Please see our player page for Jhoulys Chacin to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

Rick Porcello said of his catcher, Sandy Leon, “He’s the best catcher I’ve ever thrown to.  Period.”  It’s a shame people don’t end include other forms of punctuation when speaking.  “I am the Red Sox ace.  Question mark.  No, I forgot about Chris Sale.  Period.  Actually, exclamation mark.  The best Red Sox pitchers.  Colon.  Not Bartolo.  Period.  I’m going to list them.  Period.  Okay.  Comma.  Damn.  Comma.  I apostrophe V-E confused myself.”  Yesterday, Porcello threw a sparkler — 7 IP, 2 hits, 0 walks, 1 ER, 10 Ks, ERA at 4.04, and roped a double to right, which is fun in a dog on rollerblades-type way, but is kinda irrelevant.  What’s less irrelevant, Rick Porcello is pitching better this year than his Cy Young year, though with less ERA to show for it, obviously.  That could change in the final six weeks if he finds his groove.  Period.  Ya know what, exclamation mark.  Strike that, interrobang.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yesterday, Daniel Poncedeleon was called up and threw no hitter (thru seven innings and then was pulled from game while striking out three hitters, but it’s more fun to say he threw a no-hitter, so ignore this).  Incredibly, Poncedeleon is 478 years old, and he could be the ROY.  *intern whispers in my ear*  That’s an F?  What the hell is, ‘He could be a FOY?’  The fountain of the year?  What are you talking about?  Rookie of the youth?  What are you talking about?  Sorry, having a miscommunication with my intern.  Any hoo!  In Triple-A, he had a 10.1 K/9 — up my giddy! — a 4.7 BB/9 — put my roll on slow! — a 2.15 ERA — getting the fever! — with a 4.99 xFIP — so I’m taking some ‘Tussin.  He might surprise some major league lineups, but he could easily go out and destroy you.  By the way, Bartolo Colon is so intent on 300 wins that he might follow Poncedeleon wherever he goes.  On the reals, Poncedeleon’s dad in the stands after his son threw seven no-hit innings gave me the feels, especially when you figure his dad has to be at least 498 years old.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Mets started Jerry “Mathers As The” Blevins yesterday (as a starter; not because the Mets are ‘bullpenning’ but because they are bullsh*tting), taking advantage of the Mets waving the white (person sitcom star) flag was everyone on the Dodgers.  First up, Enrique Hernandez (3-for-6, 3 runs, hitting .232) as he hit his 11th and 12th homer in Metco.  Or as Jesse Jackson would say, “Kike homered in Jaime town.”  By the by, players who Hernandez has more homers than (this is gonna make you cry):  Jose Abreu, Bregman, Dozier, Ozuna, Matt Chapman and Smoak, to name but a few.  I’ve been rocking Enrique — sounds Enrisqué! — for the whole year in an NL-Only league, but he doesn’t play every day (unlike all those schmohawks he’s besting on power).  Next up, Cody Bellinger (2-for-5, hitting .239) as he hit his 14th and 15th homer.  I get the sense that people think Cody’s absolutely bombing out his sophomore year.  Not close.  He’s not repeating his great rookie year (yet), but he is top 75-ish on the Player Rater and could easily be top 30 on the year with one extended hot streak.  Lastly, Max Muncy (2-for-5) hit his 15th homer, or as I like to call him, This Year’s Chris Taylor.  Muncy is having a legitimate breakout, or the Dodgers are slowly poisoning Taylor to make Muncy look great for a case of Muncyhausen By Proxy.  I think it’s the former, but a teamster smoking may not be the only one leaning on the latter.  To buy Muncy’s breakout, you have to buy a near-30% HR/FB, but he is top 35 for exit velocity, top 10-ish for hard contact percentage, and 2nd for Barrels.  What does all this mean?  The breakout looks real and beautiful.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Kelvin Herrera was traded to the Nationals, and immediately lost his fantasy value — from a total geek to totally chic back to Game of Thrones’ Reek.  From a SAGNOF hero to a SAGNOF zero.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ketel Marte (3-5% FAAB) is not the most intriguing pick-up of all time. He will not star in any Dos Equis commercials alongside silver-haired foxes who dive out of planes into the North Atlantic as an extreme form of salmon fishing. However, if you have injuries, it was surprising to see Marte available on the waiver wire. If your league is savvy enough, someone may be stashing the 24-year-old Arizona shortstop still trying to achieve his full potential. Since June began, Marte has 3 of his 4 HR to go along with a .426 ISO, 209 wRC+, and 3 barrels, that have all come on offspeed pitches. He has found more success this year on breaking and offspeed pitches. In fact, all 4 of his homers have come off of these offerings. Marte hasn’t made significant changes. However, now that he has 316 games of experience in the majors, this young player can finally be comfortable in the box against big league stuff. The MLB is not the best for a kid who can’t catch up to fastballs. Ketel Marte is now making all the contact you want to see while adding a little power to go with the speed. He’s not going to turn into a 20/20 candidate overnight, but that speed potential has been there this whole time. Pairing it with 15 HR pop is what Marte needed to stay relevant in today’s fantasy baseball landscape. While Ketel Marte doesn’t have off-the-charts raw power, he is looking a little more athletic these days, and it shows in the numbers. Pick him up where he is available and enjoy a solid floor for the rest of the season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“Lower the koozie a little bit.  