Pirates Don’t Enjoy Their Frutti Di Marquez Plate

June 30, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 323 Comments

[brid autoplay=”true” video=”811239″ player=”10951″ title=”RZBL%202021%20WAIVER%20WIRE%20WEEK%2013″ duration=”151″ description=”undefined” uploaddate=”2021-06-25″ thumbnailurl=”//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/thumb/811239_t_1624599385.png” contentUrl=”//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/811239.mp4″]

“Guten tag, mi amigos. Um, I mean, hola. I am mucho from a Spanish-language country and not at all on the run from the German authorities.” That was the Nazi in Exile as a youth, taking the very conspicuous name German Marquez. Yesterday, was a big-time “Hola, meine frau” as German Marquez took a no-hitter into the 9th inning in Coors, and ended up with 9 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.62 in 92 pitches, as he racked up his 11th Quality Start. My Jewish ancestors would never forgive me, but I want to help the Nazi in Exile, and in the process my better Angels. Well, not my better Angels, just the Angels. Someone disguise their voice, call up the Angels and tell them the Rockies will deal German Marquez for anything, because the Rockies are a very stupid organization. You can tell the Rockies they’re getting a guy named Ham Silliard and just read them Sam Hilliard’s Triple-A stats to them and they’ll go for it. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Red Sox > Cole In Your Stocking

June 28, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 328 Comments

by: Grey

*zooms microscope in on Gerrit Cole‘s spin rates on Statcast, accidentally zooms too close and cracks computer screen* Oopsie. Yesterday, Gerrit Cole (5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 2.66) had his ass handed to him, and not in a good way, like, “Hey, he’s got extra ass now like Vladimir Guerrero Jr.” The funniest or saddest, depending on whether you’re Gerrit Cole, is him giving up all kind of homers, then having his hat and glove checked by the umps. Wish someone would’ve warned me about Gerrit Cole and spin rates being checked in, say, March. WAIT A MINUTE! Someone did! It was March Grey. Damn, March Grey, you smart son of a bee! My Gerrit Cole schmohawk post from March is basically all about the spin rates, and how they’re in danger of coming back to earth. Dot dot dot. Coming back to earth unlike all the home runs the Red Sox hit off Cole yesterday. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ambulance Chasers, Week 10: La Fin de la Revolution Franchy

May 30, 2018 | Fantasy Baseball Injury Report | 2 Comments

by: Kerry Klug

After hitting 6 HRs and stealing three bases with a .254 average in his first 17 games, Franchy Cordero (OF, Forearm Strain) has slowed down considerably hitting only 1 HR and stealing 2 bases with a .222 average over his next 23 games with a 30:9 K/BB ratio. With Hunter Renfroe returning and Wil Myers due back soon — I’m afraid it’s the guillotine for Franchy. Stash or Trash: I’d be thinking of trashing him unless you’re in a deep league with not a lot of options. Fill In: Daniel Palka (2.1%.) Palka has been filling in for an injured Leury Garcia for the Chi-Sox and has been doing pretty well lately. Who is Daniel Palka? He’s a former third round pick who hit 34 HRs in 2016 in the Twins AA and AAA program. He’s also a guy who hit 29 HR and stole 24 bases the year before that. What the hell? Why isn’t this guy being added in all leagues? Well throughout his minor league career he’s had a strikeout rate in the high 20% with a contact rate in the 60’s. So far this season in the majors he has 23 strikeouts to only 3 walks so he’s performing pretty on-brand. After an 0 for 8 start to his major league career, Palka has 26 hits in 85 at bats with 4 HR, 15 RBI and 2 SB. If you need help in deeper leagues take a chance on Al Palka.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FantasyDraft: Aces Wild

June 6, 2017 | DFS, FantasyDraft |

by: Ignacio

After a short slate last night, we have ourselves a full slate tonight that is packed with a bunch of great pitching options. There are four pitchers listed over $20K on the slate so finding value bats is going to be key. Names such as Max Scherzer ($25,200), Robbie Ray ($23,200), Jake deGrom ($21,200), Chris Archer ($20,400) are all great options on the night. As we did last week, going to the Robbie Ray well is always dangerous but he has a great matchup vs. the San Diego Padres. The start is at home where he has struggled but he is in a groove right now and I do expect it to continue. Chris Archer should be a great option versus the Chicago White Sox as they really struggle against RHP. As a team, their OPS is almost .130 points lower and AVG is 60 points lower against Righties than it is against Lefties. Any of the 4 options should be solid and there a some cheaper pitchers and bats to team up with. Lets take a look at the picks…right after that jerkweed editor Sky comes in and talks about the Razzball Listener’s League link available over at FantasyDraft. [EDITOR’S NOTE]: Hey! Jerkweed is kinda harsh! But he’s right, though; you should hop in that Listener’s league today in the link he provided and I in no way added to make it sound like he called me a jerkweed prior to the editor’s note. It’s only $5 to get in on a 20 team league, go get you some today. Now on with Ignacio’s show…

