Third base was far from an epic fail like something JayWrong would have a GIF for.  There were a good ten 3rd basemen and another handful that could’ve covered your corner infidel slot.  The problem is after the top twelve, the 3rd basemen fall off the map like a 12th century explorer.  Here’s you, “Hey, I’m gonna go to India heading west.”  You’re whistling, everything is good, then you have Trevor Plouffe in your corner infidel slot and you’re dead from scurvy.  This year there were fewer 3rd basemen coming out of nowhere to give you value, so if you didn’t have a top guy, you were probably stuck piecing together waiver scraps.  This final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments.  The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  I look forward to the random comment about how I’ve left off so-and-so.  This is not for next year.  Lisa Simpson groan.  Oh, they’re not reading this intro.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2014 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

1. Miguel Cabrera – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen.

2. Anthony Rendon – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

3. Todd Frazier – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen.

4. Josh Donaldson – One word of note about the top three guys here and a ton of guys after here, if you had a good third baseman this year, chances were likely he had eligibility elsewhere.  All the multi-position eligibility in this post helps us see what positions were deeper this past year on the infield.  1st base was the deepest, then 3rd base, 2nd base, shortstops and catchers.  No real surprises there, except 3rd base and 2nd base were nearly interchangeable with their depth and shortstop is noticeably shallower and catchers, of course, were egregious, Jackie Chiles.  Continued in next blurb.  Preseason Rank #7, 2014 Projections:  74/19/80/.290/4, Final Numbers:  93/29/98/.255/8

5. Kyle Seager – 3rd base and 2nd base being interchangeable in depth is a huge difference from the preseason.  This was made abundantly clear from all the landmines at 3rd base.  Prepare to not take a breath for a second and then a long sigh as I list the disappointments:  David WrightRyan Zimmerman, Pedro Alvarez, Gyorko, Asche, Middlebrooks, Mostsuckass, Machado and Bogaerts.  Asche and Mostsuckass make it clear in hindsight that I was a moron for trusting them.  The other guys weren’t obvious slam dunks, but they weren’t obvious slam-my-head-against-the-walls either.  Preseason Rank #9, 2014 Projections:  83/20/77/.263/10, Final Numbers:  71/25/96/.268/7

6. Adrian Beltre – The continued theme from each recap post is the Rangers bombed and took all my preseason recommendations with them.  That’s the last time I count on a team run by a guy that once admitted to doing coke and was having an affair.  Now, would I vote for that guy for president?  Oh, hells yeah!  Preseason Rank #3, 2014 Projections:  85/31/104/.303/1, Final Numbers: 79/19/77/.324/1

7. Evan Longoria – I’m trying not to make these recaps about next year and instead about what they did this past year.  With that said (reversal time!), we (you and me — hey!) both know Longoria’s going to bounce back next year on someone else’s team after we carried the weight of his suckitude this year.  You know that, right?  Where do I mail this pile of feces that I’ve collected since April?  Anyone have a shipping address?  Preseason Rank #2, 2014 Projections:  96/31/103/.273/3, Final Numbers: 83/22/91/.253/5

8. Carlos Santana – Went over him in the top 20 catchers.

9. Josh Harrison – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

10. Daniel Murphy – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

11. Pablo Sandoval – My projections and Mr. Butterworth’s stats were about as close as you could get, but I ranked him 7 spots lower in January.  Know why?  Cause I thought there would be seven other 3rd basemen that wouldn’t disappoint me.  Oy gevalt offense is a flippin’ mess!  I’m looking in your direction Ryan Zimerman and David Wright.  Don’t sneak away, Pedro Alvarez, I’m not done with you yet!  Preseason Rank #18, 2014 Projections:  62/17/76/.285/1, Final Numbers:  68/16/73/.279

12. Matt Carpenter – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

13. Trevor Plouffe – Plouffe goes my brain when Plouffe is a top 13 3rd baseman!  And he didn’t even have that good of a year.  He had 15 homers and two steals!  15 homers and two steals and there wasn’t 13 guys better?  I need to sit down.  Wait, I am sitting.  Okay, I need to lie down.  Preseason Rank #31, 2014 Projections:  51/15/63/.242/2, Final Numbers: 69/15/80/.258/2

