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Top 40 Starters for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

February 5, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 294 Comments

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The 2016 fantasy baseball rankings are under that link.  Why are you lifting your computer?  Not literally under that link!  Okay, you’re thick like a CVS receipt folded in half twelve times.  In years past, the top 40 starters is a mix of guys I like and don’t like.  Like a high cholesterol cow, it’s about half and half.  This year, I really had to struggle to find guys that I didn’t want to draft in the top 40 starters.  There are four starters I wouldn’t draft in this top 40.  Four!  In the top 20 outfielders, I kept going back to how there was about eighty outfielders I would draft.  Here, it’s kinda different.  I don’t want to draft so many starters, but there’s a crapton of decent ones.  As with past rankings, my tiers and projections are included for the low, low price of $19.99!  Kidding, they’re free.  The oxygen you need to live while reading them is gonna cost you though.  Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 Starters for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

February 4, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 303 Comments

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The royal we already went over all the hitters for 2016 fantasy baseball rankings.  That’s not the “royal we” as that term usually implies.  It was me writing it alone while wearing a Burger King crown.  I refuse to draft a top starter where they are usually drafted.  Unlike hitters, you need six starters, depending on your league depth.  Simple math tells us there’s plenty of starters to go around.  Simple Math also says, “Stop putting words in my mouth!”  In most leagues, there’s a ton of pitchers on waivers that can help you — all year.  Not just in April, and then they disappear.  With the help of the Stream-o-Nator, you can get by with, say, three starters while streaming the rest.  To read more about streaming as a draft strategy.  There’s also the fact that three stats by starters are difficult to predict due to luck.  Wins, ERA and WHIP are prone to shift due to which way the ball bounces and whether or not the guys behind the pitchers can score runs.  Finally, the best starters can give you four categories.  The best hitters can give you five categories.  As always, where I see tiers starting and stopping are included and my projections.  Also, Rudy’s released his Steamer Projections with auction values.  Here’s the Steamer Hitter Projections, the Steamer Pitcher Projections and the fantasy baseball auction values for every conceivable league.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 5 Designated Hitters for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

February 3, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 212 Comments

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Here’s a post I haven’t done in some time.  I stopped doing the top 5 designated hitters a few years ago because there was only one guy, Papi Grande, that was only eligible at DH that was worth discussing.  Then last year happened, and Ron Blomberg finally had something to talk about again at the bingo hall.  “If you wanna sit by your bingo cards while I come in and hit them with the marker for you, I can do that.”  That’s Blomberg keeping his DH muscles on the ready.  All of the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings are under that rather self-explanatory link.  As with all other posts, I say when tiers start and stop and give you my projections.  If you want, here’s the 2016 position eligibility chart that doesn’t contain any of the guys in this post.  Anyway, here’s the top 5 designated hitters for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 100 Outfielders for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

February 2, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 178 Comments

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We are so close to the top 20 starters you can almost taste it, and it tastes like limoncello.  I wonder why that is.  From the top 20 outfielders through to this top 100 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball has been like the greatest mini-series ever.  Sorta like what I hope the O.J. Simpson show is.  By the way, don’t Google O.J. Simpson, major spoilers!  In most fantasy leagues, you won’t need to draft guys from this top 100 outfielders, and they’ll be waiver wire pickups.  A few of these guys will be drafted by people saying things like, “I’m really loving (fill-in name from this post) as a late sleeper,” then those same people will get to the middle of April and be saying things like, “I can drop (fill-in player’s name), right?”  As with other rankings posts, I go over where tiers start and stop and my projections.  Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 80 Outfielders for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

February 1, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 143 Comments

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We’re nearing the end of hitters in the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings, but there’s still a few buzzer-beating gems left.  Ranked this late last year was David Peralta….and he’s ranked again this late.  Also, Alex Presley was ranked this late last year.  Where did he go?  I know he left the building, but I didn’t hear where he was headed.  Anyone?  Well, I guess it doesn’t matter.  What matters is we have each other.  Now let’s sit on opposite sides of the couch and watch TV in silence.  Hey, it’s like we’re married!  As with the other rankings, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping.  Anyway, here’s the top 80 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 60 Outfielders for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 29, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 208 Comments

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Hello again.  Which was a fantastic movie!  Shelley Long needs a juicy role like Judith Light found with Transparent.  Or at least a Juicy Fruit commercial.  Sorry, for a second I sounded like a gay Larry King with rainbow suspenders.  Which would be totally fine!  Take it easy, PC police!  As we move into the top 60 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball, we still haven’t hit a huge road block of guys that are awful.  Sure, some of the top 60 have some warts.  I mean, Evan Gattis slept in a cardboard box for three years; he has to have warts.  As with all of my 2016 fantasy baseball rankings, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping.  Anyway, here’s the top 60 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 40 Outfielders for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 28, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 237 Comments

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I mentioned in the top 20 outfielders that there’s a ton outfielders that I want to draft.  The top 40 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball extends my enthusiasm.  I’d say it’s like Cialis, but then I’d have to go through a five-minute spiel of all of its side effects.  “Drafting six outfielders in the first seven rounds can lead to high blood pressure, diarrhea, sudden heart attack, fever, a fever after a heart attack which makes your loved ones think you’re still alive because you’re burning up but you’re actually dead and nausea.”  As with all of my 2016 fantasy baseball rankings, included are my projections and where I see tiers start and stop.  Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 Outfielders for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 27, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 196 Comments