New to FantasyDraft? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Two-Start Starters, Week 10: Do Not Lamet, For There Is Dinelson

June 3, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Two Start Pitchers | 33 Comments

by: mikeMaher

Thank Godley I didn’t spend any time last night thinking up Zack Godley puns. The Diamondbacks inexplicably sent him to the minors the other day. Inexplicably, I say! Stop trying to justify it to me! Yeah, his 4.78 K/9 vs. BB/9 (there has to be a better way to write that) isn’t great, but still! 2.39 ERA! Five straight quality starts! This is an outrage. I want to speak to a manager!

Ok, so he was apparently sent down temporarily as they recover from a 14-inning dance-off with the Pirates. He’ll be back. At least, he better be. He does, however, have to stay in the minors for 10 days now. So, no Godley-ness for a couple weeks. The Dbacks called up Silvino Bracho to take his roster spot, so at least they gave us a fun name to say. Silvino Bracho. Silvino Bracho. Silllll veeeee noooo braaaa chOOO.

Anyway, as the headline suggests (or tried to suggest), we are here to talk about Dinelson Lamet and not Godley. We have only seen Lamet for two starts in the bigs so far, and this week we are going to get two more. So, do we take the gamble and roll with the young starter from San Diego for two starts this week? Let’s take a look…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FantasyDraft: Left Her at The Altherr

May 14, 2017 | DFS, FantasyDraft | 2 Comments

by: FredWord

Good morning fellow Razzball readers. I’ve decided to throw a curveball and start the intro with an offensive player today. Just in case I have any friends or family members reading this post I have not left her at the Altherr, I just haven’t found the perfect ring yet. Aaron Altherr may slip through the radar since he is matched up against Gio Gonzalez. Gio has been off to a hot start however he is prone to the long ball, especially against righty bats. Altherr’s price tag comes in at a cool $7,200 which allows for some salary relief on a Colorado day. Let’s breakdown his stats, Alther currently has a .514 wOBA against LHP which is 6^th in the league and he also has 3 home runs in 24 AB’s. I’m aware the sample size is small, however, this is DFS and we are searching for an edge anywhere we can find one. The wind in DC will not help the RHB as it will be a cross-wind of about 16 MPH.

Note: The 2^nd game of both double headers are not included in the FantasyDraft main slate therefore I will be leaving those pitchers out of my write up today.

New to FantasyDraft? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, try out this 20 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your FantasyDraft whistle. It’s set to run Tuesday, May 9th @ 7:05 ET. $5 gets you in the door and the contest will run regardless of number of entrants, so make sure you hop in. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ambulance Chasers, Week 4: Dirt Bikes Used To Make Everything Better

April 27, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Injury Report | 14 Comments

by: Kerry Klug

Lots of little piddly injuries this week that don’t seem to be of much consequence. Self-proclaimed MVP candidate Yoenis Cespedes missed a few games with hamstring soreness, but seems ready to return. Stephen Strasburg must have had a great time on his July 20th birthday, because here we are nine months later and he is missing a start to be with his wife as they have their second child. Lil’ DP, Dustin Pedroia, has missed a few games after getting taken out by a Manny Machado slide that would make Ty Cobb proud until Cobb looked at a picture of Machado. And Justin Upton injured his forearm hustling into second base trying to outrun all the lofty hype and expectations we’ve heaped on him for a decade now.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Top 100 Starters for 2017 Fantasy Baseball

February 8, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 169 Comments

by: Grey

With these top 100 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball, I’ve finished our (my) 2017 fantasy baseball rankings for positions. Still coming will be a top 100 overall and top 500 to see how all the positions mesh together like your mesh Redskins jersey that meshes with your burgundy sweatpants. Trust me, when you see how long this post is, you’ll be glad I kept this intro short. As always, my projections are included, and where I see tiers starting and stopping. If you want an explanation of tiers, go back to the top 10 overall and start this shizz all over again. Anyway, here’s the top 100 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Undread Pirate And Crew Go Philadongphia Over Phillies

