This week’s two start options are a big ol’ “Yikes.” It’s real ugly out there, folks. How bad is it? In the tiers below there are 18 pitchers who qualify as Oatmeal Cookies or better. That is equal to the number of Fortune Cookies. And I felt like I was stretching on some of those […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dallas Keuchel
Cleveland Once Again Can Say “Here Comes Jhonny”
June 26, 2024 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 221 Commentsby: Grey
Maybe I’m jhuvenile but Jhonkensy Noel has me jhonking my nose in laughter. Jhonkensy? I ain’t Jhonkensy ’round these parts since the tennis courts closed in 2018. Excuse me, sir, my Jhonda’s jhorn stopped Jhonkensy’ing, and I am a very aggressive driver so I really need my jhorn to Jhonkensy. So, the Guards called up […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?[rubbing the plush purple belly of Grimace for good luck] May my dreams that have not yet been realized — like becoming a billionaire and winning my fantasy league, not in that order — come true. “Hello, boys and five girls!” What the heck? You’re not Grimace! Are you freakin’ Barney? “That’s right, boys and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Noelvi’s Entered The Building
August 21, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 222 Commentsby: Grey
Right now, it’s Saturday in Los Angeles, and there’s reports that a hurricane could be hitting the region for the first time in 70-something years. So, I am preparing as anyone from SoCal would prepare — I’m wearing a pussy hat and an altered 2016 campaign shirt that reads I’m With Herricane, while stockpiling avocado toast. If I don’t have electricity on Sunday, just know that I wrote this on Saturday and am scheduling it now. I can guess what Sunday will bring though: Wow, I can’t believe CJ Abrams stole 17 bags on Sunday and Kerry Carpenter hit five homers. Sorry Mark Whiten, but you are no longer the King! What a great Friday Buy by (stutterer!) me! Also, on Saturday, word came down that Noelvi Marte was being promoted. Maybe it’s because I’m staring down death with a hurricane that could bring 2-3 (!) inches of rain, but I’m getting choked up at how awesome some of these Reds’ prospects are, and what that means for the future. “I love this crap!” That’s me auditioning for a new MLB commercial and getting the lines wrong. Any hoo! Noelvi Marte is being called up to play where? Yes, for this year, I’m about to exercise caution. His speed, contact and power is going to make him a fantasy star at some point, but he might not have everyday playing time. He was in the Itch’s Top 50 fantasy baseball prospects, and he was right behind E! in the Reds’ prospects top 10, prior to the season. Itch said, “Marte checks in at 6’1” 181 lbs but seems to be filling out in a hurry, just to the eye test. Next time we get a fresh weigh in, he might clear two bills. The power is plus-plus, and he controls the strike zone well for someone his age and level, posting a 13.5-to-18.3 percent walk-to-strikeout rate in 30 games for the High-A Reds. He’d posted a 10.7-to-21.3 percent rate in 85 games for Seattle before coming over in the Luis Castillo trade. Could be a sign he’s on an upward trajectory in that area, and he’s got the talent to sort of choose the type of hitter he wants to be. His big leg kick is changing shape here and there over the years as he navigates that path, and I’d like to bury Grey under the path.” Yikes, what the heck? So, I grabbed Noelvi everywhere in case the Reds figure out playing time for him — yesterday, he played 3rd — but I could see dropping him in shallower leagues if the ABs aren’t there. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Rolling In The Deep: A Littell Help, Please!
