Brash. Bold. Brazen. Beguiling. None of these words actually apply to this game we call fantasy baseball. Except for beguiling, because that’s what Grey’s mustache does to your brain when he’s giving you a good chin wag about Fernando Tatis. Keep waggin’, Grey! Today, we’re getting ready for the fantasy baseballer (<---Grey's mom's word) season by looking at my bold predictions for pitcher performance in 2021. So, grab a Bold Canada Dry, set the radio to "Lo-Fi Hip Hop," and turn your Hue lights to purplish-yellow. We're about to get bold in here.
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Picture this.
You’re in a dark room. You don’t know how you got here. Your eyes have been sealed shut with a foul crust of dead skin and tears for so long that you labor to let in the smallest amount of light. And when the dim light of the computer monitor in front of you finally hits your tender retina, it’s like staring directly into the sun.
You compose yourself, what little of “yourself” is left. It’s coming back to you now. It’s hour 56 of your dynasty draft, isn’t it? Round 5609. The names flashing across the board no longer resemble any human language you’ve ever seen before.
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ANNOUNCEMENT!!
Ten (10) Razzball Patreon members will randomly be selected to compete against Grey, Rudy and a slew all the biggest names in the fantasy baseball industry in this years RazzSlam. Note your Patreon membership at the bottom of your RazzSlam Signup Form.
Now, without further ado, it’s your favorite hour of the week! I Can’t Believe It’s Not Not News is back again with all the Billy Hurley jokes and Grey Albright cackles you can handle, plus the triumphant return of Dongkey Teeth. First we discuss the new semen tree planted by Grey’s neighbor, right next to his driveway. Then we dig in on the extensive backlog of penis news stories, including erection cream lip treatments, Russian pilots with penis shaped flight patterns and a tiny chameleon with massive genitalia. Plus spinach has now learned to email and you won’t believe all the email scams spinach is dreaming up.
Tune in now for all the laughs and Albright cackles you can handle by signing up for the exclusive Razzball Patreon Club for only $5/month, or upgrade to receive the weekly podcast plus early access to all of Grey’s 2021 fantasy baseball rankings and posts for just $13/month!
Find all of this week’s hilarious stories here:
Please, blog, may I have some more?[brid autoplay=”true” video=”714656″ player=”10951″ title=”Razzball%202021%20Draft%20Kit%20%20Starters” duration=”150″ description=”” uploaddate=”2021-02-04 19:08:26″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/thumb/714656_t_1612486633.png” contentUrl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/714656.mp4″]
The top 40 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball fall roughly in the 75 to 125 overall for those of you who are wondering where we are overall, and, of course, when the rankings are done I will be along with a top 500 overall to show you exactly where we are. Think of this set of starters as your number twos and number threes, but, again, I will have a pitchers’ pairing tool to help with that too. I give and you receive. Ho, ho, ho, that’s me giving and you receiving. Here’s Steamer’s 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. As always, where I see tiers starting and stopping are included with my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?As you stroll up and down the grocery store aisles, you come to THAT row. You know that row – the one with the candy in the heart shaped box. Year heart starts racing and your palms get a little sweaty. Heck, you may even get that a tingle run through your body.
Please, blog, may I have some more?I don’t have some big introductory explanation here. I trust you grasp the premise and intend to skip this paragraph, but if I still have your eyes for the moment, I’ll say I imagine a start-up build for a 15-team, 2-catcher dynasty league when parsing through the lists and try to explain when a player’s value varies based on settings. If you’re in a contention window, your rankings should look a bit different than they’d look on the front end of a rebuild. I’ll flag some players along the way for whom the disparity in value can get especially large from build to build.
Please, blog, may I have some more?It is February! We are less than two weeks away from Pitchers and Catchers reporting across Florida and Arozarena. Sorry, does anybody else have nightmares of Randy dingers? Just me? So, as we turn the calendar and everyone is talking about the outlook for Nolan Arenado, I have decided to zig while the rest of the ‘normal’ writers zag. We kick-off the month with a heavyweight battle between Tempe’s sweetheart Mr. Anthony Rendon and the baby face of Fort Myers in Mr. Rafael Devers.
While 3B has become deeper over the past few years, there continues to be a jockeying for position near the top of the positional rankings. Looking at NFBC ADP since the beginning of the year Devers and Rendon are going back-to-back near the end of the fourth round. So how do these two profiles look for the 2021 fantasy baseball season?
Please, blog, may I have some more?Howdy, folks.
It’s unlikely you haven’t already heard, but ICYMI: esteemed national baseball writer Boob Nightenfail tweeted Thursday evening that the Mets had a done deal with Trevor Bauer. Then not even like five minutes later, all the cool kids tweeted how this, in fact, was untrue. Fast forward less than 24 hours later and Bauer signed a deal with Dodgers, along with some dumb hype video I haven’t yet and never will bother to watch. I’m just glad all of this is over, because I am so over Trevor Bauer. I hope he goes back to being the mediocre pitcher he’s always been. He’s jack diddly without pine tar, and that’s a fact!
