohara)
Gohara vPHI (Pivetta)
Taillon vSTL (Gant)
Giolito vKC (Gaviglio)
Perez @OAK (TBA)
Straily @ARZ (Corbin)
McCullers* vLAA (Skaggs)

*probable, but could be McHugh

Best closers: Brach, Nicasio, Parker, Minor, Barraclough

I’m thinking I should probably pick up a starter and hope my closers can close the gap. Whether I would even get a save from one of these guys is no guarantee (Minor is the only reliever with more than one save in the past week). As for starters, I’m probable leaning towards Giolito right now. Not a huge fan of his but is facing a below average offense and a weak opposing starting pitcher. Perez and Taillon could be other options and who knows how deep McCullers will even go.


5 years ago

I’m up 2-0 in wins and 2-1 in Quality Starts. Losing in K’s, but winning in ERA, WHIP, and K/9. My opponent is streaming every day and is streaming Wacha and Garret Richards tonight.

I got Carrasco, Duffy, and Ed-Rod all going tomorrow–he currently has no one but will stream. Debating streaming Estrada v. NYY or Lackey @ MIL tonight. Do you like either?

Another option is to just wait to see how tonight shakes out with his streamers and pick up one of the following to stream tomorrow with either Morton (v. LAA), Ryu (vs. SF), Chacin (v. COL), Manaea (v. TEX), or Boyd (v. MIN)

Any advice is much appreciated!

Reply to  Grey
5 years ago


Thank you, who would be your second choice if I need to stream 2? Morton?

Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@Grey: lackey’s FIP in 18IP this month is 3.42. Definitely risky but he’s trending toward being better as the season closes.

5 years ago

Thanks again for all the hard work and laughs you’ve provided this season. You, once again, have me in the semifinals.

Looking ahead to next week (hopefully in the championship game), can you help me with my pitchers please? I have good options.

H2H / Weekly starts

Obviously starting:

Ray vs SF ($18.6)
Wood vs SD ($25.8)
Tanaka vs TB ($13.6)

Please choose 2:

CMart vs CHC ($9.6) and vs MIL ($19.3)
Weaver vs CHC ($7) and vs MIL ($16)
Clevenger vs MIN ($3.2) and vs CWS ($18.7)
Berrios vs DET ($10.7)

5 years ago

Did the Padres switch leagues? Wil Myers is .242/28/72/20…

5 years ago

Last weekend of the season playing for the ‘ship (thanks Grey!) Which hitter would you bench tonight if you had to choose one?

Lamb vs. Conley
Eddie Rosario vs. Norris
Smoak vs. Tanaka
ODB vs. Newcomb

Thanks for all the funnies & insights this year. It made a pretty brutal fantasy season somewhat tolerable.

Raji May
Raji May
5 years ago

Hi Grey,

h2h 6×6 playoffs and pitching is pretty tight , can stream 2 of the following for tomorrow:

– Manaea @ home v. TEX (SON $16.0)
– Chacin @ home v. COL (SON $13.9)
– Walker @ home v. MIA (SON $-1.9)

Stick with SON and go Manaea and Chacin?


Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
5 years ago

Which 2 guys you starting today? Thanks!

Devers @ Romano ($20.2)

Rosario @ Norris ($3.5)

Upton @ Verlander ($12)

Machado v Cobb ($48.4)

Roger Anderson
Roger Anderson
Reply to  Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
5 years ago

@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: I would say, Rosario and Machado. DET was/is handing out runs like Halloween candy, and Machado may be hot and the last 10 days particularly to preserve his lifetime totals. I like Upton but the Angels seem set on dropping out of the WC race and Devers looks cold to me.

5 years ago

h2h 6×6 playoffs. my opponent has 65 IP to my 38 so far. he’s leading me in QS (6-4) and K (65-36.). I’m leading in ERA (1.89-3.43), WHIP (0.71-1.10), k/bb (4.00-3.10), and SV (4-2).

my staff for rest of week is verlander v laa, Gibson @ det, sonny @ tor, Teheran v phi, duffy @ chw, and Quintana @ mil. He has greinke v mia, ryu v sf, manaea @ tex, mchugh v laa, and mad max @ nym.

I think I’m going to start verlander tonight and bench gibson while trying to protect my leads in the ratios for the remainder of the week. You agree?

I’d be much more comfortable with this strategy if he didn’t have studs like greinke and max. If verlander gets smacked around I’ll have to most likely run everyone out there remainder of the week. But anticipating Verlander and Greinke both pitch well tonight, I’ll have to do this same exercise Sat and Sun. are there any other of my SPs (sonny gray, Teheran, duffy, Quintana) that you’d consider must sits if my ratio leads stay in place and I just punt Ks and QS?

I beat this guy h2h during regular season so I only need to tie him to move on.

thanks grey. you da man!