14. Nolan Arenado – It’s too bad Arenado doesn’t steal 7 to 10 bases because then it will be easy for me to rank him in the top 25 overall next year.  Top 25 overall, you say incredulously.  Don’t scoff, you scoffer.  I love this guy.  He has 5-homer per month power.  That’s easy in Coors, and that means 30-homer power.  He could hit .320 with just a tad bit of luck, but he’s easily a .300 hitter.  In Coors, everyone has counting stats.  Drew Stubbs last year had a shizzton of runs and RBIs and he was a platoon guy that only hit well in Coors.  Coors makes everything better, hitter-wise.  Todd Frazier if he only had two steals or Arenado?  Arenado is the easy call there.  Unfortch, Arenado runs like he’s got two flat feet.  I’m gonna love Arenado next year, but due to the lack of speed, he will be a tad limited.  Preseason Rank #11, 2014 Projections:  74/21/82/.282/3, Final Numbers: 58/18/61/.287/2

15. Chris Davis – He didn’t even make it into the top 20 1st basemen, and here he is in the top 15 for 3rd basemen.  Um, poo.  There was good news with Chris Davis last year.  No, not that he was suspended and you could finally drop him without regrets.  He hit 26 homers, the 19th best in the majors, and had about as terrible a year as he could have.  Okay, smart guy, he could’ve hit .196 and 25 homers and had a worse year, but you catch my drift.  If he hit for no power and no average, then shizz would’ve really been pear-shaped.  Hitting .286 as he did in 2013 was really the outlier, not 53 homers.  He can hit for power, I don’t know if he’ll ever hit for average again.  Preseason Unranked for 3rd baseman, Ranked #4 for 1st baseman, 2014 Projections:  83/39/104/.259/3, Final Numbers: 65/26/72/.196/2

16. Aramis Ramirez – He had nearly 500 at-bats last year (494) and only hit 15 homers.  Imagine if he has 375 ABs next year like he’s been known to do.  *wavy lines*  Hey, I have Aramis for 375 ABs and Plouffe for 200 ABs and my team isn’t that bad!  *wavy lines*  Okay, that wasn’t what I was expecting you to imagine.  Preseason Rank #20, 2014 Projections:  64/16/69/.278/1, Final Numbers:  47/15/66/.285/3

17. Lonnie Chisenhall – It’s an exaggeration to say one good game propelled Lonnie Gonnie into the top 20 this year.  It’s not an exaggeration to say two good months did.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  62/13/59/.280/3

18. Martin Prado – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

19. Casey McGehee – Coming back from Japan paid off nicely for him…OR DID IT?!  If he would’ve stayed in Japan, instead of four homers, he would’ve hit 59 homers, drove in 167 ribbies, or as they call them there tamagoyakis, and would’ve been awarded an MVP belt by a life-size Hello Kitty.  So, did it pay off nicely?  I think not.  Preseason Rank #33, 2014 Projections:  44/12/59/.231/2, Final Numbers: 56/4/76/.287/4

20. Luis Valbuena – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen.

  1. The Theory says:
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    Ugh, 3rd base was a wasteland this year. 6 of the top-10 were multi-position eligible, and so they were often played at those other positions, making it feel even shallower than a straight positional ranking implies. It says something when Matt Carpenter’s unexciting numbers played the same at 2nd (12th overall for the position) and 3rd (12th overall for the position).

    Feels worse when guys like Beltre and Longoria underperformed their draft cost. Hell, even Cabrera didn’t live up to expectations, though at least you still got the best 3rd baseman in the game.

    I wish I could humble-brag and say I predicted this (I kind of did), but my target in several leagues was Pedro Alvarez. So.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @The Theory: Yup and yup… It wasn’t pretty this past year… Plouffe, who was unowned for most of the year in 12 team leagues, is in the top 13…

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @Grey: turns out I was stupider than I thought ripping on friends(s,ha) of mine for streaming him fairly often, or owning.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Hear ya

  2. Ante GALIC says:
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    Grey!!!

    So, if I understood your introduction, this is NOT the 2015 projections for 3B but do you deny that it COULD be? Just kidding, of course it’s not. Used this blurb as an icebreaker like salesmen use before giving their monthly regional sales report because they’re super nervous about reporting the 16th month of a drop in sales.

