We are so close to the top 20 starters you can almost taste it, and it tastes like limoncello. I wonder why that is. From the top 20 outfielders through to this top 100 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball has been like the greatest mini-series ever. Sorta like what I hope the O.J. Simpson show is. By the way, don’t Google O.J. Simpson, major spoilers! In most fantasy leagues, you won’t need to draft guys from this top 100 outfielders, and they’ll be waiver wire pickups. A few of these guys will be drafted by people saying things like, “I’m really loving (fill-in name from this post) as a late sleeper,” then those same people will get to the middle of April and be saying things like, “I can drop (fill-in player’s name), right?” As with other rankings posts, I go over where tiers start and stop and my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball:
81. Keon Broxton -This tier started in the top 80 outfielders for 2016 fantasy baseball. This tier ends at here. I called this tier, “There’s a modicum of upside here. Modicum doesn’t mean big, in case you didn’t know.” As for Keon, last year in the minors he hit 10 homers and stole 40 bases. Dot dot dot. CAN I HAVE HIS CHILDREN?! CAN I AT LEAST WATCH HIM MAKE CHILDREN?! CAN I ASSIST WITH HIS BABYMAKING?! What’s that? He could also hit .190? Damn, Keon, not only do you sound like the black friend who shuts down any talk of me hooking up with your sister, but you also straight poop on my upside party. Considering how late he’ll be drafted, Broxton is solid flyer. Definitely worth a flyer in deep leagues, but don’t expect too much. 2016 Projections: 52/7/58/.209/18
82. Ben Paulsen – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Garcia. I call this tier, “They have extra eligibility. Um, yay?” As for Paulsen, went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
83. Brandon Moss – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
84. Chris Colabello – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
85. Danny Valencia – Went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
86. Yasmany Tomas – As for Yasmany, went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
87. Lonnie Chisenhall – Went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
88. Joey Gallo – Went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
89. Hector Olivera – Went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
90. Adonis Garcia – Went over him in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
91. Odubel Herrera – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Dietrich. I call this tier, “DLF is gonna rock ya.” The tier name refers to Deep League Flyers. An acrostic for this tier would spell out “Asche Pompey in Orlando.” Or I might be confusing acrostic with “imaginary business trip I’m taking in my mind when I meet an ashy stripper named Pompey.” As for Odubel, he wasn’t only lucky to have a .387 BABIP, but also to play on the Phils, otherwise he’d be a 4th outfielder on another team. He was caught 8 times in 24 steal attempts, which, like Altherr beforr him, isn’t as bad as it could be because the Phils have no reason to put the brakes on anyone. They have to play like John Candy in that runaway car in Who’s Harry Crumb? 2016 Projections: 58/6/51/.257/15
92. Dalton Pompey – Fun fact! ‘The roof is on fire! We don’t need no water let the mamma mia burn! Burn, mamma mia, burn!’ was first heard in Pompeii, Italy in 79 AD and then again outside of a theater on Broadway in 2009. Pompey is solid flyer for deep leagues for speed, and would likely be playing for most teams already. The Jays, however, don’t really need him, at least yet. 2016 Projections: 32/3/25/.271/18 in 275 ABs
93. Aaron Hicks – I already gave you my Aaron Hicks sleeper post. I wrote it after getting stuck in line behind Chris Davis and Carlos Ruiz as they paid for their Adderall. On a side note, Hicks might be the player I’ve ranked the highest that doesn’t have a starting job. If Beltran doesn’t get hurt by the end of March, I will drop Hicks in my rankings, but, as of right now, I’m banking on someone on the Yanks not making it to April. You might’ve noticed something else about this tier, there’s lots of unsuredness (totally a word!). Okay, I could’ve went with indecisiveness. 2016 Projections: 42/7/46/.279/15
94. Abraham Almonte – I could’ve also called this tier, “The teams starting these guys could’ve been helped by signing a free agent outfielder.” Almonte’s the type of player that if he got 550 ABs, he’d be worth owning in all but the shallowest leagues, but if he were to get 550 ABs, I feel very sorry for the Indians. UPDATE: Almonte got caught using Boldenone when he was one embolden one <– almost a palindrome! Now Jason Motte is left as the only fruit-sounding side dish in the majors. Aw, apple sauce! 2016 Projections: 48/5/53/.241/17
94. Paulo Orlando – Or as tourists call him, “Which way to Epcot?” has little power and some speed, which is basically this whole tier. 2016 Projections: 35/5/40/.253/16
95. Cody Asche – Member when I called Asche a sleeper? We laugh now because crying burns the “tomato seed” in the corner of our eye. 2016 Projections: 44/14/48/.249/2
96. Javier Baez – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.
97. Hyun-soo Kim – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Signed with the Orioles to at least face righties and play left field. Looking at his numbers, and all Korean players in Korea, I’m left with one feeling, why are we not playing fantasy baseball in South Korea? The stats for Korean players over there are like the stats from the 90s here. If McGwire would’ve played in Korea in 1998, he would’ve hit 239 homers. No foolin’, I entered 70 homers into Google and hit translate to Korean. So, Kim, like Korean players before him, had great stats in Korea: 28 HRs, 11 SBs, .326, but Jung-ho hit 40 HRs in Korea, i.e., their stadiums are tiny and their pitching is weak. People have said Korean baseball is around that of Double-A, so Kim could hit 15 HRs, steal 10 bases and hit .270. Or he could be totally overmatched.” And that’s me quoting me! 2016 Projections: 54/14/43/.275/10 in 400 ABs.