Bob Sacamano
Bob Sacamano
5 years ago

I was taken aback by the BMX reference, but after Googling, I see TJ Lavin is the host of some show now? Interesting.

Jeffrey Gilden
Jeffrey Gilden
5 years ago

Hey Grey –

First, thank you. Thank you. You’ve been so helpful this year. I’m currently leading in my league’s final, and your help has been invaluable.

My last questions for the year (I hope).

I’m waiting to see how my opponent lines up his starts and relievers next week before I finalize my lineup, but I want to get a head start. Currently, I have:

SP: Sale, Anderson, Berrios, Cobb, Hendricks, Leake
RP (saves + holds): Jansen, Neris, Swarzak, Madson

The following are available for next week: Snell (2 starts), G Richards, Junis, CC. Any of these better options than what I have? I only picked up Leake for his two starts this week, so I’m guessing he’s droppable. Probably won’t start Berrios. I may not need 4 relievers, so I want to have starter options before the “better” ones are gone.

Also, I don’t need power. What about Mauer for the last week?


Jeffrey Gilden
Jeffrey Gilden
Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@Grey: Sorry I didn’t list those. here they are:

Sale v TOR, HOU (if he gets two)
Anderson @ STL
Hendricks @ STL
Berrios v DET
Cobb @ NYY
Leake @ LAA

Snell @ NYY, v BAL
Richards @ CWS
Junis v DET

Thanks again.

Scott Kimmel
Scott Kimmel
5 years ago


I am starting Verlander vs Angels at home, and Hill at home vs SF. Would you start Newcomb at home vs PHI?

Shane Quinn
Shane Quinn
5 years ago

No love for Big Willie Myers in the NL 20/20 club??

5 years ago

h2h 6×6 playoffs. my opponent has 48 IP to my 22 so far. he’s leading me in W (3-2), SV (3-0), K (43-17), and k/bb (2.69-2.43). I’m leading in ERA (5.16-5.21) and WHIP (1.46-1.53). my staff for rest of week is ubaldo v tb, richards @ hou, hill v sf, shark @ lad, estrada v NYY, lynn @ pit. Opponent has erasmo, boyd, ryu, morton, suter, and skaggs. He’s been streaming 1 to 2 guys each day.

Need streamers for tomorrow and sunday. Have 2 spots. For tomorrow is it worth using any of alvarez @ atl, bettis @ sd, Hellickson v TB, or covey v KC?

Options for sunday are stratton @ kershaw, Cotton v tex, gaviglio v giolito, gant v pit, pivetta @ atl, chad bell v MIN, jackson stephens v bos.

options for sat pretty lousy even tho i’m streaming so thinking i should just pick up 2 guys for sunday and beat my opponent to the punch. He’s been logging on just as yahoo flips days to pick up SPs so if ipick up 2 for sat and wait to swap them out to grab 2 for sun, he’ll beat me to the wire and pick up the 1 or 2 best options for sun. what do you think?

thanks grey

sall goooood man
sall goooood man
5 years ago

Shark @LAD tonight. Do we start him? He’s been (mostly) solid lately and Dodgers in cruise mode.

5 years ago

My money league gives a small award for having an MVP or Cy Young. I have Lindor. Has has hit himself into the MVP conversation?

Reply to  Hawk
5 years ago

@Hawk: Not likely, but what a year and what a future this kid has

Sock it to me
Sock it to me
5 years ago

I never get the JA Happ hate! He’s been very good the last couple of seasons

Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
5 years ago

That Altuve line also had me cracking up. Nicely done!

Domingo is looking mighty fine, particularly in my OBP OPS league format.

In a keep 5, might Senor Sunday be a better keeper at $5 than Harper at $58? Harper would probably go for around or a little above that price (he was 53 this year after his slow season).

Other 4 keepers are: $50 Goldy, $4 Severino, $5 Rhys, $13 Upton.

Other keeper options are Harper ($58) Domingo ($5) Machado ($48) Kershaw ($58) Olsen ($5) Devers ($5) or a bunch of cheap Nola/Clevinger types.

Reply to  Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
5 years ago

@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?:

I’d never keep a guy at a price I could get him back at. Severino, Rhys, Upton, Domingo, Devers for me.

Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
Duda Want to Build a Snowman?
5 years ago

“Everything he does is gingerly”

Shoop Da Whoop
Shoop Da Whoop
5 years ago

Fangraphs has Pujols at 89.3 career WAR, Beltre at 84.3. Pujols is pegged for -1.7 WAR this season, and it looks like he’ll carry negative value for the rest of his career. Meanwhile, Beltre had 3.0 WAR this season before last night’s game. In little more than half a season. And even though he’s a year older than Pujols, his defense is still top notch.

