So, I gave you a Jose Miranda 2022 fantasy post kinda already, when I told you how much I liked him towards the tail-end of last year, while thinking he was about to be promoted. Ended up I got goosed, and Miranda got service time jag-offed and wasn’t brought up. I didn’t tell you everything, so we’re back. What I did say, “Jose Miranda as played by Cynthia Nixon in her most challenging role yet: Minnesota Twins prospect. The sun sets through the West Village window, as clickety-clack from Carrie’s word processor is heard. She reads the words out loud as they make their way onto her 64-bit screen, “Miranda wasn’t going to come, so to speak, up for the Twins until they were good and ready. With Josh Donaldson out of the picture–Wait, is Josh out of the picture?–Gosh, Miranda really needs to find a new position, so to speak, to play in. Maybe Miranda can get in, so to speak, some time at 2nd base, like Samantha after five minutes knowing a guy.” And that’s me quoting Carrie Bradshaw! Jose Miranda has no speed, but his bat is more than ready, and it is explosive. Possesses the usual Twins’ tendencies — Twindencies? — he doesn’t strike out at all and doesn’t walk a ton. Are the Twins developing prospects or just cloning a Luis Arraez who was dipped in amber? Developing, because Miranda actually has power, unlike most Twins prospects. As Prospect Itch said recently, “Minnesota has demonstrated an appreciation for precisely this sort of profile, and Miranda is a better all-around hitter than some of the other guys from the past few years (Astudillo, Sano, Rooker). And much better than Grey, who sucks.” Okay, that’s hurtful. “I know just the slot for him,” says Samantha as Miranda groans.” And that’s me quoting me quoting Carrie Bradshaw and Prospect Itch! A person quoting a fake Carrie Bradshaw quote on a fantasy baseball website is something you prolly read so much, huh? So, what can we expect from Jose Miranda for 2022 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Read the official "Who is Grey Albright?"
Read some of Grey's 4331 posts
Love that Oneil Cruz ended the year with the Pirates. Maybe this is a banana in the ol’ tailpipe. Or rather a banana in the booty hole. Booty as in treasure stolen by Pirates and put in a “hole” in a lower deck–Ya know what? No need to explain, everyone says booty hole with only one thing in mind. A pirate ship’s lower deck for treasure, where the peg boys hang out. So, maybe this banana in the booty hole will come back to haunt me like a ghost ship that has lots of booties with bananas, but my expectations have been raised by him being promoted in the final weekend of last season, whether that’s good or not, we shall see. Break camp, not wind when the booty hole and bananas are on the line, as I always say. Any hoo! Here’s a fun one to watch:
ONEIL CRUZ JUST HIT HIS FIRST MAJOR LEAGUE HOME RUN!!! pic.twitter.com/PIMMswXDYl
— Pittsburgh Pirates (@Pirates) October 3, 2021
Oneil Cruz had no business hitting that ball out. What’s that, a flip of the wrist in one of baseball’s worst parks? He’s a shortstop with 80-grade power? Oh…*climbs up a stack of phone books until one reaches the moon*…kay. So, what can we expect from Oneil Cruz for 2021 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Prospect Itch’s fantasy baseball top 100 prospects has Julio Rodriguez as numero uno. The big mahoof. The head honcho. The ying and yang. The sun, moon and stars. Here’s what Itch said, “A thunderous power bat with a knack for going the other way. Concerns exist about his ability to handle elite chase pitches on the outer half, and while that’s true of just about every young hitter, J-Rod’s first move in the box is a slight drift toward third base, and his front leg moves that direction, as well. He’s adept at slashing or driving the ball to the opposite field, so I suspect this could be just an aesthetic thing because sometimes the greats just look different and force us to retrain our eyes a little. Might wind up a double plus in hit, and power with just enough athleticism to chip in on the base paths. If only I could ‘double-hit’ Grey’s head.” C’mon, man! Jul-Rod, which sounds like a vaping product, went 13/21 across High-A and Double-A Arkansas in 74 games with a slash line of .347/.441/.560, which is kinda hilarious. His top exit velocity was 117.4 MPH. That’s Vlad Jr.-type top exit velocity, i.e., a top 10 MLB exit velocity. If you’re wondering where he was and why he only saw 74 games, he was leading his Dominican Republic Olympic baseball team to a bronze. During his Olympic experience, he hit .417 and got to find out if inside the metal is white or dark chocolate. *intern whispers in ear* There’s no chocolate? That’s a bummer to hear. I hope Jul-Rod didn’t crack a tooth. So, what can we expect from Julio Rodriguez for 2022 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
A fantasy baseball It Was A Good Day.
Just wakin’ up in tha mornin’, gotta thank Junior Vlad,
I don’t know but today seems kinda odd,
No barkin’ from any pitchers’ elbows makin’ me look for replacements,
And momma cooked a breakfast and left it by my door — her basement’s,
I got my grub on, but didn’t pig out,
My insulin I didn’t need to dig out,
Rollin’ around in a field of daffodils,
Not even worried about lactose that I can’t metabolise,
Rememberin’ what it’s like to feel alive,
Lookin’ for a prospect who’s got speed, power and line drives,
Forgettin’ that I have allergies, and a doctor-restricted diet of 1500 calories,
Not sneezing, thinkin’ about the best rookies for 2022 fantasy baseball galleries.
