Best part is that if you shake anyone’s hand, the cocktail in the title can be used as a disinfectant. So (with forty-six oh’s), we could have baseball. Just in Arizona and Florida. That was the news reports on Friday. By today that news will likely change. Tomorrow, we’ll hear something else. On Wednesday, well, on Wednesday, we’ll hear there’s one place Coronavirus still hasn’t affected. The MLB season can be played out in full. Allow me to set the scene: A manager comes out for a mound visit, “Just trust your stuff. Please. It’s freakin’ freezing,” as baseball plays out its 162-game season in Antartica. With the Florida/Arizona schedule the MLB has floated, the Mets will face the Astros, Nats, Cards and Marlins. El oh–oh, eff me and my Pete Alonso shares. “Hello, I’m Gary Cohen, and the Mets are coming off a 15-minute road trip to Ft. Lauderdale where they saw Scherzer, Strasburg and Patrick Corbin. Now they return home for two 7-inning doubleheaders vs. Justin Verlander and Zack Greinke, then it’s off to see the Cards and Jack Flaherty.” Luckily, I doubt it happens. I mean, maybe. Right now, everything’s on the table, which is a good sign that baseball will happen. But everyone in Florida and Arizona? I guess it’s not absolutely crackers, but I don’t see why playing there is any better than just playing in empty stadiums in their home cities. Is it more manageable because everyone’s in one place? Travel is not an issue for MLB teams with private jets. Long-term residences in Arizona or Florida is easier? I guess, maybe, but if teams have people come in to those residences to clean the rooms, are the maids tested? Are the Jersey Mike’s employees tested from where Mike Trout ordered his subs? Because you know homeboy loves the roast beef sub and calls himself Jersey Mike. My point is players will be at risk in Florida or Arizona. So, a Grapefruit/Cactus League season is interesting, but doesn’t solve all or really any issues. Though, I do wish I drafted German Marquez in one league with the thought he won’t have one game in Coors. Oh, and Nolan Arenado outside of Coors becomes like a 4th or 5th rounder. Anyway, here’s what else I saw for 2020 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Please see our player page for Zack Godley to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.
Yesterday, Michael Conforto went 2-for-3, 3 runs, 3 RBIs and his 24th and 25th homer, and, like, his 43rd homer in the last month (9 homers since the break). Men, dudes, bros, youse, five lady readers, Goofusses and Gallants, Cousin Sweatpants, my peeps from another Easter basket! Conforto gets scorching hot for these month-long stretches that makes you think he could put it together for a whole year one of these days, um, years. He’s the third Met player in history with 100+ homers before the age of 27. The other two are Darryl Strawberry and David Wright. The three of them all stayed at a Howard Johnson in the offseason. HoJo puts on a team-building seminar on his back patio and provides snacks, and Lenny Dykstra works the valet. Conforto’s in-Confort-ible! *screams for 10 minutes* Okay. I’m back. If you look at Conforto’s peripherals he really is more this post-All-Star break hitter, and less the one that struggled for the previous six weeks prior to this. Hopefully, Conforto stays in-Conforto-ible for the rest of this year and into 2020. I can see it now! (Only another 18 months of bad 2020 puns.) Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Kinda obsessed with our Top 100 Fantasy Starts tool (not a tool as much as it’s a free list). Since I’m writing this on Sunday, I’m not sure yet where Shane Bieber and his 9 IP, 0 ER, 5 hits, zero walks, 15 Ks will rank, but my guess is 1st or 2nd overall. (The tool (list?) updates after this is posted.) Pretty deep into the season to have Shane Bieber throw possibly the best start of the year. Bieber was the youngest Indians pitcher since 1987 with 12+ Ks — wow! — the last to do it was Greg Swindell — um, all right! Bieber was the 4th youngest since 1908 to have a 15-K, zero-walk game, the other three: Gooden — crazy! — Kerry Wood — nasty company! — and Vince Velasquez — well, um, he had a good game. Only two Indians starters in history with a shutout, no walks and 15 Ks are Bieber — damn! — and Luis Tiant, who at 78 years old just beat up my autocorrect for changing his name to Luis Taint. Sunday’s start shows why I wanted to draft Bieber in every league. Hopefully, he keeps it gong…gong…go I ng–Sorry, my autocorrect is scared to change anything now. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
We gonna talk about Lil’ Wayne’s favorite baseball player, “Franmil mil mil mil mil…mil mil, a mil.” Much to chagrin of the former Padres’ outfielder and Missy Elliott’s favorite player, “Matt Sczrczrczr,” or as she would say, “nac uoy eveileb eh saw reve a gniht Sczrczrczr my skizzard.” Franmil Reyes looks like a cross between Kyle Blanks and a vending machine that dispenses steaks. “Damn, I thought this was the crappy hot chocolate vending machine and now I just got charged $54 for a T-bone.” That’s someone getting a vending machine steak. Yesterday, Franmil Reyes did what he’s been known/capable of — blasting two, loud $54 vending machine T-bones into orbit, ending the night 3-for-4 with his 7th and 8th homer. He’s now on pace for 40 homers. Greek chorus, “Who isn’t?!” Okay, GC, but Franmil can get to 40 homers, unlike, say, Tommy La Stella. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
There was once a planet called *hris Davis that was all powerful, but had issues with contact so nobody knew about it. Power split the planet in two.