What are the chances Beltre passes Pujols in career WAR? 40%? I know we’re all about fantasy here, but it’s both fascinating and sad to see how far Pujols has fallen, and how resilient Beltre’s late career surge has been.

Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey
Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey
5 years ago

AL only, cargo 2 is back and salazar is getting jerked around. drop trumbo (been awful for a bit, and never really good at all this whole year) for cargo 2 IF he starts again tomorrow? teoscar could be the other drop. playoffs, OBP over AVG, total bases added, QS over wins, holds added
C chirinos
1B miggy
2B segura
SS correa
3B mostsuckass
MI escobar
CI devers
OF (4) k.davis/trumbo/mancini/kiermaier
util (1) chapman
BN teoscar
SP salazar/leake/peacock/snell/clevinger/morton/quintana/gibson
RP (4 slots) j.smith/giles/hildenberger/belisle
DL duffy

1. guess it’s just remedial to drop anybody but salazar to activate duffy and drop j.smith for hatcher

2. drop trumbo or teoscar for cargo 2?

Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey
Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey
Reply to  Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey
5 years ago

@Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey: 3. drop trumbo or teoscar for joyce (2 righties in a row, weak ones, and a 3rd on the 4th day)

5 years ago

Grey, you which streamer do you like the most for next week? H2H 5 cats + K/BB
Mengden vs Sea, maybe @Tex
Romano @Mil

CC vs KC, maybe Tor
Leiter Jr vs Wsh
Lugo @Atl, maybe @Phi
Gohara @Mia
They all seem to have similar peripherals (at least for September) but the bottom 4 guys listed have WHIP over 1.50 … Think Mengden is the safest bet at least at home? Brewers do K a lot but they are hit or miss..

Ante Galic
Ante Galic
5 years ago


Great write-up!

a. Still in Don Ameche. Leaving by road today to travel to Farchana, USA!

b. I hope my dissing of Manny may turn him on to hit well over the last week and half!

c. Best of Rambo quote of the day for September 22-24 (from Rambo III from the week of August 7)

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Have you decided to talk? No? Very well. Soon you will be my guest down the hall.

Rambo: ‘Come on. Go back!’

Afghan boy soldier: ‘No!’

Rambo: ‘Shhh! Go on. Stay here.’

Afghan boy soldier: ‘I know this place. You need me.’

Rambo: ‘I don’t need you dead. Go back!’

[Rambo and Musa Ghani use stealth and get to the Colonel’s holding cell. Musa Ghani and Rambo go separate ways to get to the same place. They set booby traps in different locations setting the timer in each location to go off in 10 minutes. Of course the Afghan boy soldier is following them both.]

Rambo (asking two women in prison): ‘The American? American.’

One of the imprisoned Afghan women: ‘[Speaking foreign language]. [She points in THAT direction].’

[Rambo gets to Colonel Trautman’s cell!]

Rambo: ‘Colonel? Colonel?’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John, how the hell did you get in here?’

Rambo: ‘Can you move?’

Colonel Trautman: ‘You’re damn right I can.’

Rambo: ‘Let’s go.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John, behind you!’

[Rambo prepares his knife but sees it’s the Afghan boy soldier. Then he sees a Russian soldier and launches the knife into his neck, saving the boy from for sure death.]

[In falling, the Russian soldier gets a shot off.]

Rambo (to the boy): ‘Go!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John! Get out! Get the hell out of here!’

[Lots of shooting takes place. Rambo escapes the prison with the Afghan boy soldier, both are wounded. Rambo finds Musa Ghani and they try to access the sewer system to flee the fort.]

Rambo: ‘Go on! Over here! Come on! Help me! Take him. Go on!’

Musa Ghani: ‘Give me the boy. Come on! Ok.’

Rambo: ‘Take the kid. Get down! Give me the boy.’

[Scene change in Colonel Trautman’s prison cell.]

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Who is this terrorist? What makes you so valuable to him? This bastard tried to destroy me tonight, but he failed! At sunrise, I’ll hunt him down and hang his skin on the wall!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘You don’t have to hunt him. He’ll find you.’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Are you insane? One man against thirty commandos? Who do you think this man is? God?’

Rambo: ‘No. God would have mercy. He won’t.’

Musa Ghani: ‘It’s all right. Nobody’s there. This will hold a while.’

Rambo: ‘What’s the fastest way out?’

Musa Ghani: ‘Northwest. There is trail between mountains…About 3 kilometers from here. The trail is very difficult.’

Rambo: ‘You take the boy and go. I want to stay.’

Musa Ghani: ‘You can’t. You cannot go back there. We must go to Pakistan.’

Rambo: ‘I’ve got to go back.’

Musa Ghani: ‘I know he’s your friend, but you cannot do this. You both will die. For what?’