    1. I think I like Davis at 3B next year if I could get him for cheap like rounds 10 to 15. Definitely not going before round 5 on my teams. Davis was hurt by many things, the suspension notwithstanding. In ’13, he hit behind Manny who hit like 50 2Bs before the ASB. IF Manny gets back to ’13 level production and Davis hits behind THAT, he could approach ’13-level production. The homers he hit in ’14 were flying off his bat just like in ’13. Plus people will be scared away by the suspension for adderall. Ok, my man crush has had enough.

    2. Had Cabrera in the two leagues of three that I won.

    3. Had Wright in the one league of three that I lost. He wasn’t the only reason for losing but I will NEVER EVER EVER IN A BILLION YEARS EVER DRAFT DAVID WRIGHT. Actually if he went to ANOTHER hitter-friendly park, I might think about it. His swing was not made for Citi Field and ever since they moved into the new stadium, the homers have died. Add to this his chronic shoulder problems and that should be enough of a deterrent… In short, hate him for 2015 and beyond as long as he’s in Citi Field.

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @Ante GALIC: Good news the mets are moving in the fences this offseason. (no joke they really are) Now you can draft wright again

      • Ante GALIC says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: Ty, JeF. I did win with Wright in ’10 so it is possible to win with him. His skill set was tantalizing when he was on and he had one ‘primo’ week out of 26 rotten weeks so…They brought in the fences last season and it didn’t help but I suppose some genius figured out where all his flyballs were landing relative to the fences and they came up with a solution. He’s not even running like he should to make up for his lack of power. Like running was dependent on his shoulder or something. Here’s wishing you a gr8 off-season F!!

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @Ante GALIC: Same to you…Wright could be in Coors and i wouldn’t draft him………i think

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: Didn’t the Mets do that two years ago too? They should just move in the fences 50 feet and be done with it…

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @Grey: Yup they moved them in and lowered the left field wall 2 years ago…Moving time again, maybe they are trying to turn tejada into a power hitting SS

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Wet Tail for 50 HRs!

            • JeF With 1 F says:
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              @Grey: hes going to be real moist

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Wet Tail usually means a wet bottom, but we could have some fronts…

                • JeF With 1 F says:
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                  @Grey: If you keep saying “Wet Tail” J-Foh will not like you anymore…be careful

                  • Grey

                    Grey says:
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                    He’ll get over it… If he could get over the hate he’d find the absurdity and enjoy it…

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: I find the absurdity in someone shoving it down our throat until you finally accept it. I never stopped hating, you know this Grey. You allowed me to throw hate at Nick and the other RCL quitters, you keep this dog tied to his pen for when he’s needed….That’s actually well played on your part to use me as needed. Speaking of hate, how did Tehol get to do an article called Hater’s Ball, my credentials in hating far exceed his pretty boy wishy washy hate. He’s too pretty to be mad at the world….He is damn pretty. I on the other hand am at best a “before” model for plastic surgery or weight loss pills. I want a re-count and want to do the Hater’s Ball next year. (take no offense to this Tehol, you’re far too pretty to be this hateful)

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Tehol called it… I asked you what you wanted to write and got crickets… I like the craziness that is Tehol, and think he’s doing a good job… Don’t see taking him off of it…

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: you gave me closer then Smokey came back and was given Creeper. I’ll work on something for next year. I get the crazy appeal of Tehol, he wins in that department,and it is a good place to keep him, but i still think I’m filled with more hate. him and me need to have a hate off…

                      I’ll email you some of my off season stuff I want to do

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Tehol’s got crazy in spades, flush with insanity, poker analogy of lunacy… The funny thing (maybe not funny) is he gets more hate than he gives…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Bee tee dubya, you don’t have to do offseason look back posts… You can start to look ahead…

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: Take Kid A out of that and it doesn’t seem like much. As hilarious as it was, it was the majority of it. In the past, you had a lot of stat nerds in here on the daily and they expect everything at that high level. I think thats where most of the hate comes from. I still like my Tehol vs. Stats battle

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I think that has something to do with it… Doesn’t help that he writes with such braggadocio from the Elder Gods…That’s what I enjoy about it though…

                    • jef with 1 f says:
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                      @Grey: kind of like you shoving down our throat how much hate you have for everyone except for about 5 guys just because they have been around longer…As Dar as your concerned the more people commenting and contributing should be a good thing for you and not something that annoys you.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Snap!