Oh, Boob. Thanks for the laugh! As for the rest, here’s the best:
Please, blog, may I have some more?I mean, who doesn’t like an ole tried and true Clinton callback? Age me! I mean seriously, I must be getting too old, the whole devil-worshiping crisis actors controlled by the deep state while getting free pizza from Soros while getting shot in schools eating way too many of Michelle’s veggie’s stuff is just too hard to follow for me, so it’s always nice to think of the simpler times. And boy do we need those simpler times right about now as the newest and hopefully less-COVID filled 2021 season aims to begin, along with all the festivities, both real and fantasy, that come with it. So staying in spirit of what my little content corner provided in 2020, I’d like to start covering value players that can either be targeted in your drafts now, or even maybe some fringe value depending on the size of your leagues. With this first post, we’ll be taking a look at the middle infield position. In describing the meta of what the MI is right now, I’d say there’s quite the juxtaposition going on, and if you didn’t like the deployment of all these 5+ multisyllabic words, I guess what I’m trying to say is, you could make solid arguments that the middle infield is empty, or that there is plenty of talent to aim for. Or maybe I’m the only one and confused at what or who I want? Why not all three? One thing is for certain though, if you’re looking for a Willi, just like your mom, we want it slick! (This took me about 23 minutes to think of, so I’m not sure whether to laugh or cry.)
Please, blog, may I have some more?We’re now 6 years into Byron Buxton’s big-league career and it feels like we still don’t know who he is. You know, like when you’re in a long-term relationship and then you wake up and realize that you can’t completely rule out that the person next to you is a serial killer? Anybody else been there? I mean, I haven’t but I’ve seen a lot of Lifetime movies like that. Anyways Byron, we can only Netflix and chill for so long until you show me your true colors. Are you an elite base stealer who I can count on for 30+ steals in a full year? Are you a powerful slugger who belongs in the same breath as Aaron Judge and Joey Gallo? Or are you (gulp) an amazingly sexy power-speed threat who could finally put it all together and help me win a fantasy baseball championship in 2021?
Please, blog, may I have some more?[brid autoplay=”true” video=”714656″ player=”10951″ title=”Razzball%202021%20Draft%20Kit%20%20Starters” duration=”150″ description=”” uploaddate=”2021-02-04 19:08:26″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/thumb/714656_t_1612465780.png” contentUrl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/714656.mp4″]
The royal we already went over all the hitters for 2021 fantasy baseball rankings. That’s not the “royal we” as that term usually implies. It was me writing it alone while wearing a Burger King crown. I refuse to draft a top starter where they are usually drafted. Unlike hitters, you need six starters, depending on your league depth. Simple math tells us there’s plenty of starters to go around. Simple Math also says, “Stop putting words in my mouth!” Simple Math has an attitude problem. Simple Math says, “Try counting on your fingers without me!” Yo, eff you, Simple Math! In most leagues, there’s a ton of pitchers on waivers that can help you — all year. Not just in April. With the help of the Stream-o-Nator, you can get by with, say, three starters while streaming the rest. (By the by, Razzball Subscriptions are now open. Early subscribers get Rudy’s War Room, which I haven’t drafted without in about five years, and it’s worth the price of a subscription.) There’s also the fact that three stats by starters are difficult to predict due to luck. Wins, ERA and WHIP are prone to change, depending on which way the ball bounces and whether or not the guys behind the pitchers can score runs. Finally, the best starters can give you four categories. The best hitters can give you five categories. So, here’s Steamer’s 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2021 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. As always, where I see tiers starting and stopping are included with my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2021 fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?If you’re a fan of college baseball, then you know the 2021 NCAA season is right around the corner. Exciting! *unexpectedly, clapping begins* Right around the corner: that’s precisely what I said. Now, for some fans, that corner is well within sight. *clapping slows down, still unsure of where it’s coming from* If you’re a fan of a major Power Five team, then the 2021 campaign likely begins in just over two weeks, during the weekend of Feb. 19-21. That is, unless you’re a die-hard Big Ten supporter, in which case you still don’t even have a 2021 schedule. *clapping stops* That’s right — there is going to be a lot of variance entrenched in 2021 college baseball schedules. Some teams are starting on time and playing a full non-conference slate, while others will experience a delayed start while partaking in conference-only competition. This year, we will be comparing apples to bananas (not a big fan of oranges, plus they’re far too close in appearance) more than we ever have. But even with that, we need to move forward, and it all begins with my Preseason Top 50 Draft-Eligible College Players to Target in Dynasty Formats. Onward! *looks back to see no one following* I said, onward!
Please, blog, may I have some more?