Hip-hop as an art form, and culture, is built on the ability to battle. One must show and prove their true mastery of the craft before being considered amongst the B-Boy Illuminati.  Doesn’t matter if you’re a breaker, DJ, producer, or Emcee, your battle skills are essential to staking your claim as elite. In this grand tradition many great rap battles have popped off on wax and led to some highly publicized, and in one instance, deadly beef. If you’re wondering what beef is, go ask B.I.G. Pretty sure he’s an expert on the subject…. Any pooh…….In today’s post I discuss 3 of my favorite rap battles and two that were completely lopsided. Don’t worry there sizzle chest I promise we’ll discuss the Two Start Pitchers for Week 20 as well. After all Fantasy baseball is the reason we’re here, right? Speaking of which, can you believe we’ve already had 20 weeks of baseball? Heck this is the 19th two start pitched post of 2015. How have I not run out of ideas yet? Magic mushrooms is the answer!!! I eat an 8th before I write. Makes the words feel like friends in my head. So go ahead and get to know my friends.

 

Biggie vs. Pac (Ace) – No need to get into this one everyone knows the outcome of the B.I.G vs. Pac beef, even my Mom, and Old lady Lifshitz ain’t that hip. I mean she’s broke a few hips, but who hasn’t?…..Cole all by his lonesome, he’s pretty much peeing on everyone. I’m ignoring the tough matchups and embracing the overall 2.48/2.67/3.07 ERA/FIP/xFIP splits. This is a long winded way of saying, “He’s Good Start Him” otherwise known as Hegostim.

Player Opponents Opp 1 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 2 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 1 K%vs LH/RHP Opp 2 K% vs LH/RHP
Gerrit Cole vs. Ari, vs. SF .320 (9th) .325 (4th) 20.6% (10th) 17.9% (26th)

 

Jay-z vs. Nas (Good Starts) – One of the all time great battles two top-notch diss songs, and an ultimately peaceful end. You can hear Takeover and Ether here. I was always a Nas guy but I’m not sure if there was a clear cut winner. Stillmatic and this battle revived Nas’ career. Sort of…. Good group of two starters this week with no one but Cole in the ace tier. This makes for a deep second tier with names like Wacha, Richards, Zimmermann, Liriano, Salazar, and Cole Hamels making up the meat of the order. Um, yeah about Monsieur Hamels he’s got a few question marks this week. Or what the french call “point d’interrogation”. Health chief among them. But he also hasn’t looked great thus far in a Rangers uni, and gets a tough road matchup later in the week against Detroit. Then again I’d  prefer to face Detroit at Comerica than in Arlington if I was Hamels, or if I was the dude who replaces Hamels when he’s scratched from this start. The numbers don’t bear that out though. The Tigers are tough in the D….Colin Rea is a surprise but a Hodgepadre with two starts in Petco canyon is too tough to pass on. Rea was like Olive Garden breadsticks in 75 AA Innings this year, delicious. How delicious you ask? How about 1.08 ERA with a 2.35 FIP delicious? And that’s not all, Rea also sported a 7.20 K/9, a 1.32 BB/9, and a minuscule .12 HR/9. Once he was called up to AAA things didn’t go so hot, but it’s the PCL so certain numbers can be taken with a grain of salt and dismissed as a small sample size. What exactly those things are I’m unsure of…..I love Matthew Wilser’s matchups. I’m a fan of the player as well even if his last few outings have been rough…..Carlos Rodon looked like a young Cindy Crawford covered in whip cream in Tuesday’s start against the Angels…..The Heston, Tillman, and Eovaldi trio should benefit from solid matchups this week and all be startable.