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: I’m all good with the elder Gods, he has a good out. In all honesty it’s a nice counter balance to the nerd herd. I just want to write with more hate towards players. Stupid pussies with their obliques. Speaking of obliques, is that a new part of the human body that was discovered in the last ten year?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Was always there:

                      See?

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: why you got bring up brain freeze bro? I miss those terms like I miss when catchers could block the plate. Stupid Big Head Bochy.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      If you turn that image around you see a $12 Salad

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Grey: stop it, when my daughter asks what happened to the donkeycorn? i can only hold her when she cries. Smokey is an animal

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      What? You can’t explain to her FMK? That’s prolly for the best…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @JeF With 1 F: I love my contributing commenters, at an arms distance kind of way. Some of the hate is meant for posturing and persona, don’t confuse it boy

                    • JeF With 1 F says:
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                      @J-FOH: So its phony?…Maybe you should be J-PHO

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @JeF With 1 F: when it comes to my readers, I help them with their teams and don’t hate on them, when it comes to real world baseball players, managers, and color commentators and the stupid shit they say or pull including their pussy ass attitude toward playing it’s real, when it comes to you, it’s not hate, just a lack of respect, when you actually “contribute” like you said below, then that respect thing might change.

                    • Militant Vegans says:
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                      @J-FOH: J-PHO??? Do they make Japanese Pho???

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Haha

                    • JeF With 1 F says:
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                      @J-FOH: By the way…i dont want your respect…just your love

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @JeF With 1 F: Gay jokes? i can’t even respond to that epic type of comeback.you are a master of hilarity

                    • JeF With 1 F says:
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                      @J-FOH: Hated it

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Nice…. But are they keeping recliner seats in left field?!

                • Swfcdan says:
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                  @Grey: They better trash them now, as guys sleeping in those recliners might finally have a chance of being hit by a homer!

                  • Grey

                    Grey says:
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                    Ha

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ante GALIC: 1. I don’t think he’ll be going that late… Maybe 7th round… 2. There ya go! 3. I hear ya

  3. Swfcdan says:
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    No Rendon? If you did include him here also, where would he rank?

    • MattTruss

      MattTruss223 says:
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      @Swfcdan: He’s #2

    • Chuckles Tiddlesworth says:
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      See #2..

  4. MattTruss

    MattTruss223 says:
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    I clearly didn’t pay enough attention to the player rater and where these guys were ranked, as I’ve been fairly surprised by some of these rankings. Wouldn’t have guessed Arenado was so low. I owned him all year in almost every league and was pretty happy to just let him ride in my 3B spot. I know missing a month hurt his ranking, but Lonnie with only 2 good months is only a couple spots lower. Speaking of which, it was actually OK timing for Arenado’s injury, I was able to add Chis in most leagues to replace him, so I got a hot month+ out of Lonnie while Arenado was on the DL. My combined stats for those two in ECFBL was 82/25/94/2/.283, which is basically Kyle Seager. I’ll take that. The injury effect in the RCLs is easier to overcome in the shallow RCLs. Think I recall OTS speaking to that when arguing for CarGo+replacement was still first round value, or something like that. Anyway, gonna be all over Arenado again next year, he’s maybe one of the most fun players in MLB to watch too. The plays he makes at 3B are just ridiculous, makes them look so easy and they most certainly are not.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @MattTruss223: You hit the nail on the head with injuries… Arenado was top ten when playing and when he was DL’d you didn’t have him in your lineup…

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: would it make sense to you to put AB’s in these recaps or is that what January Grey is for?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Prolly more of a question for March Grey…

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: I’ve noticed some readers dont read into down stats and with some players AB’s lost to injury make them appear to be less than what they are….cust kayin’

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, could be

    • Wake Up says:
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      @MattTruss223: I think you are thinking of my CarGo + Bonifacio argument from last year.

