Tommy Joseph continued his early success last night going 2-for-4, with two home runs, and four RBI. I felt it was appropriate to go with the biblical headline because for those in desperate need of a corner infielder, Joseph has been heaven sent. The big game Friday brought his season stats to a .323/.333/.677 triple slash with seven home runs and 12 RBI in just 21 games (65 at bats). All this coming on the heels of Manager Pete Mackanin naming Tommy Boy the starter Friday afternoon over Ryan “I’m Not Sure How Old You Are Anymore, But I Would Have Guessed Older” Howard. Joseph has really turned on the jets in the past week hitting .438 with six runs, 4 homers, and 7 RBI. This isn’t coming completely out of nowhere either. After an abysmal 2015, Tommy was slashing .347/.370/.611 in 100 ABs at AAA this year. The advanced stats are a bit wonky for Joseph at the moment (.333 BABIP, 26.1 K%, .354 ISO), but don’t necessarily suggest Joseph is playing over his head. Regardless, TJ has carved out a nice spot for himself batting clean up for the Phils and I could see his success continuing. Grey told you to BUY, Joseph is available everywhere and is definitely worth grabbing in all leagues where you need a corner infielder with some pop.
Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:
Anthony DeSciafani– 6.0 IP, 8 hits, ER, 3 BB, 2 K. A lot of peeps were/are pretty high on Ant Man, but perhaps they are high on something else entirely? I dunno! Me? No, I’m not high I’m just sweating myself out until I hallucinate. Is that “high”? Anyway, Anthony pitched serviceably enough in his return but one would like to see a bit more versus a team like Oakland. He’ll get another chance to showmewhathesgot next week versus Atlanta. At under 20% owned, I’d be watching watching him closer than a Margaery Tyrell walk of atonement. Which is to say, when it doesn’t happen I’m going to be very upset. SHAME!
Tony Cingrani – 1.0 IP, 1 hit, SV (6). From rotoworld, “Cingrani has to be considered the least desirable full-time closer to own in fantasy leagues.” LOL. Ouch. Et tu, rotoworld? Give the guy a break, he is a SAGNOF through and through. Sure his 5.53 BB/9 is terrifying, but is he really worse than what the Twins are throwing out there?
Bud Norris – 7.0 IP, 4 hits, ER, 6 K, W. This Bud was for you. And by you I mean you or whoever happened to start him in your 18-team league. And by Bud I mean America.
Albert Almora, Jr. – 1-for-3, run. Hey, it’s a Cubs prospect and it’s a BUY and he’s starting and he got a hit and you should pick him up maybe! And hey, a butterfly!
Adonis Garcia – 3-for-3, HR (2). Well, I guess somebody’s gotta score some runs for the Braves. Why not Adonis? Really who else is there.
Daniel Murphy – 2-for-4, run, 3 RBI. If you drafted Daniel Murphy you are likely sitting pretty at the top of the standings, waving down to the plebs below you. Good job. Well fantasyed, my friend.
Stephen Drew – 2-for-4, HR (5), 2 RBI. So Stephen Drew isn’t exactly my favorite player. But he is very likely my least favorite player…and that’s only because his brother has long retired. Danny Espinosa was 3-for-4 with a HR (10) as well. You two can homer all you want, you still can’t keep me from my Trea. Soooooon.
Stephen Strasburg – 7.0 IP, 5 hits, 4 ER, BB, 10 K, W. The Strasborg is 10-0! Beep borp. Does not compute. 01010101011001! Initiating whiffcat sequencing. Sure he’ll never pitch more than 7 innings, those strikeouts tho!
Jayson Werth – 1-for-2, HR (10), 2 RBI. FWIW, which is an acronym that I’m told might be appropriate here, J-Dubs is hitting close to .300 with 4 homers and 13 RBI in the past two weeks. He may even be available in your league. Go check, I will wait here and google player stats.
C.C. Sabathia – 7.0 IP, 5 hits, 0 ER, 2 BB, 4 K. C.C.’s rocking the 2.28 ERA and 1.21 WHIP. Oh word, he’s back baby! Here’s what I said about C.C. a few weeks ago, “Pick him up if you hate yourself.” Hmm. OK, I was hoping I would have mentioned how he’s relied on his fastball less, and more on a combination of his sinker/cutter. But I guess I did not. So maybe I don’t have the highest confidence in Sabathia, and the advanced stats suggest he’s about to get his siz-ocks riz-ocked (4.62 xFIP and 3.2 HR/FB%). But thinking positively, the 2.28 ERA is a career best mark, he gets the Twins next week, and I’d absolutely ride this train until it crashes and burns something horrible. FWIW (<— my new favorite acronym) I picked him up, and if you must know, yes, I hate myself.
Steven Wright – 7.1 IP, 7 hits, 0 ER, 2 BB, 6 K, W. How comforting is it that Steven Wright, a knuckleballer, is my most reliable pitcher. With his 7-4 record, 2.09 ERA, 1.13 WHIP and 70/33 K/BB I guess I should be comfortable, but I’m not. It’s part of having crippling anxiety.
