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Please see our player page for Brenton Doyle to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

“Worse thing that God ever spit up.”
“Hitler?”
“What? No, I’m looking at what Jake McCarthy did so far this year in the majors.”
“So, you think Hitler was better than Jake McCarthy–”
“Shut up about Hitler!”

Jake McCarthy recalled in that above exchange and to the majors. I’d say he was hideous to start the year, but I’m afraid of a defamation suit being filed by the word “hideous.” “Ya know, I’ve had about enough of your disparaging.” That’s the word hideous. There was a reason why Jake McCarthy was on a bunch of my teams to start the year. It is illuminated by his four homers and four steals in only 22 games since he was sent down. He has great speed and power. I know you drank away most of what he did from your memory. This post: A splash of knowledge refreshing your Mind Eraser. Jake McCarthy can absolutely be worth rostering in every league. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH)

Standing in front of the Reds’ GM office, whistling as I push a mop past the open door. Cleaning up a pile of spaghetti and chili that someone dropped earlier that day in their rush to get to the cafeteria to get a new plate of spaghetti and chili. I say to myself in a low whisper, “Hmm, I’m just a janitor for the Reds. Living my best life. Been a lifelong Cincy guy. What a shame someone dropped this beautiful spaghetti and chili. Just a real shame. I’m not pretending to be a janitor so I can overhear when the Reds’ GM calls up a new prospect. That’s silly to even consider. It wasn’t me, early this morning, breaking into the building to spill spaghetti and chili in the most opportune spot so I could carry out this ruse. Not me. That’s just very silly.” I carefully sidestep the pile of spaghetti-chili, and lean my ear towards the GM. Drats! He’s calling up…Skyline?! For more spaghetti and chili?! Oh, these people are incorrigible! So, I don’t know who the next Reds’ prospect will be called up. My guess is it’s Christian Encanracion-Strand, but we don’t need to worry about that, we have one already called up, Matt McLain, who sounds like a pro athlete, only not for baseball. For like bowling. Does he wanna bowl with Mookie Betts? Speaking of Betts, no, I won’t compare him to Betts, but McLain does have power and speed. Cincy plays so well for power too, that you almost have to be a negative to not take advantage of Great American Smallpark. While McLain’s power can produce 15-ish homers, the speed is even better. He could go 12/20 in only four months of the season, and has solid contact. I’d grab him in all leagues. Oh, wait a second, someone just called the GM about a pickup, let’s listen in…Oh, forget it, it was David Bell asking if someone could pick up the spaghetti and chili in the hallway, and put it on a plate for him. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Count’s 2-1, and Jack Flaherty is leaning in…and, would you look at that, that is interesting…Willson Contreras is calling for an 88 MPH fastball down the middle.” I kid! Jack Flaherty (7 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 5.24) looked great! After the first inning. Was a bit wonky at the start. At one point, he went from a 75 MPH curve to a 95 MPH elevated fastball to a 84.5 MPH slider to a 79.5 MPH knuckle curve on four straight batters, all resulting in strikeouts. All he needed for motivation was to prove his own catcher sucked. “But how,” Jack Flaherty wondered in his most sincere of voices, “Could a pitcher look good while making his catcher look bad?” Flaherty still desperately needs command from pitch 1 to 100 while going 95 on the fastball, but last night was a step in the right direction. Speaking of directions, the Cards all sucked together, and now they’re all fantastic together. The Cards’ way, I suppose. Nolan Arenado (2-for-3, 4 RBIs and his 7th homer, and 4th homer in four games) is going off, and I had a reason to Sell Low written down that was so eloquent. It’s right over by this open window–NOOOO!!! Torenado! Also, in this game, Andrew Knizner (1-for-1, 2 runs, 4 RBIs) hit his 3rd homer, and 2nd in as many games. This homer was vs. a position player, but there ain’t no asterisks in my fantasy league. Next, Tommy Edman (4-for-5, 4 runs, 2 RBIs) hit his 6th homer, as he heard the footsteps of people going to waivers to drop him. Finally, Nolan Gorman (3-for-5, 2 runs, 5 RBIs) hit his 10th homer, as the house of Cards begins to rise again. Hopefully, Oli Marmol isn’t inspired to give one of his motivational speeches again like, “Tyler O’Neill and Willson Contreras, you guys suck and can’t field your positions or run and I hate all of you.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

First off, we have to wish our five female readers a very Happy Mother’s Day. I started a petition for next year’s Mother’s Day, where MLB puts a nipple on each base, and, when runner steps on it, it lactates. I think after I petitioned MLB last year to have hairy bean bags on the end of bats for Father’s Day, they’ve muted me somehow, so if you could boost this, I’d appreciate it. One guy who’s obviously a momma’s boy is Mitch Keller (7 IP, 0 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 13 Ks, ERA at 2.38, 70 strikes out of 93 pitches). This comes after a 4-hit shoutout, which comes after four years of near-5 ERA pitching, which comes after being a highly touted prospect, which comes after emerging from his mother’s womb, because yesterday was all about moms! His peripherals are all saying everything Mitch Keller is doing is really happening vs. some kinda mirage that will evaporate when his luck runs out. The most incredible part of Mitch Keller’s star mitzvah is that he’s doing this prior to his trade to the Yankees for Albert Abreu and cash considerations. Oh, you know it’s coming, Keller high water. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“My wrist, well, guys and gals, chicks and *icks, you’re not gonna believe this, but, it’s 100%. My wrist is healed. It’s the best it’s ever felt. My wrist feels like Elton John during his imperial phase. My wrist is playing Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting, and people aren’t hearing crap, but they’re hearing a masterpiece. My wrist is Nic Cage in Leaving Las Vegas, doing all kinds of crazy judo chops in the supermarket aisle, and people are believing it, and are riveted. My wrist is Ty Cobb without the racism. My wrist is perfect!” This was a quote from Alex Kirilloff this year, and last year, and the year before. He was called up by the Twins, and played 1st yesterday (1-for-2). Kirilloff has been struggling with wrist issues since 2021. Almost exactly two years ago, he tore ligaments in his wrist. Those are the worst kind of after-dinner mints. Why do we care? If he’s healthy, he’s a 40-homer hitter with a .280 average. Sadly, we don’t know if we’re ever getting the purported strong-wristed Elton John or a limp-wristed Kirilloff. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH)