      Clearly not the year to trade for Fielder and Longo….wah wah wah

  5. Phil B.

    PBMax says:
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    E2? He was 3B eligible in Yahoo! at least(he didn’t play 3B this year though)

    • MattTruss

      MattTruss223 says:
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      @PBMax: Grey’s rankings are for 12 team ESPN settings, just like the RCLs, so he’ll compare his rankings to the 12 team ESPN player rater. For the Yahoo version, you can look here:

      https://razzball.com/playerrater-mlb12team-yahoo/

      Where you’ll see E5 is coincidentally enough, 5th for 3B, right behind Donaldson.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @PBMax: What Matt said

  6. Lville Jim says:
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    Hope your Arenado love continues for years to come. Picked him up in a trade early last season from a manager who thought he was only Joe Mauer away from contending in our dynasty all keeper no cash values league.

  7. ashtray says:
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    I was able to roll with Encarnacion at 3B this year (when he wasn’t injured) in my league on Yahoo. Do you use ESPN position eligibility?

  8. Swfcdan says:
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    Forgot to ask when the 1B EOY rankings came out. No Fatt Adams even in the top 20, showed what a crazy bad year it was for him, his counting stats were horrific despite the good lineup (which hadn’t hit at all until October).

    Do you see a big (moob) bounceback for him next year, along with some other of the Cards bats. Looks like he’ll still have a job, is he worth keeping for any of these options (10 team roto keeper):

    1 year – $3
    2 years – $6
    3 years – $8

    Tough choice to predict the future, but I gave up quite a lot to get him after his rookie year, so don’t wanna dump him easily.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Swfcdan: He’s worth keeping for 1 year

      • Swfcdan says:
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        @Grey: Yikes, January Grey can’t be high on this guy.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          $3 is small enough investment for it

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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      @Swfcdan: weren’t they a bottom 3 offense in NL even at end of season (i mean overall)

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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        @Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: if you watch hockey it’s the same thing as the LA kings offense during the season vs the postseason.

  9. These Ho's ain't Loyal says:
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    I just watched a video on how to make a tamagoyaki. Debating if i should make one now…

      • matt says:
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        @Militant Vegans: hey now! Why is a vegan eating eggs?!

        • Militant Vegans says:
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          @matt: ummm… errr… cuzzzzz… you can make it with “Ener-G Egg Replacer”

      • Ante GALIC says:
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        @Swfcdan: No, that’s tamogachi! My kids taught me that one!

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • Swfcdan says:
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          @Ante GALIC: Are they still popular with the kids? Was a big time craze when I was at school a long time ago. Bet they are mega advanced now compared to the ones we had then.

  10. Coolwhip

    Todd25 says:
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    Grey, seems 3rd base was almost as much of a minefield as SS was, compared to how we expected players to perform and throw in some injuries and craptitude here and there like a monkey pitching BP. Luckily for me this year I had Frazier and Arenado, so that kept me above water (and the crap) and led to the win.

    Daniel Effing Murphy came in at #10 3B this season… hahaha… breathe… hahaha… remember when he barely made the list for 2B.
    and then this lovely note I remembered from Berry, “Adrian Beltre, 3B, Rangers (going in the second, take in the first)” neon glowing sign on FIRST. we are laughing.

    http://gifyu.com/images/giphyb40a2.gif

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Todd25: Yeah, totally… Nice GIF, ha! Matthew Berry is such a moron…

  11. J-FOH says:
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    I wanted to share from my youth what shaped my entire opinion of New Yorkers, except the Woody Allen types, there are those and there are these.

    • royce! says:
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      @J-FOH: Teresa Joey – hah! If she marries a Joey, they could name their kid Teresa Joey Joey.

      • J-FOH says:
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        @royce!: that is true and probably true somewhere in NY

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Oh my God, Christopher from The Sopranos… Wow, I hadn’t thought about this in a while… This is like a Sky level linking…

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: thats a hell of a compliment, he has trained me well in the ways of the internet Jedi…. and there is a part two

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          He prolly would’ve embedded the video in a comment so we could see it here… You’re almost there!

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: I need better backend access to do that..ah hum *coughs*

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Don’t think you do, think it’s just knowing the right code… (Don’t look at me, I don’t even know)

              • J-FOH says:
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                @Grey: he told me how to do it but when I’m logged in to wordpress I dont have access to the features. I also can’t answer comments in the backend, have to go to website. Maybe because he used to edit football he has better access

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Below the comment box where you’re commenting it has the codes… Those are what he uses, I believe (honestly, have no idea)

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: ive asked. Ill text him again to find out

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
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                      @J-FOH: select ’embed’ on youtube. No need or backend access to anything/one for that

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @J-FOH: this should say @SKY, then what about pictures?