Xander Bogaerts – 4-for-5, HR (7), 4 RBI. AWESOME-X! I took Xander out for tapas and sangria (romantic AF, i kno rite) to celebrate him being the BEST SHORTSTOP IN BEISBOL! I’m not saying I called it, but I have been seeing X exclusively since last April and things are starting get real serious this year. I mean, Bogey is slashing .349/.398/.508 with seven homers, 40 RBI and eight stolen bases! Remember when I told you, X, to hit more homers so you can make that Sandoval money? Forget it! Don’t ever change. You stay exactly the way you are, boo.
Jackie Bradley, Jr. – 2-for-5, run, 2 RBI. I would have invited you to tapas, but, you know, it would just be awkward. You understand.
Brandon Moss – 2-for-6, HR (14), 2 RBI. Heyo, it’sa BUY! The say a rolling stone gathers no Moss, but when Brandon Moss is a-rolling he sure gathers a crap ton dingers! When it’s not Adventure Time, B-Mo is been busy batting close to .500 with 4 homers and 7 RBI in the past week. Mathematical!
Gerrit Cole – 2.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, BB, 3 K. Cole left this start with triceps tightness, and that means you know who could see a spot start? Jameson Taillon. I was talking about Taillon. If that was at all unclear. He’s the “you know who.”
Matt Carpenter – 2-for-4, 2 runs, HR (10), 3 RBI. I never mention Carpenter because he’s a player I would never target in a draft and therefore never own, but batting .400 with 15 runs in the past week? That will help your fantasy team!
Jhonny Peralta – 2-for-5, run. He’s hit safely in three out of the four games he’s played since his return with a home run and 5 RBI. I would grab him if he’s available before other people realize he’s available.
Matt Harvey – 6.0 IP, 2 hits, ER, 2 BB, 8 K. That’s three straight quality starts. And I mean quality. Your sell high/buy low opportunity is closing, depending on confident you are in Harvey.
Corey Kluber – 9.0 IP, 3 hits, 2 ER, BB, 8 K, W. He is good at throwing baseballs.
Hector Santiago – 1.1 IP, 7 hits, 5 ER, BB, 2 K. Must…stop…streaming…Hector Santiago. Have some self-control, man!
Hisashi Iwakuma – 7.0 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, BB, 3 K, W. I went for soba noodles with Iwakuma and he laughed at me for complaining my noodles were cold. I am so uncultured. How embarrassing for him. My b, sashi! Next time I’ll be chill.
Mitch Moreland – 2-for-4, 2 HR (8). FWIW, I’m not recommending you pick him up yet, but it is my duty to point out if he continues to hit (.333 AVG in the past week), he could very well replace Prince Fielder as an everyday player. How you doing Prince Fielder owners? Everything OK? Don’t let the existential dread set it. Don’t let it set in…
Dae-Ho Lee – 2-for-4, 2 HR (10), 4 RBI. He only starts against lefties but darn it to heck if he doesn’t crush them lefties. Darn it to heck, I say!
Clayton Kershaw – 8.0 IP, 5 hits, 2 ER, 13 K, W. Kersh has a 122/6 K/BB ratio, which is a stat that I have to assume could only be obtained by a high level operating thetan. Someone’s been putting in extra time at the auditing sessions. What if I told you you could pitch like Kershaw simply by harnessing the natural M.E.S.T. around you? You could control the universe! I have some literature I think you should read.
Johnny Cueto – 8.0 IP, 2 hits, 2 ER, 8 K. When your whole pitching arsenal is on point but you’ll never be as good as Kershaw.
Nolan Arenado – 1-for-4, HR (19), 2 RBI. Nolan leads the league in ding dongs! I remember last year when I owned you. I was younger then and the world was my oyster! Sigh. Don’t let the existential dread set in, Dan. Not now, you have to finish this post.
Wil Myers– 1-for-3, HR (13), 4 RBI. Wil the Thrill is doing things! In the past week, Wil “I Passed the Other L to the Player on My Left” Myers is batting .522 with 5 homers, 10 RBI, and 2 SB. Sweet sassy molassy! I’ve always had a soft spot for Myers, because we play Overwatch together. But doode in undeniably OP right now. Someone needs to be nerfed.
Jon Gray – 7.0 IP, 4 hits, 3 ER, ER, 7 K. Oh hey, it’s you again! Here’s what I said when I wrote about Gray a few weeks ago, “a Coors pitcher pitches at Coors and even in the most stream worthy of starts it makes him very hard for me hard to recommend.” Whoa, I am on fire with the endorsements lately! So pick him up, or don’t–why are you asking me? I’m more wishy washy and flippy floppy than Hillary Clinton! Lol political humor! How topical. Gray’s rocking the 2.25 ERA, 0.85 WHIP and 23 K in the past two weeks and dare I say is a must own in most leagues at this point. Grey told you to BUY, now I’m telling you pick him up everywhere and fast! How’s this for an endorsement. I love Jon Gray, and I don’t care who knows it. He’s the Coors ace I never knew I needed.
Thanks for reading! Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!