August 11, 2023 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball | 1 Commentby: Laura Holt
Wake up, my friends! I am experiencing first-hand how difficult it can be to stay focused on a disappointing fantasy baseball team or two, especially when presented with alternate activities like hitting the beach, heading out on a family vacation, or preparing for a soon-to-happen football draft. But I’ll once again say to myself and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Oh Baby! The Jays Have Something In Schneider
August 7, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 280 Commentsby: Grey
Hol’ hol’ hol’ up! Jays manager’s name is John Schneider, and they just happened to find a replacement for the three-hole in their lineup named, Davis Schneider? This seems suspect! What’s also got me sniffing the waiver wire saying, “That’s fishy,” what did they put in Schneider? He’s the first player in MLB history with two homers and nine hits in his first three games. Reranking in my head for 2024 fantasy, “Acuña, Davis Schneider, Ohtani.” Davis Schneider not number one overall? No, okay? Not yet! Maybe after this week! So, Davis Schneider did all that bombing out of Fenway, and, in Triple-A, he went 21/9/.275 with a 21.9% strikeout rate. I get it, he was a bit old for the level, but, at 24, it wasn’t like he was Joey Meneses. Not to mentionese, did we forget last year with Meneses? Sometimes guys come up, and hit for two months until pitchers figure them out next year. Schneider has no prospect pedigree, but I’d grab him in any league until he stopped hitting, or until we find out he’s John Schneider’s kid, and, as we learned in Little League, he’s only hitting third because of daddy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? Joe Ryan Comes Three Hits Away from No-lin’ The Sawx
June 23, 2023 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 215 Commentsby: Grey
Huh, weird. 4,030,000 results but Google knows which one to feature. And some of y’all say AI is bad. AI, tell me why people are against AI. “They’re not, Grey. Everyone loves AI.” Oh, okay, cool! Joe Ryan (9 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 2.98) wasn’t necessarily an unpopular call by me. He still had an ADP of 144 at the time I published my post, and drafted as late as 216th overall. Did I move the market on him? I like to think so, but even if he moved up to 80 overall, Sandy Alcantara was going at 25th overall, so was there value still to be had on Joe Ryan? Yeah, I like to think there was. Is this entire lede just me patting myself on the back? You’ll get over your scoffing and allow me one occasionally! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? Hunter Brown Camouflages His Stuff Well In His Debut
September 6, 2022 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 151 Commentsby: Grey
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Frequent commenter, PK, said the other day, “We have Hunter Greene, and now Hunter Brown in the big leagues. Just need a Hunter Orange to complete the redneck trifecta!” And I haven’t stopped thinking about that, so now you also have to think about it. Hey, PK, save the genius stuff for me! Or, Hunter Brown (6 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, 1 walk, 5 Ks), as was the case yesterday in his MLB debut. At some point, the Astros have to stop creating top flight arms, don’t they? Wait a second! You know how the A’s went from attracting fans with OBP to allowing fans to have sex in the bleachers (sorta true, google it, if you don’t believe me), from Moneyball to NoMoneyball to Hornyball. Maybe the Astros are going from the Cheaty Cheaty Bang Bang Scandal to some other scandal we don’t know about yet that turns guys like Framber into aces. Mentioned this on the podcast the other day, which is on Youtube, and will be out on our regular podcast channel today, when discussing Hunter Brown. Astros get so much more from their starters than anyone expects. Why? Is something suspicious going on? Sorry, cheat once and I always think you’re cheating. With Hunter Brown, people actually expect nasty stuff, and with good reason. He has a filthy 85 MPH curve, 96 MPH slider — that’s right, 96 MPH! That’s the fastest slider in the majors this year, outside of deGrom — and a 97 MPH fastball. If you didn’t watch him, all the pitches looked devastatingly good. Now’s the time when I turn this back into the here and now and for this year, you’re likely better off with the Streamonator than holding Brown. Also, holding Brown is how one gets sepsis. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? DBacks Call Up CC Thebatthia
August 29, 2022 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 237 Commentsby: Grey