98. Rusney Castillo – You may notice something this year vs. last year. I’m not trying to get burnt by no Cubans. Hey, I sound like an ashtray in Miami. I’m all about a lottery ticket here and there, but I was too aggressive last year with my love for Cubans. Obama starts talking about lifting trade sanctions and Grey goes crazy. I need to stop listening to our Muslim president. Speaking of presidents, I was in New York recently and went to some fancy restaurant and I had a dessert that looked just like Donald Trump. The food was good, but my dessert had a real ego! Any hoo! Rusney showed nothing last year, and until he shows something I’m fine with letting someone else take a chance on him, because I wouldn’t be shocked if he struggles in April, then falls into a platoon with the Swiss Army knife, Brock Holt. Hey, Brock Holt for president! 2016 Projections: 54/12/62/.257/11
99. Derek Dietrich – If Dietrich was guaranteed a starting job I prolly wouldn’t move him up much, but I would be more excited for him. My guess is he’ll likely see 400 ABs anyway since Prado has one foot out the door and that foot is in a box labeled “Fragile” and a moving company is picking it up by May. 2016 Projections: 41/13/48/.233/8 in 400 ABs
100. Nick Markakis – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Beltran. I call this tier, “You drafting from the comfy confines of a DeLorean?” This tier is filled with names that get features on Fox’s Saturday afternoon game about the time they saved a raccoon during a hurricane because they are players their team’s fans know, but they are not good for fantasy. As for Markakis, rarely does a player’s stats make me giggle, but Markakis’s 2015 numbers of three homers and two steals in 612 at-bats. Hahahahahahahaha! Oh my Allah, that is off the charts of awful. Lonnie Chisenhall’s had better games than Markakis’s season. 2016 Projections: 76/5/62/.281/4
101. Nori Aoki – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Signed with the Mariners. Aoki feels like one of those signings where a team’s fans get excited. “Great on base guy!” “Man, I love his wheels!” “A table setter!” Then, at some point in June, they realize he’s 34 years old and hasn’t stayed healthy in two years and isn’t staying healthy in 2016 either.” And that’s me quoting me! 2016 Projections: 62/5/33/.281/16 in 480 ABs
102. Andre Ethier – He won’t start against lefties, and I don’t mean Reds pitchers and Commies. UPDATE: Ethier is out for 10 to 14 weeks with a fractured tibia. Fun fact! Tibia is also my favorite bone that sounds like an African nation. 2016 Projections: 51/13/52/.274/3
102. Jayson Werth – If his career peaked in 2009, then right now his career looks like the alligator’s breakfast that lives in a New York sewer. 2016 Projections: 51/9/40/.242/2
103. Coco Crisp – Best days are behind Coco Crisp. Cerealiously. 2016 Projections: 48/5/28/.228/12
104. Angel Pagan – Another name for this tier could’ve been, “You’re sure they’re still playing in the league and have starting jobs?” 2016 Projections: 47/4/38/.254/15
105. Carlos Beltran – Maybe it’s because Steve Howe and Billy Martin were buried in the outfield of the new Yankee Stadium (in a pose like Rocky and Apollo at the end of Rocky III), but it does seem like Zombinos always rise from the Yankee lineup, but I’m still not buying Beltran on that hope. 2016 Projections: 46/16/57/.255/1
106. Jarrod Dyson – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Holt. I call this tier, “If they were actually playing every day, I’d be less excited for these guys.” There’s two types of hitters, one type that you’re excited about because they have a full-time job, and the other type that you’re excited about because they don’t have an everyday job so they won’t be exploited. As someone would say who is leaving Jose Altuve alone in a regular-sized house, this is the latter. UPDATE: Will start the year on the DL. Sad since this was the first time in his career he had an opportunity to wrestle away a starting job. Less sad because he’s 130 pounds soaking weight and he shouldn’t be wrestling. 2016 Projections: 37/2/25/.266/28
107. Peter Bourjos – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Phillies claimed him off of waivers. The road that Bourjos walks on is paved with a thousand broken fantasy baseballers’ hearts, which is kinda not cool. That’s not a cobblestone, you jerk, it’s my heart!” And that’s me copying and pasting me! 2016 Projections: 38/6/29/.237/9
108. Michael Taylor – All of the guys in this tier got if’s like Yeezy and Kim got mirrors. If Taylor can cut back on his strikeouts (30.9%), then he could be an absolute force like Rey Skywalker, but he had a 29.5% strikeout percentage in Double-A, so I don’t have much faith in him lowering his Ks. He does have 15-homer power and 30-steal speed, if, ya know, everything breaks right and Ben Revere breaks his wrist. 2016 Projections: 32/6/28/.237/12