Player Opponents Opp 1 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 2 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 1 K%vs LH/RHP Opp 2 K% vs LH/RHP
Michael Wacha vs. SF, @SD .325 (4th) .295 (28th) 17.9% (26th) 21.8% (5th)
Cole Hamels vs. Sea, @Det .302 (21st) .339 (2nd) 20.8% (19th) 22.2% (9th)
Garrett Richards vs. CWS, vs. Tor .305 (T-20th) .331 (T-2nd) 20.4% (13th) 22% (T-22nd)
Danny Salazar @Bos, @NYY .310 (15th) .324 (5th) 16.8% (29th) 19.1% (21st)
Francisco Liriano vs. Ari, vs. SF .320 (7th) .306 (19th) 21.3% (T-12th) 19.6% (T-22nd)
Jordan Zimmermann @Col, vs. Mil .339 (1st) .308 (T-17th) 20.3% (14th) 20.7% (T-8th)
Carlos Rodon @LAA, @Sea .293 (24th) .302 (21st) 19.1% (25th) 20.8% (19th)
Kevin Gausman vs. NYM, vs. Min .286 (25th) .307 (T-17th) 24.2% (2nd) 19.5% (24th)
Chris Heston @Stl, @Pit .315 (12th) .312 (13th) 19% (T-22nd) 20.5% (T-11th)
Matthew Wisler @SD, @CHC .295 (28th) .303 (23rd) 21.8% (5th) 24.1% (1st)
Chris Tillman vs. Oak, vs. Min .304 (22nd) .302 (24th) 17.8% (27th) 20.7% (8th)
Nathan Eovaldi vs. Min, vs. Cle .302 (24th) .311 (14th) 20.7% (T-8th) 18.9% (25th)
Colin Rea vs. Atl, vs. STL .301 (25th) .315 (12th) 17.2% (28th) 19% (22nd)

 

Juice vs. Supernatural (Why Can’t I Sit You) – This is an actual live freestyle battle between two of the sickest off the head freestyle emcees of all time. Battle was fly, tons of punches etc, etc. I know people will post a trillion Youtube battles which is all well and good, but you have to understand this battle went viral before viral was a thing. I’ve seen both of these monsters of freestyle live and I give Juice the edge in the battle and in concert. Most people see it the other way. I love Supernat but Juice is a tad better. Check the battle out here. As always these are the starters that I just down right do not trust….Jake Odorizzi’s inclusion might raise an eyebrow. But he’s a 4.00 ERA guy outside of St. Pete, and his FIP/xFIP support it… Scott Kazmir has bad matchups, so he sits in the middle of this tier. I didn’t know where to rank Williams Perez but he’s in here because his matchups are top notch but he’s not.

Player Opponents Opp 1 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 2 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 1 K%vs LH/RHP Opp 2 K% vs LH/RHP
Jake Odorizzi @Hou, @Oak .321 (8th) .304 (22nd) 24% (2nd) 17.8% (27th)
Edinson Volquez @Cin, @Bos .309 (16th) .310 (15th) 19% (T-22nd) 16.8% (29th)
Scott Kazmir vs. TB, vs. LAD .327 (5th) .324 (6th) 21.7% (11th) 20.4% (20th)
Trevor Bauer @Bos, @NYY .310 (15th) .324 (T-5th) 16.8% (29th) 19.1% (21st)
Kyle Gibson @NYY, @Bal .324 (5th) .317 (11th) 19.1% (21st) 22.3% (3rd)
Williams Perez @SD, @CHC .295 (28th) .303 (23rd) 21.8% (5th) 24.1% (1st)

 

Masta Ace vs. High and Mighty + Boogieman (One Good/One Bad) – This battle was totally onsided but it produced one of my favorite diss tracks of all time, from one of my favorite emcees, from one of my most favorite albums. Check out Ace’s dissection of these two acts here…. Pretty simple these are the lads to start in the highlighted green games and sit in the red ones. Capache? One clarification Eduardo Rodriguez’s two moderate starts are marked in yellow. The Indians and Royals starts could go either way to me. So he’s here because I anticipated one good and one bad.

Player Opponents Opp 1 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 2 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 1 K%vs LH/RHP Opp 2 K% vs LH/RHP
Jason Hammel vs. Det, vs. Atl .324 (T-5th) .301 (25th) 19.7% (T-16th) 17.2% (28th)
Andrew Heaney vs. CWS, vs. Tor .277 (30th) .356 (1st) 21.3% (T-12th) 16.7% (29th)
Taijuan Walker @Tex, vs. CWS .322 (7th) .305 (20th) 19.3% (20th) 20.4% (13th)
Anibal Sanchez @CHC, vs. Tex .303 (23rd) .322 (7th) 24.1% (1st) 19.3% (20th)
Eduardo Rodriguez vs. Cle, vs. KC .312 (T-11th) .312 (T-11th) 18.8% (T-26th) 14.7% (30th)
Jorge De La Rosa Vs. Was, vs. NYM .310 (15th) .286 (25th) 21.3% (T-12th) 24.2% (2nd)
Aaron Brooks @Bal, vs. TB .317 (11th) .298 (T-26th) 22.3% (3rd) 22% (4th)
Chi-Chi Gonzalez vs, Sea, @Det .305 (T-20th) .324 (T-5th) 21.7% (6th) 19.7% (T-16th)
Justin Nicolino @Mil, vs. Phi .279 (29th) .308 (16th) 20.9% (T-17th) 20.9% (T-17th)

