Shohei Ohtani (2-for-4, 2 runs) hit his 32nd homer, passing Hideki Matsui as the top Japanese-born home run hitter in a season, and it’s not even the All-Star Break! Such a cheat code, and I’m such a giant dummy to not have him on any team. Boy, I Mr. Bungled this one so bad it’s hard for me to see through my tears of anguish. The absolute ball dropping I did by not grabbing him. Or Jared Walsh (2-for-4, 3 RBIs) who hit his 21st and 22nd homer! I wrote a gee-dee sleeper post for him! Yet, all my fantasy teams are like a milk carton with that missing Walsh kid. This is brutally difficult for me. I should’ve known better for Ohtani, and I did know better for Walsh! Someone shoot me into the sky, where I can do something for humanity by flipping off Bezos’s orbiting rocket ship, and away from the misery of watching Ohtani and Walsh carry fantasy teams to the proverbial promised land. I was promised that land! I have my deed right here…*searches pockets for deed, pull back to reveal I’m wearing pants with millions of pockets* This is my nightmare! We’re in it! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?