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
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                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @sky I can’t cut and paste that…dah *gets out pen and paper, blows dust off of it*

    • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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      @J-FOH: so that’s how imperioli got the sopranos role.

  12. royce! says:
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    Drafted Zimmerman in the RCL and had to piece together a season with Chisenhall and Carpenter at 3B. Needless to say, I did not place in 1st. So I just went back to read what you wrote for Zimmerman preseason and have no qualms with it beyond Oh Sheila being stuck in my head, though that in turn led me to discovering that it’s not a Prince song. So I’d say I’ve accomplished a lot today…back to bed!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha, sorry about that… Ready for the World! Where’s your bro, SteveNZ?

      • royce! says:
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        @Grey: I don’t know…I guess they planned a long vacation, and right now he’s SteveFR

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          SteveArrondissement7

          • royce! says:
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            @Grey: So fancy! That’s our SteveNZ!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yet maintains connections to us common folk (at least I hope so)

    • J-FOH says:
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      @royce!: back to bed? The inmates need you

      • royce! says:
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        @J-FOH: They ain’t going anywhere…I mean, they’ve got me as a lawyer, and I’m 1-4 in FFB!

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @royce!: but being 1-4 in your job is an all star

          • royce! says:
            (link)

            @J-FOH: Oh yeah, good point! Math is not my strong suit.

  13. J-FOH says:
    (link)

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      • de nachos says:
        (link)

        @J-FOH: a polar bear eating a marshmallow in a snow storm. Classic JPEG!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          HA!

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @de nachos: you got me, my next pic will be a dove in a cloud riding a paper airplane

        • Big Magoo

          Big Magoo says:
          (link)

          @de nachos: Hahahaha

  14. Sky

    Sky says:
    (link)

    How do you make a cute puppy creepy? Add creepy music, of course. AND DO NOTHING ELSE

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, that reminds me of the really poor taste (but kinda hilarious) videos of 9/11 with Benny Hill music…

      • Sky

        Sky says:
        (link)

        Benny Hill theme over anything is funny, as sad as that may be.

        Music sets the tone so often, people often neglect it. Except when the dialogue is so weak it’s hard to ignore. I’m looking at you, Titanic and Avatar.

        • J-FOH says:
          (link)

          @Sky: I only watched the boat sink because when it came out on video you had two tapes. No DVD then

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            Were you kind enough to rewind when you took the rental back?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Speaking of movies with music, saw Whiplash last night… Was amazing… Definitely check it out when it gets to you…

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            ooooh, I saw the previews. It looked good, glad to hear it lives up to it. And Miles Teller in ’21 & Over’ was brill!

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                Haha, I need brylcreem!

                • Big Magoo

                  Big Magoo says:
                  (link)

                  @Sky: A little dab’ll do ya! (until your hair starts looking like Gene Hackman’s)

                  • Sky

                    Sky says:
                    (link)

                    AKA Lex Luthor? YIKES

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Oh really? Might have to check it out now, because he was phenomenal…

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                It’s a college party comedy BUT it was well written. Might still be streamable on Netflix. It’s where I got this image from when I talked about Jay during my Adam Lind piece:

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Nice, will see if it’s still on Netflix

  15. JeF With 1 F says:
    (link)

      • JeF With 1 F says:
        (link)

        @JeF With 1 F: that embed shit didnt work for me

        • Sky

          Sky says:
          (link)

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Sky: What the JeF is that? A JeFen Hebra? Hated it!

            • jef with 1 f says:
              (link)

              @Wake Up: HaHa

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

  16. Wake Up says:
    (link)

  17. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    dammit technology!

    (that was a supposed to be a completely shaven Conan O’Brien candid!)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Manscaped?

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Grey: …and powdered

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Gold Medal?