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Just yesterday, Prospect Itch featured Corbin Carroll as the number one prospect to stash, and now he’s called up. Maybe Itch can make things happen with his words, which is why I’m worried when he talks about locking me in the trunk of a car and driving me into the desert. Also, driving into the desert is Corbin Carroll! Hashtag nailed it! He’s not looking for holes though, and he’s got no holes in his swing. He was also number one on Itch’s Top 25 for Dynasty Leagues. I don’t know if Gunnar Henderson is called up this year, my guess is no, but I wasn’t sure on Corbin Carroll either. I did give you a buy on him about six weeks ago, where I said, “Corbin Carroll has to be on the short list of 2023 ROY candidates if he stays down. Yeah, yeah, keyword: Short. Hardy har har! You tall guys think you’re so cool! ‘Hey, look at me, I can get cereal down without standing on a chair!’ Aren’t you fantastic?! Sounding like an alien who is just discovering old HBO shows, Corbin Carroll is under six feet. Much like Mookie Betts with both power, speed and average. He is the total package like Paul Orndorff.” And that’s me quoting me! I grabbed him in my shallowest league, and I would grab him in any league. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?[brid autoplay=”true” video=”1058117″ player=”13959″ title=”Bsh%20Week17″ duration=”186″ description=”undefined” uploaddate=”2022-07-22″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1058117_th_1658455518.jpg” contentUrl=”//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/1058117.mp4″ width=”480″ height=”270″]
Leagues are won and lost on the Merrill Kellys (Kellies? Kelli?). Nailing your top picks helps, but those are your top picks. Most times it’s just bad luck if they don’t work out. The later picks? Those separate from the men and five lady readers from the boys and girls. The picks that everyone rolls their eyes over and yawns. The picks that people are like, “Hey, I have to get home and leave this five-hour draft. Just give me whomever is leftover out of Merrill Kelly and Miles Mikolas.” Then your leaguemates goof around and finally are like, “Let’s give Chuck, Merrill Kelly, because Kelly and Chuck both suck.” Those two pitchers — Kelly and Mikolas — weren’t pulled from thin air. They were both drafted on average right next to each other at 483th overall. Sitting around them were Alex Reyes, Rich Hill and Michael Pineda. If you nailed the Kelly, and/or Mikolas in deep leagues? You were sitting pretty, just as Merrill Kelly (8 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.04) was yesterday, and all season. That’ll teach your leaguemates to try and sabotage you with Merrill Kelly. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? The Night of the Hunter Greene
June 7, 2022 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes, Featured | 377 Commentsby: Grey
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Anyone that rosters Hunter Greene will understand this feeling. Greene doesn’t produce happiness until he’s out of the game. Can’t even watch him out of fear. Even when he’s pitching well, there’s a sense of dread that at any moment the other Greene will appear and he’ll walk the bases loaded, then give up a grand slam to the most random of hitters.
“And there’s a deep drive to Jose Herrera…”
“Did you make up that name?”
“I did not.”
There’s likely a German word for what Greene does to us. This state of not-happiness, not-sadness. Please suggest a glossary term in the comments for this type of pitcher, who pitches well but you can’t enjoy because you’re expecting the worst.
Yesterday, Hunter Greene (7 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, zero walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 5.40) was absolutely butter on the back of a Corvette that had “TOAST” spraypainted on it. He could be again next time out. He absolutely could. If anyone tells you he absolutely will, they’re lying to you. There’s no way of knowing which Hunter Greene you’re going to get from start to start. Not yet, at least. At some point, he will be an ace, or blow out his elbow trying. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Top 100 Starting Pitchers For 2022: Week 8
May 30, 2022 | Top 100 Starting Pitchers | 44 Commentsby: everywhereblair
“Old soldiers never die, they just fade away.” — Tony LaRussa, probably.
The thing about being a historian is you carry the past with you. Like Tim O’Brien wrote in his most famous novel, Tomcat in Love…wait, is that the right book? Or was it that other Vietnam-themed book where it was all a dream? Oh, sorry, The Things They Carried. Yes, this one is for Lemon, who’s floating in the breeze out there. ENYWHEY. We carry the burdens of the past with us, etched upon our hearts, weighing heavy on our souls. As the immortal poet collective Papa Roach once taught us, “The scars remind us that the past is real.” Funny, how that works for fantasy baseball. What you did in the past is both predictive of what you do in the future, but also completely detached from what’s going on in the present. “He’s changed,” we all whisper. “Velocity is down.” What, exactly, was the normal velocity? Do we all run 4-minute miles every year of our life? Or is it good enough to run 4.5 or 5-minute miles? Does it matter if we throw 96 or 94 or 25 or 6 to 4? And on and on it goes. Let’s jump over to the news and notes and find out which pitcher has me thinking so nostalgic.
Please, blog, may I have some more?