 

Murda Inc. vs. G-Unit/Aftermath – I’ll take the Gunit/Aftermath side all day, but this battle was stupid because the best thing about Murda Inc. was Asanti and that was mostly because she looked good with the mute button in full effect while watching her videos. Didn’t she have a porn too? Not touching Feldman this week, personal reasons. The Tampa start is streamable though. Danks has also been hot of late and gets two solid mtchups but he’s still John Danks I don’t trust anyone named dank. Because hippies use the word ‘dank” to describe everything from Pizza to weed to your mom’s cooking. Hippies ruin everything. Grey’s told me that’s my bumper sticker. He’s spot on.

Player Opponents Opp 1 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 2 wOBA vs LH/RHP Opp 1 K%vs LH/RHP Opp 2 K% vs LH/RHP
Ervin Santana @NYY, @Bal .324 (5th) .317 (11th) 19.1% (21st) 22.3% (3rd)
Raisel Iglesias vs. KC, vs. Ari .319 (10th) .320 (9th) 15.9% (30th) 20.6% (10th)
CC Sabathia vs. Min, vs. Cle .307 (17th) .312 (T-11th) 19.5% (19th) 18.8% (26th)
Matt Garza vs. Mia, @Was .287 (30th) .307 (19th) 19.7% (16th) 21.5% (7th)
Chase Anderson @Pit, @Cin .312 (13th) .309 (16th) 20.5% (11th) 19% (T-22nd)
Jeremy Hellickson @Pit, @Cin .312 (13th) .309 (16th) 20.5% (11th) 19% (T-22nd)
John Danks @LAA, @Sea .293 (24th) .302 (24th) 19.1% (25th) 20.8% (19th)
Scott Feldman vs. TB, vs. LAD .298 (T-26th) .331 (T-2nd) 22% (4th) 20.2% (15th)
Ryan Vogelsong @STL, @Pit .315 (12th) .312 (13th) 19% (T-22nd) 20.5% (11th)
Adam Conley @Mil, vs. Phi .279 (29th) .308 (16th) 20.9% (T-17th) 20.9% (T-17th)

 

 

As always these punk ass busters could be scratched, moved up, squashed by Godzilla, captured by Somali Pirates, or  trip on their gym bag coming in from a date with their “masseuse”. If any of them are changed we’ll discuss in the comments. For example with Steven Wright hitting the 7-day DL the Red Sox have not yet announced their starters for Monday and Tuesday.

34 Comments
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Chucky
Chucky
6 years ago

Any potential target date the Rangers look to rid themselves of Hamels and his contract? Hamels looks like a fish out of water in the unforgiving, less pitcher friendly AL. Rangers learning a lesson all too many others have learned the hard way as well. More times than not, its a potential disaster bringing in an NL hurler to pitch to AL lineups.

Rico
Rico
6 years ago

The steamonator and hittertron are hanging on the logging in and not showing results.

Crapshoot Kershaw
Crapshoot Kershaw
6 years ago

AA ron @ OAK is out of rotation.

Tha Liks
Tha Liks
Reply to  Geoff
6 years ago

@Ralph Lifshitz:
I think he’s referring to Brooks getting demoted.

Looks like Nola is getting 2 starts this week. Where does he rank?

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Tha Liks
6 years ago

@Tha Liks: Okay got it!

Looks like Nola is. I’d place him right behind Walker in the one good/one bad tier. The Toronto start tomorrow is tough and the Miami start is very favorable

Ante GALIC
Ante GALIC
6 years ago

Ralph!!

What’s up? How is life?

Who do you start this week?

a. Taijuan Walker for two (at home versus the White Sox – Danks and on the road versus Texas – Hamels)
b. Corbin (at GABP versus Lamb)
c. ‘Kuma (at Texas versus Chi Chi Gonzalez)
d. Lackey (at SD versus Cashner)
e. Smyly (at Oakland versus Bassitt)

Thanks, bro.

Cheers,
Ante

Scott
Scott
6 years ago

hey bud. where’s Joe Ross? he getting sent down after his next start?