“Are the Cubs stupid? We come back after the break to answer that very important question and many more.” The anchor takes off his earpiece and says, “Yes, they are stupid. They’ve kept down Matt Mervis and Christopher Morel for so long now for what reason? Is there a reason? Well…?” Then, he realizes he’s not an anchor, but instead he’s a fantasy baseball owner of Matt Mervis and Christopher Morel, and he’s not wearing pants and he’s sitting in his mother’s basement and he’s doing a ‘newscast’ to his cat, Pajamas Higgins, who was the Cubs’ first baseman last year for 38 games, though he’s better known as P.J. As I said last year, “I did a google for Matt Mervis and his ETA and I found he’s going to be promoted to the Cubs in 2022. Very cool, let’s see how he did. Let me do another google for us. Hmm, I’m not seeing any stats for Matt Mervis with the Cubs. The Cubs must’ve had some great 1st basemen for the last year.” And that’s me quoting me! Same story, different year! Matt Mervis is a 25-homer guy in the majors tomorrow with no change in approach. He’s not young, so, ya know, he should already be in the majors, if the Cubs didn’t want to waste him for no reason. At 25 years old, it would be easy to write him off, but he was a college guy who lost 2020. I asked Itch if Mervis was going to be Tork 2.0, and he said he hoped not, then asked for my GPS coordinates to send a drone. Itch also added that Mervis has more reps against good arms and he keeps getting better. Sounds like he should be Never Nervous Matt Mervis. He reminds me of every super late cornerman that is rostered in every league. 25/.260 guys have value, and he should’ve been up already. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I hope Dodgers 2B Michael Busch really drinks it all in during his big league debut because he might be right back in the minor leagues the following week. Doesn’t matter much either way to his long-term outlook. I suspect he could push Miguel Vargas if the bat plays early. I’m not confident Vargas ever got right in Spring, and then he got hit by a fastball in the thumb on April 4th. He’s slugging .295 with zero home runs or stolen bases but still posting a .364 on base percentage due to the plus plate skills. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I say something on this week’s podcast like, “Tanner Bibee is coming up any day now,” it’s quotes like that why the Pulitzer for Podcasts said, “Can we make a special award just for you?” Sure, their special award was called, “The Pulitzer for Saying Something While Saying Nothing.” So, the Guards are supposedly calling up Tanner Bibee to start today, and they don’t play around with their pitchers, which is something I should remember for next year when I’m between drafting a guy like Gavin Stone and a Guardians’ pitching prospect. So, Bibee has a 95 MPH fastball with four pitches. The fastball and 84 MPH slider are the swing-and-miss’ers. His slider was 56% swing-and-miss, which is nuts. His change is kinda bleh and the curve doesn’t do much, but setup. He has excellent command, and could be the rookie pitcher prospect call-up of the year. Another Pulitzer award, presumably. Here’s what Itch’s said, “Bibee’s currently my favorite of Cleveland’s pitching prospects for dynasty purposes in terms of cost vs. value. He’s coming off 73.2 innings in Double-A with a 0.88 WHIP. He allowed just four home runs there and wound up with a 1.83 ERA. He’s good enough to the naked eye that I think he’ll make waves this spring. His 122.2 innings pitched last year sets him up perfectly to step in whenever the Guardians need help. People still seem to be underrating his physical gifts. At 6’2” 205 lb, Bibee can sit comfortably in the mid-90’s deep into games and has that Cleveland specialty skill of commanding his off-speed pitches. In case you can’t tell from the blurb, I want him everywhere I can get him. And I want to punch Grey everywhere I can.” That’s not cool! Bibee is worth grabbing in every league. Yes, even in your league. Will he stay up? Hard to say, but worth the flyer. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You thought every team having a Luis Garcia was confusing? You rued the day you ever learned there was a Trevor Megill and a Tylor Megill? You thought they were joking when they said there was another Max Muncy? You’re in a Holds league and get the shakes every time you see T. Rogers? You still have a headache from the time you drafted Ryan Braun, the reliever? Well, do I have a surprise for you! For a limited time only, we have two Logan Allens! It could be worse, they were both on the Guardians! Now, there’s one on the Rockies and one on the Guardians. That makes things easier because you’d never want a pitcher on the Rockies, so you only have to look at the team name and remember, “No Rockies pitchers ever.” So, why do we care? Well, outside of AL-Only leagues, we may not. Logan Allen (6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks) has a starting job right now, but Triston McKenzie and Aaron Civale could return at some point (in theory), and Hunter Gaddis is stretched out and might get another look. Since the “why do we care” became “why should we not care,” here’s an answer to the caring part: He consistently has a 11+ K/9 in the minors. Itch’s said, “A great athlete with plus balance and command who repeats his delivery with ease, Allen fits the Cleveland mold for pitchers who exceed their on-paper projections. He’s not an ideal candidate to add velocity at 6’0” 190 lbs, but Cleveland tends to find a way, not that Allen has needed more than his low-90’s fastball, plus changeup and average curveball to this point, and I’d like to stick Grey with a sharp point.” C’mon, man! Itch’s “Cleveland tends to find a way” is why I’m interested in deeper mixed leagues. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?