Please see our player page for Tyler Austin to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

First off, big congrats to Albert Pujols (1-for-4 and his 6th homer), as he passed 2,000 RBIs. That is amazing. Now would some archaeologist find old man Pujols’s Holy Grail Goblet Room and let him retire in peace? Second off, David Fletcher went 2-for-5, 2 runs, hitting .310, as he finally seems to be settling in at leadoff. Can we just pause for one second and try to comprehend how stupid I am?  Okay, you don’t have to rundown all my countless idiotic calls.  I get it.  Okay, with my stupidity in mind, it took a major league manager — Bad Assdunce, in this case — almost six weeks to realize Fletcher is the best guy to hit leadoff on the Angels.  Assdunce hit Kole Calhoun (2-for-4, 3 runs, and his 9th homer, hitting .223) for 78 ABs at leadoff — a .240 hitter on a good day!  Ya know, when they hire MLB managers, they’re not hiring their best and brightest.  Oh, and I have it at 50/50 odds Fletcher doesn’t stay at leadoff, just so ya know.  By the by, Fletcher is not in this afternoon’s Buy column, but if he’s available add him for average and hopefully counting stats.  Finally, Tommy La Stella.  What in the holy fudge?  Only, I didn’t say fudge.  I said the mother of all curse words.  Yesterday, he went 2-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 8th and 9th homer.  Did he even have nine homers in 1,000 at-bats prior to this in his career?  Not to answer, because I don’t care, but WUT. At this point, Travis Shaw would need to have the best month of his career to even tie La Stella in fantasy value.  I am laughing through tears.  Sad clown tears!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m going to share a Missed Connection posting with you that I’ve been working on; let me know if there’s anything you’d change.  “Hello, Ginger.  I saw you at a Wetzel’s Pretzels in Roosevelt Field on Saturday.  I don’t know if Ginger is your name, but your hair was the color of a carrot.  Not a carrot’s top, that’s green.  I don’t know why people say that’s orange.  You looked off the scale on the crazy/hot ratio.  Your arm freckles looked like God spilled Sunny D on you.  One blonde child turned the corner, saw you and immediately started crying.  Does any of this ring a bell?  At one point, you stepped into a sliver of sunlight and starting screaming, ‘I’m burning!’  You were wearing a New York Yankees jersey with the name Frazier on the back.  If this sounds like you, please contact me.  I need an outfielder.”  How’s that?  Do you think I could get myself a 5th outfielder with that?  So, Clint Frazier finds himself in an everyday job with the Yankees.  How long he lasts is up to Giancarlo, Hicks and Gardner’s health, but I’d own Frazier everywhere to see if he can finally tap that speed/power combo.  Speaking of which, he kinda looks like Pizza Combos.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

How’s it going, deep-leaguers?  Hope everyone out there has dodged as many fantasy baseball injury bullets as possible, since we know that losing your studs in a deep league is a much different level of disaster than it is in the shallow, mixed-league world.  It’s not super helpful to read about how you might consider picking up Dansby Swanson or Eduardo Escobar to replace Trea Turner in your lineup when the “best” shortstop available in your league is Kevin Newman. As we continue to ask for leniency from the fantasy baseball gods, let’s do what we do here, and take a look at some players who may be on the radar for those of us in AL-only, NL-only, and other deep leagues.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Daniel Vogelbach (1-for-2, 2 runs and his 5th homer, and fifth in his last five games, hitting .471) is man-hot.  Daniel Vogelbach is the Jelly Donut of Swat.  Daniel Vogelbach looks like a beer keg with legs.  John Kruk and Matt Stairs had a baby, and that baby’s name is Daniel Vogelbach.  Daniel Vogelbach is one part mayonnaise, one part ketchup, and his secret sauce is Sexy, and he puts it on everything.  “Why, Fantasy Master Lothario (don’t abbreviate it), did Daniel Vogelbach spend 12 years in the minors if he’s spurting Sexy sauce on everything?”  You ask, while batting your eyelashes.  You have to subtract one of those years, young buck, because Daniel Vogelbach was once confused for a refrigerator and spent a summer in a Hyannis Port Sears showroom.  Mansplainingly, subtract, like, ten of those years because he couldn’t play defense and he was in the NL.  He’s done nothing but hit rockets like he’s groupies of Rocket from Guardians of the Galaxy.  Last year, he hit 20 HRs and .290 in Triple-A with a 15.6% strikeout rate.  He could be an actual breakout and I would grab him, even if his playing time might become cramped with the return of Kyle Seager or he might just be platooned.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

NL WestNL WestNL Central | NL East || AL West | AL Central | AL East

I don’t pay much attention to Spring Training Statistics.  You never know who the statistics are coming against.  Baseball-Reference did, however, have an amazing tool last year that attempted to quantify the quality of opposing pitchers or batters faced during spring training games on a scale from 1-10 with 10 being MLB talent and 1-3 being high A to low A level.  This tool is great, but it averages all the Plate Appearances or batters faced.  You would still need a deeper dive to see if your stud prospect smacked a donger off of Chris Sale or off of your kid’s future pony league baseball coach.  So what should we watch for in March when we’re starved for the crack of the bat?  Ignore “best shape of their life” stories and Spring Training statistical leaderboards.  Pay attention to injuries and lineup construction and position battles!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I have to keep this short, because after the jump is going to be the longest post you’ve ever seen in your life.  How do I know all the posts you’ve seen to compare this one to?  Because I’m sitting behind you.  *waves*  Hey!  Also, the top 20 1st basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball are the saddest crop of 60-something 1st basemen I’ve ever seen.  I’m shook, Baby Boo!  So, I’ve given you the top 10 for 2019 fantasy baseballtop 20 for 2019 fantasy baseball and top 20 catchers for 2019 fantasy baseball.  Here’s Steamer’s 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers.  All projections included here are mine, and where I see tiers starting and stopping are included.  Let’s do this!  Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2019 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I considered making this post:  Tyler Austin and Jake Cave, 2019 Fantasy Baseball SleeperS!  Though, I likely wouldn’t have capped the S.  I did that for you, Dear Reader.  I didn’t make this a duo sleeper post, because I think I have OCD and I like to keep shizz tidy and stylized as all previous sleepers.  That doesn’t mean if Jake Cave breaks out I won’t continue to go back to this post, because I’m equally excited about both Tyler Austin and Jake Cave.  Or as Google suggests, Jake Man Cave.  Yes, he is a man, but I don’t think we’re talking about the same thing.  So, why not just do a separate post for Jake Cave?  Because no one cares about him.  I tweeted at Jake Cave and he seems to barely care:

He responds with a GIF?  Really?  That doesn’t scream confidence to me.  What, you can’t reply fully to a random Twitter person who you don’t know who is obviously only interested in you as a fantasy baseball entity who wants to keep calling you Jack Cave?  Anyone that apathetic worries me.  Though, you can’t spell apathetic without Pac.  So…hmm.  Even with his inability to hit lefties (.194 vs. lefties), he had the 22nd highest barrels per at-bat, the same as Javier Baez, and Cave’s average home run distance was 419 feet, which was 5th in the majors for that many plate appearances.  If this were about Jake Cave, and not Tyler Austin, I’d tell you Cave was the 2nd lowest for soft contact (8.6%), making better contact overall than Joey Votto, Voit, Matt Carpenter, Freeman, Betts, Just Dong and, well, every other player in the majors except Eugenio Suarez.  Unlike Tyler Austin, Cave looks like he has the starting job, and could be the one guy who no one drafts who ends up on 100% of fantasy teams by season’s end, cranking so many homers that everyone is going to be like, “What?”  Pause. Eyes bulge.  “WHAT?”  If this were about Jake Cave and not Tyler Austin, I’d tell you my Jake Cave 2019 projections were 61/22/68/.259/4 in 476 ABs with a chance for more.  However, this is not about Jake Cave.  Anyway, what can we expect from Tyler Austin for 2019 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

First base was pretty disappointing last year. Only three first basemen finished with more than 90 runs, only four hit over 35 home runs and only 5 had over 90 RBI. Owners with quick triggers probably finished high in their fantasy leagues if they grabbed Jesus Aguilar. So what am I looking for in “This Year’s Jesus Aguilar?” I’m talking about a first baseman who had a solid minor league resume before an unexpected breakout in the big leagues yet still wasn’t on a lot of fantasy teams to start the season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You know how they say think about baseball to make sex last longer?  Okay, so I was thinking, to make the baseball season last longer do we think about baseball?  Maybe we think about sex.  This is a riddle for the Sphinx!  “Hello, Sphinx, I have a question.  Yes, I have $20.  Why do you ask?  Because you’re a sex worker wearing gold paint and not an ancient Egyptian statue?  Ah, that’s my bad.”  You ever read that book, The Mouse That Roared?  I think it was assigned for me to read back in school, and I watched the movie instead.  Solid flick!  So, if a mouse roared, he’d be a hoarse mouse while still roaring.  That’s how I’m screaming David Dahl‘s name right now.  Like a roaring hoarse mouse.  An RHM, as they say.  Who’s they?  Hoarse mouses, of course.  The bitter enemy of the church mouse.  Are you following?  Cause I’m leading you down some place of interest.  I am a hoarse mouse roaring David Dahl because I love him.  Yesterday, he went 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 14th homer, and 4th straight game with a homer.  He might be my favorite player for 2019.  You take your Adalbertos, but David Dahl has 35/15/.290 ability in Coors and, with how he’s playing these final weeks, he might actually have the lead for the three hole in the Rockies’ lineup going into 2019.  This is the best spot in the major leagues to hit.  As a roaring hoarse mouse on a horse might say, giddy up!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I have an unpopular opinion, that I know will never fly.  Pants with magnet buttons.  Okay, I have another one:  knock people over the head and when they wake, tell them they’re on Mars and film it.  Like Survivor but more panicked.  My final unpopular opinion, allow teams to forfeit.  I know in today’s charged political climate it’s not cool to say anything bad about herbathrowdites, but hitters pitching is stupid.  It’s okay for a quick laugh, but a team has obviously forfeited if they’re pitching Jace Peterson.  Just let them throw a white flag, and call the game.  Of course, this would be wildly unpopular with fans who paid a lot of money to see nine innings, but are people sticking around in a 19-3 game.  I don’t know, maybe they are.  So, yesterday, Xander Bogaerts (2-for-4, 2 runs, 4 RBIs) collected his 100th RBI and 22nd homer.  Just Dong Martinez (3-for-6, 3 runs, 3 RBIs) hit his 42nd, a number I thought was retired.  Mookie Betts joined the 30/30 club (more on him after the jump).  Blake Swihart went 3-for-8, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (3) and legs (6), inching closer to Buster Posey’s year-long homer total.  Rafael Devers (5-for-8, 3 runs, 6 RBIs) stole the show, hitting his 20th and 21st homer.  I’ve collected 1,000 praying mantises and joined them in a prayer circle that feels insectually correct, hoping Devers doesn’t push up his 2019 fantasy value in this final week.  I talked a bit about this on the last podcast, but Devers is only 21 years old, and could easily be a middle of the order bat for the Red Sox next year.  That’s very good, assuming every team they’re facing doesn’t forfeit.  Or assuming every team does.  I don’t know, let’s figure this out together!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?