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All of the infield has been done for the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings.  Where it says 2016 fantasy baseball rankings, that’s a link, and that link goes to the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings where there are more links to all of the positions that have been ranked for 2016 fantasy.  Seamless linking!  The top 20 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball is going to go into the top 40, top 60, top 80 and finally top 100.  I love a lot of outfielders this year, and will go over this more at a later time, but I could see myself leaving the top 100 overall with three outfielders while wanting, like, twenty-five of them.  Shoot (not you, Dick Cheney!), I desperately want five of the top ten outfielders and I’m not even counting the top four that are a given.  McCutchen is the only outfielder in the top ten I’m kinda whatevs on.  The last time I was this excited for an outfielder Ryan Klesko was delicately connecting his sideburns to his mustache.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 3rd Basemen for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 26, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 172 Comments

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3rd basemen are the new Dolly Parton.  They are so top heavy they haven’t seen their toes in years.  After the top ten 3rd basemen, the rest are a wing, a prayer and Winger doing a cover of Living on a Prayer, which can’t hold a candle to Bon Jovi, because A) Jersey B) No one can hold a candle to Bon Jovi because of Jersey. C) There’s no C.  D)  Jersey!  I can’t remember a position like this for any other year in recent memory, but I’ve killed my brain for years with hard drugs.  If you don’t have a 3rd baseman by the 100th overall pick, you might be kissing your 3rd baseman position goodbye.  Literally, smooching your computer monitor like you’re in that Spike Jonze movie with Scarlett Johansson robot-talking.  By the way, Johansson is 31 years old, in nine years, she’s gonna be old.  In nine years, I’m gonna be distinguished.  Damn, Hollywood, you’re messed up giving me these ageist ideas!  As always, my projections and tiers are noted.   Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 Shortstops for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 25, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 171 Comments

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The top 20 shortstops for 2016 fantasy baseball were once as bad as the top 20 2nd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball that I went over the other day.  Now the shortstops have had an influx of youth — or utes, if Joe Pesci is reading — and the future’s so bright I gotta wear shades, Arvid.  I’m happy for the shortstops, and happier for myself.  For a while, the top 20 shortstops were Tulo and those other guys.  Kinda like the top 20 catchers is Posey and those other guys.  Oh, and there was a top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball post already too (organic linking!).  Hopefully, the shortstops aren’t just showing up in a librarian’s outfit with red-rimmed glasses and appearing sexy, then turning out to be Sally Jessy Raphael.  As with the other top 20 rankings, I point out where tiers start and stop and my projections.  All the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings can be found under that thing that says 2016 fantasy baseball rankings.  Unsuccinct!  Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 2nd Basemen for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 22, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 207 Comments

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To make sure I don’t miss any player in my rankings, I go through every team’s depth charts and I go through every eligible player who is projected for at least one at-bat by Steamer.  After I looked through the players with at least one at-bat at 2nd base, I vomited in my mouth, then spit said vomit onto the ground and it spelled out, “Gnarly.”  My vomit is right.  2nd base is not a pretty position.  Shortstops got younger in the last year and some guys are coming to make it even better.  The top 20 1st basemen wasn’t straight gorge, but there was plenty of talent there from veterans.  The top 20 catchers are always ugly, but these top 20 2nd basemen are giving the catchers a run for their money.  There’s only three guys with legit 20-homer power and three guys with easy 20-steal speed.  One that will hit .300 and zero that will get 100 RBIs.  I don’t know what happened to the latest crop of 2nd basemen, but I have a theory.  Twelve years ago, when these 2nd basemen were learning the position, their role model was Bret Boone.  Boone used to frost his hair blonde, so all the kids learning 2nd base at that time, frosted their hair too.  Then their friends beat the crap out of them, and that was the end of all future 2nd basemen.  Here’s the position eligibility chart for 2016 fantasy baseball.  All the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings are under that linkie-ma-whosie.  As always, my projections and tiers are included for the low, low price of zero dollars.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 1st Basemen for 2016 Fantasy Baseball

January 21, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 227 Comments

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After the top 20 catchers for 2016 fantasy baseball, it’s all downhill.  And by downhill, I mean it will pick up speed and start moving quickly.  That really should be what “it’s all downhill” means.  I fixed you, English language, you’re welcome.  The top 10 for 2016 fantasy baseball and the top 20 for 2016 fantasy baseball were done the other day too.  I think this is what they call getting you up to date.  I don’t mean that as in, “We have to shave his unibrow into two eyebrows, and maybe have him wear something other than a sports jersey, so he’s ‘up to date’ a girl.”  This top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball goes to about 60.  Every year it seems like it gets longer and more unwieldy like the story you tell people on why you didn’t finish college.  As always, for each player there’s my projections and where I see tiers starting and ending.  There’s the position eligibility chart for 2016 fantasy baseball, and all the 2016 fantasy baseball rankings are under that linkie-ma-whosie.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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