Rambo: ‘Just do what I say. Let me have your gun. All right. Let’s go. Come on.’

Musa Ghani: ‘I see you again?’

Rambo: ‘Sure.’

[Rambo treats his own wound like he did in Rambo I, First Blood.]

[A massive manhunt is launched by Colonel Zaysen to find Rambo. Ground troops and helicopters are redeployed.]

[Rambo uses stealth and frees Colonel Trautman and everyone else imprisoned in the Russian prison.

Rambo: ‘Move! Move! Come on!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Can you fly that thing?’

Rambo: ‘Let’s find out. Let’s go! Hurry! Get on board!’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘[Speaking foreign language]’

Rambo: ‘Hold on!’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘[Speaking foreign language]’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Over there! There!

Rambo: ‘Hold on!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Get them!’

[One liberated Afghan falls out of the helicopter, holding on to the base of the helicopter for dear life.]

Colonel Trautman: ‘Take my hand!’

[Same liberated Afghan falls to his death below.]

[Rambo shoots up the gun tower and the two gun operators.]

Rambo: ‘We’re going down! Hold on!’

Passengers: ‘[Screaming]’

[Rambo lands the helicopter.]

Rambo: ‘Get out of here! It’s going to blow!

Colonel Trautman: ‘Take what you can, John!’

Rambo: ‘Come on!

Leader of liberated Afghans: ‘We got to get to the border. We’ll stay here. We know where to go.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Which direction, John?’

Rambo: ‘Northeast.’

[After 5 minutes of marching uphill…]

Colonel Trautman: ‘Hold it, John. I got to rest a minute. How’s the wound?’

Rambo: ‘You taught us to ignore pain, didn’t you?’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Is it working?’

Rambo: ‘Not really. Don’t take it personally.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Thanks.’

Rambo: ‘You go on ahead and see if you can find some cover.’

Russian helicopter operator just before being killed: ‘No!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John! John! That was close, John. How are you?’

Rambo: ‘Well-done.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘We don’t want to make it easy for him. Let’s split up. I’m sorry I got you into this.’

Rambo: ‘No, you’re not.’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Spetnaz!

Rambo: ‘Are you listening?’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Who are you?’

Rambo: ‘Your worst nightmare.’

[Rambo and Colonel Trautman use stealth (yet again) to kill a group of armed commandos, Colonel Trautman shooting the last one just as he’s about to kill Rambo.]

Rambo: ‘That’s good timing.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘What are friends for?’

Rambo: ‘Get back to the hole. I’ll cover you and see if there’s any left.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John! Across the valley is the border. We did it, John.’

Rambo: ‘Yeah.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Wait. What the hell is that? The son of a bitch.’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘[Loudspeaker] Do not try to retreat. You cannot escape. We won’t attack if you do not run. We don’t want to hurt you.’

Rambo: ‘I don’t believe him.’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘I order you to come forward. You will receive a fair trial. Drop your weapons and remain where you are.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘You got any ideas?’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Drop your weapons.’

Rambo: ‘Surrounding them is out.’

Colonel Trautman ‘Hell of a time for humor, John.’

Colonel Zaysen: ‘Drop the weapons. Now! You have no chance of escape. Come forward. I wish to take you back alive. This is your last warning. The choice is yours.

Colonel Trautman: ‘What do you say?’

Rambo: ‘Fuck ’em! If we’re going to go, I wish we’d taken that bastard with us.’

Colonel Tratuman: ‘What is that?’

Rambo: ‘It’s the rebels.Come on!’

Colonel Trautman: ‘John, get out of there! John!’

Afghan named Masoud: ‘You don’t want to stay? You fight good for a tourist.’

Rambo: ‘Maybe next time.’

Afghan boy soldier: ‘You want this back?’

Rambo: ‘No. You keep it.’

Afghan boy soldier: ‘Can you not stay?’

Rambo: ‘I’ve got to go.’

Afghan boy soldier: ‘Good-bye.’

Colonel Trautman: ‘Hard to believe, John.’

Rambo: ‘What’s that, sir?’

Colonel Trautman: ‘I hate to admit it, but the truth is, I think we’re getting soft.’

Rambo: ‘Maybe just a little, sir. Just a little.’

[Cue the queue of credits! Rambo 4 (2008) coming on Monday!]

d. Have a nice weekend.


Ante Galic
Ante Galic
Reply to  Grey
5 years ago

@Grey: Grey!!!

Made it to Farchana, USA.

Start 1 tonight.

a.Todd Frazier (@TOR vs Estrada);
b. Shaw (@home versus CHC Lackey)


Roger Anderson
Roger Anderson
5 years ago

First! What I hope to be able to say after 10 more days in our H2H final! And it is all thanks to a Razzball subscription. I lean on that more than a loan shark to overdue clients! Thanks for the help.