Findin’ an empty cola can to use as an ashtray,
Talkin’ about the best 2022 fantasy baseball prospect, gotta say It Was A Good Day.
Last year’s top rookie in my rookie outlook series was Randy Arozarena. Year before that, it was Luis Robert. The year before was Vlad Jr.; the year before–You get the picture! Every year there’s a #1 rookie going into the upcoming season. Ergo/Therego: Welcome to the 2022 fantasy baseball rookie series and Bobby Witt Jr.! This feels a little more precarious than past years because usually I like to have some inclination from the team that they’re going to start the year with the player. Could the Royals suppress Bobby Witt Jr.’s playing time for another six years, then convert him to a pitcher for another five years just to avoid paying him? Yes, that’s what cheap teams do. So, what can we expect from Bobby Witt Jr. for 2022 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
We’ve gone over the final 2021 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters and the top 20 starters. This is different than Final Fantasy rankings where you rank Final Fantasy 1 thru Final Fantasy 15. That’s hardcore nerd shizz! This is simply fantasy baseball — we’re softcore nerds like Emmanuelle is to porn. So, there’s no more of these godforsaken recap posts left. You’re welcome. I, my over-the-internet friend, will be talking next about 2022 rookies. Let’s boogie to the next year, boogiers! Oh, and one thing I think people might enjoy if you’ve been reading Razzball for a while, Tehol’s on national TV without pants:
One of our Razzball writers is on this season of The Bachelorette — which guy? The one not wearing pants pic.twitter.com/I8COMDuE2z
— Razzball (@Razzball) October 19, 2021
Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
All the final 2021 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters are done. For those that skipped today’s title, this starts the top 20 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball. This is NOT for next year (caps for those who can’t read titles; supposedly it’s easier to read caps, I have my doubts). This is a recap. Will these affect next year’s rankings? Sure. Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t know. Not entirely. Entirely. Like when you had a knee replacement, this is a recap! To recapitulate the recap, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. We’re (me’re) using it to fairly gauge our (my) preseason rankings. Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the top 40 outfielders for 2021 fantasy baseball, we’ve finished all the hitter recaps. We meaning me, but I’ll include you. No, that’s not a cue to try to hold my hand. Why are you now patting my butt? Don’t muss my hair! The pitching recap will begin next. You can hardly wait. No, you! To recap, the end of the season rankings are based on our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. I felt the easiest way to keep it objective would be to go this route. This way when I say a player finished 30th and I ranked them 23rd in the preseason, it carries more weight than Willians Astudillo. Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The good news is the top 20 outfielders for 2021 fantasy baseball are better than the top 20 3rd basemen. The unfortunate news is, if you had a five-outfielder league, you need at least 60 of these guys, and by the time we get through 40 in our next post, we will have already run dry of solid outfielders. Outfield isn’t shallow, but I wouldn’t say it’s deep either. This end-of-the-year ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 outfielders for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
And we’ve reached our final top 20 recap for the infield, and, if you exclude the catchers, 3rd base is by far the shallowest position. 3rd base ain’t great, y’all! This is the first position where there’s guys at the tail end that I actively wouldn’t have wanted on my fantasy teams, and guys like Yoan Moncada, Bobby Dalbec, Alex Bregman, KeBryan Hayes and Alec Bohm all stunk, and didn’t even come within a sniff of the top 20 3rd basemen. To recap my recap before the recap, this final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. This is not for next year. Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Now that we’ve recapped the top 20 catchers, top 20 1st basemen and top 20 2nd basemen, we’re starting to see clarity on depth of positions, and this is an M. Night unexpected twist. Shortstops are not as deep as 2nd basemen. The 2nd basemen benefited from some guys (Semien, Trea) getting 2nd base eligibility, but it still leaves the shortstops, a position considered extremely deep, shallower. *sings Bradley Cooper/Lady Gaga “Shallow” for 15 minutes on repeat* That’s a bit of a shock. Not how beautiful my voice is. That’s not shocking at all. So, here’s the final ranking from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
We already went over the top 20 catchers and the top 20 1st basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball. Today, we dip our big toe into the top 20 2nd basemen pool. Also, for the 2nd time in two positions, I ranked and projected every player in the top 20. Glorious be me, but also that means there were very few guys to come out of nowhere this year. Through three recapped positions, it’s only been Eric Haase. More like HAHAHAHAHaase. To recap this crap (rhyme points!), this final ranking for last year is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Today’s journey through the recaps take us to the 1st basemen. They’re better than the top 20 catchers for 2021 fantasy baseball (not clickbait at all), but by how much? How do I explain that? I have an idea! By recapping them! To recap my recap before the recap, this final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. This is not for next year. Hayzeus Cristo, just enjoy a recap before we get into next year. Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2021 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?