No, a little bit more.  Okay, now spray some mist on the outside of the can to make it look like it’s sweating.  Now rub your finger from the D in Dr. to the R in Pepper.  This is romance!  For me!”  That’s me explaining to Cougs how I want her to seduce me with a visual metaphor of Juan Soto.  Or as I like to call him, Sexy Dr. Pepper.  Last night he hit two more homers (2-for-3, 4 RBIs) and now has five homers on the year, hitting .344 since his call-up and he’s only 19 years old.  *puts handkerchief to head, faints*  He was the first 19-year-old to homer at a Yankee Stadium since Ken Griffey Jr. in 1989.  He is the fifth youngest major leaguer with a two-homer game (Mel Ott, Danny Murphy (not that one), Griffey, Andruw Jones).  He is the third youngest major leaguer to show up at Yankee Stadium and say, “A concession guy offered his wife to me for sex.” (Fritz Peterson and Mike Kekich)  Not to put the hype too much to eleven, but he is blowing away what Bryce and Trout did when they were both 19 years old.  19-year-olds who hit a home run in the last 40 years:  Soto, Bryce, Trout, Justin Upton, Andruw, Griffey and Juan Gonzalez.  Betting on a 19-year-old to fail who is already up in the majors succeeding is betting the Don’t Pass line, and no one likes that guy.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ya know, if you’re gonna get busted for PEDs and be suspended for 80 games, the way to do it is right after fracturing your hand.  It’s like coming down with mono the week of your prom when you have no date.  “Damn, am I gonna miss that?  That is too bad, but I am so drowsy I feel like I have two Forest Whitaker eyes.”  That’s you getting prom-o-mono.  I am more surprised to hear Robinson Cano was busted for PEDs, than I am to learn he had no idea he was taking the illegal substance.  Baseball is currently batting a thousand for denials of PEDs suspensions. MLB players’ denials of taking the illicit substance should get into the Hall of Fame on its first ballot.  Speaking of Hall of Fame, I kinda thought Robinson Cano was headed there.  This will obviously shade a cloud over his entire career, which I do think is a shame.  What’s also a shame, you need to drop him in all leagues.  He’s more or less done for the year.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Continuing his NL-West dominance, Tyson Ross took a no-hitter into the eighth inning Friday night, allowing just one earned run off one hit (a pinch-hit Christian Walker double) and three walks while striking out ten. I’m sorry but I just completely blanked on everything you said before, “while striking out ten.” Tyson was tattooing faces and D-Backs, the 7.2 innings pitched was a season high and it took him 127 pitches to get there. He was just four outs from San Diego’s first no-hitter in ever, but nah. SAD! Another day I guess? You’ll get there, Padres. Errr. Don’t force it. Welp. Regardless, it might be premature to re-anoint Ross the ultimate hodgepadre status he achieved in 2014-2015 season when logged ERAs of 2.81 and 3.26, but things are looking promising early. Let’s face it, Texas is where pitchers go to die when Colorado’s roster is full. Just ask Bartolo Colon. Ross’ back in San Diego where he can pick up where he left off. He’s currently sporting a sparking 2.81 ERA with a 1.01 WHIP, and its the 3.21 xFIP, 23.5 K% and 6.9 BB% that got me all hyped up and mouth-punchey on Tyson. Ross will face a true test next week when he takes on the Rockies at Coors, and while I can’t recommend him for this start, I’ll be watching it closer than the Westworld premiere because robots doing human things is clearly more interesting to me than humans doing human things. Look I’m not trying to bite your ear off (zing!), I’m just suggesting you give Tyson Ross a good look. He’s available almost everywhere and he’s got the history, the ballpark and the skillz to be undisputed heavyweight champion of the world–err, I mean, hes got the skills to be a very solid starter all season long, in other words, he wants to eat your children.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Does anybody else remember the Adventures of the Gummi Bears? It was on the Disney Channel back in the day and it was THE Saturday Morning jam. Medieval, personified bears, that bounce like kangaroos. Where do I sign up, right? In one of the sloppiest and more unconnected openings in Razzball history, starting pitchers are nothing like Gummi Bears. No, they are not my Saturday Morning jam. They’re my Saturday Morning job, digging into numerous deep dives, for hours on end, trying to figure out which players are trending where. The results of these Saturday Morning exercises are below. As a reminder these rankings are for 5×5 roto with value focused on rest of season value for 2018. So, a player like Michael Kopech is ranked for his value over the entirety of the 2018 season. Not just the next month. In previous seasons, this post was a weekly ranking with a pitching profile included. This year we will continue the weekly pitching profile, but once a month we will update the rankings. Because honestly, how much can happen in a week? One or two starts? So there’s changes coming for 2018, but they’re slight, and you’ll still get the same quality profiles, notes, and ranks. You might also get a cupcake or a venereal disease, but no telling which one. The expiration dates will just be a little longer. On the rankings not on the cupcakes or your fresh batch of herpes.

Here’s my Top 100 Starting Pitchers for 2018 Fantasy Baseball.

Please, blog, may I have some more?