Khris Davis, “You, the light side of the planet, me the dark side, but I vacuumed up all your power to combine into my own and now I have all the power.”
Chris Davis, “How could you!”
Khris, “Well, you stumbled into my lair, after going 0-for-52 trying to open the door. Should you get your eyes checked? I ask as a concerned villain.”
Chris, “You stole my power, Khris with a K!”
Khris, “Tut-tut-tut, Chris with a C. It’s K-HR-ris! Muahahahaha…” Sips from a Capri Sun, then continues, “…hahahahahahaha…” Coughs a bit, ending his evil laugh, then adds a final sting, “Now you are as useful as that Qhris Davis meteroid playing for the Marlins’ Double-A team.” Yesterday, Khris Davis (2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 8th and 9th homer, hitting .266) continued his barrage on baseballs, while Chris Davis (0-for-3, 1 run, hitting .000) continued his barrage on hitting. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
If a tree falls in a forest, but no one drafts the tree does it make a sound? That’s what it felt like this weekend at Razzball. I’m sure a ton of people were angry that Daniel Murphy fractured his finger, but I heard nary a peep from the Razzball faithful. I’m guessing because of where I ranked him. According to FantasyPros, the top person ranked him 26th overall. The worst ranking of him, and, oh, it’s just silly. Some total numbskull ranked him 150th overall. Wait a second, I’m that numbskull, and the awful ranking was actually him 26th overall. I should’ve wrote an overrated schmohawk post for him, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to write this in February, “He’s old, and will get hurt. End of post. So, did everyone already take down their Groundhog’s Day decorations?” I honestly couldn’t figure out why people were drafting him. His projections were 22 HRs, .310. I mean, okay, but kinda big whoop, no? Meh, I guess it’s irrelevant now since I know none of you drafted him. Right? Riiiiiiight? The good news is Garrett Hampson and Ryan McMahon should see more at-bats, and, just as I say that, the Rockies played Mark Reynolds at 1st base on Sunday. Oh, Rockies, you dumb, dumb team, which is different than the creative team behind Dum-Dum lollipops. They’re terrific. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Every off-season I like to target players who are flying under the radar because they were busts the year before but had quality performances the season prior. Their lack of excellence could have been caused by injury, changing teams and cities, or maybe they celebrated their career year a little too hard and showed up to spring training out of shape and never recovered. Typically, we’re targeting guys in the 6th through 12th rounds that could return top 20 value. I’ve identified 12 players that meet the criteria of having proven success in 2017 but failed to live up to expectations for various reasons in 2018.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Couple of sells before the words to ring the till’s bells. If you want an ad-free experience, click here. Join a Razzball League, they’re filling up, but they need youse, so stop being afraid of success! Finally, Rudy released his War Room, you need to subscribe to our tools to get it. Not to toot Rudy’s horn — ew! — but it is what we both use in all our drafts. I’m basically crediting it with our Tout Wars wins. It is leaps and bounds better than our online War Room. It is indispensable in NFBC leagues. You can get access to the War Room via the Easter Egg hidden in the middle of the Stream-o-Nator page. You have to subscribe, though. Speaking of NFBC, sign up to take on Rudy or I or Ralph or MattTruss. League’s start drafting March 4th. Wait, there’s a more detailed intro:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Do you remember the last time you swung and missed?
Maybe it happened at your beer league softball game? Or maybe it was during last week’s company-wide meeting when you thought you’d tell that funny story about the peanut butter thing but screwed up the beginning, and nobody laughed—not even Amber from accounting who giggles at everything—so you sat down all hot faced, feeling stupid all day?
Or maybe you’re thinking of that day you finally asked out Amber from Accounting, and that time she did laugh?
Nobody likes to swing and miss, is all I’m saying. And nobody likes that awkward what-what of trying to save a story from a bad opening line. Here’s some baseball-related proof:Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the top 80 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball, we are so close to the end of the rankings, I can almost taste it! Wait, that’s not rankings I taste, I bit my lip and it’s blood. I wonder if when Dracula bites his lip it’s like when Cougs goes out with her friends and I’m left at home while Emmanuelle is on Cinemax. I’ll go over exactly how to draft starters in a few days, but there are so many ways to skin a cat we should have PETA breathing down our necks. Also, I’m hoping to do the RCL signups next Monday. Stay tuned! Or not, your call. All the 2019 fantasy baseball rankings are there. Here’s Steamer’s 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. All projections listed are mine and I mention where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 80 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?