September 16, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 184 Comments

by: Grey

Real talk: is there some kind of unwritten law that the first year a new baseball commissioner takes over he’s allowed to institute juiced baseballs? Is Our Commissioner Manfred sticking Capri Sun straws in baseballs across the league? Does he have someone else do the actual juicing? When Bud Selig told Manfred that he could juice the baseballs did he finish by doffing his toupee? Does Manfred own Dozier in fantasy? I got questions, y’all! Yesterday, the Pirates added five more homers to MLB’s bottom line: Sean Rodriguez (2-for-5, 3 RBIs) with his 14th homer; Jordache Mercer (1-for-4, 3 RBIs) hit his 11th; John Jaso Jingleheimer Schmidt (1-for-4) his his 6th, but the real damage was done by The Undread Pirate, Andrew McCutchen (3-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBIs) with his 22nd and 23rd homer, hitting .250. McCutchen got old real fast in every conceivable way over the last two years. His BABIP fell faster than a 40-year-old on the Cheesecake Factory Diet, his Ks shot up like he’s Danny Glover and he “ain’t got time” for walks and his steals dried up quicker than Cougs’ cactus. An actual cactus she bought at the supermarket and forgot to water over the course of three years. What did you think I meant? Oh c’mon! All of that for McCutchen who is still only 29 years old! I’m beginning to think he’s 29 years old like Debra Winger’s listed as 29 years old on her headshot. In 2017, I think McCutchen won’t be drafted anywhere near where he’s been in the last two years. I wouldn’t be surprised to see him fall to the 75 to 100 range, which might actually reverse his fortunes and make him a value play again. Except for those that drafted Carlos Gomez this year, they’re not falling for the ol’ banana in the tailpipe again. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

From First Base To DH To Out Fielder

August 10, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 409 Comments

by: Grey

Rough year to be a Prince. Watch yourself William, Henry and the kid who played Fred in the atrocious Scooby-Doo movies. Prince Fielder is done from baseball with 319 homers. Of the tens of thousands of other baseball players that have played the game, the only other person retired with exactly 319 homers is Cecil Fielder. They are also the only two members of the 300-300 club — 300 HR/LB. This also leads me to believe we’re on an 18-year loop with 1998. Wait until Hillary Clinton meets a young Jewish intern in the White House who is just back from Cuba with some cigars. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Cishek Yourself Before You Wreck Your Labrum

August 5, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 354 Comments

by: Grey

Steve Cishek hit the DL with the same injury that sounds like it once affected Nadia Comaneci –a torn labrum. Grey’s got Olympics fever! Which this year sounds like it can be transmitted by a mosquito. “I’m not wearing my Brazilian national flag t-shirt to sit in the room all day! Actually, I feel a little woozy too.” That’s a family of four coming down with the Zika Virus at this year’s Olympics. With Cishek likely out for the year, grab Edwin Diaz in all leagues. On a related note, I’ll leave you with the Double Dutch Bus, a song that Missy Elliott later made famous on Gossip Folks. The chorus for Double Dutch Bus sounds like it’s just me trying to say the name Steve Cishek. Fast forward to 2:15 if you’re not feeling early 80s funk and just want the guy to say Steve Cishek repeatedly.

Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rangers Grab Some Brews, Fail To Catch Any Rays

August 2, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 705 Comments

by: Grey

When Jonathan Lucroy vetoed the trade to the Indians this past weekend, I thought we were going to find out Lucroy was Joey Lauren Adams in Chasing Amy. Other teams were going to try and convert him into one of their players, but he was always going to continue to play for the other team. Then, at some point, he was going to describe oral sex in insane, graphic detail, using balls, bats, and a gear shift, and other teams were just going to give up trying to get him to play for their team. Then it turned out the Brewers were not going to be “Holden” him forever, you can “Banky” on it. Jonathan Lucroy and Jeremy Jeffress were Chinese finger-cuffed to each other and sent to the Rangers for Lewis Brinson and Luis Ortiz. By the way, Luis/Lewis is the Spanish version of tomato-tomahto. I wonder what the Brewers finally said to Lucroy. “We love you, but, dude, if you really love this organization, you’ll get the eff out of here. Go!” Then cried in the rain all super-weepy like Ben Affleck. So, Lucroy gets a small boost in value from the lineup, but the stadium change is nearly a push. As for Jeremy Jeffress, who is Jason Lee in this scenario, will work set up for Sam Dyson, who will keep the job. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?