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Grey: White Gold!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Ah the pure shizz

  18. Sky

    Sky says:
    (link)

    Just testing if there really is a difference between backend postin of images or not here

    • Wake Up says:
      (link)

      @Sky:

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

  19. Not Sky (Ok, it's really Sky) says:
    (link)

    Final Test. This time we see if it’s a user rights issue on why some pics aren’t posting:

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      You used your real pic on this avatar, huh?

      • Sky

        Sky says:
        (link)

        In a word? DUUUUUHHHHH.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
      (link)

      And there’s the proof. Something about the user rights of writers allows for some and not other writers or even commenters. Have no idea what that would be but let’s make one thing clear. The avi above? Best. Avi. Ever.

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        Hmm, not sure what that’s all about… Oh well…

  20. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    @Embed Get over yourself, bra!

    • Sky

      Sky says:
      (link)

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Sky: ahhahahahah…I was talking directly to the embed…not the master of embed…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Awesome!

          • J-FOH says:
            (link)

            @Grey: but what does the Michael Bay porn look like?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Lots of explosions

              • J-FOH says:
                (link)

                @Grey: don’t all porns have that?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  More in this one, and lots of fluffers

                  • Sky

                    Sky says:
                    (link)

                    • J-FOH says:
                      (link)

                      @Sky: bravo mi amigo de pelo

                  • J-FOH says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: I started thinking more about this and he has bad actors, bad dialogue, lots of explosions, and leaves the audience feeling good about what they watched only during the movie when after they realized they just over payed for a lot of fluff. I think we know where he got his start.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Ha! Nice…

        • Sky

          Sky says:
          (link)

          I don’t normally OMG but when I do, it’s because someone posts a video titled ‘A Porno By Wes Anderson’ and it’s factually accurate. All this to say:

          OMG

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha

  21. Big Magoo

    Big Magoo says:
    (link)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d have to go with Hooch’s Orange Malt Liquor Drink

      • Big Magoo

        Big Magoo says:
        (link)

        @Grey: With a name like that, you’d think there’d be a better logo…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yeah, like a dwarf hoochie mama…

          • Big Magoo

            Big Magoo says:
            (link)

            @Grey: I’d be all over that! Anything that I get would be something that I’ve enjoyed over the years though. Hooch’s reminds me of Mad Dog 20/20 from the looks of it…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Yeah, that’s pretty much what it was, but more kid-friendly and less nasty tasting… Basically a nightmare for parents…

              • Big Magoo

                Big Magoo says:
                (link)

                @Grey: Hoochies and Hooch’s both, it seems.

                Here’s the sample sentence for MD 20/20 according to Urban Dictonary: I’d like to be able to squirt a turkey baster of MD 20/20 directly onto my brain each day before work.

                Sounds like brain food to me! Now, what was I saying?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Haha… Urban Dictionary’s editors are only rivaled by the editor of Carson Cistulli’s Wikipedia page…

                  • Big Magoo

                    Big Magoo says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: Haha, that is pretty funny. I remember reading some of his stuff on Fangraphs awhile back. Keepin’ the editor busy.

                    Top 20 outfielders review coming tomorrow or next week? I’ll be back into FBB mode and out of BS mode (mostly) for that one.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Tomorrow… BS mode is fine, it’s October…

                    • J-FOH says:
                      (link)

                      @Big Magoo: it is cool. I’d hold out or buy one from a bar. I gave my buddy an old pabst sign from the 60’s I had and a bunch of old mirrors I got when my buddy remodeled his old bar.

  22. jef with 1 f says:
    (link)

    Grey you need to hook me up with the writers user rights before we get this expert league going…I need to be able post some pics of the things that go on in this underground league.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, up until about three hours ago, I didn’t even know I had different rights…Let alone Sky…

      • Sky

        Sky says:
        (link)

        In my world, you’d have no rights. Consider yourself lucky.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Do you pay my mortgage if I live in your world?

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            Technically, yes. But you’re my cabana boy and you sleep in said cabana gratis!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              That’s my flowered chaise lounge chair, thank you very much!

        • jef with 1 f says:
          (link)

          @Sky: So sky…how do you feel about Wet Tail…we have a lover of it and a very disrespectful hater…What’s your thoughts as a man of the woods

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            I’ve only seen images of a gerbil disease that I never want to see again. I don’t know if I actually know/get the reference right now.

