MLB has seen an interesting list of players called up this week. The fact is, most rookies fail, especially on their first shot in the bigs. Tread carefully when putting in bids for these guys. They can be a tremendous boon to your team but can be a large waste of a FAAB budget just […]
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An advanced play on words that sounds like a sickness from eating spoiled mayonnaise? Perhaps. OR could it be in reference to a baseball player named “Whit” and the regret you may feel drafting him early and then watching him fuel your impending ulcer in the first month of the season? Naw, couldn’t be that one. But it’s okay folks, with Whit’s struggles so far this season, there has certainly been the now trademarked “Whitgret” taking place among the people and I’m here to say hold up! First make sure and confirm that you know this content is actually about Whit Merrifield, not Bobby Witt. Too many Whits so Wittle time. (That one is free.) Second, maybe try some Pepto Bismol. And if that doesn’t work, alcohol might. Third, try not to be repulsed by Merrifield’s .151/.198/.183 triple-slash so far, because frankly, you should be way beyond repulsion at this point. What’s worse than repulsion, propulsion? Science baby. Especially when he’s coming off a 2021 campaign that saw him produce a more pleasing and palatable .277/.317/.395 which while not exactly elite, was enough to enable 40 stolen bases and 97 runs. But since he’s on pace for none of these things thus far, rightfully, there is concern and alcoholism.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Like the Mets coming back to steal a ninth inning win, we are doing the improbable and shuffling it up with the Top 100 hitters for the rest of the fantasy baseball season. Maybe the Mets’ comeback is more impressive than this shuffle, but I still cannot imagine the Mets being must watch baseball! With that out of the way, we have some big moves this week with injuries to key players (see Eloy Jimenez) and returns for others (see Ramon Laureano). We also now have a month of insight to tell us who is real and who might simply be a mirage. In the spirit of Bill ‘Spaceman’ Lee, dig in to the rankings like a cosmic snowball means no tomorrow. Bonus points for those few that follow the reference!
Please, blog, may I have some more?Minnesota Twins rookie pitcher Josh Winder nabbed his second win of the season Friday night going six innings, allowing just three hits, and no earned runs (one unearned) while striking out eight. Winder up and let ‘er rip! The 25 year-old now has back to back wins after going six strong innings in St. P […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?A quick look at the Saturday slate has baseball fans excited for three double-headers. The excitement quickly stops when fans realize PIT/CIN is one of the double-dips. I am staying away from this mess (or am I?) considering you could not pay me to watch 18 innings of baseball between the Pirates and Reds. Remember, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Greetings, Razzobites! It is I, a messenger from the realm of Pain and Suffering. Last Friday, was an absolute bloodbath for IL entries. 12 players were added to the IL on April 29. Additionally, 13 players were added to the COVID-IL this week. The COVID numbers continue to rise with outbreaks in Cincinnati, Minnesota, and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?(NOTE: THIS POST WAS RELEASED EARLY THIS WEEK ON OUR PATREON. IT’S $10/MONTH.)
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, there’s no such thing as fooling someone three times. Fool me four times and, “Do you want a punch in the nose? Seriously, stop fooling me!” Fool me five times, and you’re the Royals and you’ve called up and demoted Edward Olivares that many times in the last year. If you would’ve told me the Royals could’ve roped me into buying Edward Olivares again, I would’ve told you why did I waste a genie wish on being turned into a steer and how did that cowboy rope me? Was he gentle? Check on me; I’m now a steer. Putting on Green Day and singing, “Buy Oliveras Of Unbroken Dreams,” and sobbing unnaturally. He’s burned us before? No, the Royals burned us! Olivares is a 25/15/.270 hitter that keeps getting yanked around like he’s the one who became a steer and not me. I’d grab him in all leagues, just in case this is the last time the Royals fool us. Five foolings, and that’s it! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?So I’ve been trying to look for silver livings when it comes to the slow starts of the hitters I have rostered in my deepest leagues and I’ve come up with this: at least I have a sense of calm knowing there’s really nothing I can do about it. While I actually had to stop […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The new Dr. Strange movie introduces us to the idea of being able to explore other universes, or multi-verse. I sure wish I could take that idea and incorporate it into the ever changing paradigm of baseball. For starters, there has to be a world where the use of performance enhancing drugs are actually healthy for us to use. Like if you could eat a can of spinach and get stronger. That would make for a really good movie! I don’t know, I just miss the days where you could have an exit velocity of 110 mph with a launch angle of 20 degrees and not have the ball die at the warning track. Clearly the pitchers don’t need anything like that, since 94% of all pitchers can throw 102. Now, give me some of that healing juice to offset the inevitable TJS that comes with such velocity. It would also be nice to have a universe where Byron Buxton stays healthy all season! Ok, that might fracture the fragile multi-verse! Maybe just 140 games…Baby steps.
Why, you may ask, would we want to change the game that we love so much? Well, for starters, I imagine the marketing dept for MLB is a room full of old white men who want to suck the fun out of everything. The unwritten rules and all! I can remember the buzz around StL when McGwire and Sosa were exchanging knock out blows….but I guess we would rather see the like of Edwin Jackson, Dallas Braden, and Phil Humber collect no-hitters like Pokeman cards.
Oh well, maybe we will just have to settle for today’s game. If we have to settle for that, then you have to settle for this next installment of Getting Ahead in Head to Head!
Please, blog, may I have some more?I was having an identity crisis, so I went to talk to my therapist. I told him that one day I felt like a teepee and the next day I felt like a wigwam. I said I don’t know which one is really me. I go back and forth–teepee, wigwam, teepee, wigwam. The psychiatrist finally […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?[brid autoplay=”true” video=”1000828″ player=”13959″ title=”BSH_%20Week5″ duration=”201″ description=”undefined” uploaddate=”2022-04-27″ thumbnailurl=”https://cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/snapshot/1000828_th_1651023244.jpg” contentUrl=”//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/1000828.mp4″]
Secretly, what no one could know, before yesterday’s game in Milwaukee, Christian Yelich hired a hitman. Did he want something done to a person? Heavens no! His fine eh eff mother raised that boy well! No, what Yelich wanted done he whispered into the ear of the hitman he hired off of Craigslist. Thanks to scouts Razzball hired, we know what was said, and by ‘scouts,’ I mean eavesdroppers. Yelich whispered, “Take this baseball bat that does me no good, and beat the shi*t out of the humidor until it no longer functions.” Yelich said the only way they’d know definitively that the humidor is busted is if Keston Hiura (1-for-4, 2nd homer) could hit it out. Job well done, Humidor Hitman! Yelich also benefited from his own mafia ties (3-for-5, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (4) and legs (3). The humidor hit was especially nice for me since two benefactors were two of my sleepers, Luis Urias (1-for-4, and his 1st homer, hitting leadoff), and the big star of the game, Willy Adames (2-for-4, 3 runs, 4 RBIs) hit his 7th and 8th homer, as he hits third. That sleeper of mine makes up for my Jarred Kelenic sleeper post! *dodges tomato* It doesn’t make up for it? *dodges another tomato* Okay! Geez! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?It was Wednesday. The sun had risen many hours prior and Son needed inspiration for his latest Razzball piece. The stomach growled. The mouth began to water. The nose began to inhale what the mind was dreaming of. Chicken and waffles from Roscoe’s then. As I eschewed the traffic-infested freeway of LA….Random thought: Don’t people […]
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