109. Mark Canha – I was looking at his stats (16 HRs, 7 SBs, .254) and maybe it was in my subconscious, but I thought to myself, “Man, he feels like a Rule 5 guy,” and, J. Lo and behold, he is. Interesting? Not really, but we’re about 85,000 words in here, so roll with it, Steve Winwood. 2016 Projections: 35/15/41/.264/5
110. Tyler Naquin – In lead for Indians centerfield job. This doesn’t come as a surprise if you listened to our fantasy baseball podcast when I returned from Arizona. Naquin was a guy that impressed against righties and looked like NyQuil vs. lefties. Prospector Ralph also gave Naquin a shoutout in his rookie sleepers for 2016 fantasy baseball. It should’ve been obvious to everyone that Naquin would get the strong side of the centerfield platoon for Cleveland. They’re required to have one player who sounds like a Native American and Naquin fits the bill, and Marlon Byrd refused to change his name to Sitting Byrd. Naquin could offer some AL-Only appeal, but he doesn’t have big power or speed. 2016 Projections: 48/8/51/.272/10
111. Will Venable – Indians signed him because they’re Ready, Will and Venable, and their outfield is joke of biblical proportions if the Bible were a Ginormous Book of Dirty Jokes. Venable has some power and speed, and epitomizes this tier with he’s a ton more interesting as a platoon guy than if he were a regular player. UPDATE: Released by the Indians like a tracker for a buffalo. 2016 Projections: 31/10/42/.241/12
111. Brock Holt – He has no set place to play, but since he’s the 4th outfielder, 3rd middle infielder, 3rd corner infielder, 2nd catcher, long man out of the bullpen, and all-around Swiss Army Knife of position eligibility, I’m sure he’ll play somewhere for at least 100 games. 2016 Projections: 51/4/42/.275/10
112. Jake Marisnick – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Saunders. I call this tier, “Are they even playing?” There’s a lot I don’t like about the 15-team NFBC leagues. The number one thing I dislike is there’s no waivers. I like to pick up and drop players. With that said (Grey’s turning around this ship), there’s certain players that come to mind that don’t have a starting job right now that I would draft in a league with no waivers, hoping they came into a job at some point this year. This tier is filled with those guys. As for Marisnick, as I briefly mentioned earlier this offseason, the fastest guys in the majors are: Dyson, DeShields, Rajai, Hamilton and Marisnick. Like the doctor’s office magazine, that’s fast company. 2016 Projections: 35/5/31/.226/19
113. Preston Tucker – Jon Singleton seems one bad month away from directing episodes of Empire and being demoted for Tucker or Reed. *Googling Singleton’s IMDB page* Ouch, he’s already directing Empire episodes. I guess it’s better to be working than not, but talking about peaking early with Boyz n the Hood. 2016 Projections: 29/15/42/.262/2
114. Aaron Judge – I already gave you my Aaron Judge fantasy. It was written in the liner notes for Paid in Full. 2016 Projections: 36/16/44/.241/4 in 300 ABs
115. Nomar Mazara – I already gave you my Nomar Mazara fantasy. I wrote it like Grand Pu coming through all the residue. 2016 Projections: 24/7/29/.272/2 in 220 ABs
116. Juan Lagares – I love Yoenis, Conforto and Lagares, which brings me to my question, can Granderson please stop playing now? 2016 Projections: 35/4/30/.264/10 in 275 ABs
117. Michael Saunders – I was all about Saunders last year as a sleeper, but an untimely injury (f0r him, was timely for me since it happened before I drafted him) caused Saunders to miss the whole season less nine games. I still like the Saunders flyer late in 15-team or deeper leagues, though I wouldn’t expect more than 200 ABs from him. 2016 Projections: 27/7/19/.261/4
118. Todd Cunningham – This is the last tier. This tier goes from here until the end of the list. I call this tier, “Odds and ends and even some bums.” Cunningham is in a platoon with Craig Gentry. This platoon is what I like to call, “Finally, The Sciosciapath can’t ruin anyone’s value with a platoon because there’s no value here to ruin.” 2016 Projections: 37/3/33/.263/14
119. Seth Smith – “Today’s program is brought to you by the letter S as in Seth Smith.” *A lisper shoots up in bed, sweating.* 2016 Projections: 48/12/50/.242/
120. Jon Jay – Here’s what I said this offseason, “He posted a .563 OPS, is three years older than Gyorko and is owed more money than Gyorko. Is anyone surprised the Padres traded him for Jay? “I’m gonna see what happens when I put logic into a food processor,” says the Padres GM.” And that’s me quoting me! 2016 Projections: 47/2/41/.273/6
121. Ryan Rua – This guy is a game of 20 questions waiting to happen. Example: Rua starter? Rua capable hitter? Rua experienced? See? 2016 Projections: 27/7/35/.212/4
122. Melvin Upton Jr. – He sucks so bad people still call him B.J. 2016 Projections: 37/7/29/.217/15
123. Josh Hamilton – I partially ranked him this far down so when it’s revealed this spring that he was doing crack-cocaine or that he’s nursing a broken thigh or he decided to quit baseball for a monastery, I don’t need to make too many adjustments. 2016 Projections: 38/12/37/.248/2