            • jef with 1 f says:
              (link)

              @Sky: it’s a long story but basically Lucas Duda is Wet Tail….Wet Tail is also a term to describe diarrhea in my house…hence Duda/Wet Tail

              • Sky

                Sky says:
                (link)

                I’m guessing you had to be there? Or is this a ‘bad’ really means ‘good’ kinda thing? Or does your household appreciate a fine case of the hershey squirts? Duda was good this year but is diahrea? I am so confused right now!

      • jef with 1 f says:
        (link)

        @Grey: it may be the off-season but we learned a lot today…
        1. You have rights
        2. Sky has hacked your system
        3. J-FOH does not have as much hate as it appears, just no respect

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Maybe all we learned was Sky hacked the system and everything has come from that…

          • jef with 1 f says:
            (link)

            @Grey: that prolly makes the most sense

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Ha, yup!

          • Sky

            Sky says:
            (link)

            Skynet joke would be apt here…

  23. Hal Incandenza says:
    (link)

    Thanks for the content to ease us into a post-season state of mind! I’m thinking enough people will be sufficiently higher on Arenado next year that he won’t be easy to get in competitve leagues. Maybe that won’t be in some leagues, but in a yearly redraft roto league I know one guy was trying to get him from me and will probably snag him if I don’t commit high enough. Will be interested to see where February Grey has him.

    Thanks again!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I bet January Grey will have something to say before February Grey… February Grey is a slouch! (No problem)

  24. Mike

    Mike says:
    (link)

    Hey guys, check out this cool picture

    • Mike

      Mike says:
      (link)

      Here’s another one…

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Mike: Ha!

      • Grey

        Grey says:
        (link)

        Haha

    • jef with 1 f says:
      (link)

      @Mike: Ha Ha…I like the second one…oh wait that’s just Wake Up

  25. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    Speaking of getting to third base…you may appreciate this…

    So, this gal pissed me off a couple of days ago. Earlier today, she called and said that she wanted to meet up to apologize. So, I suggested the shizziest little dive bar that I know in the sketchiest part of this town, that’s about 45 minutes away from her, for happy hour. This ensues…

    Her: Hey I’m here, weare r u? (sic)

    Me: (15 min later) omw

    Her: (20 min after that) Want me to order you a drink?

    Me: Sure. Long Island Iced tea. Thanks!

    Her:(another 15 min later) Your ice is melting. Wear r u? (no e on the end of wear this time)

    Me: I’m here. In the bathroom. Sorry.

    Her: (another 20 min later) r u ok?

    You know I never even went there. And, that’s pretty much how I left it. Joy to the World!

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @Wake Up: she’s got a case of the salt and pepper stinkies

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha! You should’ve told her to get you a daiquiri though, c’mon…

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Grey: if he would of asked for a daquiri then she would of come here and complained to you thinking you are really him….on the other hand it would counted as a fifth girl reader

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          We’ll take all the girls we can get!

          • J-FOH says:
            (link)

            @Grey: I may or may have not told a female when I was being a wingman that my name is Grey Albright…you know for site hits

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Ha, appreciate it!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha… They’re all him…

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
        (link)

        @Grey: he needs to bring back jolly saint prick.

  26. Matt says:
    (link)

    Reasonable expectation for Crush Davis in 15: .230/25/90?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      If he hits .230, he’s gonna hit more than 25 homers…

      • Matt says:
        (link)

        @Grey: His BABIP was pretty low/unlucky but he did get killed by the shift, do you think he rediscovers that LF power stroke and hits above .230?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          .230 seems about right for his over/under

  27. papasmurf says:
    (link)

    I was hoping for 28 HR at the beginning of the yr out of Longo, then after APR I would settle for 22 and .250 and he actually got there early but didn’t hit anything out in the final couple of weeks so I got exactly 22.

    I really wasn’t gonna keep him until he had a mini surge at the end and now it looks like I do have to keep him. A lot of his value increase near the end came from RBI though (i recall a bunch of groundouts driving in runs). And I dunno if I can count on that repeating if his power outage is permanent.

    I guess to have gotten a down year from Longo and still win my league should feel great about next year, but I don’t. I just don’t have any confidence he will be anything better than .270 28 HR 90 RBI.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      28 HRs from him now feels aggressive, but not completely absurd…

Comments are closed.