Scott
Scott
Reply to  Scott
6 years ago

@Scott: sorry that’s Sunday disregard

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Scott
6 years ago

@Scott: disregarded

True and Correct
True and Correct
6 years ago

Kershaw goes twice perhaps. Otherwise he gets 6 days rest. Just a hunch. Would be guaranteed but for Mattingly.

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  True and Correct
6 years ago

@True and Correct: If he does we know where he ranks…

dom
dom
6 years ago

any idea if rookies Aaron Nola and Daniel Norris will still be pitching towards end of September? I like them both but my h2h playoffs start 9/14 and if they’re shut down by then I’d like to open up the roster spots to stream

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  dom
6 years ago

@dom: I’m not sure with either. I would suspect by that point you would know. My advice ride them out until there’s definitive word. If there were better options in your wire you’d already own them right?

JvanSlyke
JvanSlyke
6 years ago

Two that didn’t make the cut but I think could be honorable mentions: Ice Cube vs Common and Canibus & LL just because it produced 2nd Rd KO which also had a video

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  JvanSlyke
6 years ago

@JvanSlyke: Hahaha yeah they were both considered. I didn’t want to insult either of those with the bottom tier, but I liked the diss songs previously mentioned more.

JvanSlyke
JvanSlyke
Reply to  Ralph Lifshitz
6 years ago

@Ralph Lifshitz:

I love these rap themed two start columns!

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  JvanSlyke
6 years ago

@JvanSlyke: I love lamp!

But these are cool too

Costanza's wallet
Costanza's wallet
6 years ago

Damn! Rodon is tempting to pickup, however that WHIP is as big as Newman’s gut.

Currently have Duda and Franco on my bench recovering, either worth a drop for Carlos?

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Costanza's wallet
6 years ago

@Costanza’s wallet: If it’s redraft drop Franco if it’s Dynasty drop Duda. Rodin looked phenomenal last time out against the Angels and he sees them again to start the week. Both starts are against lineups that struggle to hit lhp

Jigboy22
Jigboy22
Reply to  Ralph Lifshitz
6 years ago

@Ralph Lifshitz:

Just noticed iwakuma and corbin are on the wire. Take either over rodon ROS?

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Jigboy22
6 years ago

@Jigboy22: Iwakuma unless you need K’s

Joeg414
Joeg414
6 years ago

Holland or Stroman ? Who do you like as a better DL stash for the ros , I hear Holland is closer , but could Stroman be more valuable ? 6×6 mixed roto

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Joeg414
6 years ago

@Joeg414: if it’s redraft Holland, If it’s keeper/dynasty go Stroman.

TobiasFunkeAnalRapist
TobiasFunkeAnalRapist
6 years ago

Hit em up will forever be the best beef song, so much hate. Would you roll with iwakuma over odorizi? Or possibly drop odorizzi for hishashi? Thanks bud.

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  TobiasFunkeAnalRapist
6 years ago

@TobiasFunkeAnalRapist: This week yes Iwakuma is coming on and Odorizzi is tough to trust away from the Trop.

Seriously and Pac made a video for it too. Think about that, he made a video for a diss song lol. I would say that Masta Ace song is pretty close. That beat is bananas.

ZyzzBrah
ZyzzBrah
6 years ago

Bottom tier should have been “Meek after hearing Back to Back”

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  ZyzzBrah
6 years ago

@ZyzzBrah: Haha that battle is weak. It’s such a clown college that Drake made a second diss before Meek came at him. With that said Back to back has a few solid lines.

PhrasingBackInTheMix
PhrasingBackInTheMix
6 years ago

Hey Ralph, great rundown. I’m in a points league with a bonus for innings pitched, so I tend to go heavy on 2-start guys. This week I have a really important matchup. I’m rolling out Richards, Kazmir, Hammel, and Rodon. For my last spot, my options are Scherzer in Coors, Syndergaard at Baltimore, Shields vs. ATL, or another 2-start guy in Wisler.

How would you lean there?

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  PhrasingBackInTheMix
6 years ago

@PhrasingBackInTheMix: I say you go Syndergaard he’s perfect for those formats, Max is a close second but his present form knocks him down a peg.

John
John
Reply to  Ralph Lifshitz
6 years ago

@Ralph Lifshitz: Isn’t Syndergaard going to be a single start this week, with a skipped start to manage innings?

Anthony
Anthony
6 years ago

Leake is going twice, where does he slot? Thanks

Geoff
Ralph Lifshitz
Reply to  Anthony
6 years ago

@Anthony: Just below Rondon and you can scratch Vogelsong.